Sacrificing Sloan (Sloan Series Book 3) (16 page)

Boyd had my grabbed my hand so tight I couldn’t move now, and I couldn’t let go of the tree to make Sloan back up. “Sloan, please. Get back. You’ll fall.”

“I can’t let him die.”

“Why? He deserves it!”

“Because it’ll kill you!” Her voice echoed through the forest, and it echoed in my soul. Tears streamed down her face. “It’ll kill you, Aaron.” Her voice hiccupped, and for the first time since she’d found me, I actually looked at her.

She was terrified.

She was soaked. Covered in mud. Blue and purple bags under her eyes. That spark, the spark I loved so much, was missing from her. She was scared for me.

“It won’t kill me to watch him die.” I tried to reassure her. I’d spent way too much time with him for the last few days to even worry about things like that. I knew what kind of person he was, and I knew he didn’t need to live. My conscience was clear, at least that’s what I tried to tell myself.

I still had this nagging feeling, somewhere in my chest, that I was doing the wrong thing. One, I had never watched someone die before, much less die because of something I did. And two, I’d joked with Boyd. I’d talked to him. Yeah, I hated him, but… I saw something in him… at one time… that made me sort of think, under different circumstances—circumstances that would never come—we could have possibly been friends.

He slid, and without thinking, I grabbed for him. My hand wrapped around his wrist, and I held on tight. It wasn’t easy. The rain made our hands incredibly slick, but for Sloan I would, even though I very much didn’t want to. Not really.

“He hurt you, Sloan.” I tried to make her see my way of thinking. “If we let him go, he’ll do it again.”

“You promised!” Boyd screamed at me. His legs kicked in the air, but didn’t connect with anything. What it did do was make him harder to hold on to.

“Shut up!” I screamed back. “I used you, Boyd. I needed you to take me back to the main road and then what? Do you honestly think I’d let you go? You hurt my girlfriend. You shot my brother. Who knows how he is?”

“He’s fine.” Sloan told me. “He’s fine, Aaron. He’s out here. Looking for you. He’s with Mackenzie. I told you that!”

“Aaron! I can’t hold on much longer…. Please… please… I’m begging you.” When faced with death, Boyd really didn’t want to go through with it. I supposed most people didn’t. “I’ll do anything. I’ll turn myself in. I just…” he cringed. It was a long fall with a very hard ending. “Please. I’ll give you anything you want.”

“Can you take away what you did to Sloan?” I had to fight to keep from dropping him then and there. But Sloan was watching… Sloan just had to show up at the wrong time. “Can you take back what you did to my brother?”

“Can you take back all of your past sins?” Boyd countered, which was a gutsy move since I could have easily let go again. This time, his grip was so weak, there was no way he could hold on if I did.

“I’ve never done what you did.” I spat back.

“No… but you’ve done things, haven’t you? Things you wish you hadn’t. Things that you’d do anything to make better and forget. The thing is, not everyone knows your sins. Not even Sloan. Would she still look at you like that if she knew the truth about you?”

There was no way he knew anything about my past. No way. And there was no way Sloan would ever know. I’d never done anything like Boyd—but he wasn’t wrong. Everyone had something, or some “things” in life that you wish you hadn’t done. Everyone. Even me.

“Pull him up, Aaron.” Sloan pleaded. “I hate him more than anyone else in the world. I’m not worried about him. I’m worried about you, and what it’ll do for you.” Her fingers traced my cheek, and I couldn’t help it. I closed my eyes and leaned into her. It had been too long since I’d felt her touch. I knew that if I let him fall, she’d be upset with me and she might not want to be around me anymore. I couldn’t have that. Boyd wasn’t worth that.

My soul wasn’t worth that.

No matter what I thought—I knew—there was no way I could ever actually let him go.

The rain had other ideas.

Boyd's grip weakened, and for a second, I wasn’t holding on. I reached down further and caught him before he was too far gone. “I’m going to pull you up. Got it.”

He smiled. Really smiled at me. “Thank you! Thank you, Aaron!”

“Don’t thank me.” I grumbled. “Okay, you have to listen. Quit kicking, and I’ll pull you up. Sloan, hold onto me and keep me from sliding down, too, okay?”

Without hesitation, she moved to my side and put one hand on my shoulder and the other in the waist of my pants. Not the way I had thought this would happen, but whatever.

“Ready, Boyd? Hold on, and I’ll pull.”

He did.

And I did.

Boyd grabbed the ground at the top of the cliff and pulled up. I felt myself sliding, but I kept going. I didn’t want to fall over. Boyd couldn’t fall over. Sloan wouldn’t forgive me.

I was out of breath by the time Boyd was nearly up, and when he looked secure, we rested just a bit. Boyd leaned his head on the ground and dug his fingers in the mud. I had my hand under his arm to pull him the rest of the way up, when we had gotten some energy back. The irony of where we were didn’t get past me.

“Sloan? Are you still here?” Boyd breathed heavily from how hard we’d worked to get him back up.

Sloan looked at me with a raised brow. “He’s blind.” I told her.

“For real, this time?”

“Yeah.” I laughed a bit, trying my best to catch my breath, so we could get this over with.

“I need to tell you something, Sloan,” Boyd went on, and I gritted my teeth, worrying about what in the world he’d tell her. I still had my hand under him, supporting him and keeping him from falling, so I could always just let go…

“I’m sorry, Sloan.” It totally surprised me. My grip eased. “Believe me. I’m incredibly sorry.”

I answered, before Sloan could. “Come on. Let’s get you all the way up here.”

I pulled.

He slipped.

Before I could grab him, he was gone.

I watched as he fell.

I watched as he yelled for me to help him.

I couldn’t do anything, except shield Sloan’s eyes when Boyd hit the rocks.

A river of blood flowed out from under him.

His eyes were open. Void. Lifeless.

Dark, oozing blood ran from his mouth.

I hadn’t held on.

I hadn’t saved him.

I’d let him die.

I held Sloan to keep her from seeing, but she moved me out of the way and screamed Boyd’s name. She begged him to move, to talk to her, something.

Nothing.

I knew.

Even if she didn’t.

There was no way he could have survived that fall.

Boyd was dead.

And I wasn’t sure how I felt about that.

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

Sloan

Time: Stood still

T
HIS WASN’T HAPPENING.

I wasn’t staring down at Boyd crumpled on the rocks.

I wasn’t behind held back by Aaron.

I wasn’t screaming Boyd’s name.

But I was.

I didn’t want Boyd to be dead, except I sort of did. Part of me was glad to look down and see him lying there, not moving, not talking. I knew he would never be able to hurt me again.

Except he was.

“Sloan, shhhhh…. Shhhh. Come on. Don’t look.” Aaron whispered in my ear. He pulled me to him and tried to keep me from looking, but I couldn’t look away.

I think I was in shock. I felt everything. But I felt entirely numb. It was strange. I wanted to wrap my arms around Aaron and hold him tight. My arms wouldn’t move. I couldn’t move. All I could do was sit and watch Boyd, praying for him to move.

Aaron’s big hands held onto my arms, and he gently pulled me back. He moved me, so I was facing him and not Boyd. “Look at me, Sloan.”

I did. And when I did, I fell into his arms. “Aaron.” I cried, and hugged him tighter than I’d ever held anyone in my life. He was there. He was real. He wasn’t going anywhere. He wasn’t dead. I knew he was okay. But he was hurt.

I pulled away long enough to look him over. He looked pretty worse for wear. His hair was stuck to his head. His clothes were muddy, though mine were, too. And his leg, oh his leg, was contorted at a very unpleasant angle.

“Hey,” he smiled, when it became pretty clear I wasn’t going to freak out. Not yet anyway.

“Hey.” I said back and pointed to his leg.

He shrugged. “Could be worse. Mr. Lawrence fixed it up for me the best he could.”

“Mr. Lawrence. What happened to him? How did he die?”

“I’m not sure. Heart attack maybe. He’s up there on the hill.” Aaron pointed, and I think we both saw them at the same time.

The search party.

Aaron looked at me, and I looked at him. We were happy to be rescued, but it was a bit too late for Boyd.

I bit my lip and held onto Aaron’s hand, determined to never let it go. “Over here!” I yelled and waved my free hand until someone in the search party saw me.

Over there! By the ledge. Come on!

I heard their shouts coming toward me, and I felt relief. It was over. It was all over. Boyd was dead. My life could go on. I had Aaron. Everything would be fine.

How naïve I was.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

Aaron

5:34 PM

I
MADE SURE
S
LOAN WAS OUT
of my cubicle in the emergency room before I answered any police questions. The less she knew, the better. She kept saying how it was over… how it was over. I hoped it was over, but I knew it wouldn’t be so easy, from the look the first officer gave me when he looked over the cliff and saw Boyd’s body lying down there.

If they thought it was on purpose, well… it wasn’t. Not entirely. Not… well, it sort of was. I couldn’t catch him at the end, but I didn’t have to let him dangle for as long as I did. I could have—should have—brought him up sooner, but I didn’t.

I’d have to live with that.

Detective Morgan pulled up a chair next to my bed and got out her notepad. “Alright, Mr. Hunter. Start at the beginning.”

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

Sloan

5:34 PM

T
HERE ARE MOMENTS WHEN TIME STOPS
—when life stands still—when air stops flowing in and out of lungs and a person’s mind can’t comprehend what’s happened.

Come on… don’t do this to me.

The machines beeped.

The clock ticked.

Voices filtered through the hospital walls.

Please wake up… please don’t die.

Silence.

Honestly, I didn’t know she had been so bad off. I knew Mackenzie was sick, but I didn’t know how sick, until I got to the hospital with Aaron. They took him one way— Ray right behind him. And ushered me a different way—all the while, Ray screamed at me to “take care of her.”

I assumed he meant Mackenzie, but man, I didn’t expect this.

Apparently, from what I gathered, Mackenzie had collapsed on the way back to her car, and Ray had to carry her. He got her to the car and drove her to the hospital, despite the head injury and the strict “do not drive” doctor’s orders.

Once there, the doctors determined she had bronchitis and pneumonia, all brought on by the flu.

The nurses didn’t want me in the room with her, but I wouldn’t listen. They stopped trying to keep me out. It was probably stupid, but I didn’t care. Mackenzie needed someone.

Finally, the doctor said I could stay until her mom and dad got there. I didn’t know how long it would take, but I knew I had to pray hard until they did.

I had neglected Mackenzie for months—not really neglected, but I didn’t really focus on her that much. It was all about me. All about what I was going through and Mackenzie, being awesome, went along with it. She never complained. Never talked about her problems. I didn’t even know she liked Ray until it was painfully obvious.

Mackenzie was the best friend anyone could ever ask for. And I sure didn’t deserve her.

“Sloan…” I knew that voice. I stood when I heard it and, with tears in my eyes, ran into Mrs. Woodard’s arms. “How is she?”

I had to get myself together and stop freaking out, if I could explain exactly what happened to her mom. Mr. Woodard gasped when he walked in the door. He didn’t stop to talk to me. He went straight over and grabbed Mackenzie’s hand. Mackenzie got her red hair from him, but she looked like her mom in the face.

“I feel awful! I didn’t even know she was sick. I mean. I knew she was here and upset over that boy she likes, but I didn’t know… I didn’t know.” Her mom hiccupped a sob.

“Martha. Crying won’t fix anything.” Mackenzie’s father said sternly. “We have to be here for our daughter right now. Sloan.” He didn’t look at me. “Thank you for staying with her until we got here, but you can leave now. It is a family affair.”

“But…”

“It is a family… affair.” He pronounced each word slowly, so I understood. He didn’t want me here. He blamed me for Mackenzie’s situation, and I didn’t blame him. I hurt everyone I cared about, in one way or another. Ray had been shot. Aaron nearly died. Boyd did die. Mackenzie was hanging on in critical condition.

I only had a few scratches on me.

It wasn’t fair.

Life wasn’t fair.

I tried to smile at Mrs. Woodard, who ran her fingers through my muddy hair and nodded at me. She didn’t blame me, I could tell. But she should have. If I hadn’t left that note for Mackenzie, she never would have been out in the woods looking for Ray. That was what he wanted: for her to be safe. Like always, my brilliant plans didn’t pan out the way I wanted.

I went to the emergency room entrance’ just as my mother walked in the door. She ran to me, and I fell into her arms. It felt so good to be held by her. She took me to the couches, and for the first time in what seemed like forever, I let go. I cried so hard it shook us both, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I couldn’t deal with any of this anymore. My heart was broken, and I couldn’t fix it.

While I cried, my mother, who I’d never heard talk to God in her life, whispered prayers.