Somebody's Someone (11 page)

I thought ’bout God and his book right then, ’cause as we passed the brown apartment houses on the right-hand side, where I was sittin’, I knowed I was almost home. All of a sudden I could feel my belly pulling itself all tight-like.

Even though I was happy to be going back home, I was still scared of Lula Mae and what she might do to me. Come to think on it, she wasn’t all I was ’fraid of. I was also worried ’bout how I was gonna get on with that crazy-ass Donna Janine and all the stuff that folks would be sho’ to say ’bout me. The more I thought on these things, the more something inside of me just didn’t care. I felt like from here on out, I could take on anybody who tried to do me wrong. I didn’t have to stay where I wasn’t wanted—I’d just be more careful runnin’ away if I had to do it again.

When I recognized the 7-Eleven store out the bus window, I knew it was my stop. Pulling the cord, I told the driver that I needed to get off at the next corner. As I stepped down from the bus, my mind wouldn’t let me believe that I was in walking distance of the house and people that I had run off and left without no word. I knew deep in me that I’d done bad. I’d learned in church that just b’cause somebody does you wrong don’t mean you should do wrong by them. Still, as I walked the dirt trail that led back to the house, I touched my arms and r’membered the blows that slammed against my skin.

A cool wind came from inside me and crawled up my back as my skin turned to gooseflesh under my fingertips. I would never forget that whoopin’. Feelin’ the scabs on my arms, I couldn’t help but wonder if the way I was treated out at Big Mama’s was the same way they’d done Ruby. I heard tell that my mama got whoopin’s once a week, and I could only ’magine what that must’ve been like for her. I wondered if Ruby’d ever run off when she was my age. Or if she hit back whoever was doing the beating. Something inside my head told me that maybe that’s why Ruby left and never came back. Even so, I just didn’t understand why she’d leave us with the same folks that she herself’d run from.

I let the questions I had no answers for make they way ’cross my mind. I couldn’t help but wish for Ruby to come and make it all a li’l bit easier. As I walked, I pictured Ruby on her way, just like when Cindy and any other of the Brady kids would cry and Carol or Alice would try and make ’em feel better. I knowed my mama could do this for me too, if she could come.

As I rounded the bend, where the grass field with the overgrown pussy willow and cattails sep’rated our property from the new apartment homes that was being built up, I seen the driveway that led up to Aint Bobbie’s front porch. Daddy Lent’s old blue Chevy pickup was parked where it usually was when he wasn’t working or fishing, which was in the long dirt driveway.

I also seen Aint Bobbie’s Plymouth, newly wrecked, hanging out from under the carport and couldn’t believe that in the time I was gone she’d already ruined another car. I like Aint Bobbie even though her kids was the worst children I’d ever laid eyes on. But if you let her tell it, they was God’s gifts to the heavens. I didn’t have to agree. Rumor had it that Aint Bobbie’s kids all had different daddies and that’s why they was so wild. I guess it didn’t matter much, as long as they had daddies. One thing was for sure, Aint Bobbie seemed to have no better luck with men than she did cars, ’cause every time you turned round she’d wrecked another one.

Since Aint Bobbie’s house was in the front of Big Mama’s, I went to her back door and let myself in. I found myself in the room where Bobbie kept her yellow squash-colored chesterfield, still wrapped up in the plastic it came in. She didn’t want nobody sitting on it, in case they was to mess it up. I never understood that. Why come she just didn’t buy a plastic couch to begin with? I made my way to Bobbie’s room. The air conditioner was on, and I could hear it hummin’ as the air blew about the place, keeping it nice and cool. I looked closer and saw that Bobbie and her baby was sound asleep. I didn’t wanna wake ’em up, so I sat down at the foot of her bed, like I had done a hundred times b’fore.

Outta all of Johnnie Jean Thornhill’s natural kids, Bobbie was the nicest. She had a real quiet way ’bout herself. But lately she was always sick. Folks say it was ’cause she had too many kids outta wedlock. I didn’t know what that mean, but I still liked Bobbie the best—even though I figured that wedlock was something that was like a cootie. Every now and again, Aint Bobbie’d try and act like Lula, and start whoopin’ on me and then get mad if I made a sound ’bout how bad it hurt. This one time Aint Bobby hit me so hard ’cross my legs, my whole left kneecap swelled up like a water ballon. I r’member I choked my cries off into my throat and sat and rocked my knee, hugging it up to my chest like it was a child that had hurt itself. Even though her hitting me hurt more than Lula Mae’s hits, I still decided to like her and wasn’t sore at her for too long. I think one of the main reasons I was nice to Bobbie was ’cause whenever I wanted to know about my mama, Bobbie would tell me. She said that even though I asked too many doggone questions, she didn’t mind answering them as long as I helped her clean her house as we talked. She told me that Ruby had red hair to match her temper, and that she was fast with the boys. She also said that I should watch my way with the men. I r’member thinking to myself that Bobbie didn’t have nothin’ to worry ’bout; I had decided a long time ago that I wasn’t gonna be like my mama.

Bobbie also told me that my mama had a chipped front tooth that she got from one of Big Mama’s retarded cousins. She said that one day, when Ruby was my age, or so ’bout, she was drinking a Chocolate Soldier soda water, which was her favorite, and retarded cousin Stewy ran up and slammed the bottle into Ruby’s tooth just to see what would happen. Accordin’ to Bobbie, Ruby beat the crap out the dim-witted boy, and that just added to folks believing she was cold-hearted. I didn’t care nothin’ ’bout the cold-heart part, but I sure did come to hate that Stewy fella. And if I ever got a chance I was gonna do the same thing to him. Secretly I felt sorry for Ruby on account of her chipped tooth and thought that one day I’d let her know that.

I heard the baby start to cry, and I looked up to see Bobbie waking up too. It took her a minute to adjust her eyes, and in seconds, she asked me, “What you doing here, Gina?” As I was ’bout to talk, I heard what I thought was police sirens getting closer and closer. Bobbie peeked out the corner of the window, and once the curtain was back, I could see the orange-and-red lights of the police car shining through into the room. My head started pounding ’long with those siren sounds. I got up on the bed with Bobbie and sat and watched with her as the police car came to a stop—not in the driveway, like most decent folk would know to do, but dead smack in the middle of Aint Bobbie’s fresh-cut lawn. The driver got out and motioned towards Big Mama, who was cutting him off at the gate. I couldn’t read lips, so I didn’t know what they was saying. I just watched to see what was coming next.

It didn’t take long to figure it out. My eye caught sight of a car that I had seen for the first time earlier that day! It pulled up on the grass and parked right next to the policeman. I thought I had died and gone straight to hell. I didn’t have to worry ’bout reading lips no more, ’cause Carlene talked loud ’nough for the whole block to hear!

“Officer, Officer,” she yelled out, as she ran to the man dressed in all black, with a silver gun hanging from a loop on the side of his belt. “I want you to go in there and get my brother’s chile.” I heard and watched Carlene scream at the policeman. Her hand was waving through the air as she pointed at Big Mama’s house. The officer never had time to answer her before she was making her way towards the gate that separated the two yards from one another. Carlene looked like she was gonna pull out a switchblade and go to town on anybody that got in her way. I could hear her yellin’ to find out where I was at.

“She ain’t round here no mo’!” Big Mama screamed back at Carlene from the steps of her house, where she usually sat, chewing her snuff and wearing that faded red pocketbook round her neck. “I ain’t seen her in well ova’ a week.” This must’ve sent Carlene into a hissy fit, ’cause she had to be held back by the policeman, who wouldn’t let her pass by him. The policeman seemed to be caught b’tween two fussing women, not knowing what to do. I watched as he placed the heel of his hand on the rounded part of his pistol and rested. Finally he was able to get a word in.

“Now, y’all, just calm down! Ya hear?” he scolded. “Otherwise, I’m gonna have to haul your tails downtown.”

That was all I needed to hear. I slipped back from the window and watched as Aint Bobbie lay, barely holding her baby in her arms. The baby started whining, and Bobbie had to turn to loosen her hold on her, and as she did, I seen that one of the things on her chest that used to feed her child was gone. All that was left was a long thick line held together by black thread.

“What you staring at, girl? Didn’t yo’ mama teach you not to study folks too long?” What was she talkin’ ’bout? She knowed the answer to that question betta’ than anybody—my mama’d barely taught me my name. My eyes caught Bobbie’s as she caught mine in the act of gawking. I’d never seen such a sight. Her skin was sagging a bit, like it barely wanted to hang on to her body. In her face I could see the bones of the Cherokee that Big Mama’d told us kids ’bout, when telling where her peoples came from. It was in Aint Bobbie that the signs of Injun blood showed most. But now, Bobbie’s face was gone. What was left in its place was caved-in cheeks, deep ’nough to be mistaken for small bowls. I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t paid much mind to Bobbie b’fore now, ’cause the last I seen her she didn’t look so bad. All I could do was sit and stare.

I was so busy thinking on Aint Bobbie’s cheeks that I didn’t see Big Mama come in behind me. “Get under the bed, girl! Hurry up ’fo’ somebody see ya!” She was panting like a billy goat and pushing me under the bed at the same time. “Cain’t nobody know you here. You see what ya done gone and done?” Big Mama was talking so fast I couldn’t hear all of what she was saying, but I knowed from the sound of it all that I wasn’t gonna get no
Little House on the Prairie
greeting upon my return. So much for hugs and kisses wrapped in words like “baby,” and “I’m glad you come home.” I guess in God’s plan there was things that was meant to be and things that wasn’t.

The fussing in the front yard was now a bundle of nonsense to my ears; I couldn’t hear nothing from under the bed. Big Mama’d disappeared as quickly as she had come. I watched her shuffle her feet ’cross the floor, on her way to finish Miss Carlene off. As I lay in wait to be free, I couldn’t help but wonder what was gonna happen to me. Was Big Mama gonna be mad that I came back and secretly plan with Lula Mae to torture me so that I would leave again? After all, they always said that I was way too much work, and that I needed more than anybody had to give. Well, the way I saw it was that if I gave just a little bit more nice, then maybe I wouldn’t have to work so hard to get them to like me. No matter what happened, I was glad to be back home. And I promised to God that I would be betta’ and less troublesome.

“Come on out from unda’ dere, Gina. They all gone now.” Big Mama was on her hands and knees staring at me. Her eyes was stuck behind glasses that made her look like she’d strapped a magnifyin’ glass to her face. She grabbed an arm and started pulling me out from under the bed. Once I was out, Big Mama didn’t ask no questions. She told me to be quiet and to make my way over to the other house. I did as I was told. As I got outside, I saw that the lights that usually showed the way b’tween Aint Bobbie’s house and Big Mama’s wasn’t on. As a matter of fact, there was no lights on anywhere, making me think that Big Mama’d forgot to pay the electricity bill again. We headed round to the back door, stumbling over oak tree roots and rocks and wheelbarrows as well as anything else that got in the way. I waited for my eyes to adjust to the darkness, to give way to a shape that I recognized—but they didn’t. After more tripping and toe stubbing, we got to the back side of the green-roofed house. Daddy Lent let us in. Everybody else was sleeping, so I tiptoed to my bed, trying real hard to be mindful of Doretha, so as not to wake her up. I crawled in next to my sister and settled against her flesh. I was back home. My insides was hopping all round, dancin’ to the thought of seeing my sister the next day. I wanted to see if she missed me any—even though I knowed she prob’ly didn’t. I was hoping that my being gone was gonna make her wanna be nicer to me. One thing was for certain— when you really think you cain’t stand somebody, all you have to do is leave ’em for a while to know that the heart has a mind of its own, and mine had kinda missed my sister.

I lay ’wake on my side of the bed for a while. I was glad to notice I still had a side of the bed—Doretha must’ve thought I’d one day be back, and decided to leave my place in the bed open for me. Maybe in her heart she missed me. I heard the rise and fall of Doretha’s breath and knew that she was dead asleep and would be madder than a bull if I woke her up. Since I had been asleep under Bobbie’s bed, it wasn’t hard for me to fall back into sleep again. In no time a’tall, me and Sister was breathing to the beat of the same drummer.

I woke up to Big Mama shaking me and telling me to get up fast. I couldn’t move quick ’nough for her, ’cause the next thing I knowed she was pulling the covers offa me, letting the morning air steal the sleep that had been all mine throughout the night.

“Hurry up, chile, and get yo’ mouthwash. We ain’t got all day.” Every morning before I was allowed to open my mouth and talk to anyone, I had to gargle my mouth out with the cinnamon rinse that Big Mama had bought just for me. She said my breath smelled like something had crawled up and died right there on my tongue. I was so used to hearing that I couldn’t r’member when I stopped being ’shamed of it. While I was swishin’ round the cinnamon, Big Mama was yelling at me to hurry up, saying that Cousin Eli was on his way to get us. Cousin Eli was Big Mama’s youngest cousin from her ma’s side. He usually came round when Big Mama needed to tend to business that was outta town, but not far ’nough away where you’d have to take a bus. I took the red liquid and poured a small bit into the top of the bottle and threw it into my mouth. I turned the back of my throat on, and the mouthwash started jumping round like in a washing machine.