Scars of the Future (5 page)

Chapter Five

Monday morning I was antsy to leave the apartment. I had been trying to let Mom settle in to her new home and was missing her a lot. I decided to head on over to the house after the apartment felt suffocating and I made a mental list of things that needed to be done. Mom hadn’t updated the house since Dad had died, and I wanted to spruce it up. Fresh paint and new carpet were high on my list of priorities, as well as de-cluttering. I spent the morning and most of the afternoon sorting through things to keep and things to donate.

I opened up a file that was labeled ‘Amanda College’ and let out a long breath when I saw what was in it. Inside were all of my college acceptance letters. My mom had apparently saved every single one. I shuffled through them, reading the names one by one- Stanford, Columbia, Duke, Vanderbilt, Berkley, Davis, and several more. The very last one in the pile stared at me with its plain, but stated, font: Yale.

My father and I had decided on Yale when I was in middle school, and it was all we talked about from then on out. He used to say that I had an uncanny ability to win an argument and a passion to help those who needed it. From there, the desire for being a lawyer had been born.

I could have been at Yale right that very moment, but the tiny pang of sadness didn’t come like it usually did. Yale was a chapter of my life that I had closed long ago, but the news of the baby had been when I had nailed it shut. The excitement of motherhood had taken over, and I found myself daydreaming of a life where I spent my evenings chasing a little child in the backyard. Some of those daydreams even involved Matt, but I had to tamp those down. The minute I had decided I could be a mom I knew I had made a huge mistake pushing Matt away. I had been so convinced that I couldn’t give him the family he wanted and when it turned out I could, unintentionally, it was too late. I had really messed up.

I shoved the letters back into the file and dropped them in the ‘keep’ box before moving on. The progress I made was decent, and I had quite a few boxes full of items when my phone rang.

“Hey Mads,” I greeted as I flipped through an old photo album I’d found in the attic.

“Amanda.” Maddie’s voice sounded panicked and I immediately closed the book in my hand.

“What’s wrong?”

She inhaled sharply. “Mom just called. David’s in the hospital. Apparently he was shot and it’s not good. Sydney was there when he was brought in and Mom says she’s not doing too well.”

“I’m on my way right now,” I said hurriedly as I grabbed my purse and keys off the table.

“Josh and I are too, but you’ll probably beat us there. Just drive safe.”

I ended the call and raced over to the hospital where Sydney had been promoted to a full-time Business Administrator. This was the same hospital that Linda and Craig worked and I was really thankful that they could be with Sydney almost immediately.

I stopped by the desk in the emergency room and almost accosted the young girl who was standing there.

“David Bradley was brought in. Where would I go to wait for him?”

She looked at me with a sad expression. “Are you one of Sydney’s friends?”

“Yeah,” I said as I nodded quickly. “Where is she?”

“The third floor is where the operating rooms are. She should be in the waiting area.”

I thanked her as I darted towards the elevator. It seemed to move in slow motion before finally coming to a stop on the third floor. I pushed through the doors before they were open completely and found the waiting area easily. It was packed full of police officers and other random people, all who seemed to be there for David. I spotted Sydney quickly. She was sitting in a chair between Linda and David’s sister, Sarah, her face blank as she stared at nothing. Her eyes and nose were both red from crying, and my heart immediately broke for my friend.

“Syd,” I said quietly as I crouched in front of her.

“Amanda.” Her voice broke when she said my name and I wrapped her in my arms as she cried. I rubbed my hand down her back and let her sob. Maddie and Josh rushed into the room and Maddie and I exchanged a look as I continued to cradle a weeping Sydney to me. Maddie moved to Sarah, having established a good relationship with her over the past year, and hugged her tight.

I spent the next four hours on the floor near Sydney’s chair. Josh had gone out and bought everyone coffee and pastries to hold us over, but we couldn’t get Sydney to take any of it. A doctor finally emerged to update Sydney, only to tell her that David’s heart had been hit by the bullet and that they were trying to fix it.

If anything, the news made Sydney worse. I watched helplessly as my best friend tried to keep it to together, and Maddie and I took turns comforting her. It was almost two in the morning, and Maddie and I were leaning against each other for support, when the doctor came out. I watched as he went right for Sarah and Sydney and I breathed a sigh of relief when he spoke the words “His heart is beating on its own.”

Maddie squeezed my hand as tight as she could and we exchanged relieved looks as we stood to hug Sydney.

“Do you want us to stay?” Maddie asked as she released our friend. “We don’t mind.”

I nodded in agreement. “We definitely can.”

Sydney shook her head as she wiped her eyes. “Go home and rest. Thank you both so much for sitting here with me.”

“Of course,” I said as I hugged her to me firmly. “Call us and we’ll be here, Syd.”

Maddie and I trudged back to the elevator and rode it down in silence. I glanced over at her and yawned.

“Is Josh at his house or the apartment?” Josh had left us around eleven after Maddie had forced him out. He had work in the morning and Maddie wanted him to make sure he got some sleep.

“I don’t even know,” Maddie said with a little laugh. “Let’s just go to the apartment. We’re both too tired for you to drive me to Folsom.”

I thanked her silently because I definitely did not want to make that drive in that moment. I took the two of us back to the apartment in my little Toyota with the windows down to keep us awake.  Josh’s truck wasn’t in the parking lot so I knew it’d be just us for the night. I changed into my pajamas and poked my head into Maddie’s room to say goodnight. She was just getting in bed herself and she gestured to the spot next to her.

I laid down where she pointed without having to be asked again and cuddled into her pillow. I grabbed her hand and the two of us immediately fell asleep.

---

“The food here is delicious,” I said as I stuffed another bite of baked chicken in my mouth. “I want to live here for the food.”

My mom laughed from her chair and her eyes shined bright as she watched me.

“It’s good to see your appetite so hardy, Panda. You’re losing weight and you shouldn’t be.”

I took a sip of my water and sighed. “Everything makes me sick, Mama. This is great, but I doubt it will stay down.”

“Try some ginger ale. That always helped me when I was pregnant with you.” Mom took a bite of her own food and I nodded at her suggestion.

It had been a week since she had moved in and almost a week since that night in the hospital. Mom loved the home. Hell, I loved the home. The caretakers were amazingly nice and involved. The other residents all seemed happy and friendly. The events and activities they had were all fun and varied and I knew she’d never get bored. Plus, the food was really damn good.

With Sydney spending every night in the hospital, I had been sleeping at Mom’s house and slowly finishing my cleaning and de-cluttering. I had presented all of my ideas to my mom, and she had agreed with every one of them. She then told me that she would be more than happy to listen to my ideas as long as I wasn’t seeking her approval- it was now my house and I was to do with it whatever I wanted.

It had all been made official when the lawyer had stopped by the home the afternoon before. The three of us had sat around the table and refreshed the legal documents to ensure that I was Mom’s legal Power of Attorney, and to transfer the majority of her assets into my name completely. Anything left over was put in both of our names as I was named Mom’s official caregiver. It’d been a crap day, but Mom was trying to ensure that everything was settled and streamlined just in case. I definitely did not want to think about the ‘just in case’ scenarios.

Mom and I sat at our own table in their dining room, only it was arranged more like a restaurant instead of the cafeteria you’d see in school. I had spent most of my Saturday with Mom and she had jokingly accused me of using her for the food.

“That’s what moms are for, right?” I smiled at her and she nodded enthusiastically.

We were just finishing up dinner when my phone vibrated in my pocket. I ignored it, not wanting it to cut into my time with Mom, but by the fourth time the person had called, I pulled it out.

“I’m sorry, Mama. It’s Maddie and she’s called several times in a row.” I frowned as I stared at it.

“Answer it, sweetheart,” Mom said as she gestured to the phone.

I swiped the screen and brought it to my ear. “Hey Mad.”

“Amanda. David’s back in surgery and no one knows anything. Apparently he just started having chest pains and then he coded. I’m on my way to the hospital.” Maddie’s voice was frantic and my eyes widened.

“Hold on, Maddie.” I looked at my mom. “I’m sorry, Mama. It’s Sydney’s boyfriend again. I’ve got to go.”

Mom nodded. “Go, honey. Be with your friend. I love you.”

“I love you, too.” I gave her a swift hug and practically ran out of the nursing home to my car.

I made it to the elevator and almost crashed into Matt. He put his hands out to steady me as the doors closed and he gave me a sad smile.

“Hey.”

“Hi Matt,” I huffed, slightly out of breath from sprinting across the hospital. “Do you know anything?”

He shook his head and stuffed his hands into his pockets “Not a thing. Maddie says Sydney is in shock and won’t talk to anyone.”

I bit my lip to keep the tears in and shook my head at Matt, unable to say anything.

“Oh Manda.” He sighed and pulled me to his chest. He held me forcefully as the elevator came to a stop, only releasing his hold when the doors opened. “Stay strong for Syd, okay?”

“Okay,” I whispered as he walked next to me out of the elevator, his hand pressed against the small of my back.

Sydney was slouched against the wall in the waiting room with her head on her knees. Maddie was sitting next to her, rubbing her back, and she caught my frantic expression and tipped her head towards her step-brother.

“How is he?” I whispered to Sean as Matt and I approached where he was sitting with his arm around David’s sleeping sister.

Sean frowned. “They’re working on him. The repair they did on his heart the other day failed and they are trying to stop the bleeding.”

“Oh,” I breathed, putting my hand over my mouth as the tears welled in my eyes. I blinked them back rapidly, not wanting to break down in front of Sydney. Matt gestured for me to sit in the chair next to Sean and sat in the one next to me. I watched as Maddie continued to speak to softly, but Sydney didn’t seem to acknowledge her.

I stayed in the chair watching my two friends for almost an hour when Sydney finally lifted her head to speak to Maddie. I moved to go over there when Matt’s hand covered my own, keeping me in my seat.

“Who’s that?” He asked quietly, looking at the person who’d just entered the waiting room.

I stared at the man who looked uncharacteristically uncertain of his surroundings but gazed upon Sydney with affection. His suit was probably worth more than my car, but he didn’t seem worried about anything except his daughter.

“Sydney’s dad,” I responded softly as I kept my eyes fixed upon the tall man, whose balding head did nothing to take away from his commanding appearance.

“Sydney,” Harold Lewis said quietly, and she snapped her head up to look at him. He walked towards his daughter and I saw her break apart at the sight of him.

“Daddy?” She choked through her tears as he sat down on the floor and pulled her into his arms. Sydney’s body shook as her sobs filled the waiting room. Maddie stood and moved to sit on the other side of Sarah as she wiped tears of her own.

Sydney’s cries died off after a little while and I realized that she had cried herself to sleep. Josh appeared in the waiting room and Maddie stood, immediately moving into his arms.

“I’m so sorry. I left Reno as soon as I heard, but traffic was terrible.” Josh directed his fiancée back into her chair, taking the one next to her. He continued to whisper to Maddie and I heard her sniffle into his shirt quietly.

I didn’t even realize Matt’s hand was still on mine until he pulled it away and settled back into his chair. He looked over at me and gave me a small frown.

“Were Dave and Sydney able to work through their problems?”

“Yeah,” I replied, my voice hoarse. I cleared my throat and gave him a feeble smile. “He was only able to talk for about twenty-four hours because of the tube, but she says that they’re going to be okay. She sounded happier than she had in over a month.” I looked at my shoes and bit the inside of my cheek roughly. When I spoke again my voice was a whisper.

“What if he doesn’t make it?”

Sean’s hand grabbed one of mine, extracting it from the other. I didn’t even realize I had been clutching them together so tight that my fingers had turned stark white. He let his head rest against mine, and I sighed but stayed quiet as I let Sean’s comfort wash over me.

No one really spoke. Maddie fell asleep against Josh with her hand in Sarah’s. Sarah eventually shifted her head from Sean’s shoulder to the wall behind her and he adjusted in his chair to get comfortable. I sat up straight, trying to keep my eyes open as time ticked on.

I watched as Sydney’s mother walked in, very unsure of herself. Diane Lewis was a strange lady, having raised Sydney at arm’s length. It had turned out that the reason behind Sydney’s crappy upbringing had been fear, but it didn’t change the past. Sydney was working on forgiving her parents and it seemed they were working on earning it.

Diane walked to where her husband was awake with Sydney’s head in his lap as she slept, and she sat on the opposite side of her daughter. She leaned over to kiss Sydney’s forehead before getting as comfortable as she could on the floor. When she looked up, she caught my eye. For a second she froze, but then she gave me a small smile that I returned. I knew it wasn’t easy for her, but for Sydney’s sake I was so happy she was trying.

I felt my head fall forward and I jerked awake, not even realizing I had fallen asleep. A warm hand moved to the side of my head and directed me until I was against a chest. I breathed in the familiar scent of Matt and let myself fall asleep up against him.

“Amanda.” Fingers ran through my hair and I snuggled in deeper, refusing to open my eyes.

“Wake up, sweets,” the soft voice said and I cracked my eyes open slightly. The fingers ran through my hair again and I pulled my head from Matt’s chest to look at him.

“What happened?”

Matt smiled and let his arm fall back on the chair behind me. “He’s okay.”

“Oh, thank goodness,” I sighed and ran my hands down my face. “That is great news.” I looked to where Sydney was hugging her parents and she found my eyes, giving me a tired smile. I stood and we embraced each other almost painfully.

“He’s okay, Amanda,” she whispered in my arms and I nodded.

“He is, Syd. Go be with him and get some sleep, okay? Call me if you need anything.” I released the hold on her and we left the room as Sarah and Sydney waited for someone to take them to the ICU.

I rode the elevator down with Maddie, Josh, Sean, and Matt and all of us remained quiet as we approached the ground floor.

“Just leave your car, Madelyn.” Josh spoke quietly to Maddie. “We’ll come get it tomorrow.”

She nodded in agreement and gave me a tired hug as we stepped out into the dark night.

“Love you.”

“I love you, too,” I replied as I gave her a tired nod. Sean gave me a tight squeeze and walked with Maddie and Josh towards his own car.