Shattering Halos (22 page)

“Dammit, Gabriel, what’s going on?”

Then, he shook my insane world to its epicenter.

“Since Michael is in the Fourth Heaven, I need to present myself for recommendation through the three lower heavens to get to him. To accomplish this, I’m leaving you for a little while. I’m not sure how long it will take, Gaia. I’ll be away from you for the first time since you were born.”

Numbness. Then, the dread pricked at my neck.

“Angel time, right? Not human. You’re never really gone from me, you said.” Under my fingertips, the quiver of a sad chuckle stirred in his throat.

“It’s hard to explain, Gaia, but I do have to leave. All of me needs to go for this.”

The panic rose gradually, and the words poured out.

“Can’t I come with you? You wouldn’t want to leave me alone when you don’t even know when you’re coming back?”

“No living human can enter Heaven, sun.” His gentle touch as he removed a stray lock from my face didn’t appease. It tripped my nerves and left them raw.

“Don’t you dazzle me into letting you go alone. I can’t do this! Please, I need to be with you, Gabriel—the archangel will want to see me too, won’t he?”

The future lay barren ahead of me. I’d be without him again, not knowing where or how he was. A new War in Heaven might start. He could become a casualty I never learned of. I’d end up waiting for him forever!

Just thinking about it, I wanted to die—oh, yes, because I’d already experienced life without him. Adrenaline shot through me at the mental picture, and I shook my head in denial.

Gabriel had decided, I knew it. There was nothing I could do to change his mind. Hysteria snarled behind fragile shutters. I jerked to free myself from his embrace, from the scrutiny of his stare. Twisting in his arms, I squirmed to get away.

Wake me up from this nightmare!

He locked me in and spun me around. Trapping my waist, he lifted me to eye level and crushed me close.

“Gaia, sweetheart. I’ll be back soon, I promise. Let me fix this for us.”

“Quit making promises you can’t keep, Gabriel! You said you don’t know how long you’re gone for.”

I tried to hit him, but he caught my hand. He pinned me to the wall and kept me above the ground so he could control my erratic moves.

Blazing eyes reached for my gaze in an effort to soothe me. I jerked my head to the side, crinkling mine shut.

“Gaia.”

Gabriel’s voice was dangerously low, but I wasn’t listening. Not even his body shoving me once, twice, against the wall brought me to my senses. I was a confined two-year-old in the midst of a temper tantrum. A different me almost wailed in his arms.

“Gaia! You-Need-To-Listen-To-Me!”

For the first time ever, Gabriel roared at me. His power shook me to the core, and the words echoed in my ears long after they ended.

Frozen in shock, I met his stare. It drilled into me as unyielding as ice. He didn’t let go of his grip when he continued as if we’d never argued.

“Three parts are equally important for us to be able to see each other again. Am I getting through to you?” His voice was smooth and low again.

Dazed, I nodded.

“Cassiel is requesting an audience with Ramiel, the prince of the Grigori, second only to Sataniel. My brother cannot communicate his findings to any Celestial without drawing attention to himself.”

A hiccup escaped me, and I swallowed.

“Heaven will want updates on the mobilization, while Cassiel needs to give some sort of news to the Grigori in return. I’ll be in charge of obtaining the Celestial information that can keep them at bay. However, the two of us meeting up would jeopardize Ramiel’s trust in Cassiel. Are you following?”

Sniffling, I bobbed my head. He wasn’t pinning me against the wall anymore, but his arms still caged me in. His palms remained flat to the brick by my temples.

Calmer now, my skin reacted to his touch when a hand slid around to my back. The fingertips of his other hand began to trace my neckline.

He heard the tiny puff of air that escaped me and placed a light kiss on my cheek. With eyes smoothing into a familiar aquamarine, he resumed.

“You’re neither of Heaven nor Hell. You are the Earthly One in between that Cassiel and I both have access to. Every step of the way, we can appear to you with news. You can serve as the heart of our communication.”

My arms flung around his neck, sealing me tight to him.

“When do you leave? Not tonight? Please say not tonight.”

His mouth pulled softly at my lower lip, raising a tingle in me. He murmured out his answer. “Sunrise. At sunrise, Gaia.”

“Do you have plans for us?” I whispered hopefully.

“No, we can’t…”

Careful anticipation muted the sensation of abandonment in my abdomen.

One more night, please.

“Yes, we can! Fess up, Gabriel—you liked it too.”

For a second, his eyes squinted in pleasure. With lips puckered as if savoring something tasty, he purred, “Mmhmm…”

My laughter came out winded.

“Gaia. One last thing. This is his idea, but I couldn’t come up with a better plan for him to earn Ramiel’s trust after he rejected the initial invitation.” Gabriel’s eyelids wrinkled shut at his own words.

“Cassiel will have to appear as if he’s pursuing you.” His sudden growl made my lips vibrate when he took them in a different, rougher sort of kiss.

“It’s killing me, but I’ve got no other option. Since I need to be gone whenever he’s near you, I can’t even protect you from him! If he ever as much as ruffles a hair on your head…” His arms tensed around me in an unspoken pledge of revenge.

“Hush, Gabriel. I’ll be fine. Remember, I’ve fended him off before.”

I tried to kiss away his glowering expression and ignored his muttered one-word answer: “Barely.”

****

Against Gabriel’s better judgment, we returned to Shimmer’s Edge before his absence with no timeframe. We both craved complete intimacy. These hours might be all that remained for us.

The flight to the lighthouse occurred after sundown. Its friendly, flickering windows greeted us as we landed on the balcony, and a new, darker Gabriel almost shoved me in through the door.

My chest heaved with an eager trepidation he didn’t take the time to consider. No smile graced his face when he peeled my clothes off in an impossible blur, making me question whether I’d ever really worn any.

His arms twisted around me, morphing my breathing into erratic gasps. At the speed of light, he scooped me up, dismissing the pretense of gravity. When I opened my eyes, we were floating above the center of the bed.

The mist of the waterfall enveloped us as we drifted over it. My angel’s eyes stormed thick with the darkest of green, and I shivered with impatience. With every inch of my skin sensitive and accessible, Gabriel didn’t just kiss me, lick me. No, he devoured me and made me scream long before he filled my body.

I saw the hunger, his fight to be good; the struggle to ask instead of taking what he wanted. Gabriel’s eyelids crumpled shut.

“Are…you…ready,” he managed, grinding the words out one by one. He didn’t sound sweet or tender, and it wasn’t a question.

Gabriel wasn’t waiting for my assent. Instead, he unleashed himself. And held nothing back.

****

I should have noticed when he dressed me and flew me home. I should have woken up on a Tuesday morning, but my eyes opened on a Wednesday night. All I recalled was the ruthless ecstasy and how it never diminished from the minute he entered me. Gabriel hadn’t reined in his need.

My overall state of pain suggested that I’d been beaten, not made love to. Just to get out of bed and to the bathroom seemed an insurmountable obstacle. Gabriel was gone, but a letter from him stood on the night table.

Sunshine of my existence.

This time was too much. Thinking you were the only one capable of losing control was a grave mistake. I am stunned that I could not stop. When I told you that an angel should never make love to a mortal, I meant it. I love you more than you can ever comprehend, but I am left wishing I had not started this with you.

I wanted to be with you when your eyes opened, but wishes don’t always come true. Time is running out, and I am leaving in hopes of saving some remnant of a future.

Still, know that my sister will look after you while I am gone. She will be of comfort, give you harmony, show you how all is beautiful no matter the circumstances, no matter the mood. Her name is Yofiel, the Angel of Beauty. Wherever I am, in my heart I’m always with you.

Gabriel

I was sick to my stomach, sick from his absence, from the lack of food, and from the abuse of my body. I didn’t know how to cope. I called Marina, hoping she could help.

“Marina…”

My sigh of relief when she picked up alarmed her.

“Gaia! Are you okay?”

“Mm, not really.”

“What’s going on? Tell me!”

“Are you done with classes for the day? I need some food, I think.” My brain pounded against my skull.

“What? Are you sick?”

“God, maybe I am. I feel like I’ve been beaten with a sledgehammer.”

“Well, have you? Is he treating you all right, Gaia? Be honest with me.”

My laughter sounded exhausted even to me.

“No, I mean, yes. Just tired. I might have OD’d on him a little bit. And I haven’t eaten in a while…”

“Wow, you’re freaking out of your mind! Am I getting you right, here? You’ve been on a Gabriel-bender, and now you’re hung over? Dude’s so not looking after you. What kind of a guardian angel
is
he?”

While Marina sputtered and seethed, I laughed that stupid, dog-tired laughter again.

“Sorry, I know. Instead of protecting me, he’s humoring me.” My sigh morphed into a groan.

“Geez, lady, I’m on my way. In-N-Out Burger? Animal Style? Fries and Coke?”

“Please—you’re a lifesaver.”

Chapter 22 — Timanfaya

Cassiel

Look at me go. Endangering my entire existence as a Fallen by agreeing to this bullshit. Pissed at Gabriel and annoyed as hell at myself, I wished I’d eradicated her when I had the chance. Instead, I stood at the top of the Timanfaya with at least thirty of Ramiel’s minions surrounding me.

Damn Grigori. The reason why they needed Free Fallen Ones to do their dirty work was their incapability of going incognito. Because nature reacted to the purity of their evil, they couldn’t dim that pitch-black magnificence of theirs.

Now I got to watch the lava sputter in small geysers from the ground as if the volcano hadn’t been dead for centuries. No need to be an angel to sense evil
that
concentrated.

I snorted as I imagined the utter terror even one of them could inflict on Earthlings just by materializing.

Of course, the grandeur of Ramiel’s appearance couldn’t be underestimated. The Timanfaya shook in fury and ruptured to make room for him in an explosive ejection of magma. With wings of the thickest black, he expanded from murky dust into an oversized titan. He loomed over his henchmen and me. Groaning to myself, I lifted a hand in greeting.

“Ramiel. What’s up?”

The guy never had been much for greetings, so he summoned me with the imperious crooking of a claw.

“Why are you here, Cassiel?” He thundered.

“Well, I gave your offer another thought and realized you got the wrong answer.”

“Really now? Do tell.”

“We’ve done each other favors before, Ramiel—always a blast, of course—and now I need some help.”

“With what?” Simmering eyes narrowed at me. Wonderful.

“With a couple of things. The archangels. They need to stay the hell away from my freedom, and—”

“Why wouldn’t they, Cassiel? What have you done that’s so remarkable?”

“—which ties in to my other problem. You’re familiar with what Gabriel’s been up to. He’s ruined all the fun for me lately with his lame-ass indiscretions, and I’m ready for revenge.”

Ramiel let out a roaring sigh, already tired of my dramatics, and I laughed inside.

“You want revenge for not having fun, Cassiel?”

“Damn straight! His female turning me down is about the least fun I’ve ever had.”

His features crumpled into a frown as he stared me down. I had to do better. “Why do you think Earth is paradise for us Free Fallen Ones, Ramiel? Chicks, man! Sex!” I said.

Ramiel supported his chin in a palm. A low snarl rumbled in his throat. Yeah, not good enough.

“Okay, so this one’s a hottie. I’m not big on rejection, and I need to have her whenever and however I want. Gabriel’s in the way of a good time. Once she’s mine, I can’t be bothered with his petty reprisals. You get my drift?” I was definitely convincing myself.

“No, I don’t. Take the other females. Why her?”

“Really? You don’t get it? Dude, she said ‘no!’
Nobody
says ‘no’ to me. It’s so damn hot I’m going crazy here; I want her. Over and over.” I did want her. I should become a motivational speaker.

“Never mind.” Ramiel was groaning with impatience. “So you need my protection from the archangels. How can
you
serve
me
?”

“Well, here’s a treat for you. The Celestials are aware of what’s going on with Gabriel and his female. They’re planning an intervention, and if I look neutral, I can be…your infiltrator!”

My tap dance and jazz hands must not have impressed him, because he sneered in disdain.

“No, really, Cassiel. That’s the kicker? How can you, a Fallen One, be our spy? The Heavens don’t trust you.”

“Correct, but Gabriel shares everything with the female. Since I’ll need to dazzle her to make her surrender to me, extracting information will be a piece of cake.”

Ramiel lifted his bushy eyebrows and crouched down to my level. “And you’re keeping him in the dark.”

“Of course. I’ll pop up a Free Fallen energy field to block him out. Then, I’ll do a little memory-swiping before I take off.”

“No. No energy field.” He was growling. Lovely.

“Oh, sure, and how else am I supposed to learn what Gabriel tells her without the Heavens eavesdropping? Even if Gabriel were fine sharing, they’d realize I was spying.”

“Block out the
Celestials
.”