Soulful Strut (39 page)

“Yeah. Looks okay.”

“Candi is waiting outside. Sure you don’t
want to wait for Danica and let her do this? She’ll be back from
that conference Monday.” Kim seemed willing to delay the unpleasant
task.

“No, I got her into this mess, and it’s up to
me to fix it.” Monette had talked to Danica that morning. They’d
both agreed Candi wasn’t right for the program. Her attitude
guaranteed that she would continue to give them problems.

“If you’re ready, I’ll bring her in,” Kim
said.

“Fine.” Monette smoothed down her blouse and
skirt nervously.

“Don’t know what all this crap is about. Just
give me my walking papers,” Candi said the second she walked into
Monette’s office.

“We do exit interviews as part of the program
no matter why a participant leaves,” Kim explained. “Please sit
down.”

“So much for helping out your girl,” Candi
said to Monette. She walked over to the edge of Monette’s desk.

“You consistently violated program rules
despite being counseled. I documented the times I met with you,”
Kim continued in a calm tone.

“We talked to our supervisors. Far as they
know, our bosses haven’t fired us.” Candi continued to ignore
Kim.

“You will be. Those jobs were provided as
part of Opportunity Knocking. The only way they get the tax credits
is if you successfully complete the program,” Monette replied,
measuring out her words for emphasis.

“I quit a job cause you talked me into this,”
Candi yelled and pointed at Monette.

“You should have thought about that before
you started playin’ jailhouse games,” Monette said in a normal tone
of voice. She glanced at Kim. “You can go now. I’ll take it from
here.”

Kim glanced at Candi, then at Monette. “Uh,
maybe I better stay just in case.”

“It’s okay. Really.” Monette stood and walked
around her desk. She nodded to Kim that she should leave. Once the
door closed, she put both fists on her hips. “What the hell did you
expect to happen, Candi? And don’t give me that poor pitiful me
routine.”

“What are you talkin’ ’bout?” Candi crossed
her arms.“Blaming me for your screw-up, that’s what I’m talking
about. All this whining about how all I think about is myself.
Bull. If you think I’m going to go back to where I came from for
you, forget it. I’ve got enough battles to fight. I’m not taking
you on as a project, too. Decide if you want to make it out here or
not. You’re grown, act like it.” Monette jabbed a finger into
Candi’s chest to drive home her point.

Candi breathed hard as she stared back at
Monette. Fire flashed in her ebony eyes for a few seconds, and then
died down. She brushed Monette’s hand away. “Fine. Do what you
gotta do.”

“Here.” Monette handed her the termination
letter.Candi scanned the letter and tossed it on the floor.
“Whatever.”

Monette watched her stomp out of the office.
Instead of feeling depressed, Monette felt numb. She wanted to help
Candi, but she wasn’t prepared to go down with her. Candi had
demanded street loyalty that Monette would not give. Instead she
would concentrate on helping women like Tyeisha and Lenore, those
really trying to grab a better life. Still, she had to wonder about
Candi’s next move.

***

Later at the halfway house the other
residents filtered in from their jobs. Monette listened as they
talked about plans for the weekend. Monette wished she had a reason
to feel such anticipation. She went outside to sit on the porch
once she saw no one else was there. Jayson pulled up in his Jeep.
As usual, he looked handsome even in his work clothes. Dark
sunglasses made him even sexier.

“TGIF,” he called out as she walked toward
him.

“I agree. What’s up?” Monette squinted into
the late afternoon sunshine.

“Thought I’d make celebrating Friday a
regular thing,” Jayson answered with a smile.

“I’m swamped with stuff to do.” Monette
lifted a shoulder.

“If I didn’t know better, I would say you’re
trying to dump me,” Jayson joked. “I can tell you had a rough
day.”

“You could say that, yeah.” Monette gave a
sharp, bitter laugh.

“Even more reason to spend quality time with
me. I can take you to a quiet spot for dinner. I have food already.
That way you can go home to write and I’ll get back to the garage
to finish up my day. Okay, this is where you say, ‘Good planning.’
” Jayson opened the door for her.

“Good planning,” Monette echoed. She gave him
a tired smile.

“Your limo, ma’am. I’m a player, right?”
Jayson patted the passenger seat and gestured for her to get
in.

“Not even. And don’t change. I’ll let them
know and be right back.”

Monette went inside to sign out before
leaving. As she went upstairs to get her purse, she passed Candi
and Yarva. Candi didn’t look at her. Yarva gazed at her with
contempt, seemed about to say something, and then kept walking
instead. When Monette went back outside, she got into the Jeep
feeling down.

Jayson drove them downtown to Capital Lake.
Monette put on her sunglasses, grateful for something to hide
behind. He found a shady spot beneath a huge oak tree on the bank.
Stone benches had been placed at intervals. A breeze made the
late-spring, sunny day pleasant. He carried their lunch and wiped
the seat for Monette.

“I have two wonderful seafood plates from
Miss Lu- Lu’s café. Your favorite strawberry soda, and for dessert,
homemade banana pudding.” Jayson pulled items from a large
insulated bag.

“You thought of everything.” Monette gazed at
him. She was touched by how sweet he was to her. Tears formed in
her eyes. She sniffed.

“Hey, you definitely had a bad day.” Jayson
put the bag down on the grass. “Tell me what happened.”

Monette pulled herself back together quickly.
She used a napkin he handed her to blot her eyes. She readjusted
her sunglasses and smiled. “Same old story. Too much to do in too
little time.”

“That’s a fake cheerful voice if I ever heard
one.” Jayson tried to take off her sunglasses.

She batted his hand away playfully. “Will you
stop? All this pollen just got to me is all.”

“You never complained about allergies
before.” Jayson took off his sunglasses to really scrutinize
her.

“Pollen must be worse today, I guess.”
Monette reached into the bag and got a plastic bottle of soda. “A
cool drink would be just right.”

“I want you to tell me if anything serious is
bothering you, Monette,” Jayson said in a serious tone.

“Okay, I’m really hungry. So less talking and
more eating.” Monette picked up a bag and handed it to him.

Jayson laughed. “Good idea. My stomach will
start making loud noises in a minute.”

Monette continued to simulate cheerful talk.
Jayson glanced at her a few times when she got too quiet. She
decided to finish her food quickly. Keeping up the act was a
strain. After a few minutes, Monette closed the plastic container
with her food. She’d only eaten half of the meal.

“You didn’t eat very much.” Jayson pointed to
the box.

“I’ll save the rest for later. That po’boy is
huge. I’m full, though.” Monette patted her stomach.

“You’re going to be hungry later, I bet.
Anyway, I thought we could take in a movie and then—”

“I’m not sure about tonight. I’ve got so much
to do.” Monette brushed crumbs from her lap. She packed the
insulated bag, and then looked out over the lake. “Nice view.”

“Hey, we always kick off the weekend
together. Work a little harder tomorrow. That way we can play later
tonight.” Jayson straddled the bench and put both arms around
Monette.

“Nah. Besides, I’m tired already. By the time
I finish writing and doing chores, I’ll be no good to you.” Monette
looked at her wristwatch.

“Then you rest up and we’ll make it a
Saturday celebration instead.” Jayson leaned forward to kiss
her.

“Let’s not.” Monette moved her head away. She
steeled herself to finally do what was best for him. “Things are
pretty bad for me right now, and I don’t want to bring you into it.
Taking a break wouldn’t be a bad idea.”

“What?” Jayson blinked at her as though she’d
just slapped him. “Out of the blue. Just like that, let’s take a
break.”

“I’m not gonna be pardoned, Jayson. That
means on paper I’m a convicted felon. If Winn Barron has his way,
my parole could be revoked any day. With all that coming at me, I
just need breathing room.” Monette pushed away his attempt to
embrace her.

“Now is the time when we should be even
closer, honey. You think I’ll run because you’re going through
something? No way.” He reached for her hand, but Monette moved
further away from him.

“Right, you’re going to visit me in prison.
You gonna bring Lenae, too? I’ll bet her mommy and grandparents
will just love that,” Monette said harshly. When Jayson winced as
though seeing that image, she nodded slowly. “Yeah, now you’re
getting it. Think about it some more and you’ll see I’m right.
Let’s just go.”

“There’s a better way to handle this,
Monette,” Jayson called after her as Monette went to the Jeep. Then
he followed her. “Don’t play that tough loner act with me. I know
better.”

“No, you don’t. That’s the whole point. Just
take me back to the house, okay?”

Monette got in and hugged the passenger door
to be as far away from Jayson as possible. He seemed at a loss for
words during the short ride back to New Beginnings. Jayson looked
at her from time to time. Monette stared straight ahead, but she
was aware of his every gesture, every false start to talk. She
ached to take comfort in his arms, but she resisted being selfish.
When he pulled into the driveway at the halfway house, Monette
jumped out just as the Jeep stopped moving.

Monette drew up the courage to look at him.
Her resolve almost crumbled when he took off his sunglasses. His
eyes, rich and brown, peered right into her heart. She was sure he
could see she wanted to stay by his side.

“Thanks for everything,” Monette said in what
she hoped was a cool tone. She waved at him and turned to go
inside.

“You don’t have to do this,” Jayson called
out. “Don’t do this.”

She kept walking with her head up. "Tyeisha
and Lenore sat on the porch in the cypress swing, chatting. They
stopped talking when Monette approached. The sound of the Jeep’s
engine as Jayson drove off nearly did her in, but Monette managed
to hold it together.

“Hey, Monette. If we can help—,” Tyeisha
started.

Monette merely waved them away and kept
going. She made it to her bedroom before the tears came again.

***

Saturday Monette had another resident tell
Jayson she wasn’t feeling good. Sunday he called four times, twice
before church and twice before he went to Sunday dinner with his
family. She had Lenore answer her calls. Afraid she might give in
herself, Monette begged Lenore to keep giving excuses.

Later Monette spent hours walking downtown on
the riverfront. She had endured all she could of Yarva’s smirks. In
spite of the hot sunshine, Monette lingered on the stone pathway
atop the levee looking across the wide river. Trees swayed in a hot
wind on the west bank of the Mississippi. After a while she walked
back downtown. A restaurant on Third Street served food at sidewalk
tables. Monette ordered a glass of lemonade after she sat down.
When Candi came around the comer, Monette doubted it was a
coincidence.

“Hey.” Candi stood over her.

“Hey.” Monette watched people go by.

“Can I sit down?”

“Help yourself.” Monette continued to people
watch.

“I heard about the pardon and everything.
Sorry.” Candi fiddled with the plastic salt shaker on the
table.

“Hmm.”

“Look, about that job, maybe you were right.”
Candi put the white plastic bottle down, then picked it up
again.

“That’s your idea of an apology.” Monette
looked at her.

“Hey, you acted all uppity. At least Yarva
didn’t make me feel like some underachiever,” Candi blurted
out.

“Great. You can be nothing together. Just
don’t try to make me feel guilty,” Monette shot back. When the
waitress brought out the glass, Monette tossed a couple of dollar
bills down on the table. “You can have it. I need more fresh
air.”

She walked back to the halfway house alone.
Her mother was on the front porch when she got there. Monette
heaved a sigh of resignation as she got closer. She should have
known that once the money stopped flowing, one of her relatives
would show up. A man waited in an old Cadillac parked on the
street.

“Hey, girl. I tried to call you, but
DeWayne’s cell phone kept losing the signal. That’s DeWayne. Wave
to him.”

Monette obeyed. The man grinned and waved
back. “Nice to meet you, DeWayne. Sort of,” Monette mumbled.

“How ya doin’? Listen, I’m not gonna be in
your way long, sweetie. ’Sides, DeWayne doesn’t stay out too late.”
Annabelle frowned behind her fake tortoiseshell sunglasses.

“It’s only four in the afternoon.” Monette
sat in the wooden swing.

Annabelle sat next to her. “Yeah, well the
man is close to sixty-five.”

“Kinda old for you. I mean, you usually like
them younger,” Monette deadpanned.

“These young men expect you to be their sugar
mama. I’m not spending what little money I have on some guy.”
Annabelle snorted to show what she thought of that idea.

“Right.”

“I’m struggling as it is. Rita ain’t no help.
Don’t get me started on your brothers.” Annabelle rolled her
eyes.

“I won’t,” Monette replied. She crossed her
arms, waiting for the pitch.

“Anyway, I hate to ask, but could you let me
hold a couple of bills. Two months, three at most.” Annabelle gave
Monette’s arm a tap. “You know how it is.”