Shelter in Seattle (12 page)

“I’d think you two would have stopped staring into each other’s eyes by now.” Maggie stood behind them.

Julianne sighed unhappily when Caleb pulled his gaze from her and smiled at the older woman.

“Now, Maggie. She’s my wife, and I can stare at her all day, if I’ve a mind to.” He turned to the wagon and reached for his Bible and Jonathan’s bag.

“Well, I guess you can at that.” Maggie hugged Julianne. “That blue sure makes the color in your eyes pop out.”

“Thank you, Maggie.” Julianne fussed with Jonathan’s blankets as she followed the older woman into the church.

She couldn’t stop the grin no matter how hard she tried. A vision of her eyes popping out and rolling around in the dirt caused her to chuckle out loud.

The laugh caught in her throat when Caleb dropped his arm from around her shoulder and greeted the Pastor. “Good Morning, Reverend. What do you have in store for us today?”

“I’ll be teaching on the Garden of Eden and how one lie caused the fall of mankind, and how the sin of omission is still a lie.” The preacher shook Caleb’s hand.

“Sounds like a good sermon. We better hurry and get a seat.” Caleb placed his hand in the center of Julianne’s back and gently helped her into the church.

She was thankful for his support. She wasn’t sure her feet would have moved forward if not for him.

Lying.

Why lying?

Did he know of her sin? Was it possible?

Did everyone know she had lied to her husband? Was still lying to him?

The service started with songs and prayer. Julianne tried to fill her mind with the joy of singing. But then the preacher entered the pulpit and told everyone that had a Bible to turn to Genesis three verse four. Her palms turned sweaty, and her heartbeat quickened.

He read the scripture aloud for those who didn’t have Bibles. “And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die:”

Julianne stared down at Jonathan. The top of her head felt on fire. Was the preacher looking at her? Was everyone looking at her?

The preacher continued. “Because of that one lie, Eve disobeyed God. She and her mate, Adam fell from God’s grace.”

His voice continued on. Julianne tried to think of something else. She knew she was lying to her husband. She didn’t need to be reminded of it by a preacher. Sorrow deep and painful tore at her heart.

Jonathan began to fuss. Julianne took that moment to escape. She grabbed his bag and eased past Caleb’s legs, stumbling a bit in her haste to exit the church. She walked outside on leaden feet to the big oak tree.

Tears streamed down her face.

When had she started crying? Had anyone seen the tears?

She glanced over her shoulder back to the church. No one followed her, so she sank down at the base of the large pine tree.

Julianne changed Jonathan’s diaper and began to talk to God. Her hands did the work while her heart did the talking.

“
Lord, I didn’t think this lie would hurt Caleb. I never wanted to do that. Father, please forgive me. Forgive me of all my sins and come live in my heart so that I won’t do it again.”
A peace like no other filled her. She savored the feeling of being wrapped in warm loving arms. “
Caleb said you love me so much you sent your son to die for me. I believe him, and I realize now that the only way he will ever believe me is if I stop lying to him. I’ll tell Caleb everything. I don’t know how, but I will. I promise.”

 She wiped the tears from her face and gathered the baby close. Julianne looked up into the sky that peeked through the many trees.

“I’ll tell Caleb after lunch. Lord, please let him forgive me, too.”

The sound of male voices singing, Bringing in the Sheaves carried out the church doors. Julianne slipped back inside. Everyone was standing, so she took her place beside Caleb.

He leaned over and whispered. “Is the baby okay?”

Julianne tucked her hand into his. “He’s fine. Everything is fine.” She rocked Jonathan in time with the beat of the song.

For the first time in her life, she felt free. The song ended and Julianne handed Jonathan to Caleb. She quickly gathered their things and joined the loggers and the few families as they made their way out of the small church.

She hurried to help the other women set the food on the tables for the picnic. Julianne wanted to tell Caleb of her new commitment to God and to confess her lie to him so they could go back to being comfortable with each other. He hadn’t said anything, but Julianne sensed he knew she was hiding something from him.

“You’re awful chipper.” Maggie commented, setting a large potato salad on the table.

Julianne felt the older woman studying her face. She tried to hide her newfound joy from her friend. Caleb should be the first one to be told.

“You’ve changed. There’s a sparkle in your eyes that weren’t there this morning.” Maggie moved in front of her.

Julianne was forced to look the older woman in the eye. She opened her mouth to deny the truth of Maggie’s words and then stopped. Her lying days were over.

“I really want to tell Caleb first, Maggie.” She whispered, leaning toward her friend.

Maggie clapped her hands with joy drawing attention to them. “You’re with a wee one, aren’t you?” She grabbed Julianne and hugged her to her breast.

Over Maggie’s shoulder Julianne watched as Caleb’s face turned as white as new fallen snow.

One of the men from the sawmill burst into the churchyard, yelling, “We need every man on the west side. A fire is blazin’ and it’s headed this way!”

His shout drew everyone’s attention from Julianne, except Caleb’s.

 Maggie ran to where Caleb and the men stood. “I’ll come and help.”

Caleb handed Jonathan to her. “No, Maggie we need you here to send food and water up to us. Would you see my family gets home okay?”

“You know I will.”

Chapter 14

Julianne watched Caleb leave with the men. What must he be thinking? She had to explain it to him. She felt momentary panic as her thoughts jumped ahead. Surely, he didn’t really think she was with child. Silently she prayed. Implored was more like it.
Lord, what a mess this is. Please, please, dear Lord, comfort my husband and keep him safe as he fights the fire.

Maggie carried Jonathan back to Julianne. “I’m sorry. I wish it had been a better time to tell Caleb about the babe.”

“I’m not having a baby, Maggie.” Julianne took Jonathan.

“You’re not?” Concern filled her voice. “But Caleb… he heard me… I’m pretty sure Caleb thinks you are. Maybe you are and just don’t know it yet.” Maggie offered as she began filling a plate with food. “But since you don’t know fer sure, it will be a simple thing to straighten up when he gets home. Who knows, maybe he’ll think about it and decide he likes the idea.”

Julianne felt tears prick the back of her eyelids. She refused to cry. Maggie had no way of knowing their marriage wasn’t real or of the anguish she had just caused Caleb.

She followed Maggie to one of the many trees that surrounded the churchyard. Maggie spread out an old blanket, and the two women sank down on it to eat lunch.

Jonathan fell asleep to Julianne’s gentle rocking. She laid him down on the blanket beside her and looked about.

The two women that arrived on the boat with her sat together talking in soft whispers. Julianne couldn’t hear what they were saying but was pretty sure they were voicing their concern for their husbands. The older woman sat by herself, she held a new baby to her breast and sang Amazing Grace in a quiet soothing way.

“Well, if you weren’t happy cause you’re with child, what put that new sparkle in your eyes?” Maggie took a bite of fried chicken.

Julianne thought of the moments she’d spent in the presence of the Lord. She really wanted to tell someone and since Caleb wasn’t there...why not tell Maggie?

“Maggie, I opened my heart to Jesus this morning.” The words came out a whisper.

“Well, Glory Be! It’s about time.” Maggie set her plate to the side and hugged Julianne.

Surrounded in the happiness of her friend, Julianne poured her heart out. “All these months I’ve been afraid my uncle would come and snatch me away. Maggie it was as if God took that fear away.” She hesitated, “Don’t get me wrong. I’m still scared he’ll come, but now I know God will protect me.”

Maggie took both Julianne’s hands and searched her face. “This uncle, he’s the reason you been doing laundry and making money? If he came, were you going to leave Caleb and that baby behind and just keep running?”

 “Oh no, I’d never even thought of that. I wanted to repay Caleb. He’s been talking about starting an apple orchard, but we don’t have enough money to buy the seedlings right now. I’m going to give him the money.” Julianne stared at her friend. She saw the doubt in Maggie’s eyes.

“You still think I took Sloan’s money don’t you?”

Maggie dropped Julianne’s hands and picked her plate back up. “It don’t matter none.”

Julianne’s heart constricted. It felt as if Maggie had taken a knife and twisted it. It did matter. If Maggie still doubted her, did Caleb? She wasn’t sure.

“I’m going home.” Julianne stood. She picked up Jonathan and her plate of untouched food.

Maggie jumped to her feet. “I’m going with you. I promised that man of yours I would keep an eye on you while he was gone.”

Julianne felt hurt turn to anger as it welled up and spilled over. She turned to the older woman. “I don’t need a babysitter, Maggie. Jonathan and I are going home alone.”

She didn’t give Maggie time to respond. Julianne put Jonathan’s things into their wagon and laid the baby down on the floor then climbed up. The blue sheet slipped easily over her head. Julianne picked up the baby and gently laid him in the folds. Then, she took the reins in her hands and turned the animals toward home.

Tears filled her eyes. How was it, that everyone still thought she was a thief? Even after all these weeks, they still condemned her for a crime she hadn’t committed. Julianne thought they’d grown to know and love her. Now she realized it was all just an illusion.

Julianne heard a horse following her. She was sure it was Maggie. Maggie was a woman of her word. It gave her some comfort to know her friend cared some for her, even if she didn’t trust her.

****

 The next morning Julianne rose with a headache. She wasn’t sure if the headache was from worrying about Caleb fighting the fire, or if it was from the tears she’d cried all evening. “Probably, both.” She told Jonathan, taking him from the crib.

“You and I are going to the river today. I’m going to do this last basket of laundry, and then I’m telling Maggie I’m out of the clothes washing business.” She continued to talk to the baby as she got things ready.

“Things are going to change around here. I’ve had a lot of time to think about things, and I’ve decided to tell Caleb everything.”

Jonathan cooed up at her as she gently slipped him into her sling. “I know what you’re thinking. But I have to tell him that my uncle must have taken Sloan’s money. I couldn’t tell him before, and I really didn’t think it would matter. Now, I need him to know the truth and to trust me. If we are to be a real family, there should be nothing between us.” She lifted the basket and closed the cabin door.

Heading down to the river, she continued with her conversation. “I also told God I would tell Caleb about our little jaunts down here.” The baby smiled up at her.

“Oh, you like the sound of that do you?” She entered the clearing and looked up into the clear blue sky. “I just hope he doesn’t get too upset with me.”

Julianne set down the laundry and hugged the baby to her for several long moments. Thoughts of Caleb fighting the fire troubled her. She decided to pray for him.

But how did one pray? Really pray?

She thought back to the many nights that Caleb had prayed for them both before going to bed each evening. His prayers had sounded like he was talking to someone right there in the room with them. Julianne took a deep breath and began.

“Lord, please watch over Caleb and protect him while he fights the fire.” Julianne opened her eyes and stared down at Jonathan. His sleepy eyes reassured her.

Feeling as if someone were watching her, Julianne looked over her shoulder. The bush behind her moved ever so slightly.

Julianne saw Morning Star’s doe skin dress. She smiled and opened her mouth to greet her friend.

The Indian woman shook her head
no
and raised a finger to her lips. Her dark eyes darted toward the tree line and she repeated her earlier actions.

What was wrong with her? Morning Star had always come out of hiding before. The two women had spent several hours sitting on the bank with their feet in the river and playing with the baby.

Julianne looked about her and listened. For the first time, she noticed the silence. The birds weren’t singing. When she looked back to where her friend had stood, no one was there.