Shadow of Shame: Book 1 of the Shadow series (14 page)

“Hmm,” he said. “I’ll try to remember.”

At Ivy’s frown he added, “Before I tell you, I need to know one thing.”

“What’s that?”

“Are you still angry with me?”

“I’m sorry that lately my behavior has given you the need to even ask that question. No, I’m no longer angry, Jonas,” she said softly. “I just need to know how our relationship will progress from here.”

Jonas scooted over to her side of the sofa; Ivy thought that was a good sign.

“I wanted to apologize for my words that day at your house. I lied. I thought at the time it was the right thing to do.”

“What exactly did you lie about?”

Jonas played with his fingers for several moments before saying,“ I
did
feel something the day we kissed. It
did
mean something to me. A great deal in fact.”

“What did you feel?” she asked.

“I felt moved, more moved than I ever have in my life, but the timing was wrong. I was still punishing myself. I had to tell you that lie to keep you from making a big mistake by being connected to me. I didn’t want you involved with me in any way. I thought I would pull you down because of my past.”

“Oh, Jonas!” she exclaimed. “How noble of you. You felt something when we kissed, yet you purposely made me think you didn’t, just to save my reputation?”

He nodded. “Just in case that wasn’t enough to deter you, I decided to tell your father everything. I thought he’d forbid you to see me, but I had a surprise coming. He told me things no one else had ever said to me before. His words stripped all my guilt away. He made me realize so many things.”

Jonas reached over and took her hand. “I’m sorry that my words hurt you, and I’m sorry that I was such an idiot.”

“No, you were perfect. You have always been perfect…for me that is.”

Jonas took her into his arms and hugged her. “You don’t suppose we could replay one of those kisses, just to be sure we both felt the same thing, do you?”

He asked that question while hugging her, breathing his voice into her ear, giving her an even worse case of the goosebumps, but she recovered quickly.

“I think that’s an excellent idea, Jonas.”

He looked into her eyes for several moments before moving toward her lips with his. As they kissed, Jonas pulled her closer. When he finally broke the kiss, he whispered, “I’ll tell you what I feel after kissing you—I feel
love
. Correction: it isn’t just your kisses—it’s you. The way you talk, the way you stuck up for Zoe, the way you do so much for her. All of those things,
plus
the kisses.” He smiled.

“I feel love too,” she said quickly, because Jonas was coming back for another kiss. She felt as though she’d gone to heaven. After their kiss, she said, “I love your kisses, but more than that, I think you are the most wonderful, kindest, and most caring man I’ve ever met. I knew I couldn’t let you slip away.”

For the next few days, Jonas walked around in a daze. Ivy loved him. She, the women he’d told himself he’d love to court if things were different, actually loved him back. It was hard to comprehend something so wonderful happening to him, and he thanked God for it.

From that point on, whenever Ivy came over for Zoe’s lessons, he left them alone, but he always told her to see him before she left. She’d usually find him in the stables where they’d kiss for a while. How he eagerly awaited that time of day. She'd awoken feelings in him that he’d never experienced before.

He couldn’t help but be disappointed when he saw his father and Caleb coming down the lane around the same time Ivy usually came out for their few private moments. He hoped they didn’t plan on staying long.

George said, “First, let me say it was a wonderful sermon Sunday. I suppose you heard about it.”

“Yes. Ivy told me. I love George Jeffries. His words have changed my life. I no longer live in the past and carry my guilt around with me.”

George smiled. “I'm so glad to hear that. I like Jeffries, too. He's the best minister Grace has ever had.”

Caleb agreed.

“So what’s the news?” Jonas said, trying to speed things along.

“One of the saloon women, Sadie, I think her name was, said Mr. E. came in last night. She sent a messenger to my house, but when I'd gotten to the saloon, he’d already left with some woman. I came this close.” George showed a small space between two of his fingers.

“Next time, maybe,” Jonas said.

“Did you say, Mr. E.?” Ivy said, coming into the office. “I’m sorry, Jonas. I saw you had guests, and was about to leave, but when I heard one of you mention the name Mr. E. I had to come in—I’ve heard that name before.”

“Where?” the three men said in unison.

Ivy held her forehead. “I’m trying to remember.”

Everyone was quiet while Ivy tried to recall where she’d heard the term Mr. E.

“I heard it at a time when I was upset…” Ivy snapped her fingers. “I remember where I heard it!” she cried. “The night Boyd attacked me. He was drunk, and he told me to call him Mr. E.”

“Egan!” Jonas exclaimed. “Of course!”

“That scum,” Caleb said. “I heard about Boyd’s attack, Ivy. I never cared much for him. It seems that all the trouble started when he became friends with Quinn and Jonas.”

“Where can we find him? No one seems to know,” Jonas said.

“I know where he is,” Ivy said.

All eyes turned to Ivy.

“Well,” she said, “I should say I know
who
knows where he lives.”

“Who?” Jonas asked.

“Quinn. He helped him move in the fall,” she said. “Peggy and I were visiting Quinn at the time, and that’s when I met Boyd. He came to get Quinn because he was helping him move.”

“I’ll go see Quinn today,” Jonas said. “If you both stop by later we’ll go to Egan’s house,” he told his father and Caleb.

“All right. We’ll stop by in a few hours.”

“Good,” Jonas said.

“May I ask why you’re looking for him?” Ivy asked.

“He’s the one who’s been blackmailing me. It wasn’t Beulah, it was Boyd.”

Ivy gasped.

His father and Caleb finally left, and as soon as Jonas heard them gallop away he grabbed Ivy. “I was so afraid I’d miss this today.”

“Me too,” she said before Jonas crushed his lips against hers. She raised her hands around his neck and moved closer to him.

Jonas ended the kiss the moment she did. “Not too close, Ivy. I’m too human. But someday soon we can get as close as two people could possibly get.” Just imagining that, Jonas moved in for another passionate kiss. He moaned when his lips touched hers.

When the kiss ended she said, “What do you mean by getting as close as two people could get?”

“I mean,” he looked into her blue eyes intently, “will you marry me?”

“I don’t think I could ever marry anyone else,” she said. She grabbed him and met his waiting lips. This time she moaned. “How soon do you suppose we could do that close thing?” she murmurred after the kiss ended. She rested her head on his chest. “I love you so much, Jonas.”

“I forgot to ask you the most important question,” he said moving away from her, and removing her arms from around his neck.

“What could be more important than asking me to marry you?”

“Will you accept Zoe as your daughter, and love her as a real mother would?” he asked.

“I do already, Jonas. I love her to bits. We'll raise her together, and if we have children of our own, I will never love Zoe less. In fact, I’ll probably show her even more love, because she'll always need it more.”

“I
do
love you, Ivy Jeffries.” Jonas kissed her, this time more passionately than ever before. His whole body tingled with want. “I hate when we have to part. That’s what made me realize we needed to marry. I want to wake up each morning to you, and end my day with you by my side. I want to fulfill my husbandly duties, and bring you the joy that God created for a husband and wife. I want so much to share that with you. Let’s marry soon.”

“I’ll talk to my parents about it today.” She traced his lips with her finger. “Father will be thrilled. I know my mother will, too. They both think so highly of you.”

Jonas smiled. “I never thought I’d ever hear anyone say that about me.”

Jonas figured Quinn would be at the livery working so he went there first. He found Quinn unhitching a horse from a buggy.

“Jonas!” Quinn said. “What’s up?”

Jonas gazed around the livery. “I thought you said you
worked
here?”

“I do!”

“You call unhitching a buggy work? I do that every day!” he laughed.

“Yes, but I get paid for doing it.” Quinn finished and led the horse to a stall.

“Did you just come here to rile me, Jonas?”

“No.” he said sobering. “I need to know where Boyd Egan lives. I found out he is our Mr. E.”

“What? You've gotta be joking!” Quinn exclaimed. “Boyd? How did you find out?”

“He told Ivy the night of the dance, when he was drunk, to call him Mr. E. You helped him move last fall. Where does he live?”

“The last house on Barn Road. It’s a large, log cabin home.”

“Thanks. My father, Caleb and I are going there today.”

“I wish I could go with you, but my father isn’t here today, so I’m in charge.”

“I’ll let you know how we make out,” Jonas said.

“I wondered where he was getting all his money!” Quinn said. “Now, I know.”

“Yep. We just need to know what he did with Beulah.”

Ivy rode her horse into town to buy more yarn. She wanted to knit a cap for Zoe to match the mittens she’d made her. She tied her horse in front of the blacksmith’s because the hitching post in front of the dry goods store was full. She gazed down the street to see that the space in front of the general store was empty. She smiled to herself. She was walking when she felt herself being shoved in the alley between two buildings. She was about to scream when she recognized Boyd Egan. What did he want with her?

“Please take your hands off me,” she shrugged his hands off her shoulders. They were standing between two buildings. It was broad daylight with people walking all around town, so she wasn’t terribly afraid. She felt more apprehensive than scared.

“What do you think you’re doing?” she asked.

“I just need to talk to you.”

Ivy simply glared at him.

“First I’d like to apologize for my horrible treatment on the night of the dance. I had too much to drink. I’m off the stuff for good now. No more saloons for me.”

“I accept your apology. Now, please move aside and let me get to the store.”

“I have news that may surprise you, since you’re pretty close with Jonas Armstrong. Did you know that Mrs. Kreider was blackmailing Jonas and suddenly she’s gone missing? People are thinking he did something to her, just like he did with his wife. Dying in childbirth? I don’t think so.

“I just want to warn you—I wouldn’t trust him. As you can see from the way he attacked me, he has a vicious temper. He’s the only one who had a motive to harm both poor Beulah, and Minnie too.”

“Jonas? He would never hurt anyone,” she said.

“He hurt me.”

“You deserved it.”

“All right,” he stepped aside to let her pass. “But don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

Ivy walked past him to the boardwalk, and then into the dry goods store. She knew that Jonas did not harm either woman. Yet…could that be part of the guilt he carried? No! She scolded herself. She wouldn’t let that horrible man put ideas into her head about Jonas, she wouldn’t. He was just trying to get even with Jonas for punching him that night.

Another thought hit her: though she didn’t believe him, other people might. Boyd had to be stopped. This would be all Jonas needed to put him back into the sorry state of mind from which he’d just recovered. She knew he couldn’t handle the town gossip and being ostracized again. Should she tell Jonas? What could she do?

Jonas, Caleb and George Armstrong knocked on the door of the house on Barn Road. Then they pounded. No one answered.

“I’m going to look in the windows,” Jonas said.

Jonas returned after a few minutes. “I don’t see anyone around. He must be out. I’d wait around, but I have to get back. I don’t like leaving my stables.”

“You didn’t get a watchdog yet?” George asked.

“I keep forgetting.”

“You have workers there,” Caleb said.

“Yes, and they left at four today.”

“It’s only half-past. I’m sure things will be fine. We’ll head over there now,” George said.

Jonas checked all his horses and equipment and everything looked untouched. He vowed to look for a dog that week.

A rider approached him as he stood outside the stables. When the man grew closer, Jonas could see it was Elmer Prinkley, the owner of the dry goods store.

“What can I do for you Elmer?”

“I’d like to buy a horse for my daughter. It'll be a Christmas gift. Is it all right if I pick one and then don’t pick it up until Christmas Eve?” Prinkley said, sliding off of his horse.

“Certainly. How old is she?” Jonas asked.

“Sixteen.”

“Experienced or novice rider?”

“Novice. She’s ridden a few times, but I’d feel better with a docile mare or a gelding.”

After Prinkley picked out the horse and paid Jonas, he headed for his horse and yelled over his shoulder. “On second thought, I’d like to pick her up the night before Christmas Eve, on the twenty-third at seven. I forgot about the play. I’m sure you’ll want to be there to see Zoe as Baby Jesus, and I wouldn’t want to miss it either. I’ll hide the horse in my barn.”

Jonas waved him off and was walking toward the house when he saw two men approaching from the road. He stopped and watched until they reached him. As they approached he saw that it was the sheriff, Frank Smith, and his deputy, a man called Phil Barkley.

Jonas and the men exchanged greetings.

“Here to pick out a horse?” Jonas asked.

“Not today. This is strictly business,” Smith said.

“What’s up?” Jonas asked.

“You reported Beulah Kreider missing a few months ago. Now, someone has told us she was blackmailing you, and that you had the perfect motive to silence her. What do you have to say about that?”

“I say I was as surprised as anyone when I went to her house, and I was shocked at what I found there. I reported her missing. And just like I told you when I reported it, the babysitter told me she was dead.

“Since then, I’ve discovered that it wasn’t Mrs. Kreider who was blackmailing me. For the past five years, I’ve paid her an agreed upon sum. In June, the price doubled. By September, the sum was four times the regular amount. That’s why I went to visit her.

“The babysitter told me a man she'd met in a saloon, who goes by the name of Mr. E., was paying her to watch the child, and Mr. E. brought food once a week.

“I've just discovered the identity of Mr. E.”

“Who is it?” both the sheriff and deputy said in unison.

“Boyd Egan.”

The sheriff and deputy exchanged looks.

“That’s strange, because he’s the one who came and told us that
you
silenced her, maybe even killed her,” Smith said. “Egan claims you’re a violent man.”

The deputy asked, “How did you find out Mr. E. was Egan?”

“The minister’s daughter,” Jonas said. “You see, she was attacked by him the night of the dance. He was drunk, and told her to call him Mr. E. I came along and rescued her, and was a bit rough with Egan. I’m sure trying to put the blame on me is his way of getting even.”

“I want to believe you, Armstrong, I really do,” the sheriff said. “You see, I’m a member of Grace, and I heard your story last Sunday. I think you’re telling the truth, but I have to question you the same as anyone else. We have to keep records on this stuff.”

“I’ll talk to Reverend Jeffries’s daughter. Which one was it?” the sheriff asked.

“Ivy,” Jonas said reluctantly.

“Tell me,” the sheriff said, “what do you think may have happened to Mrs. Kreider?”

“I have no idea. I do know that Egan built a large, new house, and he isn’t even working. Where did he get the money to build a house, I wonder? And in order for Mr. E. to hire a child-minder, and keep the child-minder in supplies, he would most likely be the one collecting those huge amounts of money I was paying.”

The sheriff nodded. “So
he’d
be the one to gain by doing something with Mrs. Kreider.”

“Right. How else could he keep raising the amount and getting the money? My father, brother, and I planned to try and find him tomorrow. We missed him today.”

“Interesting,” the sheriff said. “But don’t do anything like trying to find him. He might be pretty desperate now, and it could be dangerous. Let us handle it.”

“How did you pay the payments?” the deputy asked.

“I would put the money in an envelope, and put it into a small box on a shelf, in the shed behind the house, as I was directed to do.”

“And you started getting letters increasing the amount, when?” the sheriff asked.

“In June. I have the letters if you’d like to see them.”

“Yes, I will need those,” he said.

Jonas went into the house and came out moments later with a small bundle of papers. He handed them to the sheriff, who put them into his pocket.

“We’ll do a thorough investigation, including a complete search of the Kreider home.”

“Will you keep me informed?”

“Certainly. I’m sorry for putting you on the defensive, Armstrong, but we have to question everyone fairly.”

A noise from the stable caused them all to turn their heads toward it.

“What was that?” the sheriff asked.

Jonas walked over to the stable, stuck his head inside the door, and noticed an overturned metal bucket. He returned to the sheriff. “A bucket fell over. Do you mind if I excuse myself and check around? I can’t understand how the bucket might've tipped over on its own.”

“Yep, we'll be on our way,” the sheriff said, and they both mounted their horses and rode down the drive.

Jonas checked every inch of the stable, but found nothing that would have made the bucket turn over. He finally shrugged and went into the house.