Secret Kiss (26 page)

That wasn’t the case tonight. At least, it hadn’t been since dessert arrived. Jane had casually put her hand on his knee beneath the tablecloth. Then, before he’d known it, she’d moved it up to his thigh. And now, as her grandparents ordered coffee, her fingers slid so far up that her knuckles and fingers were grazing his zipper-covered, rock-hard shaft. If she continued moving her hand the way she was, he was going to come in his pants.

He’d never been quick on the draw before Jane, but he was afraid he should put a blue bandana around his neck, don a big, red hat, slap on a holster, and change his last name to McGraw. She drove him crazy when she
wasn’t
trying to, so when she put even the slightest effort in, he was a goner. Totally and completely at her mercy.

While Walter and Dolores had a lively discussion over whether Walter should have one or two scoops of sugar in his coffee, he leaned over and whispered in Jane’s ear, “If you keep doing that, I’m not going to be able to stand up and walk out of here.”

Jane turned to look at him, her eyes wide, as if she really had no idea what he was talking about. He dropped his eyes to his lap, and a blush rose up her cheek so fast that it looked like a thermometer in a cartoon when someone had a fever. She pulled her hand back so quickly that she could have definitely given him a run for his money for the title of Quick Draw McGraw.

Thankfully, a glance over at her grandparents assured Adam that they hadn’t seen their granddaughter’s hasty hand retreat. When he looked back, Jane had the hand that had been on his junk covering her mouth as she shook her head. He pulled her in for a hug because he didn’t want her nana and papa asking why their Jane Bunny looked so horrified.

Adam was good at coming up with cover stories, but he wasn’t sure how he’d explain that one.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered against his neck as he ran his hand through her hair.

Snuggling into her hair, he assured her, “There’s nothing to be sorry about. I just didn’t want to embarrass myself.”

“Kids, do you want coffee?” Walter asked them.

“No,” they answered in unison as they settled back into their seats.

Whether or not he and Jane ordered coffee wouldn’t end this dinner any sooner. It wasn’t like they could ditch Walter and Dolores while they were enjoying their after-dinner java. But, if turning coffee down gained him even a thirty-second advantage, he’d take it. Hell, he’d take a ten-second advantage.

As Walter discussed why he’d switched to decaf, Adam was trying to process the fact that Jane really hadn’t had any idea that she’d been getting so frisky. He’d seen women play coy, but when he’d said that he wouldn’t have been able to be able to walk out of there if she’d continued doing what she’d been doing, it wasn’t coyness that spread across her face. She’d been mortified.

That was cute as hell to Adam. That meant that Jane felt so comfortable with him that she hadn’t been thinking about where her hand had been. She’d been doing what had felt natural to her. And, holy shit, that had felt natural.

The more time he spent around Jane, the more he saw that there was not a calculated or manipulative bone in her body, and that, more than anything else, was the thing that was breaking down the last of the walls he’d built around his heart.

Those walls had been up a lot longer than he’d originally assumed. If someone had asked Adam where the walls had originated, he would’ve pointed to when everything had gone south with Alexis, but that wasn’t true. He’d never felt this connected, this open, this real with anyone in his life. Especially not his ex.

He had never truly trusted her. Not with himself, at least. He’d trusted her not to do what she’d done, but being with Jane, even though he wasn’t really
with
Jane, was making him see that he’d never actually let Alexis in.

In the short time he’d spent with Jane, she was closer to him and had seen more of the real him than Alexis had in a decade.

“Oh, no. Let me get that.” Jane’s voice rose as she leaned across the table.

Adam realized that the check had arrived and she was trying to keep her grandfather from paying it.

“Walter, please. Let me get it.” Adam, having much longer arms than Jane, was able to easily reach the bill folder.

“Oh, no, son. It’s our treat,” Walter protested.

“Please. It’s the least I can do. I insist.” Adam didn’t want to wrestle the man, but there was no way he was going to let Jane’s grandparents pick up the bill.

“Oh, Walter, let Adam pay.” Dolores swatted her husband’s arm before saying pointedly as she stood, “Thank you, Adam. Now, take me upstairs, Wally. That bathtub is calling my name.”

When Jane’s grandfather heard that, he was out of his chair, moving with speed Adam hadn’t known the man possessed. He barely gave a wave before snuggling his wife close to him and whispering something in her ear that had Dolores giggling like a schoolgirl and swatting him again.

“They can’t keep their hands off each other. Never could,” Jane said with a sigh.

“I know the feeling.” Adam looked at her as he waved the waiter over.

The smile Adam was finding to be more addictive than caffeine—or, from what he’d heard, crack cocaine—lifted Jane’s lips. In that moment, Adam had a flash of the future, one where he and Jane were at a restaurant in fifty years, still crazy about each other, and arguing over how much sugar Adam could have in his coffee. He’d never seen that kind of future, even with Alexis.

“Are you okay?” Jane asked as she touched his forearm, her beautiful face etched with concern.

“Yeah. I’m better than okay.” Adam grinned as the waiter finally arrived and he was able to take care of the check.

He wasn’t just okay. For the first time in his life…he was in love.

‡

T
he elevator ride was taking forever and going too fast at the same time. She was coming out of her skin with anticipation at the thought of getting into the room. But on the flip side of that was the realization that this night was going to be over soon and she wanted to be present, to really cherish every minute—every second—they had.

For someone like Jane, that was easier said than done. Her mind was constantly racing with what could possibly happen next. What the worst repercussion could conceivably be for whatever was happening and how she would handle it. How she would survive it.

That was another thing her therapist had told her was a by-product of having lost her parents. Professionally, that trait had been one of her greatest strengths. Personally, it had worked for her as well. She had known she could handle the outcomes of Disasters #1 – 5. Basically, the biggest fallout had been that she’d had to start dating again.

Hindsight being twenty-twenty, she knew she hadn’t really been invested in the person she’d been with. She’d had relationships spanning years and she hadn’t felt a tenth of what she felt for Adam. How in the world was she going to go on with her life as if nothing had happened when this was over?

Adam hadn’t spoken since he’d paid the check, and she wondered what he was thinking. Last night, in the garage, everything had happened so organically. She might have shown up on Adam’s doorstep wearing nothing but a silk robe, but the truth was that she really
had
gotten locked out of her house. This was different. This was premeditated sexy time which had sounded great up until she had stepped into the elevator.

Now, she was in her head. She couldn’t stop thinking of everything that could possibly go wrong. What if last night had only been so hot because it had been spontaneous? What if tonight was less spectacular because it was somewhat planned? What if things between them weren’t as explosive as they had been against the wall or on the weight bench?

The doors opened, and emotions buzzed through her like bees around a hive. She was nervous. Anxious. Excited. Scared.

As they stepped onto their floor, Adam guided her to their room with his hand on her back. She wondered if he could feel her shaking. Would he know she was nervous? Was nervousness a turn-off?

Jane had never been this freaked out about having sex, not even when she’d lost her virginity. She had been curious and a little apprehensive that it would hurt, but crawling-out-of-her-skin nervous? Not even close.

Adam’s hand never left her back as he slid the keycard into the door and smoothly opened it.

Walking into the room, Jane was starting to worry that Adam was having second thoughts as well. When he spoke, he didn’t put her nerves to rest. He amplified them tenfold.

“Listen.” His voice sounded measured as the door clicked into place behind him. “We really need to talk.”

Tears began to prick at the backs of her eyes. She wished she could just disappear. Vanish. What had she been thinking when she’d agreed to this? Of course he would have second thoughts. Look at him.

“No, it’s fine.” She tried to keep her voice steady as she let him off the hook. The last thing she wanted was for him to know how devastating this was for her. “We don’t have to talk. Don’t worry about it.”

She tried to move past Adam into the bathroom. She just wanted to get this stupid dress off, put her sweats on, and curl up on the sofa, because she didn’t trust herself to lie in the same bed with Adam. Her mind and broken heart might have known that nothing was going to happen, but her body had its own ideas—as was evidenced during dinner. She still couldn’t believe she’d been groping Adam and hadn’t realized it. Even now, it was hard for her to believe that it had happened. But it had. She’d been stroking the zipper line of his slacks.

Hello? Who was she?!

Apparently, a girl who felt men up while eating with her grandparents
, Jane answered her own rhetorical question.

Moving to the side didn’t get her anywhere. Adam stepped in front of her and wrapped his hands around her upper arms. When he didn’t speak for a moment, she felt drawn like a moth to the flame and lifted her eyes to his.

He was intently studying her face, and there was so much emotion there that it almost caused the threatening tears to jump the gun and join the party.

“You’re upset.” Adam voice was strained.

Yeah. No shit, Sherlock.
Jane shocked herself when she thought up such a biting comeback. Hmm, it seemed that sexual frustration, no sleep, and extreme embarrassment turned her into a bitch with a capital B.

“I’m fine.” She forced her mouth to lift in a smile as she lied through her teeth.

“No. You’re not,” he shot back. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” She let out a small laugh, trying to act casual. Lifting her arms, she stepped out of his hold, turning her hands over she assured him, “I’m good. We don’t have to do anything, and we especially don’t need to talk about it.”

He blinked and shook his head. “Wait. You think that I don’t want anything to happen tonight?”

“Can we
not
talk about this?” She crossed to the right in a second attempt to make her great escape.

Her plan was foiled once again, but this time, he didn’t just hold her arms. In one quick move, he had her up against the wall, her dress around her waist, and her legs wrapped around him. Grabbing his wide shoulders for support, she gasped as she felt solid evidence between her legs that told her that her earlier assumption might have been incorrect.

Even through her lace panties and his slacks, Jane could feel the steel length of his erection pulsing urgently with need. She rocked her hips into the hardness that was pressed against her. She hadn’t meant to, but when it came to Adam, her body went rogue, moving independently of her brain.

Adam’s forehead rested against hers, and their labored breathing was the sole sound in the hotel room, which was lit with nothing but the glittering lights of the city shining in through the windows. As her chest rapidly rose and fell, her heart pounded against her ribs. Every fiber in her being was alive with desire as her core rubbed enticingly against his rock-hard length, and she realized that her hips weren’t moving of their own accord. Adam’s large hand was grasping her backside, tilting her body up and down as his hands flexed, massaging her lace-covered butt cheek. His other hand was wrapped around the back of her neck, threading his fingers in the hair at the base of her neck.

He asked, his voice sounding tortured, “How can you think I don’t want you?”

Jane couldn’t speak. Not that she was sure she would know what to say even if she could. Now, her insecurities seemed silly, but a moment ago, they’d been so real.

His fingers tightened at her neck, and the sensation shot straight between her legs.

His breath was heavy as he continued. “All I do is think about you. I can’t stop thinking about you. Wanting you. You drive me crazy. How can you not see that?”

Tears were once again forming in her eyes, but this time, it was because she was so overwhelmed with pleasure and emotion. Good emotions. The feeling of Adam’s masculine body pinning her against the wall, being totally surrounded and supported by him while he said the things he was saying, was so overwhelming in the best possible way.

“I just thought,” she tried to explain, “when you said you wanted to talk… I thought you didn’t want to…”