Snow Angel (19 page)

“Do you think killing a man is that easy? Don't be a fool. He'd likely kill you … or worse.” He turned from her and stared at the flowing water of the stream, its peaceful trickling belying the scene it witnessed.

He wrestled with the silence and then, looking up to the sky, he growled out, “You would see me drawn and quartered, then? Stretched out on this rack indefinitely?” He laughed harshly then turned to Elizabeth. “So be it. I'll stay.” He swung away from her and stalked out of the camp.

Elizabeth watched him go, feeling wretched. But she couldn't speak; she was too relieved.

After three days of mostly silence from Noah, Elizabeth decided she had to do something to goad him into talking again. She had shown him some basic mining techniques, but he was more interested in working on the lean-to, which was beginning to take the shape of a cabin. She would pan all day, with little results, and he would hunt and build and cook.

After dinner one night, she stood and stretched. “I think I'll take a bath.”

Noah scowled. “No, you won't.”

Elizabeth ignored him and moved to the lean-to, gathering clean clothes and soap.

He growled at her. “You can't take a bath in that muddy creek with all of these men around. It's crazy. And the water is too cold.”

Elizabeth slanted him a coy look. “Call me crazy then. I haven't had a real bath in weeks, and I'm taking one.”

She thought if he glared at her any harder his eyes might just pop out.

“Fine. But don't yell for me if you need help. I warned you.”

“I wouldn't dream of it,” she replied tartly.

Dipping her toes into the water, she called herself a thousand kinds of stubborn fools. With a sun that now never slept, just faded for a few hours, there was entirely too much day
light to guarantee any modesty. And the water
was
freezing. But she was determined. Stripping down to her drawers, she waded quickly to her waist, teeth chattering, and began soaping herself. She grimaced as she felt the bottom of the creek bed oozing mud and rocks between her toes. Swallowing hard, she tried not to think about what might be in the water, swimming around her bare legs. It was amazing the comfort and sense of security one's boots provided. Redoubling her speed, she bent at the waist and wet her hair, lathering it quickly with soap. Something brushed against her calf, making her shiver. She was just about to scramble out when she heard it: the laugh that haunted her nightmares and sent tingles of alarm along the bony column of her back.

“You didn't really think I would just give up, did you?”

She sank down into the water, covering herself with crossed arms. Teeth chattering, she demanded in a low voice, “Get off my claim, Ross.”

He laughed again, low and menacing. “The claim bought with my money? You are sadly mistaken if you think I will leave until I get what I want, my dear.”

The cold water numbed all but her fear and anger. She knew anger to be her ally here and latched onto it. “You got what you wanted. What do you think I have left?”

“I want what is rightfully mine, Elizabeth. You cheated me and you will pay for that.”

“I'll pay you back the money I took as soon as the claim pays. I don't have anything else to give you.” She backed up until the stream reached her neck.

“I think you do. And this time, when I'm finished with you there won't be anything left for that big fellow you are
currently with.” He eyed her body through the water. “You have been playing the whore, haven't you, Elizabeth? I'll have to find some special way of compensating myself for such used goods.” His face hardened with a look that made her stomach twist. He picked up her blouse from the ground and held it in the air. “Get out.”

She shook her head in terror. She would freeze to death first, and from the lack of feeling in her legs, she very likely would. “I'll make a deal with you,” she blurted out in desperation. “If you will leave me alone, I'll give you half of any gold I find.”

His laugh was a wolf's snarl. His eyes, black and deadly, glittered in the pale light. “You don't really think I came all this way for the money, do you? You are more of a fool than I thought, Elizabeth. We have more to settle than that, you and I. Your hasty departure ruined all of my carefully laid plans. You will pay for that, don't ever doubt it. Now, get out.”

Marshalling her anger, her hate, she spat, “You will never touch me again. Now, get off my claim.” What she wouldn't give for her pistol right now.

“Such bravado from a lone, naked woman. You are not thinking your friend will save you, are you?”

She heard the click of a gun and saw a shiny glint in the pale light as he waved it in the air. “By all means, please, call your precious Noah Wesley. He will come charging to your rescue and right into my hands.” He shrugged. “If he persists in hanging around, I'll have to get him out of the way at some point, anyway. Why not now?” The smile was back. He was so confident, so evil, she felt her strength drain away.

He leveled the gun on her. “Get out. We can't have you freezing to death and ruining all my fun, now can we?”

With her chest pounding with fear, she took a step forward.

“Stop!”

Elizabeth felt a rush of relief as she recognized Noah's voice. He had a long rifle pointing mere inches from Ross's back. “Drop it, Ross.”

Elizabeth watched as Ross's face changed from leering expectancy to composed rage. Slowly, he lowered the gun to his side.

“Lay it on the ground.” Noah's voice was as calm and steady as the gently lapping water. When the gun was on the ground, he said, “Turn around and face me.”

Ross turned.

“Now, Elizabeth, get out and get dressed. Go straight to the fire and stay there. I aim to settle this once and for all.”

Elizabeth didn't like the sound of that, but she was happy to obey. What would he do? Moving as fast as her frozen limbs could carry her, she reached the bank and her clothes. Quickly, she wrapped the towel around her and scurried through the grass. Back at the fire, she threw on her clothes then ran to her bedroll, searching wildly beneath it. She firmly grasped the pistol and hurried back to the bank. The tall weeds shielded her from view as she crouched down and strained to hear.

“… I'm telling you now, if you hurt her, I'll see to it that you're behind bars. You don't have any right to treat her that way, even if you are her husband.”

Ross laughed low and fearless. “Her husband, eh? Is that what she told you? The little fraud. What is she taking you
for? Quite a ride from the looks of things. I never knew what to believe with her either, but her husband? That is a good one.” He laughed again. “Don't look so glum, fella. You must have been a prime target for her, living alone in the frozen wilderness like you do. Me? I should have known better. She and I are cut from the same cloth, you know. Did she tell you about us? Probably not everything, and you do want to know, don't you? Let me tell you what she did to me.”

Elizabeth's heart hammered harder, shame filling her, as he ruthlessly continued. “She made a bargain with me back in Seattle. Nothing hidden, a straightforward business deal. In return for the favor of her,” he stretched out his arms at the great expanse, “Alaskan holiday, she would, shall we say, share my bed until I tired of her. Then she decided to cheat me. She stole all of my money and ran off without even a good-bye. Imagine my heartbreak. I figure she owes me. As for being her husband … ha! What kind of fool would marry a lying, conniving little thief like Elizabeth Dunning?”

Elizabeth's heart wrenched in the long silence that followed.

“I don't believe you,” Noah answered back, but he didn't sound certain.

“Don't you?” came the smooth reply. “Think about it. Doesn't it make some of the pieces to the puzzle fit?”

Elizabeth clenched her teeth, waiting for Noah's response. She jerked as she heard the gun go off.

“Get out of here and don't ever let me see you again. I'll kill you if you come near her.”

She heard movement and then Ross's laugh farther off. “Sorry, she will never want you. I have what she wants and she
will come to me for it.” A short pause and another laugh, farther off, then … “I know her real name.”

Elizabeth sat there in the tall weeds for a long time, waiting … feeling numb.

“Is it true?”

His voice was closer. She couldn't answer, couldn't even move.

Suddenly, he was grasping her by the shoulders, kneeling beside her. “Is it true? Did you lie about him being your husband? Did you agree to such a bargain with him and steal yourself a ticket to Alaska? Elizabeth, tell me.”

She looked up into his eyes, tormented eyes, and saw the depths of the pain she had brought into his life. A sob broke from her throat. “Yes, yes, it's true. It's true and more.”

He pulled her close, forcing her to hold his gaze. “Why?”

When she didn't answer, couldn't answer, just stared at him, he let go of her and backed away as if he'd touched something unclean. His last words slipped out in a whisper, fell to the ground with a dark thud and rolled through all her protective walls to pierce her heart.

“And to think I almost married you.”

Scorching pain made her fall back. “And now you know why I wouldn't let you,” she whispered.

* * *

NOAH RUSHED BACK to their camp, his breathing heavy and sick. What had he done? Chased a stranger halfway across a continent? Yes, a stranger—that's what she was. He could
hardly contain his feelings. Looking up into the night sky he railed, “Why? What was all this for?” The stars twinkled back at him, so sure and bright in their creation.

Forgiveness is not for the good.

He hadn't heard the voice in a long time and didn't really want to hear it now. “Forgiveness? For what? Being someone she's not? For making me believe she was someone she's not?” He felt like shaking his fist but set his hands on his hips instead—daring God to answer.

Seeing only what you wanted to see, perhaps?

Noah felt the words hit to his core. Was it he that needed her forgiveness? Yes, she had lied to him—broken his heart even—but hadn't he stubbornly clung to what he thought Elizabeth should be instead of seeing her as she really was—a survivor of terrible circumstances. A woman with strengths that he had only seen as hardness, something to change and fix. It was just those circumstances that had made her who she was … and he loved who she was. Her fierceness … her vulnerability … her laughter and her face with laughter on it. Her determination to be strong … her elation when she was … her tears when she was weak and the willingness to let him see her weakness … her very self. Elizabeth. Then he realized … he loved her just as she was.

Before he had time to change his mind or even reason it through, he rushed back to the tall grass where he had left her.

She sat in the twilight, her knees up and her head down on them, her arms curled protectively around her legs. She looked so fragile, her slender shoulders weighted with burdens she should not be carrying, a burden he had added to. Something
inside him broke, like a dam, and he felt a rush of compassion for her. Kneeling next to her he touched her gently on the shoulder, tears of his own making cold, wet tracks of sorrow and repentance on his cheeks.

She jerked up and away from him. “Go away … go back to Juneau where you belong.” Her words were strong and he marveled at her strength—hard won and tempered like steel to a deadly sharpness. He smiled a slow, sad, happy smile, realizing that in knowing its source it could not pierce him. He remembered suddenly what she had last said to him, why she had lied about being married. “And now you know why I wouldn't let you,” she had said. If she loved him at all, he suddenly understood what that lie must have cost her.

“Elizabeth … I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. It was the shock, and my own weakness. I haven't wanted to see the truth anymore than you've wanted to say it.”

She stared up at him, confusion evident in the endless pools of her deep brown eyes.

“Listen to me,” he said, “it doesn't matter. Not Ross or your past or anything else you could tell me. Elizabeth … I love you.”

Suddenly Elizabeth was a she-cat, clawing and kicking at him. “Stop it! Don't say something you will regret.”

He let her thrash for a moment and then quieted her in his strong embrace. “I won't regret it.”

She stilled and then lashed out with a better weapon. “You don't know the half of it. What if I told you I've learned the backside of honesty like you know your land. Loving grandparents are for fairy tales, and profitable farms in Illinois are pipe dreams. Black, dark voids live in me where silent
orphanages and parent slave owners dwell. I've stolen more than food or money or anything I could put my hands to. I've stolen courage and honest work from the backs of others. I've stolen truth from situations that weren't working to my advantage. I'm a past master at knowing how to work people—get what I want from them. It's as natural as my breath, and I did it to you and Will and Cara and every living soul who has ever touched me. Ross said we were cut from the same cloth and he's right. Living with me would mean sucking the life out of you until you had nothing left to give.” Her voice lowered to a mere harsh whisper. “I would use you … not love you.”

He felt it again, that searing pain that connected him with her emotions. It was overwhelming, overpowering. With fresh tears in his eyes he whispered back, “Take it. Take my love … even unto my death. I'll give it all for you.”

She let out a sob that turned into a wail. “I would destroy you,” she choked out.

Taking her face between his hands he looked deeply into her eyes, willing her to believe him. “No … no you wouldn't. My love is strong enough for both of us. Let me love you … Elizabeth … the woman you are right here, right now. If I could take away the pain of your suffering I would, but I can't. All I can do is suffer it with you, help you carry it. Elizabeth, let me love you.”