Read Single Wide Female: The Bucket List Mega Bundle - 24 Books (Books #1-24) Online
Authors: Lillianna Blake
“I’m sorry, Liam.” I snatched up the blanket I had tripped over and wrapped it around me.
“I think maybe you need to consider a career in contact sports.” Liam’s face showed no sign of amusement.
I nodded a little and made my way down the long corridor toward the dressing room. Cheryl was waiting for me inside. She looked at me wrapped up in the blanket.
“Is that supposed to be some kind of fashion statement?” she asked.
“It’s better than what I’m hiding underneath.” I shook my head as I revealed the ripped nightgown.
“Oh, no! How did that happen?” She hurried over to get my clothes for me.
I took them into the dressing room. As I was changing I recounted the experience that I’d just had with Liam.
“Well, don’t be so glum about it. You were in a position that most women would kill to be in.” She smiled at me as I stepped out of the dressing room.
“Oh, was I?” I laughed. “I’m just waiting for the lawsuit.”
“I don’t think you have to worry about that with Liam. He might not be too happy about it but I’m sure that he’ll take it in stride. I mean it’s not like you permanently damaged him or anything.”
“I hope not. Now the director wants to see me in his office, so I’m sure I’m going to have to sign some kind of paper saying I will never set foot on the property again.”
“Good luck.” Cheryl patted my shoulder lightly. “You might not have gotten the role, but you certainly had quite an experience.”
Chapter 8
As I walked back down the long corridor, I knew that Cheryl was right. I tried not to be too disappointed in myself. The entire point of this excursion was to promote my ability to get outside my comfort zone. I’d certainly done that. Even if the end result was not what I had expected it to be, the experience was still just as valuable.
I hesitated when I neared the director’s office. He had called a wrap for the rest of the afternoon. I felt like I’d let down the entire crew by not being able to pull off a simple scene. I considered just walking out rather than speaking to the director. Before I could make a decision, the door to his office swung open.
“Samantha, right?”
I nodded. I knew that he knew my name.
“Come inside.” He stepped back from the door so that I could step inside.
He closed the door after me. Despite the building’s being a warehouse, the room that the director was using as an office had been converted into a luxury space. There were two couches, a lush wooden desk, and several framed paintings on the walls.
“Please sit.” He gestured to one of the couches.
I sat down uneasily.
“I’m very sorry for what happened, sir. I didn’t mean to cause so much trouble.”
“These things happen.” He sat down beside me on the couch. “Trust me, the movie business is not without its bloopers. The important thing is how you handle them. Every time you made a mistake it led us to something better.”
“I just hope that I didn’t hurt Liam when I fell on him.” I was slightly relieved that the director didn’t seem as furious as I’d expected him to be.
“Liam’s tougher than he looks.” The director shrugged. “He might be a little traumatized but he’ll be fine. Anyway, that’s not why I called you in here.”
“Oh?”
“Listen, I don’t think you’re right for the scene.” He scooted a little closer to me on the couch.
“Oh, that’s fine. I totally understand.” I stood up to leave.
“Please, sit back down.” He patted the couch beside him.
“Why?” I looked at him skeptically.
“Because you’re the first person that I’ve seen bring such comedy and determination to a role. You’re intuitive, you’re funny—you made the scene come to life in an unexpected and refreshing way. You’re not right for this little bit part in the movie. I want to create another role just for you. One with several scenes.”
I stared at him in disbelief. I knew that he could not be serious.
“But I’m not an actress.” I moved a little closer to the door.
“Or maybe you just don’t know that you are yet. I think if you gave yourself the chance, you could do a great job. You have some real talent with those creative instincts.” He smiled at me.
I stared back at him. I couldn’t tell if he was teasing me, trying to seduce me, or being genuine.
“Well, thank you. But I don’t really think acting is my thing.” I frowned.
The idea of being stuck on set and going through the same scene over and over again while I messed it up over and over again was not my idea of fun.
“I understand. If you really don’t want to, it’s fine. But what
is
your thing?” he asked.
His words hung in my mind. It was a good question. All of this time, as I’d been exploring the items on my bucket list, I’d been trying to get to know myself. Although I enjoyed the things that I’d done, I hadn’t really developed a passion for anything in particular.
“Ya know, I guess I’m still figuring that out.”
“Well, good luck with it. I hope that you find your niche soon. If you ever think about trying out acting again, here’s my card.” He handed me a business card.
I accepted it and tucked it into my pocket. It was a pretty amazing offer.
“Thanks again.” I turned and walked out of his office.
The entire way out of the warehouse, his question lingered in my mind. What was my thing? If I didn’t know what I had a passion for, then how could I ever claim to have a clue who I was? It was actually rather troubling.
I called Max as I drove back to my apartment and asked him to meet me. He agreed. I knew if there was anyone who could look inside me and really know what my passion was, it would be Max. He knew me in ways that always surprised me.
Chapter 9
Not long after I arrived at my apartment, there was a knock on the door. I opened it up and smiled at Max.
“There’s my super star.” His eyes shone with pride as he gave me a quick hug.
I laughed a little at his description.
“I wouldn’t exactly say that.” I turned and walked back into the living room, Max following after me.
“Of course not—you wouldn’t dare say anything good about yourself.” His tone was teasing. He sat down beside me on the couch.
I sighed and pulled my feet up on to the cushion. “I’m getting better about that.”
“So tell me what happened?”
When I glanced over at him he was looking steadily at me.
“I ended up half-naked and lying on top of Liam Roderick.” I smiled.
“What? Well, that’s quite an adventure.” He laughed and scooted closer to me. “I wonder if you want to tell me more about that?”
“Not really. It was a complete disaster. But the funny thing was, the director offered to create a role in the movie for me—
with
several scenes.” I raised an eyebrow. “Is that boasting enough for you?”
“Wow! You’re going to be in a movie with Liam Roderick?” Max jumped up from the couch. “Don’t tell me it’s the new action thriller they’re filming!”
“You know about it?”
“Sure. It’s all about this female serial killer who seduces men and murders them in her own bed—”
“Wonderful. I was playing a serial killer.” I laughed.
“Oh—well, the rumor is that she gets killed off at the beginning of the movie and then Liam discovers that she was only part of an entire ring of killers—”
“Please don’t tell me more.” I stood up and walked into the kitchen. “I think I need wine.”
“Me too, please. Wow, that’s pretty amazing. I can’t believe you got to work with Liam. What was that like?” Max walked into the kitchen with me. He pulled down the wine glasses while I got out a bottle of wine.
“I don’t know. He was pretty firm when I landed on him.”
Max laughed and shook his head as I poured our drinks. “Well, it sounds like you have quite an adventure ahead of you.”
“No, I don’t think so. I turned down the role.”
“Why would you turn it down?”
“Why would I turn down the opportunity to be humiliated and embarrassed on camera?” I looked at him with a slightly raised eyebrow. “Yes, I did turn down that role.”
“I think that if you’d tried it, you might have liked it.” Max smiled so brightly that I could tell he was teasing. I knew that he was very amused by my experience.
“You just want to be able to watch one of those horror movies and say that you know someone in it.” I shook my head. “Not going to be me, buddy. No way. I like my ketchup on my French fries, not all over my body.”
“Hmmm. Interesting visual.” Max’s eyes went wide as if he was imagining the scene. “If French fries were involved, would you consider it?”
“Shut up!” I laughed and smacked him lightly on the arm.
He laughed as well and gave me a quick hug.
“Well, you will always be a star to me. If that helps.”
“It does.” I smiled. “Thanks, Max.”
“You’re welcome. I’ve got to go now. I suddenly have a craving for French fries.”
“You sicko.” I laughed louder as he walked back into the living room. “Max, I do want to ask you something.”
“Oh?” He plopped down on the couch. I sat down beside him. “Ask away.”
“I haven’t figured out what my thing is. Do you know what my thing is?”
“Is this a dirty question?” He sounded hopeful.
“No, not like that. I mean—what is my passion?”
“You’re asking
me
?” He raised an eyebrow. “Don’t you know?”
“I’m not sure. You always seem to know me better than I know myself. So what do you think my thing is?” I turned to look him right in the eyes.
I honestly wanted to know what his insight was. There was no one I trusted to have an idea of who I was more than Max. That was why I valued his friendship above any romantic feelings I might have for him.
“Isn’t it obvious to you?” Max looked confused as he studied me.
“Obviously not.” I laughed. “It’s okay if you don’t know. That’s fine. I just figured out of everyone in the world, you might be the one to know.”
“Well, I do know. I’m just surprised that you don’t.” He set his glass of wine down on the table and turned fully on the couch to face me. “Your passion is writing. It always has been.”
“Writing? Sure, I enjoy it, but I don’t know if I’m passionate about it.” I frowned as I considered it.
“Oh, please. You can talk your way out of any situation. I watch you create stories in your head all of the time.”
“How could you watch me do that?”
“I can just tell.” He smiled.
I didn’t smile. I cringed at the thought of him knowing the stories that I created in my head about
him
all the time.
“I guess you’re right.” I started to feel excited. “I do love to write.”
“Even the way you talk is creative. I always thought you worked at Fluff and Stuff so you could work on some secret novel. I’ve caught you typing away on your computer before.”
“Oh, that’s just my—” I swallowed quickly. I didn’t want Max to know about my blog. I might have revealed too many intimate details on there. “—just a few little projects I’m working on.”
“Okay—and you’re always evasive about it, just like that. So I assumed that’s what you’ve been doing.”
I smiled a little at the idea of writing a secret novel. I loved to write, but could I ever write a novel? That seemed as huge a task as sailing around the world.
“Thanks, Max. You’ve given me something to think about.”
“No problem. Just remember me when Liam Roderick is starring in a movie based on your novel.” He grinned and gave me a light peck on the cheek. “I’ve got to run.”
“Okay, I’ve apparently got a novel to write.”
“You better get on it!” Max walked out the door with his voice drifting behind him.
Chapter 10
I finished my glass of wine while thinking about the experience I’d had that day. Not everything had gone perfectly, but it had gone pretty well. I was looking forward to what I might experience next.
I think the most important thing I’d realized was that was that I loved to be creative. It felt amazing to experience expressing my creativity. It was true that whenever I watched a movie or read a book, I found myself rewriting the scenes in my mind. I had always had a strong interest in writing. That hadn’t changed, no matter how many new experiences I had. It was the first place I turned when I wanted to express my emotions.
My entire journey so far had been about nourishing my body and nourishing my spirit, but I hadn’t been nourishing my passion. It was time for me to let my true talent flow and see where it took me.
I sat down at my computer, prepared to declare my intentions.
As I logged into my blog, I began to wonder what Blue would think of my latest entry. He had been so supportive of every adventure I’d embarked on. I looked forward to his comments and the incredible insight that he always seemed to offer.
As I typed my blog post, I kept coming back to the same realization. Yes, I liked all of the creative outlets I’d been exploring, but writing was my true calling. It was the only time that I felt comfortable being completely honest about how I was feeling and what I hoped to achieve. In conversation, I often found it hard to talk openly about myself, but when my fingertips were gliding over the keys I could confess anything.
When I finished the description of what it was like for me to work with such creative people, I added a small snippet at the end. I confessed that I wanted to be one of those creative people too.
Part of the purpose of my bucket list journey was to explore and discover what my career path should be. Once I’d been content with managing Fluff and Stuff; now I felt a drive—a need for doing something more. I didn’t want to leave my job, but I also didn’t want to hide out in my comfort zone.
It had taken quite a bit of bravery on my part to start a blog in the first place. The idea of actually attempting to write as a career, having my every word scrutinized, was fairly intimidating. But that was the point of my entire journey—to be brave, to be bold, to be confident. I knew that I had a gift with words; I just had to believe in myself enough to give it a shot.
After hitting the publish button on my blog post, I began looking online for a local writing class. Maybe with a little bit of guidance, I’d feel more confident about my writing.