Secret Worlds (219 page)

“I appreciate your apology, but I forgave you a long time ago. I won’t deny it hurt, but I’ve held out hope that you’d come to your senses. I’m a patient man. I knew that wouldn’t be our last chance. The only thing that matters is that you’re here now.”

The love radiating from Michael warmed her. She still didn’t understand how he could possibly want her, but she’d promised herself that she’d let him decide. “I want you to come away with me. If you’ll have me, that is.”

“Is that all? You’re asking me to fulfill the dream of several lifetimes? I don’t even need to pack for that.” His grin beckoned her. She could just leave it there, and they could be off, starting a new life together.

But that wasn’t fair. “That’s not everything, Michael. You need to know exactly what you’re getting into by coming with me.”

“What do you mean? I already know you’re a vampire. What more could there be?”

“Plenty. It’s going to have to be different this time. If you decide you want to be with me, it’s going to have to be on the run. A lot’s happened since you last died. My sire knows that you’re aware of the truth.”

“So?” Michael shook his head in confusion.

“It’s a capital offense, Michael. As soon as he told our clan leader, every vampire in the clan was ordered to kill me.”

“I never liked Lawrence, but I can’t imagine him capable of doing something like that. Are you sure?”

“Yes. You were right about him all along. The day I turned, Lawrence orchestrated the whole thing. He meant from the very beginning for you to be my transformation kill. He’s a bitter man, and he’s taken it out on me. I didn’t realize the truth before—” Something was wrong. In the back of Amaia’s mind, alarm bells rang. There was another vampire somewhere, about a mile away. Another benefit of her years of solitude had been an expanded range of sensitivity to energies. “We have to go. Now.” Amaia jumped to her feet, pulling Michael with her.

“Let me just grab some things.”

“No, Michael. You said you didn’t need to pack anything. I know this isn’t fair, but you have to decide right now whether you’re going to come with me or not. I can’t stay here any longer, and I won’t be coming back. It’s too dangerous.”

Michael silently appraised her face and then nodded. “Very well. Lead the way.”

Amaia, still holding his hand, led him outside. Once the door closed behind them, she scanned the street, hooking her arm in Michael’s, as if they were lovers out for a stroll. Nothing appeared suspicious, and the energy was to the right. It approached at a steady speed, clearly trying to mimic a human’s gait, but not succeeding. Humans rarely maintained a constant pace.

“This way.” Amaia walked to her left. Every instinct in her screamed to run, but she couldn’t. Michael wouldn’t be able keep up, and it was a bad idea to do anything that might draw attention. She needed to blend in and trust her skills to hide her energy. As long as they kept moving in the opposite direction, they would be fine.

“What’s going on?” Michael waited until they had walked for several minutes before speaking.

“I felt a vampire near.”

“Is he chasing you?”

“I don’t know. I also don’t know if it’s a he. Keep walking for now. Whoever it is shouldn’t be able to sense us.” Amaia drew more heat from the humans around her than normal. It would help her increase the frequency of her own energy without having to work so hard. Her eyes darted around, searching for a safe path out of the vampire’s vicinity.

“Do you have any money on you, Michael?”

“Yes. What do you need?”

“There.” Amaia nodded to her left. A cabbie waited with an empty carriage. “We can use him to reach the next city.”

Michael nodded and strode with purpose to the cabbie, his hand firmly clasping Amaia’s. “Are you looking for passengers?”

“Where are you headed?”

“Stockholm.”

“I can take you part of the way if you’ve got the money.”

“That’s fine.” Michael paid the man and opened the door, ushering Amaia inside. As soon as the door closed, they were off.

Amaia kept her senses tuned to the unknown vampire until they were far enough away that she couldn’t feel him or her anymore. Her shoulders dropped, and she leaned back, focusing her eyes on Michael for the first time. “The threat is gone. For now.”

Michael squeezed her hand where it rested in her lap.

“Don’t you have anything to say?” Amaia needed to hear Michael’s thoughts. He seemed content to sit and look at her, as if it was an everyday occurrence for his vampire lover to appear and whisk him away.

“Yes, I do.” Amaia’s nerves quickened at his somber tone. “I’m glad you came.”

Her nerves exploded into happy butterflies. “Is that it?”

“What else would you have me say, Amaia? I don’t care that we must leave. I don’t care that your clan knows. I don’t care if we have to live in poverty, as long as I can be with you. I fear that I’ll slow you down, and I won’t be much use in a fight against a vampire, but I’ll protect you with my life. I need you.”

Michael kissed her then, and Amaia’s heart swelled. It had been worth it. Leaving her clan, living on the edge, it was all worth it now that she was with Michael. He was right. He would slow her down, and in a fight he would be more of a liability than an asset, a distraction at best, but he made her strong. He poured tranquility into her heart and passion into her limbs. He gave her life.

Stockholm, August 1819

“Stay here. Don’t move.” Amaia left Michael in an alley that opened at the edge of town and crept to a man she had been watching. He’d been behind them, but she had felt his aura and had tossed some glances over her shoulder to confirm her suspicions. The dark energy came from him, and it was easy to guess his intent from the way he leered at a young woman a few paces ahead of him. It was past time for Amaia to eat, and he would do. She had hoped to wait until she could do it without Michael nearby, but she wasn’t quite ready to separate from him for any length of time.

In a movement so quick it would go unnoticed by the nearby humans, Amaia put a hand over his mouth and pulled him into the alley. A twist of her hands, and the man’s neck broke. That made it quick and easy, not to mention more palatable for Michael. After the man went limp, Amaia shoved him against the wall and descended on an artery. It was a sustenance kill without the level of pleasure she normally experienced. There hadn’t been time for him to express fear. She hadn’t been able to play with him. She was simply trying to get the blood she needed to keep going.

When the body was drained, she let it slump to the ground. Not a drop of blood remained on her lips. From a pocket in her dress, she withdrew some matches and a length of cloth. Kneeling next to the body, she wrapped the cloth around his neck and lit it. It wasn’t her intention to burn the body, but she wanted to at least burn the site of the bite to dispose of the venomous scent. Standing, she watched to make sure the fire did its work. When she was satisfied that it would keep burning, she turned to Michael who leaned heavily against the opposite wall.

“What, you don’t like what you see?” Amaia knew he had never truly wrapped his mind around the fact that she was a vampire.

“How can you ask that?” His face was the same pale shade as the corpse at his feet.

“Would it help you to know that he planned to rape the woman he was following?”

“How can you know that?”

Amaia cocked her head. “It doesn’t take a genius, Michael. Between the way he was looking at her and the tone of his energy, I’m certain.”

“But you’re not certain. Who made you this man’s judge?”

Amaia bristled at Michael’s tone. “Oh, I suppose I should leave the judging to God? And how has that worked out, Michael? Is the world just one peaceful orb?”

“Stop, Amaia.”

“I’m sorry. That wasn’t fair of me. I’m trying my best, Michael. I broke his neck, didn’t I? That takes all the fun out of it. I promise I’ll only kill people who have an evil aura.”

“Why do you have to kill at all?”

“Because they must die so that I can live. That’s what I am, Michael, a vampire. A parasite. I steal life. Normally, I could get by with simply feeding. My victims wouldn’t feel a thing. I would be so subtle, but I can’t do that now. If I feed, other vampires will be able to smell me on my victims. They’ll use it to track me. I have to dispose of the bodies.”

The sadness in Michael’s eyes cut to her core. She had vowed to protect him. She couldn’t live with herself if she forced him into a life he found distasteful. She would have to make sacrifices for him. He was worth it.

“Fine. I won’t kill or feed at all.”

“But how will you survive? I don’t want to lose you.” The struggle was clear in Michael’s eyes. He didn’t want her to commit such evils, but he had his selfish desire to be with her as well.

“I can feed off auras. I’ve never tried it long term. I’ve mainly just used it to give me a little burst of energy when I’ve needed it. There’s no reason to believe it won’t work to sustain me.”

“Are you sure?”

“What, now you’re worried about my comfort? Yes, I’m sure. You can either have people dead or me doing without blood. There are no other choices. And this one isn’t yours to make. I’m doing it voluntarily. You don’t have to worry about it. It won’t be as good as killing, and it’s more difficult, but it will keep me alive and moving. I’ll just have to do it much more often to avoid losing energy. My veins are full of blood, and as long as I leech the energy I need from humans to keep it circulating, I won’t burn off any. It will mean having to spend more time around humans.” Her nose wrinkled in disgust. She still had a hard time reconciling the fact that she was in love with one. Just because she preferred his company, didn’t mean she was eager to tolerate the presence of other humans. Without wealth and power, it just wasn’t worth it.

“Are we really that distasteful to you?”

“Yes. The fact that I can tolerate being around you is evidence of my love. Why do you think most vampires keep to themselves outside the cities? We’ll be fine. I’ve spent most of my existence surrounded by humans, pretending to be one. It was just one of the things I liked about being on the run: not having to submerge myself in them any longer.”

“I don’t want to cause you discomfort.”

“It’s worth it. I love you, Michael. I’ll do whatever I have to in order to be with you.” It was true, and Amaia was sure of her decision, but her stomach still lurched at the thought of never feeding again. In the grand scheme of things, it was a small price to pay. “I have to bury the body. It won’t take long.” She picked up the corpse and carried it behind the building, gesturing with her head for Michael to follow. The forest was only two hundred yards away. She would be able to see him the entire time. “Stay here. I’ll only be a moment.”

Michael looked all too happy to stay propped up against the brick wall and nodded his understanding. In less than five minutes, she was back at his side, wiping the dirt from her hands.

“It’s done. You won’t have to worry about me killing any longer.”

Michael cupped her neck with his hand and drew her to him, pressing his lips to hers. Amaia marveled that his mouth, while different from his past forms, was still familiar. Something about recognition made everything seem so right.

“What was that for?”

“For being so incredible. Thank you.”

Amaia held his eyes and knew that he truly saw her in a way no one else ever had. She felt exhilarated and frightened at the same time. How could she answer a man who believed these things about her? She couldn’t. “We’ll have to keep moving. We can stay a few days at a time in boardinghouses, but that’s it.”

“I don’t care. I’m getting everything I’ve spent my whole life wanting. We’ll see the world together.”

“This isn’t going to be a sightseeing tour, Michael. You don’t seem to understand the danger I’ve placed you in.”

“And you don’t understand just how important you are to me. I never want to die alone again, Amaia. I’m tired of it. We’ll do what we have to. Trust that I know what I’m saying.” His hand caressed her face, and his eyes looked past her into a different lifetime. “That’s always been your issue: trust. From the moment I met you, you’ve never trusted that I mean what I say, that I know my own heart and mind.” His sight returned to the present. “Nothing could make me believe that a life with you isn’t worth whatever tribulations we’ll face. Not even murderous vampires.”

“You couldn’t even stand to watch me kill that man, and that was a painless death. You don’t know the horrors vampires are capable of, the horrors I myself have committed.”

“I won’t pretend that I’m at peace with the way you’ve had to live, but it’s been a necessity for you, and it wasn’t your fault. As for the strength of my stomach, don’t you worry. I’ll face anyone or anything that threatens you.”

He still didn’t understand the darkness of Amaia’s soul, and he probably never would. The thought of his unconditional love drowned her. She needed to break the mood. “Please, don’t do that. It’ll be harder for me to protect you if you’re facing down the danger. If we should find ourselves with another vampire or two, please stay safely out of the way.” Amaia’s lips curved into a smile.

“Oh, you don’t think I can protect you?”

“I don’t think you can arm-wrestle me, Michael, much less destroy a bloodthirsty vampire.”

Michael gasped in mock affront. “You wound my pride, madam.” Scooping her into his arms, he cradled her to his chest. “But I think you may be right, so let’s not test your theory. I need to maintain some dignity.”

“Of course. Besides, you take care of me in all the ways that matter.” Michael kissed her softly on the lips, then she rested her head against his shoulder, relishing the feel of being held in his arms.

Stockholm, August 1819

“Amaia, this isn’t going to work.” Michael sat on the bed in the room they had rented for the night.

Fear ran down her spine. She had expected this. It shouldn’t be a surprise. “I understand. You need to live your own life. I never wanted it to be like this for you, always on the run.”