Silverlighters (5 page)

“It’s fine. I’ve got it,” I said, my voice hard as I wrapped my arms around it.
 

I shoved my head in the locker, hoping Jenifer would take the hint, when I heard a voice behind me.

“There you are. I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”

I straightened up, banging my head on the locker.

It was the girl that had caught my eye.

I smiled sheepishly, rubbing my head, and feeling like a complete idiot. But in my defense, my nerves were already frazzled before I had the good fortune to run into Jenifer.

“Oh – do you know Ellie?” Jenifer asked. “I was just going over her time–”

“Do I know Ellie?” the girl slung an arm around my shoulder. “We go way back, isn’t that right, Ellie?”

“
Er
– yeah,” I brightened, smiling at my savior. I tried not to notice the way Jenifer’s face fell. “We – that is–”

“Beck,” the girl whispered.

“Beck and I go way back.”

“Come on, then,” Beck grinned, guiding me away from the locker, deftly pushing it closed. “You don’t want to be late. See you, Jen.”

“Yeah – see you, Jen – thanks for showing me to my locker,” I said. I couldn’t help but feel a little guilty.

“It’s Jenifer,” Jenifer snapped, her face hardening. “No one calls me Jen.”

I no longer felt sorry for her.

“Yeah, Ellie. Get it right. It’s Jenifer,” Beck snickered.

I bit my lip so hard I tasted blood.

6

I hate that moment when you walk into a room for the first time and find yourself an object of scrutiny. When all eyes turn your way, some with welcoming smiles. Others looking you up and down. Checking you out. The girls are far worse than the boys. I never know where to look. If I should smile, say hello. Run.

By third period it wasn’t so bad. By then most people had already seen me around the school, or in one of their classes. I even said hello to a few familiar faces as I walked in.

Until I saw
them.
Every single one of them was in that class. In fact, they ended up being in all of my science classes.

But this time, none of them were paying me the slightest bit of attention. If anything, they seemed to be making a point of
not
noticing me.

They really did stand out. Everything they did, even something as simple as the order they sat in – tallest in the middle, then going down on each side – seemed as though it had been choreographed.

Morgan sat in the middle, his rich, dark skin and short hair complimenting the flawless complexions of Jonathon and Lanita, a girl with dark hair, who sat on either side of him. Madison and Andrew – a blond with piercing blue eyes – sat on the outside edges.

They faced the front of the room, their expressions flat and bored. As though they were trying not to draw attention to themselves – at least that was the feeling I got – it was what I did.

To look down was to show weakness. To look at someone directly attracted attention.

It was eerie. As though they were posing for a photo shoot. Even their clothing complimented each other.

The
chem
teacher, Mr. Jones, barely even glanced up when I stopped in front of his desk.

He pointed to a table at the front where a dark-haired boy with an unfortunate complexion was frantically scribbling down notes even though the lesson hadn’t started yet. “You can sit next to Donald,” he grunted.

Jenifer scowled at her father, but Mr. Jones had already turned away, a shiny bald patch showing through the back of his thick, dark hair.

Jenifer’s scowl turned to me.

I shrugged. It wasn’t like I had a choice. It was the only empty seat in the room.

Donald, who looked remarkably like Jenifer – with the same black-framed glasses and shiny black hair – looked up as I approached.

His face turned beet red. He cleared his throat loudly, and opened his mouth.

A soft, ringing laugh from behind us made him snap his mouth shut and return to his notes.

I was pretty sure it was Madison.

Donald was clutching his pen so tightly his knuckles had turned white.

I felt bad for him. I knew what it was like to be him – I had spent most of my life keeping a low profile, but that also made me the target of people like Madison.

Bianca had been my first real friend – and only because she was so stubborn. She decided she wanted to be my friend, and that was that. At first it had been easier to ignore her than avoid her. I didn’t want to make friends. It only made it harder when I had to leave.

I had never completed an entire year at the same school.

But somewhere along the way something changed, and Bianca became my person.

And it was kind of hard to ignore her after she came to my rescue when the super-bitches – Andrea and Kelly – decided it was time to show me some love with their fists when the boy Andrea liked dared pay me a little too much attention.

Not that I needed her to – I could have easily taken them both. But that would have meant drawing attention to myself.

The fact that Bianca – who was thin and short and scrawny – stepped in to help me, changed everything.

It was hard pretending to be someone you’re not. But it was harder doing it alone. Bianca didn’t care about my past – she was too busy living in the here and now. She changed my perspective on life.

I’d been torn between the past that haunted me and the uncertain future that lay ahead.

Bianca taught me how to live in the present.

I sat down next to Donald, and turned slightly toward him. “Hi,” I said softly.

Donald continued his furious note-taking as though he hadn’t heard me, but his mouth curved into a smile.

It had taken all of my willpower not to look directly at them as I came in. My eyes just seemed to keep wanting to go in their direction. Especially one in particular.

It wasn’t until Mr. Jones started talking that I let my guard down, and felt my shoulders relax.

I turned, making a show of taking my things out of my bag as I discreetly peeked through the curtain of my hair.

I had time to notice that Jonathon was no longer wearing his jacket, and that despite being slim, his black t-shirt did nothing to hide the simple fact he was well built, then he looked up.

My heart skipped a beat.

There was no denying it. Something about him unnerved me, but it also intrigued me.

For a moment, there was an almost wolfish look in his eyes as they met mine, and I felt my breath catch.

I have no idea why certain people make me think of animals. It’s always been a peculiar quirk of mine.

Madison was harder to define. Sometimes, she was like a swan, devastatingly beautiful and graceful. But when she noticed that Jonathon was watching me, there was something almost hawk-like and predatory about her.

It made me wonder if they had a history together.

I looked away, still unnerved by my first encounter with them.

Jenifer, don’t-call-me-Jen, spent the next few minutes glaring at me as though I had arranged to sit next to ‘her’ Donald just to spite her.

Then, when she realized Donald wasn’t paying me the slightest bit of attention, she quickly changed tactics.

The girl was completely hot and cold.

When Mr. Jones told everyone to grab a text book, Jenifer leapt out of her chair as though it was the very opportunity she’d been waiting for.

“Hi Ellie,” she smiled, glancing slyly at Donald. “Just thought I’d see how you were settling in.”

“Fine,” I said.

I didn’t want to encourage her.

She wasn’t at all bothered.

“Hi Donald,” Jenifer said brightly.

Donald looked up, his face flushing again. “Hi Jenifer.”

Jenifer beamed at him, but he had already returned to his notes.

Donald was just as clueless as Jenifer.

Jenifer cleared her throat. “Have you started on your Extra Credit yet, Donald? I have. I’ve decided to do an oral presentation on the interaction between radiation and matter.”

Donald looked up, interest flickering across his face. “What area are you focusing on?”

“Actually,” Jenifer said pompously, her loud, squeaky voice making everyone turn our way, “considering how many teenagers have no idea how much damage they’re doing to themselves, I’ve decided to focus on the photochemical interaction of ultraviolet induced
erythema
of the epidermis, but I specifically want to focus on the effects of non-ionizing radiation not absorbed by
chromophones
and how it affects the extracellular matrix.”

By the time she finished most of the class was staring at her with contempt. Nobody likes a show off – though Daddy Jones had watched with great pride as she prattled on.

“What – so basically you’re giving a convoluted report on sunburn?” I spluttered. To my mortification, everyone laughed – except
them
– and Mr. Jones turned to me, his eyes brightening.

So did Donald.

Jenifer slunk back to her seat, and spent the rest of the lesson glaring at me as her father grilled me to test my knowledge.

I couldn’t get out of the room fast enough when the bell went, wishing I’d stopped to think about the interaction between the brain and the mouth and the negative side effects of not thinking before speaking.

My eyes glued firmly to the ground, I headed for the lockers even though I already had everything I needed – for the next lesson at least. What I really needed was a moment to collect myself.

When I reached my locker, I just stared into it, as though it held the answers.

“So – how do you like Berrywood?”

I glanced up, and all the breath gushed out of me.

It was him.

“
Er
… I – uh – it’s fine. I mean, it’s still my first day,” I said, mentally kicking myself for coming across like such an idiot.

He smiled, like he was used to girls fumbling their words.

For some reason this irritated me.

I took a deep breath, and decided to start again. “I’m Ellie.”

“Yeah – I know. We’re in the same
chem
class.”

“And you are?” I raised a brow.

Our eyes locked. I literally couldn’t look away this time.

“I’m Jonathon,” he said, and even though I saw him smile in my periphery vision, it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

He leaned against the locker. “It’s nice to meet you ... Ellie.”

I tried to look away, disconcerted by the pull he had on me. And I wasn’t at all impressed by his cocky attitude.

I also had no idea how to respond to a statement like that. Or if I even wanted to.

But there was no denying I was attracted to him. It was a horrid, intense attraction that I had no idea what to do with.

It also surprised me. I always thought there was something wrong with me. Bianca had liked a new boy every other week. Me – I usually felt nothing. I could look at a boy and know that he was good-looking, but it didn’t stir the feelings in me that it did for Bianca or other girls my age.

Bianca said I was just a late bloomer. That one day it would stare me in the face and I would know what she meant.

Jonathon’s gaze was so intent that my mind went completely blank.

It wasn’t until he glanced up, looking somewhere behind me, that I managed to pull my eyes away.

“I’ll see you later,” he said, his eyes hardening.

I watched as he walked away, confused by his abrupt departure.

His undeniably cute butt swayed slightly from side to side, as though waving a cheeky goodbye. Like he’d just won some game I wasn’t even aware of playing.

And then I saw Madison watching me. Her eyes narrowed as she slipped her arm through Jonathon’s.

She swung her thick, blonde hair as she turned her back on me, and the two of them walked away.

I got her message loud and clear.

I slammed my locker door, telling myself I didn’t care. Not in the slightest.

But I was lying to myself.

I had no idea why Jonathon affected me that way. Not then, anyway.

Or why the feelings stirring inside me were so much stronger when I was near him.

All I could think was why now? And why a boy who was so obviously taken?