Skeleton Crew (20 page)

Chavez whistled. “That's good,
chola.
How do we let people know where to go?”

“Yeah,” I said, thinking about it, “we can put the word on the street, but the civilians won't know the difference between a juice box and any other business. They could walk into a joint thinking they're safe and get eaten by a stripper.”

“We have to mark them. We could decorate the sanctuaries with marigolds.” I knew what Chavez was thinking—
marigolds were traditional for the
Día de los Muertos
celebrations.

“We'd need a lot of fucking flowers,” I said. “And what's the point of getting all clever about it? These aren't mindless zombies—they'll clue in to the code soon enough.”

“That's true,
chola.
What, then?”

“How about you just tag the juice boxes with the word
sanctuary?
If the zombies want to attack our strong points, I say let them come.”

“The smart zombies will set traps.”

“Oh, yeah. It has to be real tags, then—that's the only thing a clever zombie wouldn't be able to copy.”

“The juice boxes already got plenty of tags,
chola.
We can light them up, make them glow like neon. Our taggers can do that, easy—they learn that shit even before they know how to lay down a tag that can actually do something.”

“Yeah, that works. The taggers aren't going to be any help killing zombies, anyway. Put them on it. Plus, it fits with the acid-in-the-water story Lowell's pushing. Any reporters see that shit, they'll just think they're tripping.”

The line went silent for a few seconds.

“What is it, Chavez?”

“This is it,” he said. “We're real soldiers, D. You talked about us becoming an army that could protect the civilians, but it was just talk before. Now it's real.”

“I guess it is, Raffy. Are you ready?”

“I been waiting on you,
chola.
This shit feels pretty good.”

He was right. Even if no one thanked us for it, wearing the white hat for a change felt pretty damn good.

 

I'd encountered any number of law enforcement officers in my line of work, but only one of them knew who I
was. Only one of them knew
what
I was. All the others got juiced and they wouldn't have been able to pick me out of a lineup even if they somehow got me into one. Detective Meadows was different. She was a sensitive—an otherwise normal human who was tuned in to the supernatural world for whatever reason. She'd tried to put a case on me back in the day. That hadn't worked out for her, but in the course of her investigation she saw enough to realize there were far worse things than me going bump in the night. I'd decided she could be useful to us, but more than that, I'd decided I liked her. Either one would have been enough reason not to put the hoodoo on her.

“Do you know what's happening?” I asked when she picked up.

“I'm murder police, Ms. Riley. I was at a scene and the vic got up and ran off. Is it voodoo?”

“Different kind of zombies. The voodoo kind wouldn't be eating folks. What's the city doing about it?”

“It's better than ninety-two,” Meadows said. “Or at least it would be if this was just a riot. The mayor imposed a curfew. The chief declared a tactical alert and activated the Emergency Operations Center. Patrol officers are being issued tear gas and body armor. And Metro Division has been deployed. That's SWAT.”

“Thanks, Meadows, I actually know quite a lot about you people. Are they fighting the zombies?”

“Not on purpose. B and C Platoons are on riot response and crime suppression missions. You know, they aren't actually aware that zombies are causing most of the rioting. At least they weren't—there have been some incidents and rumors are starting to fly. The water-supply story is good but it's starting to get pretty thin. Otherwise, LAFD is fully mobilized and they're getting mutual aid support from
LASD. The governor called in the National Guard at the mayor's request, but they haven't shown up yet.”

Getting L.A.'s Fire Department and Sheriff's Department involved sounded like a pretty efficient response to a riot. It might even have worked if the actual rioting hadn't been occurring within the context of a full-scale zombie apocalypse. “Everyone who dies is getting back up with a hankering for brains, Meadows. That will include state and municipal government employees. I don't know enough to say whether the response will break even or not.”

“There's not much I can do about it anyway,” Meadows said, “but we probably come out ahead. Frankly, we're leaving the large concentrations for the Guard. From what I've seen, it's not as easy as you'd think for a zombie to take down a victim, especially if they're armed and trained. Like I said, even the firefighters and paramedics have tactical support. No one's taking any chances and attrition should be pretty low, at least for now.”

“Okay, there's rumors going around anyway, maybe we can use that. You want to go for head shots, Meadows. Or decapitation, but cops probably aren't geared up for that. Do enough damage to a zombie's brain, it goes down. It won't destroy it, exactly, but it'll take it out of the game.”

“Those rumors have already started, but I'll help them along. It's like the movies.”

“I guess, but that's the only part that's like the movies. A zombie—at least a fresh one—will be as smart as it was in life, just a lot crazier. Some will be armed. And this isn't a plague, so don't start shooting each other just because someone gets bitten.”

“What are your people doing?”

“We're putting these motherfuckers down, but it's going to take a while. We figured out what caused it and made it
right, so if we can get ahead of it everything will eventually be back to normal. But in the meantime, we have to clear out the existing zombie inventory and stop them from making more.”

“What caused it?”

“You really don't want to know, Meadows. The outfits are setting up sanctuaries on our territory. You see glowing tags, it's our joint and we can protect you there. Help us put the word out. Most of our action is in the city so this won't help much out in the 'burbs, but the densest areas will also have the biggest zombie problem.”

“You'll expose yourselves. You're not going to be able to stay hidden after this.”

“Don't be so sure. We'll juice everyone who comes in a sanctuary. Anyone starts making noise, making people ask questions or think too much, we'll put the hoodoo on them, too. And at the end of the day, civilians believe what they want to believe. You tell them it was acid in the drinking water—oh sure, they knew that kinda thing was happening all along.”

“Well, might be you're right about that,” Meadows said. “Folks don't look too hard at what they don't want to see anyhow.”

“Did you get your family out of town, or are they still in Inglewood?”

“What do you know about my family? And how did you know I live in Inglewood?”

“Stupid question, Meadows. If they're still in town, make sure they know where to go, okay? We'll do our best to take care of them. You can trust me on this.”

“I do. My husband's a paramedic. Might be what you've told me will save his life. Thank you.”

“Okay, do what you can to spread the word the outfits are
on the side of righteousness in this thing. We can do a lot but we'll do it better if Five-oh can give us some space.”

“Are we going to make it through this?” Meadows asked. “Tell me the truth, Riley—should I punch out and spend some time with my family?”

I hesitated before answering. “I like our chances, Detective, but I can't say they're a whole lot better than fifty-fifty. There are a lot of them, and as for our plan, we're pretty much making this shit up as we go along. A lot has to go right and a lot could go wrong. The truth is, I need your help, Meadows. But if I were you? I'd be with my family. I'd lock the doors and keep them close and I'd spend every hour like it was the last.”

 

There were still people I needed to talk to, but I couldn't do it on the phone. I went over to the corner of the room where I'd deposited my old black-and-white TV set and switched it on. The tube gradually warmed up and my jinn familiar appeared on the tiny screen.

“Dominica, you're alive!” he said with mock enthusiasm. Then his face relaxed into its usual expression of bored contempt. “Oh, that's right. Zombies are no threat to the brainless.”

“I'm laughing on the inside, Mr. Clean.”

“I'm caring on the inside.”

“I need your help with the zombies.”

“I already informed you, I do not know what is causing the dead to walk. I speculated that it might be a viral outbreak, and though you demonstrated a certain lack of enthusiasm for my wisdom, you agreed to provide me with three score egg rolls from Shanghai Lucky Chow.”

“It was three dozen.” Mr. Clean apparently really liked egg rolls. It was probably the only thing we had in common.
“And yeah, your wisdom was nowhere to be found on that one, but that's not what I want from you. I need to know if you can help me drop some zombies.”

“They're humans. I can slaughter them like lost sheep.”

“Can you free their spirits?”

“No,” said Mr. Clean, “I can slaughter them like lost sheep.” He raised a large, wickedly curved scimitar and showed it to me. It gleamed, even in black and white.

“It would be better if you could free their spirits,” I said.

The jinn shrugged and the scimitar disappeared. “Still, I'm interested.”

“What do you offer? The timing is rather inconvenient.”

“Fine, why don't you go back to watching
Baywatch
reruns,”

I said.

“
Baywatch
isn't on. There's nothing but news reports, though I am enjoying the coverage.”

I squeezed my eyes shut and rubbed my temples. “What do you want, Mr. Clean? Time is a factor, here.”

“I want you to cook for me.”

“Fine,” I said. “I'll cook naked. I hope you like frozen burritos.” I needed to wrap this up, and he could probably spy on me in the shower, anyway.

“I already spy on you in the shower,” said the jinn. “This will be a bounty. One meal for every head I bring you.”

“One meal for every
zombie
head. I deduct two meals for every head that doesn't blink or try to bite me. And you're back in the box when I say so.”

“Done,” said Mr. Clean. “You will likely wish to arrange warehouse space.”

“What? Why?”

“The heads,” said the jinn. “There will be thousands of them.” Mr. Clean grinned and the screen filled with static.

 

Traffic in Hollywood is usually insane even without a zombie apocalypse underway. I spun my traffic spell and wove my way slowly through the gridlock to the Carnival Club. I parked on the street and went inside. The club was full and I was the only human in the place. No one was partying—the sidhe were all armed and formed up in orderly ranks, receiving orders from their commanders. I found Oberon sitting with Titania in a booth in the VIP section. I slid into the booth and picked up the bottle of tequila waiting for me on the table. I looked at the simple parchment label and whistled.

“Ilegal Mezcal,”
I said. “You must want to apologize.” I broke the wax seal, uncorked the bottle and poured.

“It seemed appropriate for this meeting,” Oberon said. “I do regret the way we left things at the school.”

“From what little he's said about it, he was a jerk,” Titania said. “But he wasn't lying, Domino. We cannot bring more of the Court across without sufficient magic to sustain them.”

“I offered to let him pull juice from my territory. I guess that wasn't enough.”

Titania glanced at her husband and frowned. The king looked decidedly uncomfortable. He picked up his glass and gulped the tequila.

“You should sip that,” I said. “You can slam Cuervo Gold shots the next time you're at a frat party.”

“Why are we here, Domino?” the king said. “Harsh words were exchanged between us, yes, but we reached an agreement. We are fulfilling our part of it.”

I swallowed tequila and shook my head. “I'm not sure anymore how I fell into all this,” I said. “A few months ago I was just a gangster making sure the outfit's rackets were
doing what they needed to do. Now the world is falling apart and I'm trying to hold it together another day. And that's not so bad, except every time I turn around you've got your hand in my pocket.”

“I have a responsibility to my people, Domino.”

“I get that. I even understand you need to expand your territory. I knew that right from the start. I wish you the best, Oberon, I really do. Near as I can tell, you're no worse than any other politician we got pretending to run the show. But we're supposed to be allies. We help each other because it's in our best interests. If a demon crashes your party, I help put it down. I don't pause to work out a payment plan with you first. You say you owe me for it, I say whatever makes you happy. But then, if my city is turning into zombieland you don't work me over for the best deal you can get. You give me a hug and go drop as many fucking zombies as you can. That's the way it's supposed to be.”

“You're asking me to trust you, Domino. It is not an easy thing to trust a human sorcerer.”

“Well, then, frankly we're all fucked, King. We can't do this shit the gangster way. It's too big. This act is just getting warmed up and already I'm a couple days away from losing Greater L.A. Seventeen million people. And once the city is dead you'll be too busy picking demons out of your underwear drawer to worry about expanding your territory. Oberon, Titania, I need you to line up with me on this.”