RYDER: A Standalone Military Romance (Blake Security Book 1) (11 page)

              “How do you know there’s not a big one lurking around?”

              “Gators are loners when they get older. They only hang out together until they’re six or so, and then they break off and find their own territory.”

              “How do you know so much about them?”

              I laughed. “I grew up with them, and Granny. Granny knows everything.”

              She smiled. “You and she are cute with each other. Can I ask where your parents are?”

              “My dad was killed in an accident when I was five and my mom…well, your guess where she is would be about as good as mine.”

              “I’m sorry,” she said, sincerely. “But remember that sometimes when they stay and don’t want to be there, it’s not so good either.”

              I nodded. “Can I ask you a question now?”

              She grimaced. “As long as it’s not about the men looking for me.”

              I nodded. Hopefully we’ll get to that someday soon. “One of your brothers lives in Mississippi. Why don’t you go to him for help?”

              “I guess you know that from my background check?”

              “Yes.”

              “Aleks has his own life. He has a good job and a wife and baby. The last thing he needs are my problems. He left Moscow to avoid the problems there. I don’t want to bring them to him here.”

              “One more question?”

              “I suppose, greedy.”

              I smiled. “Can I kiss you again?”

              I thought she’d say no, but I had to ask. To my delight, she nodded. I didn’t give her time to change her mind. I put my arm around her and pulled her in closer as I crushed my mouth down on hers. For those few moments while we kissed it was like the earth tipped on its axis. Alicia was safe and here in my arms. Blake was sleeping at night and living his life instead of hiding. Granny didn’t fight with alligators. It was like Alicia made everything right in my world, and I wished once again that it could last forever.

RYDER

I was on patrol only a few blocks from the ramshackle hospital set up by Doctors Without Borders and had been for the past two weeks. When we first received the assignment, I’d been pissed. I was young and still an adrenaline junkie. I loved the missions where we parachuted down into the line of fire. I liked the ones where we narrowly escaped the explosions that littered the roadways. I didn’t like foot patrol. It was hot and boring…most of the time. For those first two weeks, as I patrolled with my partner Wheezy, I complained to him almost non-stop about how bored I was. He was even younger than I was and surprisingly patient. I might have used that M27 on me if I were him, just to shut me up. What I didn’t realize then was that he may have been younger, but he was a lot wiser.

“You know, sir, a slow day means that no one goes home in a box.”

“A mission executed right means the same thing,” I told him arrogantly. I was on my third tour, and so far I hadn’t seen anyone close to me die. Up to that point we’d been the heroes, swooping in for the save at the last minute. I didn’t know it yet, but I had been living on the perimeter of hell and soon I would be staring it in the face.

That day as we passed by the concrete building that housed the hospital I looked inside the triage tent set up outside. I looked at the faces of the sick children and the worried mothers as they waited to be seen, and the nurses and doctors who volunteered to be thousands of miles from their homes and their families, and for some reason, it tugged at my heart that day. There was a lot of chaos going on inside of the tent, but the cries of one little boy seemed to transcend it all and reach out to me. My eyes scanned the faces in the tent until they landed on a tiny little brown-skinned boy with almost no hair on his head. He couldn’t have been over six years old, and the sight of his miserable little face penetrated the walls of my self-absorption like nothing else had in a while.

“Hey, Wheezy, you still have one of them lollipops?”

Wheezy stopped walking and looked into the tent as well. While we patrolled, he told me stories of how bad his asthma used to be as a kid. He said he practically lived in the emergency room and pediatrician’s office. He finally outgrew it, but he told me all of that missing school and not being able to play with other kids had changed him. It had made him shy and introverted, and he had bouts of severe anxiety. Somehow, from all of the years of doctor’s offices and lollipops, a lollipop was the only thing that could calm him down. His mother sent hundreds of them to him every month, and he never left base without a handful in his pocket. He took a blue one out then and handed it to me.

“Thanks. I’ll be right back.” At that moment, I honestly intended only to do a good deed. I just wanted to see that miserable little boy smile. But when I was about two feet away from him, I was finally able to see whom he was looking up at, and she stopped me in my tracks. She was dressed in dark blue scrubs that weren’t sexy in the least, but on this woman they were as hot as a ball gown. Her long, wavy, dark hair was pulled back into a ponytail at the nape of her neck, and her dark blue eyes took up about half of her face. The other half was a cute little nose with light brown freckles across it and lips that most supermodels would die for. I wondered in my own selfish way why a woman like that would choose to dedicate her life to a place and a profession like this. She must have seen me watching them out of the corner of her eye because she looked at me and said, “Can I help you?” I hadn’t so much as kissed a woman in months. I had a whole list of ways she could help me. I kept them to myself, and instead I held out the lollipop in the little boy’s direction. It was almost miraculous, the way it stopped his wailing almost instantly. He held a pudgy little hand out, and I placed the lollipop into his hand. He rewarded me with a smile that transformed his miserable little face into that of an angel. Strangely enough, for a few seconds, I forgot about the hot woman, but when I looked back up at her I had to admit that I was glad I’d done this “good deed.” She was smiling at me, too. She had a radiant smile, and it went straight through me.

“That was very kind of you. Mikel was having trouble letting me take his blood. I need it to adjust his medication. Are you ready to do that now, Mikel?”

The little boy nodded. Blue slobber ran down his chin as he devoured the lollipop. “I’m glad I could be of service, ma’am. I’m Ryder Grant, and I’ll be around for another few weeks. If you need anything, just whistle and I’ll come running.”

I could tell by the look on her face that she knew a player when she saw one. Still, she was smiling. “Well thank you, Ryder Grant. I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Ma’am, would it be forward of me to ask your name?”

She didn’t seem like the type that smooth charms would work on, so I was going for the sweet country boy angle.

“It’s Sarah. Doctor Sarah Middleton.”

“Dr. Middleton”—I gave her a slight, terribly corny bow—“until we meet again.”

For the next two weeks I stopped by the hospital every day. What started as an attraction to an incredibly beautiful woman quickly sprouted friendship, mutual respect, and something I convinced myself could turn into love once we were out of that horrible place. I was already thinking about not going back for a fourth tour and moving to Baltimore where she was from. I knew it was way too soon for all of that, but like I said, I was bored. So I built up these incredible fantasies in my head of our life together once we got back to the United States, and I convinced myself that it would all come true someday.

It was the beginning of our fifth week on the assignment I had come to love. Wheezy and I were about three blocks from the hospital when the first explosion sounded. The ground underneath our boots rolled, and Wheezy was knocked to the ground. I reached a hand out and helped him to his feet, and we took off at a run up the street. The rest of our unit was on our heels, and one of the men yelled out, “What the hell was that?”

“A car bomb maybe. I don’t know,” I told him. I was praying in my head that it hadn’t come from where it sounded like it had. If my ears didn’t fail me, the explosion had been perilously close to the hospital.

“It sounded like it came from the hospital, sir,” one of the other guys said. I ignored him and kept running. When we rounded the first corner where the hospital normally came into view, all I could see was thick, black smoke and piles of rubble. My heart pounded in my chest at an alarming rate—and I ran faster. I ran right toward where the tent had been. It was gone— and in its place was a mound of crumbling cement and raging blue and yellow flames. I could hear muffled screams and—without thinking about how hot those bricks were—I started lifting and moving them. The rest of my unit surrounded me and did the same. They dug until the flames threatened to consume them. I kept digging. Sarah’s pretty face kept coming into my head, and I kept imagining her trapped underneath that pile. Wheezy tried to get me to stop, but I pushed him away. My gloves were melted to my hands, and my uniform had begun to smolder by the time four of my brothers dragged me out of there.

They sat me down on the curb, and as the fire unit fought to put out the fire, the medic cut off what was left of my gloves. I didn’t feel any pain. I was numb. I’d convinced myself that both Sarah and I would get out of here someday and we would be together.

“Sir?” The medic was talking to me.

“What?”

“Do you see her, sir?”

“What? See who?”

“The doctor, sir. See over there…?”

That was when I started screaming…

“Ryder?” I heard the soft voice through my screams. I thought it was Sarah. All I could see was her body consumed in flames… “Ryder wake up!” The light was suddenly in my face, blinding me through my closed lids. I brought my arm up to cover my eyes, and it collided with something. I heard a little “Oomph!” “Ryder! Please wake up. It’s just a dream. You’re okay. Open your eyes.” The voice wasn’t Sarah’s, it was Alicia’s. I wrenched my eyes open. Alicia’s beautiful face hovered above me. I was drenched in sweat and shaking all over. “Are you okay?”

I was disoriented. I remembered the dream because I’d had it so many times before. It always left me confused. Everything happened just as it had that day…right up until the end. My mind wanted to force me to see something I’d never saw that day. I didn’t see Sarah’s body, ever. As far as I knew, they never recovered it.

“Ryder, you’re scaring me.”

I forced myself to focus on Alicia then. She looked terrified. “Damn! I’m sorry, Alicia,” I croaked out in a hoarse voice. I could still actually feel the smoke burning my throat and lungs.

“Don’t be sorry. It was a bad dream. Are you okay?”

I nodded. “Yeah, just a bad dream. I’m fine…thank you.” She stood up then, and I realized she was leaving me to go back to her own room. A sense of panic seized me—and all of a sudden I felt like if she left, I’d never see her again. “Alicia! Please don’t go. Don’t leave me.”  She stood at the edge of the bed dressed in a fuzzy robe that came to her knees and a pair of fuzzy slipper socks that matched. She looked adorable, and I could see by the look on her face that she was having an internal struggle over my request. “I just want you to stay with me until I go back to sleep,” I told her. “Please. I’ll be a perfect gentleman.” I wanted so much more from her…someday, but not tonight.

She smiled and lay down next to me. I couldn’t help thinking that it was a good sign she was beginning to trust me. I slid my arm underneath the back of her head and pulled her into my side. Her warm body molded into my shirtless, sticky body, and I heard her let out a contented little sigh. I kissed the side of her face and inhaled the sweet coconut scent of her hair. When I closed my eyes, it was to a dreamless sleep, possibly the best sleep I’ve ever had.

ALICIA

              I woke up in Ryder’s arms. It had been so long since I slept with a man that I was confused and frightened at first. When I opened my eyes and realized it was Ryder, a sense of peace came over me like nothing I had felt in a really long time. Maybe ever. I lay there for a long time, looking at his handsome face in the light coming in through the blinds. I loved the color of his deep brown eyes but closed they were even sexy. His lashes were long and dark, and as he slept, they fanned out handsomely. His nose was long and regal looking, and his lips…God, I loved those lips. He kept his hair cut short, probably a habit from the military. I wondered if that’s what he was dreaming about last night. He’d been shaking so hard when I first came in the room that I feared he was having a seizure. When he asked me to stay, I worried that he was looking for sex. I can’t say that I wasn’t thinking along those lines…almost every time I looked at him. Right now the covers were back to his waist, and I’m so tempted to trace the hard lines of his chest that my fingers almost itch with desire. He’s wearing flannel pajama bottoms, but they’re thin and I can feel his desire pressing into me even in his sleep. I do want him, but the timing is all wrong.

              Reluctantly, I slid quietly underneath the big arm he had wrapped across me. I loved the colorful band he had tattooed around the bicep and the one he had on the right side of his chest. That one was some kind of symbol with foreign words I didn’t understand, but it was beautiful. He’s beautiful. I was curious about the scars on his hands and forearms, but I hadn’t worked up my nerve to ask. Oddly, I loved the way they felt when he touched me. I had an idea in my head that he’d gotten them protecting someone, and it was one more reason that I felt safe when he was around.

I let my eyes linger on the bandage across his left shoulder then and my resolve to leave returned. I tore myself away and tiptoed toward the door. I had to get out of there now. If I tried to leave while he was awake, he’d only follow me. I hated the idea that I’d already gotten him hurt. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I was responsible for him getting killed. I went to the room his Granny was kind enough to let me stay in. As I got dressed, I thought about how different my life may have been if I had someone who cared about me that much when I was a child. I pushed that thought away, too.

My life was how it was, and I couldn’t change the past. I could, however, change the future, and that was exactly what I intended to do. I was sick and tired of my life being controlled by men who only wanted to use me. I was sick and tired of thinking happiness was only for other people and that I didn’t deserve any of it. If it was the last thing I did, I would at least make sure that the people I loved were free to choose their own lives and make their own happiness.

I snuck back across the hall to make sure Ryder was still asleep. He had hardly slept at all while at the mansion watching Celia and me. I smiled when I thought about him with the baby. He was like a giant next to her, but when he touched her, he’d been so gentle and Celia had sensed what a good and kind heart he had. My chest tightened up at the thought of never seeing that baby again. I hated the thought of people who didn’t want her raising her. But I had too many problems of my own right now to do anything about that. I had to put that away for now and get out of here while I still had time.

I made my way to the kitchen quietly and sat my bags down. I found a pen and a napkin and I left a note for Ryder and his Granny:
“I wish I knew the words to thank you both. You opened not only your home but your hearts to me. In the short time that I’ve known you, I’ve learned a lot about family and how things should be when you care about someone. I hope you understand that I have to go. If I stay here, you might be in danger. Ryder, you’re my hero. Without you I wouldn’t have gotten this far. I’m going to do something horrible today. I’m taking your car. I will call and let you know where I left it for you. Please forgive me. Please be safe and happy. Alicia.”

              I took the car keys off of the counter where Ryder had set them the day before, and then—taking my bags—I slipped quietly out the door. My heart was racing as I made my way to the car. Part of me worried Ryder would catch me and the other part of me couldn’t help but imagine that the gator his Granny fought with was lurking somewhere close by. It would be just my luck to get eaten by a gator just about the time I found the courage to face what was going on in my life.

              Once I was in the car, I held my breath until I was off the dirt roads and back on the main one that led to New Orleans. I was glad I’d paid attention when Ryder brought me out here so that I at least knew how to get back to town. There was one stop I had to make on the way. As we’d passed through the little town of Houmas the day before, something had caught my eye. It was a payphone. It was the first one I’d seen, or at least noticed, since I’d been in the United States. It sat at the edge of a small convenience store attached to a gas station. I deposited my coins and dialed the now familiar number.

              “Biology lab this is TA Brewster.”

              “Yes, hello. Is Aleks Melua in yet?”

              “Yes, he’s here. One moment please.” I heard the student put the phone down and call for Aleks. A few minutes later he came on the line. The sound of his voice was one of the few things left in my life that comforted me. Aleks was always my favorite. He was always the good one.

              “This is Aleks.”

              “Aleks, it’s Aishe.”

              He swiftly switched to Russian. In our language, he said, “Where are you?”

He sounded worried and I felt bad.

              “I’m headed back to New Orleans. Can you meet me in about an hour?”

              “Headed back from where? The garage was blown up at the mansion yesterday. They said one person was dead, but they didn’t release the name. I thought it was you, Aishe! Why didn’t you call me?”

              “I’m sorry. It’s a long story, but the bodyguard took me out of there, and when we got to the motel I was going to stay at, his men were already there. They shot him, Aleks.”

              “They killed him?”

              “No, he’s okay, but they could have. The dead man at the mansion was Charles. He was my friend. I can’t put people at risk any longer. I have to leave here and go far away.”

              “Go where?”

              “I’m not sure yet. I’ll start just by getting on a train, but can you meet me at the train station with the papers?” Aleks had found someone who would make me a fake U.S. birth certificate and social security card. The plan was to wait until all other options were exhausted because I was still working on my accent. I felt like we were in that place, and as far as my accent, I’d just have to work harder.

“Are you ready for that, Aishe? A life alone and on the run. How will you support yourself?”

              “I’ll do what I have to, Aleks.”

              “What? Like Mom did?” I didn’t answer him. Just the fact that he would ask was insulting to me. Yet, at the same time, although I couldn’t imagine myself as a prostitute, I knew somewhere deep down that if that was what it took to protect the people I loved, I would do it. “This is a bad plan, Aishe. It’s time we go to the police.”

              “No! You know we can’t do that. If we do that, I will go back to Russia and to prison and he wins. Think about it, Aleks. The police will charge me, not him.”

              “Fine, I won’t call the police but don’t run. You can stay here with us. Let’s figure this out together.”

              “I can’t come there and put your family at risk. I have to go, Aleks. Ryder will be looking for me soon. I have to be far from here. Now that I think about it, I should just have you send me the papers once I’m settled. I don’t want you here in case they show up.”

“I don’t want you there if they show up. That mansion was supposed to be a safe place for you with all of that security and look what happened there. Imagine being out there alone without anyone to protect you!”

“The mansion was good for a while. It took him a long time to find me. As far as taking care of myself, I’ll just have to learn. I have to go now. I’ll be in touch when I get to a place where you can send me the papers. I love you.” He was still talking when I hung up. I pretended I didn’t hear him. He was asking me how I intended to manage being so far from the baby. At least here I had the chance to see her. The thing was that, although I felt like my heart was breaking, I finally realized I needed to put much more distance between her and myself in order to protect her. I stood there for a few minutes until I had the strength to get back in the car and finish the trek to New Orleans.

Once I was there, I parked Ryder’s car in the parking lot of the train station and made my way inside. My paranoia was working overtime. Every man I saw in a suit looked menacing to me. I felt like everyone was watching me and I was on the verge of an anxiety attack. My only hope was that if they were here, they wouldn’t try anything in such a crowded place. I still wasn’t sure where I was going. I didn’t have much money, so my options were limited. I got in line at the ticket counter with the intentions of simply buying a ticket for the furthest destination I could afford.

              “Where are you going?” the whisper of a man’s voice so close to my ear nearly sent me crawling out of my own skin. I pretended I didn’t hear him, but everything inside of me was shaking. “Listen carefully, Alicia. My name is Blake. We’ve only met once. I work with Ryder. I’m here to help you.”

              I chanced a glance up at him. He was a big man like Ryder but much more intimidating. His features were all hard lines, as if he’d been carved out of stone. His green eyes were dark and almost expressionless, and his short blonde hair would have made him look like a soldier, even if he hadn’t been dressed in army fatigues. The one time I’d met Blake, Ryder had been in the room, so I’d paid little attention to him. All I really remembered was a big man in a suit with a really deep voice. “I don’t need help,” I whispered back. “Thank you.”

              He stepped even closer. I could feel him against my back. If I stepped forward, I’d be up against the stranger in front of me though, so I stayed put. “Alicia, I followed you through the GPS Ryder and I have on all of our company cars. I don’t know how your friends found you, but if you glance around, you’ll see three men in expensive black suits that stick out like sore thumbs in a place like this. I’m guessing they’re here for you, and I’m also guessing that you’d rather come with me than go with them.”

              I felt tears stinging the corners of my eyes. How did they find me? It had to be the phone call to Aleks. I never called his house or his cell phone. We’d both thought it would be too much for them to track the university number. Once again I’d underestimated the power that my ex-husband possessed. “What do you want me to do?” I whispered to Blake in a shaky voice.

              “Just keep moving forward.” I did as he told me because I didn’t know what else to do. The alternative was to try and run, and if these men in suits were here for me, I wouldn’t get far. I felt like my knees would give out before I reached the counter. When it was my turn, Blake took over before I had a chance to speak. “My sister and I will take two tickets to Gulfport,” he said. The girl behind the counter hadn’t smiled once since I’d gotten in line. That changed as soon as she saw Blake. A smile as radiant as the sun lit up her face.

              “Of course, sir,” she said. “Are you on a leave?”

              “Yes, ma’am,” he said in his smooth, deep, Louisiana accent. I actually think he emphasized it a bit. “Home from the Middle East to spend some time with my family.”

              Her fingers were moving slowly across the keys of the computer in front of her. Either Blake made her nervous, or she was just trying to keep him there as long as she could. “Can I see your IDs?”

              I looked up at Blake in a panic. I hadn’t thought about needing identification to get on a train. He didn’t look worried. He winked at me and then took out his driver’s license and some kind of military I.D. and lay them down on the counter. Leaning in as close as he could to the bars that separated us from the smitten girl he said, “My sister forgot her I.D.; I don’t suppose it would be possible for you to make a small exception for us just this once? Our parents are expecting us. They have a whole spread laid out by now I’m sure, and I’ll just bet Mom invited the whole neighborhood. I’ve been gone for a while.”

              The girl looked torn. It was obvious she wanted to do this for him, but she didn’t want to break the rules. Blake smiled bigger. It completely changed his face from hard and intimidating to magazine model. I hadn’t even noticed how hot he was until that very moment. Apparently the girl behind the counter noticed, too. She looked around as she was typing his information in to make sure no one was watching, and then she looked at me and said, “What’s your name?”

              “Alicia Donovan,” he said before I had a chance to say anything. He smiled again and actually batted his long eyelashes at her. If I wasn’t such a bundle of nerves, it would have been comical.

              She finished typing and printed out the tickets. Instead of letting them slide down in the slot, she held onto them and his I.D., so Blake had to take them out of her hand. He let his fingers brush against hers as he did. “Thank you…”