And it scared the hell out of her.
What was it? Softness, a deep, needy sort of craving for Simon, but that wasn’t a surprise since he was so craveable. But it wasn’t just for sex. Or for his company, although she was having more fun with him that she’d ever had with anyone else.
Was it because he made her feel safe? That wasn’t a feeling she’d had before in her life—nor had she realized she wanted it.
“What’s wrong?” he murmured against her hair, his words slurry with sleep.
“Nothing.”
“You got all tense. What’s up?”
Had anyone in her life ever noted her emotions so clearly? If they had, they’d never cared enough to push past her defenses. Her initial reaction was to sidestep. She didn’t share emotions.
Opening her mouth to do just that, she was shocked to hear herself ask, “What’s the most important thing in your life?”
Suddenly his body didn’t feel all relaxed and sleepy next to her. He didn’t tense, but he definitely came to attention. “Most important? Besides making sure we repeat that little cake trick sometime soon?”
“Ha. No, I mean, I used to think family was the most important thing in my life. But then I left, and tried to shut that door. And I didn’t know what was important anymore.”
Did that make her sound as lost as she felt? Probably. Maya was glad it was dark so Simon couldn’t see how vulnerable she knew she looked.
“Family is important. Yours shaped you. Even if you’re estranged from them it’s still obvious how strong the ties are between all of you.”
“Are you close with your family?” she asked, both because she really was curious, and to change a subject that she didn’t know how to deal with.
“No.”
“That’s it? Just no?” She tilted her head back to face him, even though the room was too dark to see his features. “Not close because you’re estranged like I am? Or not close for some other reason?”
His hesitation was a physical thing. She was sure he would ignore her question. But then she felt him shrug.
“My dad was gone mostly. Traveling when I was little, but just gone by the time I was eight. He wasn’t much interested in having a family.”
Eight. When he stopped having hope. Maya was suddenly glad the dark kept her tears from showing.
“But you had your mom?”
“Sure. She was there. She spent a lot of time pissed at the old man. I don’t blame her. But all that time she spent being pissed, it pretty much took up all her energy. What was left, she needed to support us. She filled the hole he left with a lot of business. Her job, her friends.”
But not her son.
Maya’s heart broke for that little boy, abandoned by both parents. That he was such an amazing man, so loving and strong, was amazing.
The upbringing he described was foreign to her. Maya barely held back a shiver, it sounded so cold and empty. So sad. Her arms tightened around his waist as if she could warm him now, and take away some of that pain.
“I think that’s why my job means everything to me,” he mused quietly, obviously lost in his own discovery and working it out aloud. “It’s all I’ve got. All I have to show my worth, you know? I never felt special, or even useful, growing up. Now it’s different.”
Maya’s heart ached for him. And for herself, because hearing how rough his upbringing had been made her realize just how lucky hers was. Thanks to her father, she’d never doubted her worth, never for a second wondered if she was special or not.
But Simon had learned to focus on the externals. That was probably why he’d gone into investments. Money was a good measuring stick.
So was love, though.
Maya had never doubted that she’d fall in love some day. That she’d feel the deep, wonderful commitment that her parents had enjoyed. But she hadn’t thought it’d feel this scary.
So scary, she wasn’t ready to share. Not in words. Not yet.
Maybe not for a long, long time.
So, instead, she shared in the only way she could.
With gentle kisses and soft caresses.
And while most of her was sure Simon was just enjoying the ride, a tiny part of her heart hoped he heard her vow, and that maybe, just maybe someday, he’d return her love.
11
THIS TIME, MAYA WASN’T surprised to wake up alone.
She curled into the pillow next to her, inhaling the faint scent of Simon. Earthy spice, it made her smile and giggle like a giddily deflowered virgin.
He was amazing. They were amazing together.
Afraid she was one giggle away from being a cliché, she let go of the pillow and stretched. Her satisfied body was well lubed and relaxed as it slid over the soft sheets.
She wondered briefly where Simon had gotten away to, but unlike the previous day was sure of two things.
One, he wasn’t driving her car since she’d hid the keys.
And two, he wasn’t having sex with Lilah since she was sure she’d worn him out. Besides, as he’d said, a man didn’t go from incredible to inedible. Maya had enough faith in Simon and what was growing between them to believe he wasn’t lying to her.
The bed made a tiny bounce as Dottie jumped onto the mattress and butted her head against Maya’s arm. Maya obediently offered her an ear rub and asked, “What do you think of him, Dottie? I’m afraid I might be getting stupid here. Falling…”
Panic zipped through her body. Muscles tense, her stomach dropped. She couldn’t even say the words.
“Distraction,” she decided aloud. “I just need distraction. After the sexual glow wears off, I’ll worry about the rest of this…stuff.”
Distraction. Her eyes a little wild, Maya looked around the room. Her gaze landed on the drawer she’d locked her computer into and she gave a relieved sigh.
She had research to do.
Quickly, she scooted naked from the bed and grabbed her key ring from the potted fern by the window, then opened the drawer and pulled out her computer.
Back in bed, she opened her laptop and resumed the search she’d started the previous day, this time hacking into her father’s private bank account and home computer.
Two minutes later, her screen froze.
A red banner flashed, then spun like a top before zooming onto the monitor.
You can do better than that,
it read.
Maya couldn’t help herself. She started laughing.
Then the banner changed. Her laughter faded and she sighed as tears filled her eyes.
Penalty required for poor performance.
Penalty required. Tobias hadn’t been a big believer in punishment. At least, not the normal parental kind. Instead, he’d taught his kids to talk, charm or con their way out of trouble. He called it their penalty. If they succeeded, they walked away from whatever they’d done wrong. If they failed, they paid whatever price he deemed appropriate. At fourteen, Maya had backed his Ferrari into the garage door and gotten away with it with a teary-eyed story about saving a kitten who’d fallen from a tree. Another time, she’d been grounded for a month for getting a C in algebra because she hadn’t studied, and had no clever excuse.
She was so busted.
An hour later, she parked in front of her childhood home. Resting both arms across the steering wheel, she inspected the three-story Victorian, with its stately trees winter bare, and the gardens she knew would be a watercolor riot of scented beauty in three months.
A painful sort of homesickness washed over her like the flu, making her a little woozy, a little weak and a whole lot nauseated. She didn’t need this. Or, actually, she didn’t want to need this. But coming home was making her realize just how much she really did want to do just that—come home.
As if he had special instincts, or more likely had been watching for her, Tobias swung the front door open.
Time to pay the piper.
Maya took her time leaving the car and making her way up the walkway. Both to irritate her father, who because he only wore a T-shirt with his jeans, was clearly getting cold. And because, yes, she was nervous.
“Welcome home, Pumpkin,” he said when she reached the porch.
“I’m here to pay the penalty,” she said, trying to act aloof as she swept past his open arms with her chin held high. “Not to play prodigal daughter makes nice.”
“Well, there’s certainly nothing nice about your attitude or your rudeness, now is there?” he said, after a second of standing there, arms raised. With a huff, he shut the door and gave her a chiding look. “You’ve been taught better manners than that, Maya.”
“I’ve been taught so many things, father. Shall we go over the list?” she suggested, making her way down the long hallway on auto-pilot. It was the same. Six years since she’d been here, and it looked just like it had when she left.
A part of her reveled in that. Another part of her wanted to weep. She’d missed it. Missed him. She’d planned to come home, prove to herself that she was no longer Daddy’s little girl. To let go of the past so she could get on with her life.
This was so not working out how she’d hoped.
“We can skip the list,” Tobias said, gesturing toward his den. Maya glanced at the door where he ran his kingdom and walked right past it toward the living room. As she stepped down into the lush carpet of the sunken space, she felt like she was stepping back in time.
“You haven’t changed anything,” she whispered. The leather sectional was still in the same spot. The fluffy red pillows she’d picked out when she was fifteen and playing with the idea of interior design were tossed as randomly as they’d been the day she’d brought them home. The silk flower arrangements, the throw blanket, even the lopsided remote caddy Gabriel had made, they were all in the same place.
Suspicion started brewing in the back of Maya’s brain. She gave the room one last look around, then turned to face her father.
“Well?” she challenged. Her chin jutted high and she crossed her arms over her chest. “What’s the penalty?”
A smile played around the corners of his mouth, but he didn’t call her on the juvenile defiance.
“Sit,” he said.
Maya gave him a long look, but finally sank into the couch.
“Isn’t this nice,” he said as he took his traditional seat in the recliner. “You, back in Black Oak. Having you here, at home. Your fingers poking into my private business.”
“Clumsy fingers if you caught on that fast.”
“Let’s just say I was watching for them.”
“You knew I’d hack your accounts?”
“I suspected you’d be curious when you heard the inevitable rumors.”
Maya nodded, not surprised. “And are the rumors true? Were you involved in drugs? Are you running some dirty crime ring right here in town?”
Dark eyes met gold. Maya held her breath. For all her anger, all her big talk, he was still her father. The man who’d raised her to show respect and had once washed her mouth out with soap for smarting off. She swallowed, hard, suddenly tasting the acrid flavor of Ivory on her tongue.
Then Tobias inclined his head. Either because he figured it was a legit question. Or because he read her mind and was glad she’d remembered the pecking order here.
“You know the rules, Pumpkin. Never dirty your own nest. Black Oak is sacred. It’s supposed to stay clean.”
Legit question, it was. More relieved than she’d admit aloud, Maya finally relaxed. She curled her feet under her tush and pulled a pillow onto her lap to play with the fur. “Someone is setting you up?”
“You’re quick.” His smile was filled with the same pride he’d shown when she’d won the regional spelling championship and when she’d hacked the account of a known pedophile in the neighboring town and stolen her first ten thousand. “Yes, it’s a setup. I wasn’t sure at first if it was directed at me or just happenstance. But after Caleb arrested that useless Jeff Kendall, it became pretty clear that something bigger is going on.”
Maya pressed her lips together as her mind raced. She didn’t want to care. But someone was out to get her father. And while it was one thing for her to harbor resentment and anger toward him, it was something else entirely for someone to try and set him up. Tiny flames of fury started licking their way through her system.