Starting Over (7 page)

His eyes traced
her lips before he tore his gaze back to her eyes again. “You gave
yourself to me last night. Not just your body, your heart too. You
were all in, so don’t even try to deny it.”

“I was
grieving.” He didn’t seem willing to accept that response. “I was
still in shock.”

“You needed
me.
Not just some warm body to help you forget your grief
for a while. You needed me. Your husband. Your lover. Your best
friend.”

Eve was stunned
by the conviction in his voice. How could she argue with a man who
seemed so certain he was right when she wasn’t so sure he was
wrong? Last night, Alex had made her believe life could go on and
she would find happiness again. No one else could have done that.
“I want you to leave.” She prayed he wouldn’t argue with her. “I
have to plan Aunt Sharon’s funeral, and I can’t do that if I have
to worry about us. Please just let me do this alone.”

He looked torn,
but he finally pulled back. “Fine, but this isn’t over, Eve. Not
even close.”

Eve waited until she
heard Alex rental car’s engine start before she gave in to the
tears. She felt as if her heart was shattering. She’d lost the two
most important people in her life in twenty-four hours, and she had
to figure out how to rebuild her life without them.

Dan’s boots
fell heavily on the old pine floorboards. Eve didn’t have to look
up to know he was standing in the office. He was the only person
she could still count on, yet leaning on him felt like a betrayal
to the man who owned her heart.

“He’s gone?”
Dan asked. His large, work-roughened hand moved over her hair,
soothing her as one might soothe a distraught child.

She was tempted
to turn into his touch. She wasn’t attracted to him, but she valued
his friendship, especially since the people she’d thought of as
friends back in the city had proven to her that being out of sight
meant she was out of their minds. The only friends she had were the
ones surrounding her, and Dan seemed the best among them. She
sniffled, trying to pull herself together. She didn’t want Dan’s
pity. She wanted him to see her as the strong and capable woman she
was before she lost her identity being the wife of the steel mogul.
“He’s gone.”

“I know this
isn’t easy for you.” Dan pulled up a chair beside her. He held her
chin and forced her to look him in the eye. “Your life is here,
with us. This is where you belong, Evie. Sharon knew that, and so
do I.”

“She left me
the inn.”

“I know. She
told me.”

Gripping his
wrist, Eve pulled his hand away from her face. “When?”

“When she got
the news from the doctor.” He sighed and pushed his chair back to
give her a little breathing room. “I guess I was the first person
she told about the cancer.”

It hurt to know
Sharon hadn’t shared that news with her first, but Eve understood.
Dan was a part of her day-to-day life, and her niece wasn’t. “Why
didn’t you tell me about her plans?”

“It wasn’t my
place.”

Dan was a man
of integrity. If Sharon had asked him to keep a secret, Eve knew he
would take it to his grave. “She wants me to proceed with the
renovations.”

“I know.” Dan
crossed one booted foot over his knee and folded his arms. “The
expansion was important to her. Sharon wanted to see this project
through. She thought she would have more time…”

Eve understood
of how precious time was, and she knew she would never again take
another day for granted. She ran her fingertip over a shallow
scratch in the desk’s smooth surface. “I know. It seems like kind
of a departure, don’t you think?”

The Lakeside
Inn had always catered to families. Sharon’s expansion would turn
it into more of a retreat, with a spa, yoga, meditation, a
waterfall, and spectacular flower gardens. She even wanted to
switch to an organic menu.

“I think Sharon
realized a lot of things toward the end.”

“Such as?”

“She worked
hard all of her life. She did what she loved, but she gave so much
to her career and everyone else, and she rarely took time for
herself.”

“What do you
mean?” Eve knew her aunt was a hard-working woman. In fact, Eve had
often chastised her for not taking better care of herself. Sharon
always assured her she liked to keep busy.

“She had her
work, this inn, plus her work as the mayor for years. Even after
that, she chaired so many of the events around town.”

“You mean like
the book drive to raise funds for the library?”

“That, and the
children’s toy drive at Christmas.” Dan smiled. “Not to mention her
work with the Horticultural Society and the church. Oh, and the
food bank they were trying to raise funds for. Sharon may not have
officially been running this town anymore, but she still loved the
people and wanted to do everything she could to make their lives
better.”

Sharon had
always felt that way. The dozens of people who’d passed through her
home mourning her were a testament to the fact that her efforts
hadn’t gone unnoticed. “I know,” Eve said. Eve recalled all of the
benefits she’d attended with her aunt. Sharon got so much joy out
of giving, never expecting anything in return. As a teen, Eve
wanted to be just like her. Somehow, she had gotten wrapped up in a
meaningless life of society lunches after she married Alex. Her
work as a freelance editor was set aside, and with that, she lost
her sense of self.

“It sounds like
you’re going to have a lot on your plate over the next little
while,” Dan said. “Sharon left big shoes to fill.”

“She sure did,”
Eve said, wondering again whether she was up to the task.

“Think you’re
up to it?” Eve didn’t respond. “Just know that I’ll be here to help
you. Whatever you need.”

“Thanks.” She
had to tackle the challenge herself, but knowing she had his
support if she needed it helped.

“What does this
mean for your marriage, Eve?”

That was the
last thing she wanted to talk about, but she knew everyone would
wonder when she announced her plan to stay and run the inn. Dan
deserved to be the first to know. “It’s over.”

“I’m sorry,” he
said, lowering his head.

“Are you?”

“No.”

They looked at
each other a long time before Eve said, “Our friendship means the
world to me, but if you think my divorce means you and I have a
chance at a future together, we don’t.” She didn’t want to be so
blunt, but she thought it was best to be honest with him.

“You may feel
that way now—”

“I’m not going
to change my mind, Dan.” She reached for his hand and curled her
fingers around his. “I love you as a friend, but that’s all it will
ever be. If you can’t live with that, maybe you should think about
moving on.” Adding Dan to the list of people she’d lost would
destroy her, but she was determined to do what she had to do to
create the life
she
wanted for herself.

“You really
mean that?” He held her hand tighter, obviously trying to hold on
to something he felt was slipping away.

Eve knew what
that felt like. She’d done the same thing with Alex. “I don’t want
you to go, but if you have to, I’ll understand. I won’t hold it
against you.”

“I don’t want
to go anywhere. This is my home.”

“Good, I want
you to stay. But I need you to understand—”

“I do,” he
said, leaning in to kiss her cheek. “But you need to understand
that you’re not an easy woman to fall out of love with, Evie.”
Pushing his chair back, he stood. “Just ask your soon-to-be
ex-husband. That might be the only thing we’ll ever agree
about.”

***

Several days
later, Eve was sitting at her aunt’s desk when the phone rang. She
recognized the number. She had been half-expecting that call given
the steps she’d taken earlier that day. “Hi, James. How are you?”
James and his wife, Ani, were her husband’s best friends and two of
her favorite people, but she knew it wasn’t a social call.

“I should be
asking you that. I was so sorry to hear about your aunt’s passing.
How’re you holding up?”

“I’m hanging in
there.” She’d been so busy she’d barely had time to mourn, which
she suspected was the way her aunt wanted it. Sharon’s service was
scheduled for the following day, and she still had a million things
left to do. With so many people coming in from out of town to pay
their respects, their inn and every hotel, motel, and resort in the
area was booked. “Keeping busy. How about you?”

“I didn’t call
to make small talk.”

“I know,” she
said, sighing. She’d asked Morris to call James before serving Alex
the divorce papers. James had been Alex’s attorney ever since he
graduated law school, so she knew he would handle their divorce on
Alex’s behalf. “I’m sorry if the call blindsided you, James. I
would have called you myself, but…”

“It’s okay. I
understand, but Jesus, Eve, are you sure this is what you
want?”

She’d been
asking herself that question all morning. She’d been making herself
crazy since Alex left, wondering what he was thinking, how he was
feeling, why he hadn’t called or reached out to her. That made her
realize she was falling right back into the same hell she’d been
living in for months, and she didn’t want to go there again. She
had no choice but to sever ties once and for all. “This is the way
it has to be.”

“I know he
still loves you. Maybe you guys could go into counseling or—”

“I know you’re
trying to help, but it’s too late to go back. I’m ready to move on,
and I’d consider it a huge favor if you would try to convince Alex
to let me do that.”

James laughed.
“You’re kidding, right? You really think he’ll listen to me on
this?”

“Will you at
least try?” she asked. If her husband would listen to anyone, it
would be his best friend. “I don’t want this to drag on any longer
than it has to. I care about Alex, and the last thing I want is to
see him get hurt by trying to hold on to a marriage that’s been
over for a long time.”

“This makes me
so sad,” James said quietly. “We’ve known you guys since the
beginning. You were so happy then. I really thought you were the
perfect woman for him.”

“So did I,” Eve
said, letting her eyes travel to the framed wedding photo. “But
people change. He’s not the same person he was back then, and
neither am I. We want different things out of life. It
happens.”

“Just know that
Ani and I will always be here for you, okay? No matter what
happens, we’re still your friends and we love you.”

“Thanks, I love
you guys too.”

“We’d love to
get out there for your aunt’s service tomorrow, but Jade is sick,
and we don’t want to leave her.”

“Oh, I hope
it’s nothing serious.” Eve often babysat for James and Ani when
Alex was working late. She adored their two children.

“No, we think
it’s just a stomach bug, but we’re taking her to the doctor
tomorrow, just to be sure.”

“Give her a big
hug for me and tell her I hope she’s feeling better soon.”
Realizing she wouldn’t ever hug Jade again made her sad. As much as
she loved Ani and James, they were Alex’s friends. They represented
a part of the life she was determined to leave behind.

“Will do.”

Eve knew she
should let him go, but she wanted to know how Alex was faring. If
anyone would know, James would. “How did you know my aunt’s service
is tomorrow? Did Alex tell you?”

“Morris told me
when he called. I didn’t even know she’d passed.”

“You haven’t
spoken to Alex then?”

“Last I heard,
he was headed out to see you. I assumed he was still there.”

“He doesn’t
know about Morris’s call?” Eve knew that conversation wouldn’t go
well, unless Alex had changed his mind and decided to let her
go.

“No, I’m going
to see him now.”

“Okay, well
good luck with that.”

“Thanks, I have
a feeling I’m going to need it.”

***

Alex looked up
from his computer when James walked into his office. “You could’ve
knocked.”

“Your
receptionist said you were alone.” James claimed the seat across
from him. “How’ve you been, man?”

“Okay… busy.”
He could tell James was expecting more of an explanation. “Sorry I
haven’t touched base in a while. I’ve had a lot going on.”

“I know. That’s
what I came to talk to you about. Why didn’t you tell me you were
getting a divorce?”

Alex’s mouth
went dry. He’d been torturing himself with thoughts of a legal
separation, believing that might be Eve’s next step, but he’d never
allowed himself to consider the D word. That was too permanent.
Their problems were just temporary; they would work them out. They
had
to work them out. “What the hell are you talking
about?”

“Eve’s lawyer
called me this morning.”

“I can’t
believe she’s moving so fast.” Alex closed his eyes and tipped his
head back, wishing he could wake up from that nightmare.

“My guess is
it’s been in the works a while.”

“I guess she
can’t wait to be rid of me.” He’d thought dislocating his shoulder
playing baseball was the height of discomfort, but that was nothing
compared to the pain James’s news caused.

“Why didn’t you
tell me?” James asked. They’d been friends since college, and no
one, other than Eve, knew Alex better than James.

“I guess I was
in denial. I really thought she’d come home after…” He didn’t want
to sound callous, but they all knew Sharon’s illness was fatal.
Alex believed when her aunt passed, his wife would return home.
Then they could focus on their marriage and the family she was so
eager to start. He’d never imagined they would grow so far apart in
a few months.