Stink and the Freaky Frog Freakout (Book #8) (6 page)

“Kids,” said Mom. “Let’s keep our tongues in our mouths at the table.”

At 9:26, Stink put his bowl in the sink. He leapfrogged around the kitchen.

“Can I play outside?” he asked Mom.

“It’s pouring rain,” said Judy. “You hate the rain.”

“Nah-uh. I’m just going to splash in mud puddles,” said Stink.

“Wear your boots!” Mom called.

At 9:43, Stink developed a new interest in mud. He also had a new fascination with worms.
Shazam! He was getting froggier by the second!

Stink went on a worm hunt. He held worm races. He conducted the First Annual Great Backyard Earthworm Count. He even wondered what it would be like to eat a squirmy worm.

Stink was building a worm condo when Mom called him inside.

“What were you doing out in the rain all this time?” asked Judy.

“Worm stuff,” said Stink.

“You hate worms,” said Judy.

“Not.”

“Since when?” Judy asked. “And don’t say eight thirty-one this morning.”

“Actually, it was more like nine forty-three this morning,” said Stink.

Judy looked at him strangely. She tilted her head sideways.

“Is it time for swim lessons yet?” Stink asked.

“No swim lessons today, Stink.”

“But it’s Saturday!” said Stink.

“The pool’s closed for — Hey, wait just a sneaky-shark second. You hate swim lessons.”

“You’re cuckoo,” said Stink. “Never mind. I know something else I can do.”

Stink raced upstairs. He put on his swim fins. He put on his wet suit. He flop-flop-flopped down the stairs. He flop-flop-flopped into the kitchen. He flip-flopped over to the kitchen sink.

Stink filled the sink with water. He put on his swim goggles. He stuck his face in the sink. He blew bubbles!

Stink put on his snorkel next and lowered his head to the water again.

Judy came into the kitchen. “What are you doing?”

“Blub, blub, blub,” Stink gurgled.

“Mom!” Judy called. “Stink’s swimming in the kitchen sink!”

Today, the sink. Tomorrow, the pool!
There was no stopping him now.

Mom rushed into the kitchen. “Stink?” she asked. “What’s going on here?”

“Practice. Swimming,” Stink said around the mouthpiece. “I can’t be a Polliwog forever.”

Mom put her hands on her hips. Mom looked like she didn’t know what to say.

Dad came into the kitchen. “What’s going on?” he asked.

“Can’t anybody tell I’m swimming?” asked Stink.

“Stink’s swimming in the sink!” said Judy.

“Any chance you can save swim practice for the pool?” Dad asked. “I have to do the dishes anyway.”

“Fine.” Stink stopped swimming. He took off his snorkel. He took off his goggles. He let the water drain out of the sink. He poli-wiggled out of his wetsuit. He poli-woggled out of his swim fins.

“Hey, Dad, can I sleep in the basement tonight?” Stink asked.

“It’s too damp down there,” said Dad.

“And cold,” said Mom.

“And don’t forget spiders,” said Judy. “You hate spiders. And basements.”

Stink did hate the basement. But that was before. “Stop saying I hate stuff.”

“The facts, Stink.” Judy ticked off on her fingers. “First raisins. Then rain. Then worms. Then swimming in the sink. Now you want to sleep in the creepy, cold basement? What’s with you?”

“None of your big-sister beeswax,” said Stink. “It’s a secret.”

Peter Parker picked a peck of pickled peepers! Stink
was
turning into an F-R-O-G frog! For real! No lie. Even Judy saw it, too.

“Never mind. I’ll sleep in my own bed,” said Stink. “But I can still go swimming in the
upstairs
sink.” He grabbed his wetsuit, snorkel, mask, and fins.

Judy walked up the stairs backwards, giving Stink the stink eye.

“Spiders don’t scare me, you know. I eat spiders for breakfast.”

“Since when?” asked Judy.

“Since —” Stink stopped.
Should he say it? Out loud?

“What’s the matter? Got a
frog
in your throat?” Judy stopped on the top stair. “Wait a second.” She squinted at Stink like she was seeing him for the very first time.

“Mom! Dad!” called Judy. “Stink thinks he’s a frog!”

Stink had a Peter Parker of a secret. Not even the evil Dr. Octopus could drag it out of him. Aw, who was he kidding? He couldn’t hold it in one more second. He ran to the phone to call Sophie and Webster and told them to come over right away.

When they got to the house, Stink motioned for his friends to come upstairs.

“Psst!” Stink whispered. “Up here.”

“Why are we whispering?” Sophie asked.

“Because. It’s a secret.”

He pulled out the fishbowl from under his desk. “First, I gotta ask — would you guys still be my friends even if I were a frog?”

“I’d still be your friend,” Sophie told him. “I’d put you in a shoe box and feed you flies.”

“I’d still be your friend,” said Webster. “I’d carry you in my pocket and let you take a bath in the sink.”

“Thanks! Now, get ready for your eyes to pop out.” Webster gulped. Sophie pushed her glasses up on her nose.

“Ready?” Stink asked.

“Ready,” said Sophie and Webster.

“Are you sure?”

“Stink!” said Webster impatiently.

“I’m just saying. It’s not for the faint of heart, as Peter Parker would say.”

Sophie held her breath. Webster held his breath.