Seven Dirty Words (33 page)

8. Wasted Time

168 “It is said that every successful business”: George Mair,
Inside HBO: The Billion Dollar War Between HBO, Hollywood and the Home Video Revolution
(Dodd, Mead, 1988), 14.

169 “Comedians’ Bill of Rights”: Appearance on
20 Years of Comedy on HBO
, 1995.

171 “I was never quite sure of it”: Tony Orlando and Patsi Bale Cox,
Halfway to Paradise
(St. Martin’s Griffin 2003), 153.

171 “You can’t be the hot new guy”: Interview, Archive of American Television.

172-173 “It would seem to be an American Negro invention”: Ashley Montagu,
The Anatomy of Swearing
(Macmillan, 1967), 313.

173-174 “a classic case of burning the house”: Heins,
Not in Front of the Children,
101.

174 “because it is neither a sexual nor excretory organ”: Heins,
Not in Front of the Children,
102.

175 “would risk fine or lose its license”:
The Carlin Case
.

175 “of nothing but farting”: Lasar,
Pacifica Radio,
224.

176 “constitutionally sound but not very politically prudent”: Heins,
Not in Front of the Children,
103.

177 “that’s as far as I go”: Merrill, “
Playboy
Interview.”

177 “locked up in school taking sex education courses”: Nicholas von Hoffman, “Seven Dirty Words: A Cute Form of Censorship,”
Washington Post
, July 29, 1978.

177 “a good deal of street talk”: Les Brown, “Court’s Decision on Language Stirs Broadcasters,”
New York Times
, July 10, 1978.

178 “If you don’t like it”: Heins,
Not in Front of the Children,
109.

178 “those transgressions suddenly seemed like small potatoes”: Merrill, “
Playboy
Interview.”

180 “a trip to the cemetery”: Appearance on
Inside the Actors Studio
(Bravo), 2004.

181 “There’ll be a lot of concert footage”: “George Carlin’s Coming of Age,”
Harvard Crimson
, July 25, 1978.

183 “Frankly, I feel dated”: “George Carlin’s Coming of Age.”

183 “It was like a breathing-in period”:
Carlin on Comedy
.

184 “By the time 1980 arrived”: Steve LaBate, “George Carlin On . . . ,”
Paste
, September 25, 2007.

184 “My album career had faded”: Interview, Archive of American Television.

186 “If you were in Birmingham, Alabama”: Betsy Borns,
Comic Lives: Inside the World of American Stand-Up Comedy
(Fireside, 1987), 47.

9. America the Beautiful

192 “The orchestra chairs are piled”: Tom Shales, “‘Carlin at Carnegie,’ A Cherishable Touch,”
Washington Post
, January 8, 1983.

192 “HBO didn’t kick in for me until”: Interview, Archive of American Television.

193 “It was truly like a ton of bricks”:
A&E Biography: George Carlin.

194 “just fed your dissatisfaction”:
A&E Biography: George Carlin.

194 “Abraham Maslow said the fully realized man”: Dixit, “George Carlin’s Last Interview.”

195 “too sane for his own good”: Robert R. Provine,
Laughter: A Scientific Investigation
(Viking, 2000), 171.

202 “Kinison was the first guy I ever saw”: Cynthia True,
American Scream: The Bill Hicks Story
(HarperEntertainment, 2002), 40.

204 “I realized I had to raise my voice”: The Onion A.V. Club and Stephen Thompson, eds.,
The Tenacity of the Cockroach: Conversations with Entertainment’s Most Enduring Outsiders
(Three Rivers Press, 2002), 24-25.

10. Squeamish

206 “I heard a sound that, for children”: Britt Allcroft, “The George Carlin I Knew,”
Los Angeles Times
, June 26, 2008.

206 “always sounded as if he were”: Seinfeld, “Dying Is Hard.”

207 “I just felt terrific in that role”: Interview, Archive of American Television.

208 “nice, controlled anger”: Jefferson Graham, “Carlin Swaps Stand-Up for Sitcom,”
USA Today
, January 13, 1994.

208 “Carlin’s aging hipster character”: Todd Everett, “Unexpected Things Happen to George,”
Daily Variety
, January 14, 1994.

209 “He was my kind of guy”: Interview, Archive of American Television.

210 “I’m doing my best work”: Ronald L. Smith,
Who’s Who in Comedy
(Facts on File, 1992), 92.

211 “I knew I’d found my voice”: Interview, Archive of American Television.

215 “I’m very much a realist and a practical person”: Hochman, “
Playboy
Interview.”

216 “Carlin replaced Catholicism”: Kevin Smith, A God Who Cussed,”
Newsweek
, June 23, 2008.

216 “convincingly gruff and blue-collar portrayal”: Mick LaSalle, “Down and Out in New Jersey, Without Jennifer Lopez By His Side,”
San Francisco Chronicle
, March 26, 2004.

216 “so understated and devoid of sentimentality”: Stephanie Zacharek, “Jersey Girl,”
Salon
, March 26, 2004.

217 “a Gucci shirt or a McDonald’s hat”: Onion Club and Thompson,
Tenacity of the Cockroach
, 23-24.

218 “it was a little embarrassing to be placed ahead of Lenny Bruce”: Joseph P. Kahn, “From 7 Words to Endless Ideas,”
Boston Globe
, July 20, 2006.

219 “I find out where they draw the line”:
Make ’Em Laugh
.

220 “it’s not only bad prose and poetry”:
www.georgecarlin.com
.

220 “If you’re born in America”: Appearance on
Tavis Smiley
(PBS), April 8, 2004.

221 “just one more bullshit political philosophy”: George Carlin,
Napalm & Silly Putty
(Hyperion, 2001), 261.

221 “I belong to no party”: Teachout,
The Skeptic,
236.

221 “I read somewhere that every atom in us”: James A. Haught, “God, Life, and Avocado-Colored Kitchen Appliances: A Chat with George Carlin,”
Free Inquiry
(Summer 1999).

224 “picketers and counter-picketers”: Phil Grecian, “Carlin’s Complaints Not Shocking, for Him,”
Topeka Capital-Journal
, October 5, 2001.

224 “Riffs included suicide”: Norm Clarke, “Dark Carlin,”
Las Vegas Review-Journal
, December 4, 2004.

224 “punch up the writing”: Richard Cusick, “High Times Interview: The Clown’s Dark Genius,”
High Times
, November 1997.

224 “Some of the guys in there”: Hochman, “
Playboy
Interview.”

225 “the most dispiriting, soul-deadening city on earth”: Richard Abowitz, “George Carlin Hates Vegas,”
Los Angeles Times
, August 13, 2007.

226 “an apocalypse that is part Steven King”: Joshua David Mann, “The Complete Carlin: What You Can Learn by Watching 800 Minutes of George Carlin,”
Slate
, June 26, 2008.

226 “try to outwit the inner censor”: Jim Holt,
Stop Me If You’ve Heard This: A History and Philosophy of Jokes
(W.W. Norton, 2008), 70.

226 “There are a lot of comics working forty years”: Jacques Steinberg, “Refusing to Coast on 7 Infamous Words,”
New York Times
, November 4, 2005.

228 “Thank you, Mr. Twain”: Paul Harris, “George Carlin to Take Twain Prize,”
Variety
, June 18, 2008.

228 “There’s always hope for comedians”: Hochman, “
Playboy
Interview.”

Kicker

231 “the filthiest piece of legislation”: Steven Pinker
The Stuff of Thought: Language As a Window into Human Nature
(Penguin Books, 2007), 360.

232 “to be fruitful and multiply”: Pinker,
Stuff of Thought,
20.

232 “the word that’s probably the Queen Mother”: Glenn Garvin, “Carlin May Be Gone, But the Flap Over His Seven Words Isn’t,”
Miami Herald
, June 24, 2008.

232 “People have been telling me”: Joan Biskupic, “Supreme Court Ruling Bans Broadcast ‘Fleeting Expletives,’”
USA Today
, April 28, 2009.

233 “What can I say about George Carlin”:
The Eleventh Annual Kennedy Center Mark Twain Prize
(PBS), 2009.

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

The one thing George Carlin took seriously was refusing to take anything seriously. In making a case for his comic philosophy, I am indebted to the many friends and acquaintances who shared their memories of him with me. Particular thanks to Jenni Matz, Ken Harris, Nick Zaino, David Tillotson, Trevon Blondet, and John Lewis Puff for their help with source materials.

Thanks to Paul Bresnick, my agent, for helping me cast a wide net. Thanks to Ben Schafer, my editor, for his enthusiasm and encouragement. Thanks again to Billie Porter for her keen eye.

I would like to thank Kelly Carlin-McCall for her kindness and willingness to make some room on the shelf.

Much like standup comedy, writing is a solitary pursuit, but I’ve been blessed with many funny people to brighten my life. In particular, old friends David Marmer and Jay Ablondi have always been comedians without going pro. My friend Jeremy Cowan carries a big shtick. And Rick D’Elia is, in fact, the coolest cousin-in-law.

My father, Al Sullivan, who was born five years to the day before Carlin, still loves to say that he raised an R-rated kid. More importantly, he gave me a critical survival skill: a cracked sense of humor. And my wonderful wife, Monica, and our three beautiful boys—Sam, Will, and Owen—remind me every day that nothing beats a smile and a laugh.

INDEX

ABC

Abortion

ACLU.
See
American Civil Liberties Union

The Act of Creation
(Koestler)

Advertising

Agnew, Spiro

Ajaye, Franklin

Albee, Edward

Alexander, Shana

Ali, Muhammad

Allen, Fred

Allen, Steve

All in the Family

Altman, Bob

American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU)

Americathon
(film)

Amsterdam, Morey

Anderson, Robert

The Andy Griffith Show

Apt. 2C

Arbogast, Bob

Arbogast, Peter

Ass

Atlantic Records

Atomic Age

Authority

Authors League of America

Away We Go

Aykroyd, Dan

Back in Town
(HBO special)

Ballou, Wally

Banner, Bob

Barris, Chuck

Bastard

Bearey, Mary.
See
Carlin, Mary (mother)

Beat Generation

Becker, Murray

Belafonte, Harry

Belushi, John

Bennett, Tony

Benny, Jack

Berle, Marshall

Berle, Milton

Berman, Shelley

Bernacchi, Donald

Biafra, Jello

Bible

Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure
(film)

Birth control

Bitch

Black, Hugo

Black, Lewis

Blackmun, Harry

Blair, Dennis

Bob and Ray

The Bob Newhart Show

Book, Stephen

Borge, Victor

Brain Droppings
(Carlin)

Brennan, Bill

Brennan, William J.

Brenner, David

Brezner, Larry

Brinkley, David

Broadcast Decency Enforcement Act

Brooks, Albert

Brown, James

Brown, Oscar, Jr.

Bruce, Lenny

Buckley, Lord

Burger, Warren E.

Burnett, Carol

Burns, Biff

Burns, George

Burns, Jack

Burns & Carlin at the Playboy Club Tonight
(album) (Carlin and Burns)

The Button-Down Mind of Bob Newhart
(album) (Newhart)

Buttons, Red

Butz, Earl