Sticks and Stones (21 page)

Wrestling a rabid badger

‘So when are you back to work Sands?’ Miles said as he strolled about her room, picking up get well cards at random and shamelessly reading all the messages, most of which made him roll his eyes and mutter, ‘Over sentimental drivel’.

‘Miles,’ Rosie snapped, stopping him in his tracks. ‘She’s only just leaving hospital today you lunatic. She won’t be able to come back for ages.’

‘Pussy,’ Miles muttered under his breath. ‘Ow!’ Miles exclaimed after receiving a swift kick to his shin. ‘Are you insane woman? Stop physically assaulting me. Don’t you think Lou’s seen enough violence recently?’ Rosie’s face paled.

‘Oh God, sorry Lou,’ she whispered.

Lou shook her head at Rosie, taking in Miles’ smug expression. ‘I don’t consider physically reprimanding Miles as violence Rosie. After all you can’t train a puppy without a few bops to the nose.’

‘He’s learning but I sometimes despair at how thoughtless he is. There’s no filter between brain and mouth,’ Rosie replied.

‘”
Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity”,’ Ash put in.

‘Hey!’ Miles objected. ‘I am standing right here you know.’

‘How come they let you all in?’ Lou asked, completely ignoring Miles. ‘The ward sister is normally a Nazi about the whole two-at-a-time thing.

‘Oh she
knows
Miles,’ Rosie explained. ‘I’m more like a dog for the disabled when it comes to him, and therefore don’t count as an extra person.’

Lou laughed along with everyone apart from Miles, and was thankful that she could now do this without the tearing pain in her abdomen.

‘What’s his disability?’ she asked through her laughter.

‘Oh he has a very serious condition,’ Rosie replied, her attempt at a somber expression slightly marred by the fact her eyes were dancing. ‘It’s called “Arsehole Syndrome”. It’s really quite limiting; it gives him this compulsion to be as objectionable as possible to everyone he comes across. Dreadful morbidity and mortality figures I’m afraid. You see, it won’t be long before he pisses off the wrong person.’

‘Again, I am standing right here you bastards.’

‘Have patience my annoying friend,’ Ash clapped Miles on the back, causing him to go forward a step. ‘”
Respect comes like a turtle and goes away like a gazelle”.’

‘I’m annoying? At least I don’t speak in riddles.’ Miles’ face was turning an alarming shade of purple whilst the rest of the room were barely suppressing their laughter. Just as Lou thought he might really lose it the door to her room opened. Glancing at her watch she realized that Frankie must have arrived to take her home. She turned away to get out of bed on the other side so she could start gathering some of her things.

Three days ago, just after her PCA had just been taken down, Yanna, a Filipino nurse on the ward, had bustled into her room and declared that she was there to ‘sort her out’. Lou wasn’t entirely sure she liked the sound of that, but her objections were ignored, as she was encouraged up and out of the bed. Yanna walked her to the bathroom with Lou stumbling like she was a newborn colt and then was horrified when the nurse came in with her. The next ten minutes were a blur. Before she knew it, and with ruthless efficiency, she was sitting up in her bed, washed from head to foot, and in her own pyjamas and dressing gown. It was amazing to be clean again and in actual clothes. She felt a weird mixture of better than she had since she’d been admitted, and vaguely like she had been assaulted. She’d tried to stammer her thanks but Yanna had waved away any gratitude.

‘Is my job, no need to thank me. I only glad your young man brought a dressing gown. You give everyone heart attack with these ones,’ she said, pointing at Lou’s cleavage showing above her tiny camisole. ‘Need more material lady.’ Lou flushed and smiled at Yanna. She knew it was pointless to argue that an imminent hospital stay wasn’t exactly the scenario she had purchased her nightwear for, and that the set she was currently wearing was in fact her most demure.

Since then, and with the fabulous Yanna’s help (despite her increasingly horrified reactions to Lou’s choice of pyjamas), Lou had gone from strength to strength. But she was still a bit unsteady, she still had a fair amount of pain, and, even with Yanna’s warnings, she still wasn’t taking things as slowly as she should. So when she hurried to get out of bed she experienced a massive head rush and felt her vision narrow, her hand gripping onto the side table to steady herself. Just as she was about to go down she felt strong hands wrapped around her upper arms and was manoeuvered back onto the bed. When her vision cleared she saw Dylan’s gorgeous face hovering above hers.

‘Babes,’ he breathed. ‘Take it easy okay? I don’t want you passing out on me before I’ve even got you off the ward.’

‘But…but Frankie’s coming in to get me. She – ‘

‘Well here’s the thing, see,’ Dylan said, leaning back from her and avoiding her eyes as his scanned her room for her bag. ‘Frankie’s only just started back at work and – ‘

‘But she’s not at work today. It’s Saturday and she’s not on call.’

‘She might not be but Tom is,’ Dylan said, still avoiding her eyes as he pushed past Ash to get to her bag in the corner. ‘Katie and Sarah were too busy to take Lucy so…’ he trailed off as he started hefting her bag across to her small side table and, to her horror, started emptying her toiletries (including her freaking tampons) into her bag then zipping it up.

‘That’s fine, if she can’t take me then I’m sure that somebody else would do it.’ She looked towards the others, but weirdly they all seemed to be avoiding her gaze as well.

‘I guess I cou – ‘ Miles was cut off by what looked like another kick in the shin from Rosie, and Lou noticed Dylan shooting him a filthy look. What on earth was going on? Even Ash was looking distinctly
shady.

‘I have to leave now Louise,’ he said, moving forward and bending to kiss her cheek. When he straightened he went on to say, ‘I’m sorry but “What is written on the brow will inevitably be seen by the eye”, so you will understand in time.’

‘What are you on about?’ she semi-shouted as much as her still hoarse voice could manage. ‘Hey!’ she continued as she noticed they were all now shooting her apologetic looks and edging towards the door.

‘Bye sweetie,’ Rosie said giving her a small wave and still avoiding direct eye contact. Miles looked mildly confused as she ushered him out.

‘Thanks for nothing guys!’ Lou shouted after them then glared at Dylan, who looked remarkably unconcerned by her reaction.

‘I think we’re done,’ he told her after sweeping a whole mess of her stuff off the top of her dresser into her bag with a complete disregard to what any of it actually was. ‘Oh, I almost forgot.’ He dropped her bag heavily on the floor and grabbed a small pile of stuff he had left on the chair. ‘Turns out you don’t own any loose casual-wear; not that I’m particularly surprised.’ He smirked at her and threw a ratty t-shirt and tracksuit bottoms into her lap, which she immediately recognized as his.

‘What’s this?’ she asked.

‘It’s a t-shirt and some tracky-bums,’ he said slowly, as if she was mentally deficient.

She glared at him. ‘What is it doing on my bed?’

‘Put it on.’

Lou made a disgusted face and threw the clothes back into Dylan’s face. ‘No way. I’ll wear some of my own clothes.’

‘Okay babes,’ Dylan said, still smirking. ‘Your most casual outfit is your gym kit. Fancy trying to get that lot on over your dressings?’ 

Lou bit her lip. The thought of trying to force her beaten body into the sparse amount of spandex her gym outfit consisted of was frankly terrifying. The irony was that there was a time she would have killed to wear Dylan’s t-shirt. She used to watch his one-night-stands proudly strut about in just his t-shirts, whilst fighting that awful churning jealously that felt as though it was eating her from the inside out.

She was still clutching the t-shirt, biting her lip when Yanna breezed into the room. ‘Ah, good: you here,’ she said as she bustled in, smiling brightly at Dylan and then turning to Lou. ‘Your nice young man here to take you now.’

‘I am not going anywhere with him,’ Lou spat out, collapsing back into the bed and pressing the heels of her hands into her eye sockets.

‘Now, now,’ Yanna chided, moving forward and pulling Lou’s arms down from her face. ‘You are crazy girl. Lovely, big, beautiful boy say he want to take you home, you go with him.’

Lou growled in frustration as Yanna gently manoeuvered her to the edge of the bed. ‘Ah!’ she exclaimed as she snatched up the t-shirt. ‘I prayed for more modest clothes for you. Praise the lord my prayers answered and you not walking out looking like slut.’  

Yanna started tugging off Lou’s robe but Lou squeaked in protest. ‘I’m not getting changed with him in here,’ she said, crossing her arms across her chest.

‘Good for you,’ Yanna said, then started shooing Dylan out of the room. ‘No boobies and foo-foos till after wedding-ring on that finger.’

Once Lou was dressed in Dylan’s clothes, a delighted Yanna called Dylan back in and, to her complete shock, he produced her favourite pair of slippers then bent down to put them on her feet that were hanging off the side of the bed. Once shod, she gingerly climbed off the bed and Dylan moved in front of her.

‘Crickey Lou, I always forget how short you are without those stilts you a cavort about in,’ he said softly, then tucked her hair behind her ears, bent down to her upturned face and, very briefly, touched his lips to hers.

Lou blinked. What on earth was going on? After that she was so completely dazed that she barely noticed as he led her out of the ward, past all the ecstatic nurses at the ward desk (all of whom were totally besotted with Dylan and had wasted no opportunity to let her know how lucky they thought she was, repeatedly. The fact that he was not her boyfriend, and, to be quite honest, after all the crap he pulled, not even much of a friend, seemed to be irrelevant), down the corridor and out of the hospital. She knew she had to keep moving to help her recovery but that didn’t mean that each step wasn’t a struggle. By the time they reached the front entrance her mouth was tight with pain, and her faced had paled.

Dylan turned to her, took one look at her face and muttered, ‘Shit. I knew I should have got a wheelchair. It’s okay babes, the car is just over by there.’

‘Of course it is.’ Lou could feel her lips trying to tip up in a small smile when she saw Dylan’s car parked haphazardly just outside the main entrance. She had never before been so grateful about his arrogant, and frankly ridiculous, penchant for obnoxious parking. He moved to his car, ripped the ticket off the windshield, threw it in the gutter (his standard method for dealing with such things) and held open the door for her. She couldn’t help the wince of pain she made as she slid into the passenger seat, and noticed Dylan’s grip on her elbow tightened significantly when he heard it. Glancing up at him before he closed the door she could see his eyes flashing with anger and that muscle ticking in his jaw again. After he’d stowed her bag and got into the driver’s seat he was silent for a moment, his knuckles turning white where he was gripping the steering wheel.

‘Um…are you okay?’ Lou asked after the silence had gone on for a little longer than was comfortable.

‘If they didn’t have enough evidence to bury that prick alive I swear I would find a way to make him pay,’ Dylan said through gritted teeth.

‘What’s brought this on?’ Lou asked, her anger at Dylan essentially kidnapping her from the hospital forgotten in her bemusement.

‘What’s brought it on? What do you think’s brought it on? How about watching you shuffle through the hospital corridor, pain etched on your face? When the only type of walking I’ve ever seen you do before is full on strutting. How about you cringing just from getting into the sodding car? How about me not having to wrestle you out of that place to get you to come home with me because all the fight has been knocked out of you?’  

‘You wanted me to fight you?’ she asked.

‘Getting a normal, fully charged Louise Sands out of that hospital and into my car would have been like wrestling a rabid badger with the way you feel about me at the moment.’

‘And you would have preferred that?’

‘It would have been a pain in my arse babes, but I would have welcomed it just to see a glimpse of your crazy, stubborn, irrepressible lunatic self.’

Lou sighed and closed her eyes, sinking back into her chair. All her energy was concentrated on the pain in her abdomen and she didn’t have the reserve to deal with a weird-acting Dylan. ‘You’re the lunatic.’

‘Maybe,’ he muttered, starting the car.

Just before he pulled out of the space he leaned across, opened Lou’s palm and put two painkillers into it and a bottle of water into her other hand. The movement caused him to lean nearly all the way across her, and she opened her eyes when she felt how close he was.

‘We’ll get you back to being an annoying pain in my arse babes,’ he whispered. Then before she could say anything he brushed his lips against hers
again
and pulled back into the driver’s seat.

Lou glared across at him, her mouth set in a thin line. He wouldn’t be helping her get back to anything. She thought about throwing the water in his face but as the car jolted over a speed bump she decided to take the bloody tablets. He might have won this round, but if he thought a couple of stab wound would transform her into a complete pushover, he had another thing coming. She was still plotting her escape as the tablets started kicking in and the motion of the car started lulling her into unconsciousness. She would just shut her eyes for a moment…