Authors: Jamie Begley
Tags: #Romance, #Military, #Contemporary, #Literature & Fiction
“I’ll go get changed,” Lily said, heading straight to the restroom. It didn’t take her long to get changed, but Shade still beat her, already working out on the weights.
He paused when she entered the room, his eyes going to her new workout outfit. Shade didn’t say anything, but Lily could tell he didn’t like her choice of clothes.
The black leggings were several sizes too large, and the top was spandex but was also too large with long sleeves.
Shade placed his weights down. “Come here.”
Lily moved toward him.
Shade spent the next hour with her weight training, making sure the hand that had been broken started with minimal weight.
“Two more, Lily.” She was lying on the bench, lifting weights, when Shade’s hand went to the inside of her thigh.
“Keep your legs straight.” Shade’s hand guided her leg to where he wanted it.
Lily stiffened, almost dropping the weight.
“Keep your arms steady.” His hand glided up the length of her arm, steadying it.
Lily forced herself to straighten her trembling arms then almost dropped the weights when his hand lay flat on her stomach. The thin material of her shirt was no barrier against the warmth of his hand.
“Breathe, Lily.”
Lily took a deep breath then released it. She was beginning to feel surrounded by Shade.
“That’s enough for today.” Shade straightened, standing above her.
Lily felt him take the weights from her as she hastily got to her feet. She was thankful that the awkward experience was over.
“Two days a week we’ll work on weight training. The other three we’ll work on your defense moves.”
“That sounds good,” Lily said, not looking at him as she picked up her workout bag. “I appreciate your help, Sir.” She made herself refer to him the way he expected before she went to the door, not waiting for him, but she was very aware of him watching her as she made her way to her car.
Lily drove home, debating calling an end to their workout sessions. Her hand constantly snapped the rubber band against her wrist all the way home.
At dinnertime that evening, she was loading the dishwasher when Beth gasped. “Lily.”
She looked at her sister, seeing her horrified look, then looked down at her wrist. It was an angry red and was becoming inflamed.
“What have you done to yourself?” Beth exclaimed, becoming upset with tears in her eyes.
“Nothing,” Lily demurred, continuing to load the dishwasher. “I hadn’t even noticed that I was doing it.”
“Something must have upset you. What was it?” Beth asked.
“Nothing. Honestly, I don’t understand it, either,” Lily said truthfully.
Beth took a deep breath. “Okay, but next time be more careful.”
“I will.” Lily didn’t miss the concerned look that passed between Razer and Beth.
She had to get herself back under control, she thought, glancing down at her wrist. Whatever was triggering her anxiety had to be faced. She couldn’t keep avoiding it. Sooner or later, she was going to have to face her fears. Hopefully, she wouldn’t lose her mind when she did.
Upstairs, she changed into her pajamas, turning off her light but leaving the bathroom light on.
The wind blew against the window and Lily shivered. The wind was picking up, yet she didn’t worry about it. There had been no storm warnings posted.
Snuggling under her covers, she curled onto her side, letting her mind go back to the dinner that evening. Beth had looked so happy with Razer. The love Beth and Razer shared was special. Lily knew she would never find happiness like her sister; however, she would be satisfied if she could find someone to share her life with and have children. She wanted several children, though she feared the likelihood of finding the perfect father didn’t exist.
Lily was certain that everything that she loved was eventually destroyed with the exception of Beth. She was the one constant in her life. If she was ever taken away, Lily didn’t know what she would do. She was the one person that kept her rooted and sane.
Lily knew that even when she was in college, all she had to do was call and Beth would be there.
God help her if the day ever came that she wasn’t.
Chapter 4
She was able to calm her nerves by Friday, relieved that the weekend was almost here. The day was spent working steadily. She didn’t even let eating lunch with Shade faze her. Lily had managed to start loosening up around him slightly since she was spending so much extra time with him every day.
Jewell and Bliss were laughing and cracking up, making jokes as they worked next to each other. Lily noticed that Georgia didn’t say anything to the two women; in fact, she seemed to be trying to get friendly with them. While both women were always friendly to her, neither made any real attempt to become better acquainted.
After lunch, Lily went into the back room and was trying to straighten the seeds when several packs spilled out. Leaning over, she was attempting to put them back when the door opened and Gaige came in.
“Need some help?”
“I think I’ve got it under control,” Lily replied. She always felt uncomfortable when he was around. He inevitably managed to make her feel dirty when he looked at her.
Before she could rise up, his hand slid under the hem of her dress, sliding against her bottom. Lily dropped the seeds she was holding to the floor, jerking away from his touch.
She didn’t say anything as she quickly went to the door.
“Hey, I was just joking,” he uttered.
As soon as the door clicked behind her, she started shaking; however, her hand managed to slide into the pocket of her dress to pull out her phone. Praying silently to herself, she pressed Beth’s number and put the phone to her ear, aware of Bliss, Jewell and Georgia looking at her strangely.
Shakily, she managed to begin the walk to her workstation, becoming more and more upset that Beth wasn’t answering. She needed Beth when the darkness was about to hit. Beth could talk to her and calm her down.
Shade was standing by Train in his office, but she noticed his eyes were on her. She ran her fingers through her hair as a whimper passed her lips. She needed Beth!
The door opened and Razer’s familiar figure walked through as another whimper unconsciously passed her lips. She took a step toward him.
“Lily!” Lily stopped, her hands going to her hair. “Lily, come here. Now!” Lily’s feet changed direction and she moved toward Shade, trying not to whimper again as both men moved out of the doorway.
“Go take your chair.” Lily wanted Razer if she couldn’t have Beth. He would get Beth for her.
“I need Beth,” she managed to get out between chattering teeth.
“Go take your chair,” Shade repeated, his expression hard. He took her jaw in his hand. “What did I tell you about me repeating instructions?”
“Shade?” Razer’s concerned voice was behind Lily’s back, but she couldn’t turn to him because Shade still had her jaw in his grip.
“I will handle this, Razer.” Lily shivered at the look Shade gave Razer. Shade’s hand dropped from her face.
She heard Train mutter, “I’ll take care of it,” before Shade came inside the office and shut the door.
“Go stand in the corner, Lily.” Shade’s hard voice kept the darkness from taking over.
“Now,” he snapped.
Lily’s feet immediately took her to the corner where she stood, facing the office, while Shade took his seat back at the desk and resumed doing his paperwork as if she wasn’t there.
Lily didn’t know what to do or how to feel. She took a deep, shuddering breath, leaning her head on the wall.
“Stand up straight.” Shade didn’t take his eyes off his paperwork, pushing a few buttons on his computer before making more notes. Lily straightened, her hand going to her wrist.
“No.” This time his eyes looked up, daring her to snap the rubber band. Her hand reluctantly fell to her side. Concentrating on what she could and couldn’t do, she eventually drew her mind away from Gaige touching her. The dual pressures of remaining straight and not snapping the rubber band were not letting her focus on the feel of his hand under her dress.
Lily’s eyes found the clock, watching it as the minutes ticked by.
It was weird, yet she felt herself gradually letting the stress of the encounter leave her body, feeling safe in the enclosed office with Shade.
“Come here, Lily.” Lily didn’t hesitate; she went to his side as he pushed his chair back from his desk. His hand reached out to snag her hand, jerking her down to sit on his thigh.
Lily started to go wild.
“Sit still.”
Lily quit fighting, sitting stiffly on his thigh. Shade didn’t attempt to touch her further, his hand going back to the computer screen, moving the cursor to begin going through the email.
“The Farthings ordered three more cases of MREs. I think they’re planning for World War III.” He went down the emails, checking them off one by one. Sometimes he would make a remark, sometimes he wouldn’t.
“So what happened to get you upset?” Shade finally asked as he scrolled down the list for the next email.
Lily, reading the email requesting survival kits, told him without thinking. “When I was in the back room, Gaige came in. I was bent over the refrigerator and he slid his hand underneath my dress.”
“I would be upset if he tried to touch my ass, too,” Shade remarked, still working and not looking at her.
Lily laughed. She couldn’t believe it, but she laughed.
“Did he try to stop you from leaving the room?” Shade probed.
“No. I probably overreacted. I know how silly I sound.”
“You didn’t overreact. He had no business touching you,” Shade said, his hand going to her hip, adjusting her so that she sat more comfortably on his leg. Several more minutes passed.
“Are you all right now?”
“Yes. Thanks, Shade.” She stood up, feeling ridiculous for freaking out over something that women had dealt with for years in the workplace.
Lily opened the door, going back to work, aware that everyone’s eyes were on her with Georgia throwing her annoyed glances.
“Are you okay?” Bliss and Jewell both stopped by her workstation as they left.
“I’m fine. I just overreacted.”
“Do you need anything before we leave?” Bliss gave her a friendly smile.
Lily hesitated before she asked, “Would you mind getting me a number four green bean pack from the refrigerator?” She felt like such a coward for asking Bliss.
“No problem,” Bliss said, turning to go to the back room to get the item.
“I’ll handle it, Bliss. You two go on up to the club.” Lily watched as Shade walked up to them. The two women left, giving her a sympathetic look.
“Go get the seeds. I’ll wait here,” Shade told her.
Lily almost refused but knew she was being silly. Gaige hadn’t been around for the rest of the afternoon, and she had gone into the room numerous times before without incident.
She went to the room, passing a gloating Georgia who was really beginning to wear on her nerves. She was mildly relieved when she heard Shade tell her she could leave as she passed.
Lily hurried and opened the refrigerator and found the seeds quickly, closing the door and going back to her station. Shade watched as she finished her order while the rest of the workers left for the day. When Lily had completed the order and cleaned her workstation for Monday, she was relieved that the day was finally at an end.
“Go get your bag while I lock up,” Shade ordered.
“But I thought—” Lily protested. She really wanted to go home.
Shade tilted his head to the side in question.
Resigned, Lily gave in. “I’ll go get my bag.” Lily had thought he would let her slide on working out tonight because of the incident; however, she should have known better. The hard man didn’t have an inch of leeway in him. Her conscience argued with her over how he had managed to calm her from a full-fledged panic attack.
Grabbing her bag, she followed Shade to the basement and went to get changed. Shade was warming up on the mat when she returned and Lily sank to the mat to begin stretching. Shade watched her before standing up and turning on the music. He hadn’t turned the music on during their previous workouts, so Lily looked at him in question, yet Shade didn’t say anything, moving her into position to begin her defense training. He worked on her kick for several minutes, becoming irritated when she didn’t connect with him.
Lily began to become distracted; the noise from upstairs was loud. She could tell it was a large group of people from the voices filtering down the steps. She could hear the feminine and male laughter. Lily understood now why Shade had turned on the music to try to disguise the noise from upstairs.
“Pay attention, Lily. If you used more strength, we would have been done ten minutes ago and I would be upstairs drinking a cold beer.”
Probably with one of the women by his side
, Lily thought, kicking out sharply and managing to catch Shade on the side of his thigh.
“About fucking time.” Shade smiled at her proudly.
Lily was amazed at herself and contrite at the same time. “Did I hurt you?”
“No, Lily, you didn’t hurt me. Next time a dick like Gaige tries to touch your ass again, try that move.”
Lily grinned back. “Okay.”
“We’re done for the day.”
“Thanks, Sir.” Lily was finding it easier to address him as Sir when they worked out.
Going for her bag, she picked it up before she hesitated for a moment, twisting the handle of the bag in her hand. “Thanks for getting me to go get the seeds. I would have just avoided the room.”
“I know. Lily, let’s work on getting rid of the old fears before adding new ones. You’re completely safe at the factory and here.”
“I know that.”
“Good. I’ll see you Sunday.”
“All right.” Lily left with a spring in her step and a smile at her accomplishment. For the first time, she was beginning to feel herself capable of taking control of her physical well-being.
* * *
Lily fielded Beth’s concern when she arrived home. Beth was hesitant to leave her that evening, but Lily assured her she was fine. Actually, for the first time, she was looking forward to some time alone.