Solipsis: Escape from the Comatorium (11 page)

“
I
think you'll find that I didn't say you had confirmation bias, I said
that intelligent design is evidence of confirmation bias.”

“
You
implied it! Don't make vague attacks, say it clearly and stand behind
it.”

“
Confirmation
bias is not an insult or an implication of stupidity. From my
perspective, Dr. Lazarus shows evidence of confirmation bias, but I
also think that he's a very intelligent person. He's in a position we
call cognitive dissonance. His intellect is such that he understands
the scientific worldview, he can appreciate it, and he knows that
it's not easily dismissed. And yet his confirmation bias based on his
faith and years of indoctrination gives him the contradicting message
that science must be wrong. The brain is perfectly capable of
thinking one thing in one place, and the completely opposite thing in
another. I believe, from my biased perspective, that Dr. Lazarus has
faith, he 'knows in his heart' that god exists. His worldview must
follow from that position of faith. So rather than objectively sit
back and weigh the evidence, his faith is interjected into the
equation. If I've made sacrifices to the god of agriculture every
year, slaughtering goats and even people to appease this god, and one
day a neighbor tells me that these sacrifices don't do anything, I'm
going to be resistant. I'm not going to embrace the idea that I've
been wrong and been wasting these sacrifices. So instead of equally
weighing the evidence for this god with the evidence for this new
theory, I'm going to assume that my god is real until someone really
proves otherwise. I have not invested anything in the existence of
free will. I have no bias on the subject. There's just no reason for
me to think that it must exist until proven otherwise. When I looked
at the facts, with my brain which is unhampered by confirmation bias
or the sunk cost fallacy, then I'm left with an objective view of the
data. The data clearly tells me that there is no such thing as free
will.”

As the debate finishes, Dr.
Lazarus disappears into a swarm of followers. Nellie and Renee leave
the stage amongst no crowd at all.

“
No
wonder they love him,” Renee says. “He makes it easier to
believe in fairy tales. Like you said about confirmation bias, they
hear all the scientists saying things that go against their religion,
so that causes doubt. But then, when someone who looks and sounds
like a scientist says something they agree with, they can then
pretend that the existence of a debate in the scientific community
means that science is no longer against them.”

“
That
sounds about right.”

“
They
really look like a cult. How can anyone be so excited to see some old
guy?”

“
Technically
they're a church.”

“
How
do you define a cult?” Renee asks.

“
I'm
not sure of the exact definition,” Nellie replies. Renee
already had the definition floating in front of her.

“
A
cult is defined as a religious group or other kind of movement whose
beliefs and/or practices are considered abnormal or bizarre,”
Renee reads aloud.

“
That's
the problem with that word, it's so subjective.”

“
Well,
around here, all religious beliefs are considered bizarre,”
Renee replies. Nellie nods. “Cult it is.”

Renee watches Nellie look
through numerous medical charts and displays. “Bored?”
Nellie asks.

“
Obviously.”

“
In
a few minutes I have a consultation with a patient and his father,”
Nellie turns to Renee, looking quite serious. “I want you to
sit with the boy in the next room while I talk to his father.”

“
A
boy? Like my age?”

“
Yeah.”

“
Alright,”
Renee perks up, “I can do that.”

“
Just
try to distract him, he's going to be nervous.”

“
Why?”

“
Because
he's dying, and they've come here to see if I can save him.”

A moment later, there's a knock
at the door. Dr. Lazarus enters with his fourteen-year-old son Seth.
In a moment, Renee is sitting next to Seth in total silence in the
side office. Seth doesn't appear sick. He's skinny, sure, but not
sickly, and he has a thick head of hair.

Seth finally breaks the silence,
“Why did you look so shocked when we walked in?”

“
I
did?”

“
Yeah.”

“
I
wasn't expecting to see, Dr. Lazarus,” Renee says.

“
Why?”

“
I
don't know,” Renee says, “I just wasn't expecting him.”

“
You
don't like him, do you?”

“
I
didn't know he existed until a few hours ago.”

“
But
you don't like him, I can tell.”

“
I'm
more bewildered than anything else,” Renee says, “I've
never met a Christian before.”

“
I'm
a Christian,” Seth replies.

“
I
figured,” Renee replies.

“
What
does that mean?”

“
Just
that your dad's a Christian so you probably are, that's the way these
things spread.”

“
You
say that like Christianity is a disease,” Seth replies testily.

“
Sorry,
I didn't mean anything by it. I'm just not used to this. I mean,
imagine you met a stranger and they turned out to be a Zeus
worshiper, it would catch you off-guard.”

Seth grimaces and looks away
from her. He taps his foot nervously and strains to listen to the
muffled voices coming through the door.

“
Is
Lazarus really your last name?” Renee asks, trying to interrupt
his anxious focus on the next room.

“
No,”
he says, looking away, annoyed at her attempts to impede his
listening.

“
I
thought it sounded fake,” Renee replies.

“
Can
you just be quiet?” It's not really a question. Sweat drips
down his neck, she can practically see his racing pulse bursting
through his skin.

“
Why
did your dad change his last name?”

“
It's
like a stage name, he became this whole persona.”

“
Why?”

“
I
don't know, to sell books, what's it to you?” Seth asks,
annoyed.

“
Just
curious.”

“
Why,
what's your last name?”

“
I
don't think I have one,” Renee replies.

“
That's
pretty weird,” Seth says coldly. They sit in silence. Renee
sighs, having seemed to fail at the simple task of maintaining a
conversation. Seth looks at her solemn face and feels bad for the
tone he had used.

“
Have
you always lived here?” Seth asks.

“
Why?”
Renee responds curtly.

“
Well
you said you've never met a Christian. So you must have lived here
your whole life. Are there really no Christians here?”

“
Well,”
Renee has to think about it, “I don't think so.”

“
What's
it like living here?”

“
I
guess I don't have anything to compare it to.”

The door opens. Seth looks to
their faces for any hints. They both try hard to keep their
expressions as neutral as possible, which tells him everything he
needs to know. He slumps in his seat. Renee watches and listens as
Nellie breaks the news to Seth that there is nothing they can do for
him. Vivisection can save a healthy brain from a dying body. Seth's
issue is his brain, and thus vivisection will do nothing to prolong
his life, and since it's a risky procedure, it may shorten it. She
goes on to explain that his condition is not in advanced stages and
he may have many years left. Dr. Lazarus is silent as the news is
broken to his son. He stares at the floor, and as soon as Nellie
finishes, he takes Seth and heads for the exit.

Renee stares in awe at Nellie.
“How can you do that? How can you tell someone they're going to
die?”

“
Part
of the job.”

“
Do
you do this kind of thing every day?”

“
Not
every day, but frequently.”

“
That's
heartbreaking. How do you do that and then come home and be a person.
How do you handle that?”

“
You
get used to it. What's the alternative? Just stay in Solipsis and
mentally masturbate my way through games and movies and pretend
everything's great? There are real people who are suffering. I can
help them. What am I going to do, waste that talent?”

Percival
sits in the glass observation dome, smoking a pipe and watching the
stars in the skybox high above. Renee quietly enters, watching him
silently. He stares wide-eyed at the artificial stars. Renee looks up
at the sky to see what's so compelling. “They are beautiful,”
she thinks, “but fake.” The bright band of the Milky Way
Galaxy pours clearly across the sky, much more clearly than visible
on Earth, no matter how remote and free from light pollution you
might go. Percival takes another puff from his large wooden pipe.

“
I
don't know what you see in them,” Renee says. Percival is
startled, having not sensed her enter. “Didn't mean to scare
you.”

“
It's
okay, I'm just a little paranoid,” Percival says.

“
Why?”

“
Just
have a seat,” Percival beckons. Renee joins him, sitting back
and looking at the stellar display. “Aren't they beautiful?”

“
Yeah,”
Renee agrees weakly.

“
I
know what you're thinking. They aren't fake. This is the night sky as
it would have appeared about four billion years ago. When the Earth
had just formed, it would still have been totally molten, just a drop
of liquid rock floating in space around a young star. We're still a
resident of the stellar nursery. Magnificent isn't it.”
Percival takes another puff from his pipe. “Don't you see. We
are a part of the universe. 'We're a way for the universe to know
itself.' Did you ever get to any Carl Sagan?”

“
No.”

“
He
had a great quote,” Percival sits up excitedly, smiling, a
twinkle in his eye, “it goes, Hydrogen is a tasteless odorless
gas that if left alone long enough will turn into people.”