Santa Fe Woman (34 page)

“I’ve been thinking about it.”

“No, you can’t leave.” She came up and took his hand and pulled at him. “I don’t want you to leave, Chad.”

“Well, I don’t want to leave so much, but I’ve got other things to do.”

Carleen stared at him for a minute. “You’d be too old for me by the time I’m old enough to marry, but you can marry Jori.”

“You are the nosiest young woman I ever saw! Jori is a fine lady, and I’m a mule skinner and a mountain man. She would never marry me.”

“Yes, she would,” Carleen nodded emphatically. “She’s in love with you.”

“Don’t be foolish!”

“She is. It says so right here.” She opened a small book that she had brought with her and read a line out. “‘I love Chad so much, but he doesn’t care for me. That’s obvious.’ She wrote that yesterday. See the date?”

“Carleen, this is Jori’s journal!”

“I know it. I read it all the time, but she doesn’t know it. I brought it to show to you because you need to know she loves you. Now, read that.”

Against his better judgment Rocklin took the book. He felt a sharp twinge of guilt, but his curiosity overcame his scruples. He began to read and for several minutes stood stock-still. Then he
closed the book and looked down at Carleen, who was watching him expectantly. “I guess I see what you mean, Carleen.”

* * *

JORI HEARD ROCKLIN’S STEPS. Their family had rented a house on the edge of town, and she thought it was Mark or her father returning. The knock on the door startled her, and she muttered, “Who can that be?” When she opened the door, she found Rocklin standing there. He took his hat off and said, “Hello, Jori, can I come in?”

“Why—of course. Come on in.”

As soon as he was inside, Jori turned to him. Her lips were drawn together into a firm line. She said very stiffly, “I understand you’re leaving for prospecting or something.”

“Well, that was on my mind.”

“I suppose you came to say good-bye.”

“Well, that was my intention, but I’ve been thinking. It’s a dangerous thing for a man to walk away from a situation.”

Jori stared at him. “What do you mean?”

“I can look back at two times in my life when I had a chance to do something and instead of doing them I just walked away.”

“Were they women that you walked away from?”

“One of them was. I was only nineteen. What did I know?”

Jori wanted to ask about the woman, but she was upset and asked merely, “What was the other time?”

“I was at a revival meeting when I was sixteen. God spoke to my heart that day, and I should have been saved. Instead I got up and ran out. I ran from God for a long time. That was a big mistake. I walked away from the best thing in life.”

“I’m sorry to hear it.”

He took a deep breath and said, “Jori, I can’t walk away because it would ruin your life.”

“Ruin
my
life! What are you talking about?”

“You love me so much, Jori, that you’d never get over it if I left. You’d wind up an old maid and be miserable.”

“Why, you insufferable—” Jori stuttered and could not think of a thing to say that would put him in his place. “I think I could survive the loss if you left. What makes you think such a thing?”

“It says so right here.”

She had not seen the object Rocklin had been carrying in his hand. When he held it up, she gasped, “That’s my journal!”

“Yes, I’ve been reading how much you love me here. It says right here, ‘I love Chad so much I don’t even know how to put it into words, but he’s the only man I’ve ever loved or ever will.’”

“You give me that!” Jori grabbed the journal, her face flaming. “I know where you got this. Carleen stole it and gave it to you!”

“Yes, she did.” He moved forward, saying, “I’m sorry. It’s a bad thing to read a private writing like that, but it made me see something.”

“What did it make you see?”

“That you care for me. I didn’t think you could, not like I love you, Jori.” He reached forward and saw the fire and the spirit in the soft depth of her. There was a sweetness in her and a gentleness and a goodness. She was rich in a way a woman should be rich, and he said quietly, “I don’t know when I first fell in love with you, but I know I do.” He pulled her into his arms and kissed her. Her mouth was firm when he touched it, but the firmness dissolved and he felt the goodness of her. Old hungers suddenly rose in him. It was like falling into a softness, and he held her, unwilling to turn her loose. He felt her lips returning his caress, and, as he kissed her, it was as if she was saying what she had
written in her journal. The feeling of a deep need satisfied ran through him.

“I don’t keep a journal, Jori, not on paper, but if I did, I’d write in it, ‘There’s only one woman in the world for me. She’s beautiful and true as steel. If I don’t have her, I’ll be miserable for the rest of my life. But if she’ll marry me, I’ll have the world right here in my arms.’”

“Oh, Chad, do you mean it?” Jori dropped the journal and put her arms around his neck. He kissed her again, and then suddenly a voice broke in.

“You see, Chad, I told you she was in love with you.”

“You—you varmint!” Jori screeched. She pulled away from Rocklin and made a wild grab at Carleen, but Rocklin beat her to it. He snatched the young girl up and put his face against hers.

“Why, I can’t let you do it, Jori. She’s a favorite of mine, you see.”

Jori watched as Carleen smiled and put her hand on Rocklin’s cheek. “You need to shave, Chad. Your whiskers hurt.” She turned and said, “I want you to make him shave every day after he marries you, Jori.”

And then Jori laughed—a full, free laughter that came from somewhere deep in her heart. She came over and put her arms around the two of them, and then she said, “Well, it’ll take both of us to raise him, Carleen, but we can do it together.”

The End