Saving Georgia (13 page)

“Are you wanting me to walk you to your seat, or are you going to finally release my arm there sweetheart?” Shane asks me, clasping him hand on top of my arm.

“Oh, right. Sorry.” I look up into those gorgeous eyes. My heart started to pace and I can feel the heat pooling into the apples of my cheeks.
Why must I be so pale skinned? I live in the South for Pete’s sake! Can’t I have a golden tan and hide my blushing tendencies under layers of perfectly applied bronzer like every other girl in this school?

I hugged my best friend and scampered into my Lit. Class and took my seat. I found myself staring out the window more often than not, and I was not paying the least bit of attention to the lecture about Huxley and the book I had just spent my splendid morning reading. If by any grace, the teacher won’t call on me. How could I possibly love more than one person? How is this fair to anyone? The only earthly thing to believe in while being alive is love; however love itself is more like hell on earth. Romeo and Juliet died for it and it was nothing more than a mere weekend tryst. Why people willingly go through this type of crap is beyond me. I cannot fathom it, but here it is before me – two boys willingly asking me to love them, and yet I do love them both. One my love is more endlessly than the other, and one who causes my body is act in such a way that it will forever give me away. This is the stuff they should be teaching in class, and how to balance a checkbook instead of a fictional utopia world.

Much to my lack of surprise, the rest of my day pretty much was in an un-functional blur. I hadn’t stopped thinking about that kiss I had with Shane, and how it made me feel so … replete. The only thing that got me to stop thinking about that kiss, or the way that Jason was about to cry thinking that something was wrong with me, was the thought that my car would be ready today. Shane and I would work on it together, or I would do school work while he would work on it, and then I start thinking about that kiss all over again. I’m a riddled mess.

At the end of the day I was waiting for Shane outside the gym. Jenn saw me and made a quick dash for me.

“Georgy!”, she squeals and waves.

“Jenn, what’s up?” I turn to look up at her. I was sitting leaning against the back wheel of Shane’s truck.

“Do you know that everyone is talking about you?” She asks, taking a seat next to me.

“No. And why are you telling me this? You know how I feel about that gossip-drama stuff.” I huff, mindlessly doodling in my book.

“Because everyone thinks you’re the new hot girl! You’re the new Harper Kelly!” Jenn laughs.

“Why? Because I have something going on with Jason and or Shane?” I mutter.

“Maybe, or maybe because you’re finally showing more confidence and dolling your sweet butt up from time to time, showing the world what you got people are taking notice!” Jenn huffs back at me, firmly shoving me with her shoulder.

“Maybe… Either way it’s just idle gossip. People can think what they want but regardless my life just kind of sucks.” I pout, and give an exasperated sigh.

“Georgy?” Jenn asks me so quietly that I can barely hear her. “What is going on?”

“I just…. I don’t…” I start, rubbing the bridge of my nose, and squinting my eyes. How do I explain something I don’t understand myself to someone else? “I’m just in this predicament that either decision hurts someone I just don’t want to hurt. I don’t know if I love Jason, or I just want to love Jason. I know he feels something for me, and I know I feel something, what that something is I have no clue, but it’s there. And then there is Shane who just … I love him. He takes my breath away and he is exactly what I need in my life, but I am such a screw up and filled with so many issues I’d be doing him a favor by not being in love with him.” I exhale deeply, and my chest instantly feels lighter.

“I see. So, then don’t make a choice. Not yet, but you will have to someday. This isn’t like picking out what’s for dinner; this doesn’t need to be decided now.” Jenn wraps her arm over my shoulders.

“I know, but love just sucks. It’s a messy war zone, full of battles and bloodshed. In the end, no one stands the victor.” I mutter.

“Not true!” Jenn yells at me. “Look at my parents. They have a great marriage.”

“That’s true. But look at my mother; she married that monster.”

“But before she married that God awful… thing… she married your dad. And from what my parents tell us they were so happy and in love and they were ecstatic when they found out they were having you and everything was perfect.” Jenn croons, rocking me back and forth.

“Yeah, but then he died and she was broken and then
he
happened” I seethed at the word he, to make my point more valid, “and she said she loved him.”

“I think she was just lonely. I don’t think she knew what was going to happen. If she did, I’m quite sure it wouldn’t have happened. She wouldn’t have let him anywhere near you.” Jenn argues, trying to sound like the comforting big sister.

“I just don’t know, I just almost want to give up on the notion altogether.” I whisper under my breath, almost hoping she doesn’t hear me.

“You hush your mouth lady!” Jenn spits out like hellfire. “The one thing I remember most from our childhood about your mother is her teaching us, teaching you over and over again about how important and special love is. If you dare give that up, give up hope and trust in the one thing that makes this life worth living for, you yourself are failing your mother. And even worse, you’re failing God.” Jenn almost screams. She was fuming.

Ouch
. That hurt, but she had a point and I think that was something I needed to hear. I won’t give up hope, not just yet. “OK. You’re right. You win.”

“I know. I knew you’d see it my way.” Jenn smiled.

“How did you know that?” I ask.

“Your doodles, silly. It’s just Shane and Jason’s names scribbled all over your notebook.” Jenn gleams standing up, and helping to pull me to my feet.

“Well crap.” I said, closing my notebook, not realizing that was what I was going.

“Your calligraphy is astounding, I must say.” Jenn jokes with me, tossing her hip into mine.

“There’s the two most gorgeous girls in Johnston County!” I hear from behind us. I look over my shoulder and of course, there is Shane. My heart started racing and my skin was hyper alert. T
his normally just happens with Jason, what the crap?
My body is all confused.
“Sweetheart, you ready? I want to get an early start.” Shane asks me, swinging his backpack in the bed of the truck. He comes over, grabs mine and puts it back there as well. He opens the door, and waits for an answer.

“Yeah, I’m good. Let’s get going.” I smile, “See you at home Jenn?” I ask, looking back at my friend before I jump completely in the cab of the truck.

“Yes ma’am.” Jenn waves off. “I got to find Nick!” She shouted, waving back and running off to the back of the gym. Shane closes my door, and I watch her run over with a big smile, knowing she is going to find him in the field for practice. Nick is so good to Jenn. It makes me so happy.

“Ready, woman?” Shane asks, turning the ignition over.

“Yes sir!” I squeal, looking over at Shane, and him in his trucker hat is looking mighty fine today. He has his John Deer green shirt on, and some nicely fitted jeans. Oh sweet lord, I’m checking out my best friend. I quickly look away and hope he doesn’t notice me blushing. Some Luke Bryan comes on the radio and I knew that he would sing along and I wouldn’t hold any unwanted attention. Sweet Jesus, thank you Lord!

We finally pulled up the long gravel drive to Shane’s house. The old place just feels like home. His mother is bent over in the garden, waving at us as we pull in. We pulled up to the shop and the parts were all laid out. Elsie was outside under the hot Carolina sun. I can feel the heat radiating off her body. I love that freaking car. Shane jumped out, and I let myself out as he was walking to open my door. I can see the ping of disappointment that I didn’t wait. He will get over it. He hopped up on the wheel fender and grabbed our bags out the truck bed. His mom got up and walked into the house after a quick hello. I mustered my way into the shade of the open shop doors, and sat down with my book for lit class. After about 10 minutes, Mrs. Dalton emerged with two tall ice cold glasses of sweet tea and some light sandwiches. It was delightful.

“Thanks mom.” Shane said, giving his mom a quick peck on the cheek.

“Thank you so much, Mrs. Dalton.” I smile up to the wonderful woman.

The radio was constantly blaring in the background, and I didn’t mind. I sang right along, doing my homework – or at least attempting to. Shane’s sweat soaked t-shirt kept riding up, showing off his perfectly etched body with his tan magnifying ever taught muscle line, emphasizing the defined v right below his abdomen. The sweat was rolling right off his body, and eventually he just took the shirt off and I swear the heat in the shop went up at least 5 degrees. His shirt now became a sweat rag. I bit my lip watching him; watching each delicious move that cowboy made.

“Georgy.” Shane called out to me.

“Huh?” I said, blinking. I hope he didn’t catch me checking him out.

“I found the issue and I’m a bit concerned sweetheart.” He frowns, pulling his head out from under the hood.

“Oh?”
Did he always call me sweetheart? I think so. I love it when he calls me that. It’s such a sweet and endearing term. Not just that, but it’s a word that you have to mean to say since there is no other word like it, and it’s longer which means that you have to put effort into it. It’s not honey or hun, it’s not baby or sweetie, it’s sweetheart. It’s unmistakable.

“Yeah, see this?” He is holding up a long, snake like piece of rubber.

“Yes.”

“This is your alternator belt. It should make a full circle or oval if you will. But see here” he says pointing to the break, “it’s cut, not frayed. Most times it’ll break from wearing out, but this looks almost new and the cut is clean no uneven lines or nothin’.” He says, wiping his forehead with the balled up John Deere shirt, and my heart starts racing. Not because of what he is saying, because that is scary, but because of how much I just want to throw myself at him right now.

“Have you let anyone near your car?” Shane stalks towards me.

“No. Everything was fine, and then last night leaving work… well you know the story. But, I will tell you it did feel off like something was creeping me out but I haven’t a clue as to what it was. I chocked it up to my imagination running away on me.”

“I see. Well, for the next little bit here, I want you to keep in contact with me OK?”

“Uh huh” I swallow hard, looking into his eyes. I can feel the chemistry radiating between us. I can feel that sweet tug in my lower belly.

“Georgia,” Shane starts, and I can see him looking down at my mouth, and I am looking up at his.

“Yes, Shane?” I whisper. My chest is rising and falling rapidly and I know he can tell. My breath is hitched and quickened.

“Beautiful, could you toss this away for me?” He says after a long pause.

I blinked, and then looked him in the eye. Stunned, my mouth dropped open. Quickly, and very forcefully Shane wrapped his arms around my waist and he suckled on my lower lip. My initial gasp quickly turned into a soft moan. Shane’s sweat soaked body was slick and I had a hard time holding myself against him. He quickly picked me up and lowered me to the floor of the shop, which was surprisingly cool. His hand grabbed the back of my thigh and he lifted it to position himself between my legs. I can feel his want for me, his urgency and I felt my body responding to his, reciprocating every need of his, and my flesh wanted to obey to his every touch.

“Shane,” I gasp against his lips.

“Georgia.” He pants, lowering his forehead on top of mine. His hands are skimming the skin beneath my shirt, caressing my abdomen back and forth. “You know everything about me, except for that level… this level of intimacy that we are teetering on here. I want to know that about you and more than anything I want you to know that about me too.” He says, with his eyes closed and his hand cradling my cheek.

“Shane, please” I beg, arching my back, longing for his lips on mine. His hand rests on top on my heart, and I can feel his ragged breathing against my mouth. He kisses me deeply.

“I can’t. I won’t.” He says, putting his weight on his forearms on either side of my head. “Not until I know you’re mine, officially mine.”

Whoa, what? Last time I checked I was teetering on the verge of adulthood , not straddling the doggone line.

“Shane. We’re young, and I’m not sure what love is exactly, or what it means to be in it. And I can’t just rip Jason’s heart out. I need to figure this out for myself. Besides, I’m not just going to
give
it away you know.”

“I know that. In fact, I’m counting on it.” Shane hold my stare, looking down on me. His eyes are heady and full of want and passion.

What does he mean by that? He’s counting on me to stay a virgin? I don’t think that is any of his business.

“What?” I ask him, baffled and befuddled.

“You shouldn’t be with just anyone. I know you are still a virgin, you’ve told me. Let me ask you this, why are you still holding onto it?” He asks me in a very soft and serious tone, nuzzling his face deep into my neck.