Second Chance (37 page)

We step out of the Desert Sky Gallery and I’m
two-hundred and
fifty dollars
richer
,
but that doesn’t even compar
e
with
the fact that someone loves
my pictures
.
And sees potential
.
And I have a show
.
My first gallery show.

I grab Gray’s hand and pull him down the street
, half skipping,
and tell him we need
to celebrate
.

“I have an idea,” I say
.
“Let’s have a Peep-eating contest
.
My treat.”
  I start rambling about how the bunny Peeps are better than the chicken Peeps
,
and how they’ve come out with chocolate mousse flavored Peeps
that look disgusting but maybe we should give them a try
.
I
wait for
Gray
to respond
, but he’s looking at my hand
wrapped around
his and his eyebrows are raised
.
I hate that he’s so annoyed by my touch
.
I drop his hand with a frown.

“Sorry,” I say
.
“Habit.”

“It’s alright.”
He walks a little ahead of me
.
I sigh as I watch the unnatural distance between us grow
.
This is ridiculous
.
Did we time warp back to
eighth grade
?

“Oh,
ow
!
”
I yell and cover my mouth with my hand
.
Gray’s turning to
unlock
his car
door
but he stops and looks at me.

“What?”

“
Ow
,” I moan and I keep my hand tight on my mouth
.
“I just bit
my lip.
”
I stop walking and Gray
studies
me.

“You’re fine,” he says.

“It really hurts
.
I taste blood.”

He
walks
up to me and
tries to move my hand but I keep it
rigid
against my mouth.

“No,” I
mutter
through my fingers. H
e leans his head down to get a closer look and fights to pull my hand away
,
his eyes genuinely concerned
.
I wait until he’s an inch closer
, then
I drop my hand
,
arch my feet and press my lips against his
.
Before he can react, I wrap my arms around his neck to pull his head down closer to mine and try to hold my lips against his as long as it will last
.
It’s rough and forced and it’s not going to win an award for the most glamorous kiss of all times, but it’s a start
.
Gray
yanks
my hands off his neck and his blue eyes are
inches from mine,
shooting bullets.

“You
lying,
manipulating little—
”

But
he cuts himself off and slams
his lips hard against mine
and I can barely keep my
legs
steady because something
powerful
is rushing through my system
.
He drags me into the alley
and we stumble and I can hear a radiator
buzzing next to us
.
He pushes me against the brick wall
.
I pull
him closer
until his chest is pressed against mine
. H
is baseball cap flops off his head and lands somewhere by our feet
.

I squeeze my eyes shut and I want to cry because this kiss doesn’t come close to my memory
.
It’s a million times better
.

***

By the time we make it back to his car, our faces are flushed
and my legs are shaky
.
I steal glances
at Gray while he drives me home
.
His lips are
raw and red from making out for an hour
.

Only one thought fill
s
my mind
.
That was amazing.

I reach my hand out to touch his lips but Gray leans away from my fingers
.

“
That was
a mistake,” he says
.

His words snap me
out of my
trance
and I stare at his defiant expression
.
True, I attacked him
,
but he definitely didn’t fight me
.
There were two people kissing back there, for an hour
.
And he has the nerve to
call the greatest moment of the year
a mistake
?
H
e pulls up to my driveway
and I wait for him to look at me
,
but his eyes
are focused out the window
.
Coward
.

“Should we talk about this?” I ask
.

Gray mumbles
that
he needs to get to practice
.
I stare out at my apartment
.
I
don’t push it and I don’t argue
because I know what he needs
when his heart is warring with his mind
.
Time
.

I
get out of the car and watch him
peel out of the driveway
.
I hear
rap music loudly curse
the air
.
I can’t help but smile
as his car disappears down the street
.
I notice
d
his hands adjust his shorts in the car, to hide something slightly obvious in his pants
.
Okay, so he’s still attracted to me
.
Check that one off my list
.
Now, time to bring down those walls
.

GRAY

“If you want any control over this, then whatever you do, do not have sex with her,” Bubba warns me
.

We’re
all
sitting around
the living room
watching
Transformers
,
which invariably leads to discussing having sex with Megan Fox, which broadens to sex talk in general
.
I stare at him
.
Bubba, of all people
,
is telling me to avoid sex
?
These are
the most
contradictory
words he
ha
s ever spoken.

“Don’t even think about having sex,” Bubba says
.
“It’s a dead end
.
She’ll get you right where she wants you and then she’ll start calling all the shots
.
Sex gives women complete
control
.”

Miles throws a ratty couch pillow
, hitting
Bubba on the side of the head.

“Are you hearing yourself?” Miles says
.
“You have no business dishing out advice you could never take.” 

“W
omen have three ultimate powers we will always
succumb
to,”
Bubba insists
.
“Two boobs and one vagina
.”
 

“What?” I say.

“
It’s true
.
Their bodies are their number one weapon
.
They know we can’t get enough of them
.
No matter how big or small or round or skinny they are
.
We don’t care
.
We’re so simple minded, Gray
.
They think we’re so hard to figure out
.
Well, we’re not
.
We’re pathetically predictable
.
We just want unlimited access to their bodies
, a
nd we’ll do anything to get it
.
We’ll buy flowers and write poems and take dance classes and pretend
we enjoy window shopping and
act like we notice their haircuts, but in the end, we do it for the
nookie
.
I
t’s how we’re wired.”