Rules of the Game (42 page)

YOU
: Quick question: Do you think spells work—like magic spells? I know it's an unusual question, but I'll tell you why I'm asking in a second.

HER
: I don't know. [
If she doesn't answer, just pause and then continue with the story
.]

YOU
: Okay. You see my friend over there—he just moved here. And he met a girl at a club. He wasn't interested in her sexually, because she wasn't really his type.

HER
: Sure he wasn't.

YOU
: No, really. Anyway, so, she came over to his house a couple nights later to watch a movie and nothing happened.

HER
: [
rolls eyes
]

YOU
: Really, nothing happened. Anyway, after she left, he was cleaning, and he lifted up his sofa cushion and found a corroded metal ring underneath with a scroll inside and, um, some feathers wrapped around it. So he unrolled the scroll, and called me and said there were some weird, undecipherable letters on it. I told him it sounded like a magic spell. So he decided to bring it to this occult-and-spirituality-type store where they sell like vials of what they claim is dragon blood. And this woman there said it was an attraction spell.

HER
: No way.

YOU
: Yeah, and now the strange thing is, he's suddenly finding himself attracted to her. Like he can't get her out of his mind. Sometimes he'll be walking down the street, and an image of her surrounded by flowers will just pop into his head. So do you think it's the spell or it's just psychological?

HER
: I think …

Type of Routine:
Opener/Value Demonstration

Difficulty Level:
3/10

Success Rate:
87.5%

Saturation:
2.1%

Comments:
“Responses were varied but enthusiastic, though everyone loved the part of the routine about dogs and babies. Distance seemed to play a factor when asking women to come open another group with you afterward. However, simply making it a smaller distance seemed to solve the problem.”—Metz

Origin:
Over dinner one night, the Stylelife coaches and I were reviewing the topics women seem to enjoy discussing most. One was relationships, another was spirituality, and a third was animals. We realized that there were openers about relationships (like the love versus in-love opener) and spirituality (like the spells opener), but none about animals. So we decided to play a game that night and try to guess what kind of pet women we met had at home. It eventually evolved into the following opener. Feel free to make up your own pet-owner theories based on your experiences with this routine. And don't forget to incorporate the cold-reading tips you learned on Day 15 of the Stylelife Challenge.

YOU
: I have to ask, out of curiosity, which do you like better, cats or dogs? [
After performing this routine a few times, you should be able to open by guessing
with some degree of accuracy whether each person in the group is a dog or cat person
.]

HER
: I'm a cat [
or dog
] person. I actually have two at home.

YOU
: That's so funny. My friend was just telling me he could figure out whether someone was a cat or dog person based on their personality. At first I didn't believe him, but he says cat people tend to be more assertive and have stronger personalities and convictions, which is why they get a pet that's more feminine. He said it's a yin-yang thing. Dog people tend to be more shy and gentle, which is why they want a more masculine animal around to balance them. It kind of made sense, so I thought I'd see if he was right.

YOU
: Before I go, we should quickly test it out. [
Pause
.] What do you think those people are?

HER
: I'd say the girl over there is a cat person, and the one next to her is a dog person.

YOU
: Cool. Let's go find out.

YOU
: He also has another interesting theory. He says that when a woman in her twenties or thirties gets a dog, it means she's ready to have children. I guess it's because she wants to take care of something.

HER
: Yeah, that's so true …

YOU
: They also say that the way a guy treats his pet is the way he's going to treat his children.

Type of Routine:
Opener

Difficulty Level:
3/10

Success Rate:
84.5%

Saturation:
0%

Comments:
“I had one girl say she did exactly what the opener describes. I refused to give her my number and told her she'd have to stalk me on Face-book. I got her friend request the next morning.”—C
LOVER
T
HIEF

Origin:
Unlike the other openers, this comes from one of the Stylelife coaches, Stephen Grosch. It's included because it's something he uses to start conversations with bartenders and waitresses. What's interesting about the story is that it portrays him as the type of guy who's generous with his friends and whom waitresses find attractive. And, like all the other openers here, it's true. Ultimately, Stephen invited the waitress in the story to his house and they slept together, even though she had a boyfriend. Evidently, she loved her boyfriend, but wasn't
in
love with him.

YOU
: Real quick, I need a professional opinion on something. The other night, a bunch of friends and I went to this amazing restaurant. Our waitress seemed cool as hell, and we were really hitting it off. At the end of the night, I was very close to getting her number. But then I decided not to because I thought she might have been flirting just to get a bigger tip. You
know how waitresses will do that. Some will actually touch male customers on the shoulder when they talk to them because supposedly that makes them tip better.

HER
: No way.

YOU
: Yeah. So anyway, when we paid, since it was my turn to pick up the meal, I paid for it with a credit card. Then we left, and I figured that next time I'm in there, I'll see how it goes and then maybe get her number. Well two days later, to my surprise, I get a message from her on Facebook [
feel free to substitute your social networking site of choice
] saying how cool we all were and how much she'd like to meet me. Apparently, she copied my name off my credit card and looked me up!

HER
: Oh my God.

YOU
: I haven't responded yet, and I'm not sure if I will. But do you think that's cool of her to do or kind of creepy?

HER
: I guess it's kind of cool and flattering.

YOU
: So if you were eating out, and the waiter Facebooked you afterward, you'd think it's cool?

HER
: Um, that would actually be really creepy.

YOU
: So it's creepy if a guy does it, but cool if a girl does it? Isn't that kind of a double standard? [
If you're talking to a waitress or a bartender, add:
] And by the way, don't get any ideas: I'm paying in cash.

Type of Routine:
Opener

Difficulty Level:
2/10 (average)

Success Rate:
88.5% (average)

Saturation:
1.5% (average)

Comments:
“The opener about hair color was the easiest to deliver. It was quick and successfully opened low- to medium-energy sets. A root is crucial. My root: ‘I just asked my buddy whether he preferred blondes, brunettes, or redheads. And he responded, ‘I like ravens.'” —Jadebelly

Origin:
Many openers involve asking someone for an opinion on a lengthy issue. However, there are many other ways to start an interesting, spontaneous conversation without appearing to hit on anyone. These can be especially useful in a noisy environment, like a club, where it's more difficult to tell a long, involved story. Here are a few quick additional openers.

See that guy over there? He just told me he knows kung fu. Why exactly do you think he would say that to me out of the blue?

See that girl over there? She just told me she's a white witch. What does that mean?

Who would you trust more, an older woman or a younger woman?

If a woman with brown hair is a brunette, a woman with red hair is a redhead, and a woman with yellowish hair is a blonde, what's the word for someone with black hair?

What's the name for that dance people do in the Cirque du Soleil where they're hanging from those red ribbons? I want to learn that but can't figure out the name so I can Google it.

Can you hold on to this for a sec [
hand her a glass or camera or phone
]? Thanks. [
Pause
.] A friend of mine taught me that the best way to butt into a conversation was to give someone something to hold. And I wanted to test it out.