Shymers (21 page)

Again I hear Harrison’s voice in my head
.
Attitude is everything
.
I try to ignore the ache in my chest when thinking of him.

“I tried to turn you in,” Zeke says quietly. “How could you say I don’t deserve this?”

Tilting my head, I smile. “You were only trying to win your father’s approval. One thing I’ve learned from my short time here in Society is that love isn’t given out very generously to Shymers. It’s not fair, and it’s not right. Everyone deserves the chance to be loved, Zeke. And who knows? Maybe you will find someone in the Free Lands who wants to be with you. Maybe you would even learn what it’s like to kiss someone before you die.”

Even though the night is falling on us with greater speed, his eyes manage to sparkle in the fair light and the corners of his mouth pull into a mischievous grin. “Is that o
n
you
r
playlist? Wanting to kiss someone?”

My face flushes. “Yes, but with someone I love.”

Something shifts in his eyes and his grin fades away. “You lov
e
Harriso
n
! I knew it! That would explain all the time the two of you have been spending together, and why you would want to run away with him.”

Fighting to hold back the tears that well up, I nod. “I was following his cousin when you stopped me. We were supposed to meet up with him.”

Zeke grabs my arms in a ball of urgency and excitement. “So what’s stopping you? You should run to him, before it’s too late!”

“My mother—”

Zeke cuts me off. “Your mother may already be dead, Olive. I’m sure she would understand if you chose a life of freedom with someone you love. She would probably rather have you happy than know you risked it all for one last chance to say goodbye.”

His expression of determination and desperation has me reeling. Minutes ago, I thought he was going to have me locked away forever.

“Why did you change your mind in the elevator?”

A slow, sly grin returns to his lips. “Even though I was trying to turn you in, you were still trying to help me. You and Harrison are the only two people who have ever been that nice to me.”

“I still don’t understand. Why did you try to stop me in the first place? Why would you want to see me thrown into suspension for trying to run away with Harrison?”

Zeke sighs and looks away. “Harrison has the really good looks. People like him. He once had a great family who really cared about him. Then you came along, looking more like a Future, even though you were born that way, just like him. When I found out Harrison was running away …I was even more jealous of him than ever before.”

“You alread
y
kne
w
he was running away?”

“Not until last night. I saw him bringing the pack up from the basement. I’m the one who told Director Mahr,” he says, turning back to me.

His head hangs low and his eyes plead forgiveness as he waits for me to say something. He won’t say he’s sorry for doing such a terrible thing and his actions are enough of an apology. I am sad for him, just as I am for all the Shymers. I have to resist the urge to hug him when a small part of me would rather knock him out for trying to turn me in.

“I don’t understand, Zeke. How could you do that to Harrison? I thought you said he was you
r
frien
d
?”

“He is. It’s like I said—I was insanely jealous. But once I realized what I had done by reporting him, I helped him run away. I couldn’t have him face suspension because of something I had done. I figured I could stop you, instead. It seemed easier, since I didn’t know you. You were just another thing Harrison had that I would never understand. I’m really sorry, Olive. I won’t blame you if you hate me.”

Suddenly, I am hit with a wall of selfishness. I was willing to sacrifice the freedom of three others just for the chance to spend a few moments with my mother, when I may be the only one to know unconditional love. My mother would want me to do what was best for everyone involved. She had always done everything she could to protect me and keep me safe. Now it’s my turn to protect my friends.

“I think you’re right,” I say, my voice cracking with sadness. “I shouldn’t risk everything for just one moment with my mother.”

Zeke smiles down on me. It’s a warm, kind smile that’s more like a pat on the back. “Your mother hid you away from Society nearly your whole life. She obviously wanted you to be happy and not have to be a part of this life. What do you think she would say if you were to be locked away like she is?”

When I look back on the dark fortress, my heart sinks deeper into my chest and my eyes fill with tears. Is my mother sitting all alone up there in some small room? Will she ever be happy again? Will she be locked away forever, until she dies of old age? It’s possible they’ve already put her to death. I shudder.

“Goodbye, Mother,” I whisper to the building, wishing she could somehow hear me.

14 – You’re a Bit Squeaky for a Shymer

Peculiar noises come with the darkness. Although we must be miles from government headquarters considering we have been walking forever, the faint barking of the dogs can still be heard in the distance. It reminds me of the wolves we heard when living in the Free Lands. They weren’t any less frightening, either, as they usually warned of danger.

Above everything else is music floating through the air. The melody and instruments are nothing like the songs that my parents used to sing to me. The guitars sound angry and a man screams words along with it, his voice raspy and strained. I try to envision what kind of person would listen to such odd music, and hope we won’t be running into them any time soon.

Zeke offers me his hand and I take it, hoping it doesn’t mean anything more to him than what it really is—comfort from the fear that is overwhelming me. We keep a slow pace through the neighborhoods of the smaller homes so as to not draw unwanted attention. More people have gathered outside with the coolness the night brings, but they don’t pay us any attention. Farther away from the headquarters, we begin to see groups of people gathered in the yards behind the homes, smoking cigarettes.

A stabbing guilt seizes me when I am reminded of Kai. I could have looked for her while visiting my mother. Maybe I could have found some way to even free her. By now she may be dead, having never known what it felt like to be loved unconditionally.

A familiar gleam of metal shines under the street lights ahead, making my heart quicken. I have seen the wall so many times over the years with Taylor, only from the other side. We are almost to the Free Lands.

Leaning into Zeke, I whisper, “We’re almost there.”

We both turn at the sight of a small red flame flickering off to our right. Although I am used to seeing fires and even know how to start one, I have not seen any since entering Society. A circle of people who look to be our age are gathered around the flames that lick the darkness. Uptown is so far away that it’s possible we have stumbled upon another Shymer community. From a distance, it’s impossible to clearly identify exactl
y
wha
t
they are.

“What do you think they’re doing?” Zeke whispers.

“I don’t know,” I whisper back.

They don’t seem to be cooking any food over the flames. What else could they possibly be doing with a fire? “Just keep walking.”

We quicken our steps until a male voice calls out, “What do we have here?”

Zeke and I both slowly turn to the voice. A figure comes sauntering forward in the darkness. Zeke squeezes my hand.

“Should we run?” I ask in a low whisper.

“No. There are too many of them.”

He’s right. Although the others remain close to the fire, they aren’t very far away. There could easily be a dozen people watching, their heads raised in interest. If we run now, it may just turn into a fun game for them.

The man stops in front of us. He is very large, with a thick body and dark hair, dressed in a dark T-shirt with denim pants. Tattoos—not like my mark but more like the free spirited drawings my mother has on her back—spiral around his muscular arms and lead up to his neck. His eyes blend in with the darkness, their color indistinguishable and taking me in with too much interest.

“What do we have here?” he asks. He smiles, revealing dark gaps between his teeth. “What are you two doing this far out?”

I bite down on my lip, deciding it will be best for Zeke to do most of the talking. He has spent his whole life in Society and I still don’t always know what is considered “normal.”

“Just…ahh…going for a walk,” Zeke answers.

I cringe. Zeke doesn’t sound the slightest bit sure of himself.

“You wouldn’t be thinking of jumping the border now, would you?” The man laughs in a tight, wheezing noise that reminds me of Kai.

Zeke looks back at him, expressionless.

I decide it is time to help him out. “Why do you care? Are you going to report us? What are you, anyway?” I try to make my voice sound tough, even though my small frame is of no threat to the much bigger man.

He raises his chin and looks down on me. “That all depends on wha
t
yo
u
are. You two Shymers?”

“Yes,” Zeke says loudly. “Yes, we’re both Shymers.”

I nod, deciding this man has to be one as well. He has none of the artificial features of the Futures at school, although my friends explained it is something fairly new and no
t
al
l
Futures elect to have the surgeries to alter their looks.

“Aren’t you a little too pretty to be a Shymer?” the man asks. His eyes bore into me.

“It’s just because we’re standing in the dark,” I answer.

The man guffaws. “What would a couple of Shymers be doing out here this late at night? Were the two of you hoping to sneak off and mess around a little bit?” His words, dirty and invasive, go along well with his smile that has morphed into a sneer. I push into Zeke’s side, fearful of what this man is planning.

Zeke lightly squeezes my hand again. “You’re not a Shymer?” he asks the man.

The man laughs, making the strange wheezing noise again. “Do I look like I’m still a kid?”

On second glance, I realize my first assessment of this crowd being teenagers like us was way off. His face does seem much older than that of an eighteen-year-old. The lines underneath his eyes are deep and hard. His voice is much lower than any of the boys from school. So what are these people? Little red lights dance around his friends behind him. Are they smoking cigarettes? What if they’r
e
Rebel
s
? This man may just be afraid we will report them. My heart races with the possibility of what these people are.

“We didn’t mean to cause any problems,” I tell him. “We’ll leave and get out of your hair now.” I push on Zeke’s chest, encouraging him to turn away.

“Get out of m
y
wha
t
?” the man asks with a deep frown. “What kind of talk is that?”

I flinch, realizing I had used an old world saying.

The man’s fingers curl around my arm. “Who are you?”

“Let her go,” Zeke warns.

The man glares at him. “What you going to do about it, Shymer? You look like you’re close to your manhood. You probably wouldn’t mind if I shortened your DOD up a bit, would you?”

Reaching into his pocket, he produces something small that gleams in the moonlight. It’s a knife. Harrison once told me violence is another frowned on activity in Society and weapons are only owned by soldiers. Either this man is an off-duty soldier or h
e
i
s
one of th
e
Rebel
s
. As much as Society tries to pretend Rebels don’t exist, the
y
d
o
. Taking into consideration the cigarettes, tattoos and everything else, these people have to be part of the Rebel movement.

“Please,” I beg twisting away from his hold. “Please, just let us go. You were right—we just came out here to mess around a little. It’s one of the last things on both of our playlists.”

The man brings the knife up to his mouth. Just when I fear he is about to cut himself, he uses the tip of the blade to pick on something between two of his remaining teeth. He folds the knife back up. As his hand lowers to his pocket, I catch the glimpse of a laser tattoo against his wrist, glowing in the night much like I imagine our Shymer marks would if they were visible now.

It reads
:
ka
i
.

“You know Kai? Kai Grohl?” I ask suddenly. I’m taking a chance that it’s the same Kai, but it may be our only hope of escaping with our lives intact.

The man freezes in place, the knife not quite to his pocket. His eyes flash onto mine. “How do you know Kai?”

I let out a large breath of air I wasn’t even aware I had been holding on to. “We go to school together. Or at least w
e
di
d
.”