Second Chances (10 page)

"Perhaps you're right. But perhaps you aren't and for the moment I would prefer not to answer that question. Is that okay?"

His words were spoken so softly, like a scolded child asking his mother for forgiveness. Paige's heart ached for the pain she heard trapped within his words.

"Sure. Whatever you want, but...sure."

"What? Another question?"

"Yes," Paige said. "But this one...God, I really do not want to do this to you."

"Go ahead, Paige. All I can say is no."

She nodded.

"Did you get to see her afterwards? Did...did you have to..."

She stopped, unable to finish.

"Identify the body?"

"Yes," she whispered.

"No."

"No, you don't want to answer or just no?"

"No, I did not have to identify her body."

"Is that why you think..."

"Dental records. They...they had to use dental records."

Paige gasped. Of all the things that she had imagined Nathan might say, his reference to dental identification wasn't even on the list.

"Oh my God! Nathan, I am so sorry. I did not mean to...to..."

He shook his hand dismissing her apology, exactly what he meant by the gesture she couldn't tell.

Paige wasn't certain if she should continue. However, she knew that the longer she allowed Nathan to believe that she was his Paige, the more devastating it would be when she finally proved she wasn't.

"Doesn't that prove that I am not her? It must have been terrible. I cannot even begin to imagine what you went through. But are you telling me that you think the...the dental records were wrong?"

"No. I can honestly say I never doubted them. I doubted many things about your...about Paige's death, but in the past year I never truly doubted that it happened. I prayed it hadn't, dreamt it hadn't, but the truth is I never doubted that yo... that Paige was truly dead."

She was grateful that he hadn't said that he hadn't believed that she was dead. She knew he was struggling not to refer to her as his wife.

"I never doubted that until yesterday."

"Until you saw me in the airport?"

"Exactly."

"So now you think the dental records were wrong?"

"No," Nathan said. "Not wrong exactly. Just faked."

"Faked?"

"It's the only think that makes sense. I see you, you are right here before me. So obviously there is no way you died last year. So there is no way those dental records were real."

"And you think what?"

"I don't know. I am saying that those dental records being fake is the only thing that fits given the evidence I see right before my eyes. I don't have all the answers. Hell, I don't likely have any of them. All I am trying to do is figure out what all the evidence is telling me. I have memories of our time together. I have pictures of our wedding, our trips. I still have a house full of your belongings back in Connecticut. I'm not a detective, but I'm doing my best to piece together what I can."

"Where is Columbo when you need him?"

He smiled at her joke, but she knew it was forced.

"The evidence tells me that you...shit...Paige didn't die last year as I was lead to believe. You, her, whatever, are here right now and are very much alive."

Paige could see his frustration, his struggle to convince her he was right. Maybe trying to convince himself as well.

"No, Nathan. I did not die a year ago. I was in college. But Paige, your Paige, did die." She did her best to sound sure and yet compassionate. She did not want to betray to Nathan the millions of questions and doubts that were rushing within her. She didn't even want to admit them to herself.

"But the evidence..."

"Your evidence. What about me? What about my memories? Don't they count? What about my evidence? What about..."

Paige stopped and he could tell that she was thinking that she did not have any other evidence of her own. Not anymore anyway. She was thinking about a fire, the fire. Nathan could remember when his Paige had first told him about it years ago.

"I know what you are thinking. But I know what I know. I have my memories. And that is all the proof I need," Paige insisted.

She tried hard to sound confident, but the passion had gone out of her voice. Even as she said the words, she knew she was lying. If she completely believed her words, if she had been totally certain then she'd never have come here with Nathan. She would never have even entertained the notion, never emailed Linda and told her not to come get her.

"Linda!" She almost screamed the name.

"Linda?"

"My friend, the one that was going to pick me up yesterday. The one who had helped to arrange my job. She is my evidence. We were practically inseparable the last two years of college. She'll be able to back me up. She'll surely have pictures of us together."

She stopped and looked over at Nathan, he wouldn't meet her gaze.

"I'm sorry, Nathan, but you'll see. I'm not the one in those pictures. I don't know who she was or why she led you to believe she was me. However, isn't it better that you know for certain? I mean would you rather go on thinking I am your wife? Would you rather believe that I somehow faked my death in order to leave you?"

The look on his face was enough to tell her that he'd never contemplated such a scenario, his words confirmed it.

"I...never entered my mind. You and...Paige and I were so happy together."

"I am sorry. I did not mean it that way...I'm sorry."

"Don't be, I know you didn't mean it."

"No, not for that. I'm so sorry for you. For your loss."

She wiped at the tears that started to flow.

"I can see it in your eyes. I can hear it in your voice. You loved her so much."

"She...she was my reason."

Paige tried not to look at him, to not look at his own tears, his pain. It was so raw, so undeniable. He'd been given hope. He'd believed, maybe only for a moment, but it had been enough. He'd been given hope and now he was losing his wife all over again."

"I'm sorry, Nathan. I know who I am and Linda will prove that."

He remained silent for a few moments before he finally nodded.

"Maybe so. However, even if she does, it may be the end for you, but it'll only leave me with more questions."

"Who was your Paige?"

Again he nodded.

Perhaps Linda would be able to prove to Nathan that Paige had not been the wife he'd lost. Big maybe. They both realized that that would not solve everything and they both silently decided, at least for the moment, to leave all the other questions unspoken.

Paige looked at him, at his pain and couldn't take it any longer. She stood and walked to the railing. He wrapped his arms around her and wept. She wept with him, for him.

Later, just how much Nathan couldn't have said, she asked him if he still wanted to talk to Linda. If he still needed to hear it from her. She knew what his answer would be, but she longed to spare him any more pain.

"Please. I hate to do this to you. Hate to put you through anymore than I already have. But I need...I...."

"Closure?"

"Yes, as ridiculous as that sounds since it won't really be true closure, merely the start of more questions."

For both of us
, Paige thought. "I understand. You need to close this door so you can move on to the next."

Nathan nodded.

"I'll go make the call."

His phone chirped a second time before he could answer it.

"Yes?"

"Mr. Kassar?"

He recognized Linda's voice immediately.

"Yes, Linda? She's made contact again?"

"Yes."

"Well?"

"She says she met someone."

"She met someone? All this concern because she got horny?"

"Yes. No. I don't know exactly. She wouldn't go into details, but she actually sounded quite distressed."

"Perhaps because she thinks she might lose her job? What did she say?"

"Could be the job, but I kind of doubt it. She wouldn't go into detail. Only said that she had met someone and wanted me to meet him."

"When?"

"Today, for a late lunch or early dinner if possible. I tried to get some details, but like I said she sounded a bit upset and wasn't giving anything up."

"What did you tell her?"

"I said of course, but that I had to try and clear my schedule. She is going to call me back."

"Do you know where she is?"

"Some hotel by the airport. She didn't say which. Do you want me to initiate..."

"Do nothing of the sort," he snapped.

She waited in silence. He could hear her breathing, rapid and shallow.

"Meet her and observe only."

"But..."

"Is this a bad connection? Did you not hear what I said?"

"No, I heard..."

"Repeat it."

"I'll go and observe."

"Very good. Be sure to get some pictures and report back as soon as the opportunity presents itself. Clear? Questions?"

"No, Mr. Kassar. I understand compl..."

Kassar clicked off the phone before she could finish. Cameron sighed and rubbed his forehead. Had they moved too quickly with her? He had to admit that they likely had and it had been his fault. She should never have been sent off without some kind of tracker on her, a cell phone at the very least. He cursed himself for such a simple oversight. Going off script eventually was expected, inevitable really, but something about this felt very wrong.
 

Nathan talked with the woman at the front desk and on her recommendation, they decided they would meet Linda at a small Italian restaurant that was about thirty minutes away. Well it was more Nathan who decided, insisted really. Paige had wanted to say yes when Linda had suggested that she drive out and pick them up at their hotel, but Nathan had vetoed that idea. He hadn't said why and hadn't really volunteered much of an answer when she had asked. He had mumbled something about wanting to get out for a bit, but now as they rode silently in the cab he considered his actions.

She definitely shouldn't have come to the hotel. No way, that was out of the question. But why? Why had his gut reaction been so strong about such a simple issue?

"No place to retreat to," he whispered.

"What?"

He looked over at Paige.

"Did you say something?"

"No, well yes," he replied. "Sorry, just talking to myself."

Just nervous
, she thought. And why shouldn't he be? Hell, why shouldn't she be? He was so certain that she was his dead wife and yet in only a short time that belief would come crashing down. Linda would be able to prove that Paige was exactly who she said she was. She would thereby prove that whomever had been this man's wife had in fact lied to him about who she'd been. In essence his reality for the last several years would crumble apart. Linda would be able to prove that, right?

He looked at her for a moment, she had turned away and was looking out the car window, surely lost in her own thoughts.

No place to retreat to
, he thought again. Yes that was it exactly. He'd never been out here before, but the hotel they had stayed at was as close to a home base as they had. You didn't let the enemy into your home if you could avoid it.

Enemy? Yes, he supposed that was exactly how he saw this woman. He was quite certain he was not going to like her, yet he wasn't sure he knew why. Certainly if she was able to backup Paige's own beliefs about who she was, confirm her location for the last few years, it would rob him of the hope he'd been clinging to. But was that the only reason he already hated this Linda woman? Was that the only reason he felt the need to have some place to retreat to? Was this happening too quickly? There were still so many things he wanted and likely should have addressed with Paige. So many things, similarities, that were the same and yet different or just off by a hair. So many theories were spinning around in his mind.

Paige glanced over at Nathan, he was mumbling to himself again. She did not bother to ask if he was talking to her this time. Maybe he was preparing himself for the inevitable truth. She found her heart ached for him, for the pain he was so near to experiencing. She had no doubt that Linda would be the one to crack the dam and let loose the flood that Nathan was desperately trying to hold at bay. She hated to see him hurt. She didn't know him, or rather hadn't until recently, but she realized that she already felt something for him. Oh, not the slightly scary all encompassing love which he expressed for her, but something more than a mild attraction. It wasn't just that he was good looking. She'd known plenty of good looking men, but he was somehow different.
 

Paige got the feeling that Nathan might very well be exactly the type of man she really wanted and it saddened her to think in just a short while she would hurt this man to his core. The truth would be revealed and he'd be devastated. He'd be emotional, as he'd been a number of times since they had met, but that was okay. The type of emotions he'd shown were understandable. If you lost the love of your life, you were allowed to show the pain.

She realized a few things as they drove along. One thing was that she absolutely loathed the woman who'd been this man's wife. Whether or not she was in fact dead, Paige hated her. She did not hate her for dying, if she had died, but she hated her for lying to him. Hated her for stealing her life story and passing it off as her own. How dare that bitch? Why? Why lie to such an obviously sweet and caring man? What could have been so bad in her life that she had felt the need to steal Paige's identity?

Paige hated her for looking so much like her, because she was certain that Nathan would never be able to look at her without thinking of this other woman. She would be a constant source of pain and so she knew that after today she would likely never see him again. It was crazy to even contemplate the possibility of them forming some type of relationship. Crazy or not, she briefly flirted with the notion of it. But to him, she would forever be a constant reminder not only of what he'd lost, but of the lies he'd been told.