Sewn with Joy (38 page)

Authors: Tricia Goyer

BOOK: Sewn with Joy

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J
oy rushed home during the lunch break at the studio, eager to see her father. They'd celebrated a simple Thanksgiving, and then her parents had been gone a few days days while he was in Orlando for treatments, and she missed them. Her sister Hope wasn't able to arrive from Kentucky as she had planned, and the house seemed emptier without
Dat
. Thankfully, other Amish women had taken over the cooking for the studio while
Mem
was gone, but she guessed
Mem
would soon be back in the swing of things.

Joy entered the house, passing through the kitchen and rushing by the stacks of borrowed dishes on their tableâthings they'd be using in a couple of weeks for Hope and Lovina's double wedding. Soon there would be food to buy and prepare and guests to welcome from up north, but all those tasks paled in comparison to
Dat
's health.

Dat
's wrinkled face brightened as she entered the living room. “It was a hard few days at the hospital, but things are better now,” he called to her. “It's
gut
to be home.
Gut
to see you.”

He patted the sofa beside him, and she sat down. The most recent edition of the
Budget
was open and spread over the armrest. She picked up the paper and folded it, placing it on the table next to the lamp.

“I want to thank you, Joy, for all you've done.”
Dat
's voice was low, soft. “I know how much you have sacrificed. And I want you to know that although I'm thankful, I worry you've made the wrong choice.”

“
Dat
, what do you mean?”

“Even with the best results these treatments will extend my life by only a few years. I'm afraid what you've given upâyour relationship with Matthewâwill impact your future for much longer.”

“Oh,
Dat
, don't you see? I wanted to do this for you, and God's been changing me in the process too.”

He ran a hand down his beard. “What do you mean?”

“If this hadn't happened, and if I hadn't worked on the set, I would have continued to believe life was about how well I performed, instead of understanding that I need to lean on God day by day.”

Mem
entered the living room, and from the soft smile on her face, Joy knew she'd overheard the conversation.

“It's
gut
to be home. It's
gut
to see brightness to your eyes once again.”
Mem
glanced around. “I remember when we first moved here. I didn't believe this place would ever feel as welcoming as our Ohio home, but you know what? It does.”

Joy looked around at the simple sofa with the crocheted afghan over its back, the two recliners, and the small tables.
Mem
's touches were all around the roomâher basket of yarn, her hurricane lamp on the table, and her small hutch with china. Joy's eyes darted to the stitched sampler on the wall. She'd made it years before from a kit she'd received as a Christmas gift. It had an Amish couple,
their small house, and flowers. The saying on it read, “No matter what, no matter where, it's always home if love is there.”

The stitching wasn't perfect, but she knew why
Mem
had hung it. This wasn't their home in Ohio, but as long as there was love and family, it was home. And Joy knew right now the best way she could show her father love was by not asking too many questions.

Instead she needed to wait for whatever news he had to share. She needed to offer to sit and listen for a while, even if she had a long list of things to do. And she needed to remind him that the choice she made was God's best plan for her, just as much as it was for him.

The peace Joy had found at home vanished as soon as she entered the studio lot once again. She arrived early to do her consulting work, and today she had yet another small part in the episode. She tried to forget that she would be on people's television screens all over the country in not too many months, and she tried to pretend she was just doing it to spend time with her new friends, but it didn't work. Joy looked at the script, and the words danced before her eyes. The nerves in her neck felt taut, as if turning her head to the side would cause them to snap.

Next to her, Alicia nibbled on a carrot stick and smiled in self-satisfaction. Joy's
mem
was at home, preparing a Country Brunch, doubling the normal recipe that fed twenty people. The truth was, Joy would rather be there helping
Mem
cook than sitting here and studying lines.

Joy rubbed her forehead and her brows. “I don't understand how you do this. How you enjoy it.”

“I love it. I enjoy stepping into a character, but it wasn't always that way. I used to feel like I was going to throw up as I waited for
the director to call
action
, but then I just started picturing myself as Sandra Bullock.”

“Sandra who?”

Laughter spilled from Alicia's lips. “Wow, it's so strange that you don't know who these people are. You don't know Sandra Bullock, honestly?”

Joy shrugged.

“What about Taylor Swift, Johnny Depp, or Brad Pitt?”

“I can't say I do, but they all have wonderful last names.”

“Okay, then my tip won't work for you, but just act successful. Act like you know what you're doing, like you have confidence, and like you were made to be in this scene at this moment.”

“Yes, I understand now. I simply have to act like you.”

Surprise registered on Alicia's face. “What?”

“I've seen you study. I've watched you get focused for a scene. You take this seriously. You pour yourself into your work, and it shows.”

Alicia placed a hand over her heart. Tears filled her eyes. “I didn't know you've been watching me.”

“Yes. I have, and even though you said you've learned a lot from me, I've learned a lot from you too. There's a Bible verse that says, âAnd whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men.' You are new in your relationship with God, and the reasons behind your acting might change. But I believe by using the talents God's given you, you've been honoring Him. We always honor Him when we become the person He designed us to be. God designed you a certain way for a purpose.”

“It's strange. God designed me to act and you to sew, and in His perfect plan He knew that's what would bring us together.”

“It's strange and wonderful. It's hard to understand, and I suppose that's part of the mystery of it.”

“What do you mean?”

“I used to believe I had one path in life. To live as a good Amish woman, develop my natural skills, and become a good wife and mother. But the path isn't as straightforward as it seems.”

“So do you think this television thing is just a side path, and when our filming ends you'll end up back on the straight and narrow path?”

“No, I don't think of this as a side path. I think of it as the path God needed me to be on to make me humble, to lead me to depend on Him. I've lived in the Amish community my whole life, and I believe it's perfectly possible to live a good life without getting God involved too much, but I'm thankful that I didn't fall victim to that way of thinking. I may have lost my chance at a husband and children, but I have a relationship with God that is moreâ”

“Do you really think that?” Alicia interrupted. “That you've given up your chance of marriage and children because of this?”

“It's a fear, butâ¦” Tears sprang to her eyes. She lowered her head. “I suppose I won't knowâ¦”

Alicia reached over and gave her a hug, whispering into her ear. “It's just like a good screenplayâyou never know if there's a twist in the plot coming up that will hurl your characters in a new direction.”

Joy nodded, but her friend's words didn't help. She didn't want a new plot twist. She wanted what she had always wanted, but now with this new relationship with God added to that. She just wasn't sure if it could happen. Deep down she knew God's path was the right one, no matter how much her heart ached for Matthew and the life they could have had.

“I just don't understand.” Alicia's words broke off her thoughts. “Why did you do it, then? If you honestly think you're risking your future with Matthew, why did you stay? Was it the money?”

“No. It wasn't the money. Yes, we are using it to pay for my father's medical bills, but that was never it.”

“Then what was it?”

Joy focused on Alicia's gaze.

“It was me, wasn't it? I told you how some of the most important people in my life have walked out on me. But you didn't. You stayed.”

“You started asking questions about God. I saw something in your eyes. It was hope, I think.”

“And you were afraid that if you walked away, I would harden my heart again?”

“Yes, I suppose that was it. Harden it not just to people but to God.” Joy smoothed her skirt, as if trying to press out the wrinkles with her hands. “Deep down I believe Jesus wanted me to show you His heart, Alicia. I will no doubt fail you sometime, but He never will. He has never left your side, and He will never walk away.”

The words of encouragement slipped from her lips with gentleness, but Alicia's eyes widened, and a shocking look of fear crossed her face. Tears filled her eyes, and her mouth dropped open.

“Iâ¦I've got to go.” Without saying anything else, Alicia rose and hurried back toward the studio set.

Joy watched her go, unsure of what had just happened. She thought over her words.
“Jesus wanted me to show you His heartâ¦ He has never left your side, and He will never walk away.”
She expected that to bring hope to her friend, not fear.

Lord, I don't know what's going on, but You do. Be with Alicia now. I've told her about Your love, but only You can show it to her. Show her in a way that she'll know it's from You.

Joy blew out a breath and imagined it carrying her prayer up to heaven like dandelion fluffs on the wind. She and Alicia had different lives, but there was one thing she knew. Alicia needed God just as much as she did.

Maybe Elizabeth was rightâmaybe she'd never see the influence she made on this side of heaven. But then again, maybe she would. Maybe God would grant her a glimpse of what He could do in the lives of those who dared to step out and seek God. It was what she hoped for most now. He'd shown up in her life, and He'd show up in Alicia'sâif she dared to let Him.