Still Mine (18 page)

“Sex won’t fix it either.” She didn’t care for the note of disappointment in her voice.

“So says you, but I’m all for trying a few hundred more times before we give up on using wild, hot sex to bring us closer.”

He offered her a smirk before stroking the side of her face. Sensation rippled down her body, raising goose bumps. He trailed that hand across her lips, drawing a silent gasp from her. Her skin clamored for attention, begging to be in the path of that hand as it slid down her chin and along her neck.

“The attraction was always a key element between us, Jonnie.” He smoothed his fingers over her collarbones and her nipples ached for their turn. “You were the first woman I ever met who I wanted to hold. I enjoyed that as much as the fucking.”

She shivered as he touched the top of her breast, stroking over the tender swell while his words doused the flare of her temper. His voice was just too tender to ignore. It hit the spot in her heart that had been his since the night he’d stayed in her bed instead of storming out in a lust-inspired blaze of anger. His blunt language only seemed to make it more intimate. Maybe because he was actually using the word correctly. She’d heard it so often for the wrong reasons that fuck was suddenly rather erotic.

At least crossing Paul’s lips it was.

“I was stupid. Young and inexperienced enough to overlook how rare our connection was.” His gaze locked with hers as he bypassed her nipple, slipping his hand around her back and pulling her against his body. His opposite hand threaded through her hair, popping a few pins free as triumph filled his eyes.

“I’m happy to announce that I’ve learned from my misspent youth.” He pressed up against her, letting her feel the hard shape of his erection. “I’m repentant and eager to practice my spousal duties over and over until I perfect them.” His fingers massaged her head, sending a shower of delight across her skin. His voice dipped into a dark tone as his eyes flared with passion. “Until I please you.”

“It’s not that simple—”

His eyes flashed a warning at her. “Yes, it is.”

His kiss blocked out her response, covering her mouth and taking a deep taste. The tip of his tongue stroked across her lower lip before thrusting deep into her mouth to tangle with her own. The hand on her back slid down, curving around one side of her bottom, stroking and gripping her cheek, pressing her hips towards his body and the hard cock hidden inside his pants. Her clit throbbed as her passage ached for a taste of it, her memory reminding her just how good it had felt to have him inside her. Intimacy was so much better in reality than in her dreams.

He broke the kiss and she whimpered. Need clawed at her as she opened her eyes to stare into his. She needed to see him, needed to know it wasn’t a dream. Her fingers found his shoulders, digging into the hard ridges as she held onto him.

“But you’re right about the sex part of our relationship. It’s working great.”

“Arrogant bastard.”

He chuckled at her label. His hand stroked her bottom a few last times before he released her. He stepped back but captured one of her hands, raising it up to inspect her healing burns. The care was also tender and her eyes stung as she blinked to avoid letting tears escape.

“This is what I wanted to spare you from.” Anger coated his face as his gaze moved to her shoulder. He ran a hand across the area where the bullet had hit her, frowning at the bandaging he felt beneath her shirt. “The generals warned me that they’d go after you, hurt you, and I just couldn’t handle the idea of knowing your blood was being spilled because of me. I wasn’t worth that. You deserved better.”

His eyes flashed with pain so deep it horrified her. He cupped her chin, keeping their gazes locked. “They showed me pictures and videos that still makes me sick to think about. Real torture, Jo. It makes what you’re carrying around look like skinned knees.”

The look in his eyes carved a path through her heart. He wasn’t hiding behind his expressionless mask now. Deep pain stared back at her. She recognized it instantly, because it was a mirror image of the loneliness that inhabited her own soul.

A rap hit the door. The fingers holding her chin tightened a fraction before he released her. Taking a step back, he shot her a hard look. It was full of determination.

“I may be a jerk but never doubt that I loved you enough to try to protect you, Jo.”

He turned towards the door. “Enter.”

Two men moved through the doorway and immediately began a technical discussion she had trouble understanding. Paul didn’t. He absorbed the numbers like a sponge, his brain working far faster than hers ever did. His gaze moved with quick motions over the pages of reports they flipped through, but what astounded her was the way he recalled all of that hastily read material. Pulling numbers from one page while on other pages. It was humbling to witness but also amazing.

And there was no doubt in her mind that he wanted her to see it. An introduction of sorts, to the side of him that he’d always hidden from her. Just like those reports, he was recalling exactly what she’d charged him with before he walked out of her quarters. He was dropping the classified wall, including her in his world.

There was one difference though. Today she wasn’t mad. She watched him, until he looked up and locked their gazes. Hunger and need flared in his black eyes, so intense she would have sworn that she could feel the heat. The two scientists stopped talking and turned their heads to look at her. Paul raised one eyebrow.

“We’ll have to finish this discussion later, Jo.”

His voice was firm but lacked the arrogance that rubbed her temper. Moving towards the door, she halted with her hand on the knob. Turning her head, she found him watching her.

“Maybe.”

It was the sweetest word he’d ever heard. Ruby and her performance numbers evaporated out of his mind as Paul listened to the echo of Jo’s voice.

Maybe…

He was delirious and bursting with hope. A stupid grin lifted his lips as he felt his chest expand with a feeling that he didn’t recognize.

“Oh boy. There goes our timetable.” Chase McCann rolled his eyes as Paul shot him a warning glare. The man didn’t take the hint. “If it was just a case of stiff cock, fine, but that shit-eating grin is a whole lot worse.”

Jung Lee scoffed as the profanity hit his ears but he still smiled. “Pretty Lady has you on a leash. Good thing you’re married.” The Asian offered him a wide smile and a rare gleam of envy. “When did you get time to meet a pretty girl? I think maybe it’s my turn.”

Chase punched Jung in the shoulder as he scowled. “Once you tangle with a female that way, you’re screwed. You can’t concentrate on crap.” Chase announced his opinion and shook his head with pity.

“Possibly.” There was no question Jo was distracting. His cock was still hard, aching for a taste of her. But he wanted more this time, craved a deeper encounter than they’d shared before he’d had to leave. There wasn’t any logic to it, only the driving emotion that six years hadn’t extinguished.

The sex part was definitely working, but he really wanted to get back to making love.

Chapter Eight

Torture.

It was a hell of a word.

Jo felt the impact of that single idea for hours as she chewed on the second big word he’d fired at her—love.

Crap.

The water was getting hotter.

No one could stay mad forever and love had an amazing way of soothing slashes across the heart. She lingered in the shower, enjoying the warm water. When she did emerge from the stall, the mirror was coated in steam.

Grabbing a towel, she rubbed it through her hair. With the longer length, the strands were turning back into curls and she reached for a brush to head off a tangled mess.

Her new quarters had more than one window. It was practically the high life compared to the first room she’d slept in. There was an outer room and a back bedroom with an office nook built into one end. The bathroom was attached to the bedroom with no door. There were also windows in this bedroom. When the ones in the front were left open the evening breeze blew through to the bedroom. It carried the steam away, clearing the mirror before she got done drying off.

“Jesus Christ!” Her heart seized as she found Paul’s reflection staring back at her in the mirror. Her gaze flew to the vanity where she’d left her gun. She muffled a stronger word as a shudder shook her. Talk about being caught with your pants down. Nolan’s warning rang through her head as she recognized how vulnerable she’d left herself while showering. Her sidearm belonged on top of her towel, not ten paces from her hand.

Paul unfolded his arms and stepped all the way into the bathroom. His chest was bare, giving her an amazing view of his torso. Sculpted to perfection, it was any heterosexual girl’s dream. Dark hair ran over his pectorals and down in a triangle to where his waistband ended her viewing pleasure. His eyes were full of heat when she raised her gaze back to his face, a mocking eyebrow raised in response to her survey of his body.

He stepped closer, watching her as he decreased the distance between them. The way he moved was too sexy. It was another one of those details she’d failed to recall about him. The towel hung in front of her as she watched his gaze move over her, slowly devouring every inch.

“Do I want to know how you got in?”

A grin lifted his lips. “As your legal spouse, I asked for a key.” He stepped closer and excitement prickled across her skin, raising goose bumps. “Due to the fact that you haven’t filed any separation papers, my request was granted.”

He sounded surprised and she was slightly amazed that she hadn’t considered filing for divorce. Another long step and he reached out to cup her chin in his hand.

“Why didn’t you file, Jo? I left you alone for a week, plenty of time.”

She shifted backwards, unable to stay in place as her emotions got tangled up in the need licking across her body. “The paperwork would most likely have gotten lost in this post.”

He followed her, crowding her into the corner. Her heart rate increased, sending her lungs into a faster pace to keep up. Her senses filled with his scent. It triggered an overwhelming response from her body. Heat flowed through her like lava, coating every millimeter of skin and seeping into her passage. His hands flattened on the glass of the shower door, caging her, but excitement twisted through her, making it a welcome invasion of her space.

“Maybe. But that doesn’t change the fact that you didn’t even try.” He leaned closer and she felt his breath on her face. Behind the towel, her nipples tightened into hard points that protested the damp terrycloth on top of them. His eyes flickered with need, only this time he was enjoying the burn instead of rushing to tackle her. It drove the heat up another degree. She already knew that he could press his advantage and gain her surrender, but tonight he wanted to seduce her. A hard ripple of anticipation swept through her. Hot, hungry desire clawed at her. It wasn’t the promise of lust that captivated her, it was the idea of seduction. The tantalizing hint of being stroked by his hands until every nerve ending she owned transmitted mind-numbing pleasure.

“Drop the towel, Jo.” He placed a soft kiss on the side of her jaw. He was so close she could feel his body heat. Angling his head, he whispered against her ear, “I’m sick of surviving on memories.”

So was she.

Temptation raced through her as her fingers trembled. A tiny bite nicked her ear and she jumped as sensation flooded her, washing through her like a wave. Her hands opened and the towel fluttered over her curves to puddle around her ankles.

“So much better.” His voice brushed across her ear as she leaned against the glass. He used one foot to kick the towel across the tile floor. With it gone, he moved up close, his boots a single inch from her bare feet. She felt so exposed but it fueled the anticipation building inside her. Every inch of her skin eagerly waited to be touched.

“So much more to my liking, really. I’ve always been more of a hands-on scientist, Jo. Living in my thoughts isn’t enough. I need to touch the components.”

His husky words held her attention, his hand moving from the glass shower door to her neck and through the strands of her hair to grip it. He tilted her face up and she lifted her eyelids to lock stares with him. Passion flickered in the dark orbs as his opposite hand stroked down her neck.

“I enjoy the texture of your skin, the way it feels against my fingertips.” He continued down, over her collarbone, moving closer to her breast.

“Should I touch that puckered nipple? Or just stroke around it?”

She jerked but he held her in place as his fingers hesitated right above her nipple. The hard tip begged for a touch, craving more stimulation. A tiny moan escaped her lips as he held still, watching her with blazing eyes.

He laughed softy. “I’ve thought about you so many nights. About this, that impossible chance to actually touch you once again. Now that it’s here, I want to linger over every stroke, draw out each contact just because I’m so damn scared of waking up alone.”

“I know what you mean.” She lifted her hands and placed them on his chest. His breath rasped against his clenched teeth as she slid her hands over the hard surface of his chest. She found his flat, male nipples and teased them. A tic jerked on the side of his face as his eyes closed and his chest rumbled with a low growl.

“That’s right, touch me.” His voice was husky with hunger.

He arched slightly away from her, giving her better access to his torso. Pure enjoyment covered his features, fascinating her. He needed her touch as much as she craved his. The word “intimate” rose in her thoughts and it deepened the moment in a manner that was almost indescribable. They were two sides of a frame, useless without the other. Broken without the missing side.

“Touch me, Jo.”

He’d never begged her before. Paul had always taken, seducing her with his experience. His chest shuddered as she trailed her fingers through the crisp hair covering him. Confidence swelled up inside her as she listened to the hollow rattle of his breath moving through his gritted teeth.