Secrets of My Hollywood Life #4: Paparazzi Princess (3 page)

DENNIS

Samantha, if we go, we're going as a family.

SAMANTHA

Well, then maybe I don't want to be part of this family any longer!

(Samantha runs from the kitchen in tears. Sara moves to follow her.)

PAIGE

(to Sara) Let her go. She needs time. She can't hide from the future forever.

Two: Back to Reality

"There you are!" Paul yells exuberantly as I enter the
FA
makeup room. "How's our little star? Did you have a good break?" I give him a huge hug. Paul is my hair designer (he's banned the word "hair dresser" from my vocabulary).

"Your skin is glowing," marvels Shelly, my makeup artist, as she wraps her large frame around me. "How was Turks and Caicos?"

"Great," I tell them. My vacation was incredible, but it feels good to be back in my comfort zone. "The weather was perfect every day," I gush. "Matty and I even went parasailing. Don't tell Tom," I add quickly.

"You made it back in one piece, so who cares?" quips Paul. He helps me up into the makeup chair and begins spritzing my wavy hair with water. My phone rings and Paul sighs. "You can answer it, but don't blame me if the curling iron singes your Motorola."

"HI!" Lizzie squeals when I pick up. "I told Mr. Harris that I needed to use the bathroom so I could sneak out and call you. Our flight from Hawaii was delayed last night and I didn't get in till late."

"That's okay. I missed you!" I tell her. "When are we getting together?"

"How about tonight?" Liz asks. "Slice of Heaven at eight?"

"I can't," I say guiltily. "I have a date with Austin." I grab my Sidekick and scroll through the week's schedule. "Tomorrow I'm working late. Thursday I have a meeting. How about Wednesday?"

"Wednesday I have a kickboxing tournament." Liz sounds bummed. "Thursday I have this thing with Josh and Friday night I'm hanging out with Mikayla."

"Who's Mikayla?" I ask as Paul comes dangerously close to burning my ear.

"She's that girl I met in Hawaii," Liz explains. "She's awesome, Kates. She's a freshman at NYU. Her family just moved to Los Angeles so she's out here for winter break. You have to meet her before she goes back."

Liz has been obsessed with getting in to New York University ever since she assisted me on the set of
Pretty Young Assassins
and began working with the film's producer. Now Liz's goal is to be a major Hollywood producer. Someday we want to team up and create our own production shingle. It could happen. Having a production company is the hot star trend these days.

"Well at least I'll get to see you this weekend at the Cinch luncheon," I say. Cinch is this high-end handbag company that stars drool over. Their annual invite-only luncheon is one of Liz's and my favorite events. The money from every Cinch handbag we buy goes to charity, which means I can spend and not feel guilty about borrowing from next month's allowance. "Maybe we can meet up with your friend afterward."

"Perfect," Liz says. "I'll call you later. I better get back to class before Principal P. catches me."

When I hang up and look in the mirror, my hair is full of big, bouncy curls that have been finished with a high gloss. The look works with the outfit Renee gave me in wardrobe. I'm wearing a Zac Posen denim skirt and a pale pink halter top. But together, neither my hair or my clothes seem right for a scene where Sam is supposed to come from just playing tennis. "Paul, this looks great, but isn't it a little dressy?" I ask tentatively as Shelly applies my foundation.

"I'll redo your hair before the first scene," Paul explains as he runs a comb through my curls one more time. "First you have the promos to shoot."

"Promos? What promos?" I ask.

"There you are," Nadine says as she strides into the room. I jump out of my chair and give her a tight hug. Nadine is more than just my longtime personal assistant. She's my Yoda. While Mom and Laney, my publicist, are consumed with me doing the best thing for my career, Nadine is the one concerned about me doing the right thing for
me
. She worries when I get caught up in work stuff, always has my best interests at heart, and keeps my life organized better than any assistant I know. I don't know what I'd do without her.

"Did you hear about the promos yet?" Nadine asks me. "That's why I'm late. I had to go pick up your script from Tom." Nadine's balancing a huge stack of papers on top of her bible (aka the binder that holds my schedule) and her personal cell phone and work BlackBerry are ringing and vibrating simultaneously, but at least she looks relaxed. She's wearing makeup, her collarbone-length red hair is pulled back in a ponytail, and she's sporting a black ribbed shirt and green cargo pants with her Adidas sneakers.

My face must look confused because Nadine adds: "Don't worry. Your lines are easy. The network wants you to shoot some clips about
FA
going off the air so that everyone and their mother tunes in. You're meeting Melli and Sky on the set in fifteen minutes." Nadine hands me a paper and I look at the brief script.

SARA: Will I finally get my act together?

PAIGE: Will I convince my family I know what's best for them?

SAMANTHA: The only way to find out is to tune in. Don't miss the final eight episodes of Family Affair.

SARA: You know you'll kick yourself if you do. (Paige looks at her) What? You know they will. (Faces the screen again) Don't miss what everyone is going to be talking about.

PAIGE: She's got a point.

SAMANTHA: Eight episodes left. Don't say we didn't warn you.

PAIGE, SAMANTHA, and SARA: Family Affair. Sundays at nine.

Gulp. EIGHT episodes left? Is that really all there is? I thought there were more, but I guess this makes sense. It takes us more than a week to shoot each episode and we only shoot through March even if the episodes air through May.

"These are your interview questions for
Seventeen.
" Nadine is still talking. "I asked them to send them over before your phoner. A lot of the questions are going to be about the end of
Family Affair
, but you can't give away plot info. After that you have a meet-and-greet with the winner of a studio contest and another phone interview. Then I thought we could do an SAT practice test. I assume you've been studying every night." She hands me a script. "And this is from Seth. He wants you to look over this TV pilot."

My head is spinning. Interview, meet-and-greet, SATs, meeting. Oops. I still have to call Seth back! "Nadine, you're really on your game for the first day back," I kid.

Nadine doesn't laugh. "I know," she says seriously. "You're looking at a new and improved Nadine. I made a New Year's resolution for myself while I was in Chicago: I'm going to be more than just your personal secretary from here on out. You need someone to guide you into a future without
FA
, and I can help you do that. I want you to reach your full potential both professionally and personally. No more slacking off! That's why I've developed a Kaitlin Burke game plan." She pats her binder and smiles. "We're going to get you a great SAT score so you have a college backup plan, and we're going to look at as many projects as possible to find the right one for the more grown-up you." She puts her arm around me. "Think of me as your own personal life coach."

Huh? I know I said I trust Nadine completely, but that doesn't sound anything like the Nadine I know. Nadine wants me to do well, but she's never been consumed with molding my life the way the rest of the team has. She's my friend first. I'm sure Nadine means well, but it's not like my life is hanging in the balance. Shouldn't I be able to achieve my potential on my own? Sure, I lose it sometimes -- okay, a lot -- but I don't need Nadine to babysit my life. I'm just going to ignore that last statement. Maybe she lost oxygen on her plane ride back to L.A. Or she could just be feeling the strain of the show ending, like I'm starting to. Suddenly I feel sad. I'm going to really miss everyone at
FA
.

"Are you done?" Sky appears in the doorway, snapping her gum. Her raven hair is curly and she's wearing a khaki Prada dress I recognize from their spring line.

Well, I'll miss
almost
everyone.

Okay, that's not nice. Sky and I have never been friends (She may play my fraternal twin, Sara, but she's more the Wicked Witch to my Glinda), but after twelve-plus years of working together, what happened at
FA
last fall helped us see eye to eye. This guest star named Alexis Holden wanted a permanent role on our show and when she was told the cast roster was full, she planted vicious lies about us in the press. I guess she thought Sky and I would blame each other for the bad karma and get ourselves fired. But for once, we worked together, and saved our jobs. Well, till the end of the season.

Shelly gives me a quick coat of Bobbi Brown lip gloss and I hurry after Sky. We walk the long corridor in silence for the first few minutes, which is really awkward.

"How was your break?" I ask, trying to be friendly. "We went to Turks and Caicos. It was beautiful. What did you do?"

"Stuff," Sky says stiffly.

I stop. "Sky, this is silly," I say. "After Alexis, we were getting along better, weren't we? We don't have to be BFs, but we can still be friendly on set."

Sky sighs. "I guess. I only have to see you for a few more months anyway."

Okay, a slight improvement -- for Sky. "Let's start over: How was your break?" I ask again.

"Super busy," Sky says, her eyes bright. "My agent set up a ton of meetings and I've got a few offers, but I'm not making any sudden moves."

Whoa. She's done all that already? It's January fifth!

"I heard you're going after that show based on the book,
I'd Hate You If I Didn't Love You
, about girls who live in a Chicago hotel. I'm meeting with them too."

I haven't even heard about that pilot and here Sky's already heard I'm interested? "I still have to meet with my agent. I'm stuck in
FA
land and don't want to leave," I joke. "Can you believe we're shooting our last eight episodes? I thought there were more."

Sky shakes her head. "Nope. The show is almost finito," she says without emotion. "You better get going if you want another show or a movie this spring."

"How are you so calm?" I'm shocked. "Aren't you upset about
FA
ending?"

Sky shrugs. "I'm over it already. I'm focusing on getting a new show that I can headline. You should do the same. I'm sure we'll be going after the same projects. Maybe that will be fun. I've always liked a good competition."

"You don't say?" I deadpan. We've reached the soundstage.

Melli, who plays Paige, our TV mom, is waiting for us on the other side. "Girls! How are you?" she asks and pelts us with kisses. "How were your vacations?"

"Great," we say in unison. It feels so good to see her. Melli is like my second mom. The one I can share my fears with. But that's going to change, isn't it? Soon I'm not going to talk to her every day. A lump begins to form in my throat.

Sky's phone rings and she looks at me triumphantly. "That must be my agent with another offer! I'll be right back." She runs off to answer it in private.

"What's wrong, Kaitlin?" Melli gives me a knowing look.

"I don't know." My voice is shaky. "I guess seeing you, being back here, filming this promo. The end of
FA
is really hitting me."

Melli hugs me. "It's okay to be upset. You've grown up here." She looks around. "
FA
is what you know and love, but that will change." She smiles.

"I know," I say, even though I'm not sure I believe that.

Tom Pullman, our creator/executive producer, walks over carrying a clipboard. His bald head is beaded with sweat and his black glasses are slightly fogged. Tom's wearing jeans and a T-shirt that says
The Affair is Almost Over.
"Why the long faces?"

"We're talking about the show ending," Melli tells him.

"Ah," Tom mumbles. "We can't deny it anymore, can we? Especially when we have these promos to shoot." He waves the dialogue at us and accidentally smacks Sky in the face as she walks back over. "Are you guys ready? These are twenty-second promos the network wants to air right away. They'll announce special episodes, show retrospectives, and count down to the final episode. Everyone is taping different ones so the network will be blanketed with
FA
reminders." Tom looks pleased. "Let's do a quick run-through and then we'll shoot. This shouldn't take more than half an hour."

Eight episodes.
Eight
episodes. I can't believe that's all that's left. I try not to think about it as I walk over to my mark. Tom sits at his director's chair, which is behind two flat-screen monitors showing different angles of our setup. The grips are already in place with the microphone, and two cameramen are focused on us. We rehearse the scene twice before we shoot.

"Promo number one, take one," Tom announces as we start taping.

"Will I finally get my act together?" Sky says with a sneaky grin.

"Will I convince my family I know what's best for them?" Melli smiles.

It's my turn. I stare into the camera. "The only way to find out is to tune in. Don't miss . . ." I can't remember my line! How did that happen? I did fine in rehearsal. "Don't miss . . ."

"Don't miss the final eight episodes of
Family Affair
," Tom reminds me. "Keep going. We're still rolling."

But I can't. I can't say it. I can't say "the final eight episodes." These promos, the thought of losing my on-set family; it all feels too real for the first day back to work. Sky already has a list of projects lined up and I haven't even looked at one. How is she so blasé about this? How is everyone so calm about
FA
going off the air? Doesn't anyone but me feel like this is all happening too fast? Don't they care that our lives are changing?

Tears drip down my cheeks. I start thinking about Dad's bad joke again. I'm not just losing my on-set family. I'm losing my steady paycheck, which shouldn't matter too much to a seventeen-year-old, but I'm one that has a roster of people on her payroll (including my parents). "Don't miss the final . . ." I begin to sob. "I'm sorry."