Streamline (11 page)

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Authors: Jennifer Lane

BOOK: Streamline
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“And which step were you working during your last relapse?” Jason searched his memory. “Nine.”

“And what step during the relapse before that?”

“Nine. What’s your point?”

“My point is you’re getting off track every time you try to make amends because you’re missing the biggest one of them al . Who have you harmed the most with your alcoholism?”

“My brother and my mom,” Jason said immediately. “My biggest failure is my inability to protect them from my dad.”

“And what’s preventing you from protecting them?” Jason furrowed his brow. “The threat of jail time.” An understanding dawned on him. “But if I’m in prison, I can’t protect them from my dad any better than if I’m in Seattle.”

“Jason, I can’t imagine any court handing down a long jail sentence for petty thefts made when you were a minor, especially if you turn yourself in.”

He took a deep breath. “I’ll think about it.”

“That’s all I ask. Listen, I got another call.”

“Thanks, Walt.” Jason ended the call and stared out at the Florida landscape.

Marcus glanced over at Jason as he pulled into the church parking lot. “Looks like you’ve got a lot on your mind.”

“Yeah.” Jason picked at his fingernails. “I don’t know how much you got, but basically I’m a criminal.” Marcus didn’t say a word.

“I stole a bunch of cell phones from a warehouse when I was seventeen, and my dad caught me.” Flashes of that beating overtook him — all he could see were livid violet eyes staring at him, hating him. That was the last time he’d ever even
thought
about stealing.

He heard Marcus speaking in the distance, and Jason forced his mind back to the present. “What?”

“I’m not too proud of my past either. But here we are.” Jason focused on the church. “Time to make a better present.” As they walked to the back entrance, Jason put his hand on Marcus’s shoulder. It was a new experience for him to trust a tall Black man. He was grateful for the opportunity.

19. The Best Day of My Life

Audrey had the radio cranked up as she pulled into her driveway.

The endorphins rushed through her body, and she always felt like singing following a tough practice. Her dad used to love listening to her. She collected her swim bag and backpack and, weighted down, she unfolded herself from her Hyundai.

Still crooning the song, Audrey paused to open the front door and noticed movement at the edge of her line of vision.

“Leo!” She held her hand to her chest and watched him approach from the side of her house.

Her bright smile faded as he got closer. His lip was swollen, and there was dried blood on his forehead. “What
happened?”
Leo’s eyes darted around the overgrown yard. “Can we go inside? I’ll tell you there.”

Audrey paused. Wasn’t he supposed to be in treatment? “Okay.

My mom’s out of town again.” She stuck the key in the lock, and Leo lifted her swim bag from her shoulder.

Once inside, they set down the bags and stared at each other.

Something seemed different. He seemed tense, like he had so much to say but no idea how to say it. He was on the verge of something — she didn’t know what.

“Can I hug you?” he asked tentatively.

She gave him a strange look. “Of course.”

She buried her head in his chest. As soon as he scooped her into his arms, a dam released inside of him, and Audrey felt his body tremble as he sobbed.

“Oh, Leo.” She squeezed him tighter. “What’s wrong, honey?”

“I can’t talk about it,” he choked.

“It’s okay.”

After smoothing circles on his back, she attempted to meet his eyes, but he hung his head low and sniffed. She took his hand and led him down the hallway to the living room and the leather sofa, the only nice piece of furniture she and her mother had been able to keep.

Holding his hands in hers, Audrey sat quietly next to Leo as he cried. At one point she grabbed some tissues from the end table and handed them to him. He balled them up in his fist.

“My dad’s back in town,” he finally said.

It took a moment to register. “Uh-oh, you didn’t want him knowing about the pills. Did he find out?” He nodded, still looking down.

She suddenly understood. “Did your dad do that to your face?” When Leo nodded again, Audrey felt sadness and rage envelop her. She didn’t know what to say or do. Leo wouldn’t look at her, but she sensed he was waiting for her response.

She clenched her teeth. “No wonder you call him Cruel SOB.

I want to kill him.”

Leo looked up, seeming startled. “It’s my fault, Audrey. He wouldn’t have exploded if I didn’t get hooked on pills.”

“Your fault? How is your dad beating the crap out of you
your
fault? You don’t deserve that!”

The words came pouring out then, spoken through the tears that kept flowing. “CS yanked me out of treatment and said I couldn’t go back,” Leo confessed. “He’s going to drug test me, and if I fail then I’m in huge trouble. Jason — he’s been gone so long because my dad threatened to turn him into the police. I think CS beat up Jason too, and he’s going to make him go away again. But the worst part is he’s forcing me go to the Naval Academy. That’s nine years we’ll be apart! I won’t get to go to FSU with you, I won’t get to see you…” His voice cracked.

Seeing Leo so hurt and vulnerable disintegrated Audrey’s resolve, and she began to cry too. She’d never loved Leo as much as she did in this moment. He’d hidden his emotions for so long, but he couldn’t anymore. Just as he’d first come to know her when she was skinny dipping, she now saw him naked.

Her voice was gentle. “I always knew you’d go to the Academy.”

“You did?” His eyes darted up.

She nodded. “You have this sick love of pain. Even if your dad didn’t make you go, you’d end up there anyway.” He cried harder. “I wish I wasn’t like that. I don’t want to be apart from you.”

“We’ll make it. We’ll survive.” Although she knew how uncomfortable he was, his lowered defenses were the most potent aphrodisiac she’d ever experienced. To have him turn to her for help? Audrey felt intimately connected.

Slowly advancing, careful not to scare him, Audrey placed a soft kiss on the gash above his eyebrow, tasting his metallic blood on her lips. Drifting downward, her lips tenderly brushed a bruise near his cheekbone and tasted the saltiness of his tears. Her eyes met his, and she was overwhelmed by their closeness. “I want to take your pain away.” She kissed the cut on his lower lip.

Leo slowly met her mouth, and he scooted down to lie back on the sofa as their kisses deepened. Their tongues played lightly with each other while Audrey took off her shirt, and tossed it to the floor.

Leo stroked the length of her back, and she felt the arousal building inside her.

Straddling him, she stared down for several long seconds, knowing what might happen if they continued. Then Audrey lifted Leo’s bloodstained T-shirt over his head. She admired his long, fluid swimmer’s muscles. He wasn’t bulky or beefy, simply lean and powerful.

She brushed her fingers over a dark purple bruise below his ribcage and up his abdomen. He shivered.

Smiling as he watched her every move, Audrey reached behind and unclasped her bra, shyly showing Leo her breasts. He sat up to explore and caress her skin. Her heart pounding with excitement, Audrey reached down to unbutton his jeans and sensed they were about to enter uncharted waters.

Leo allowed her to help him out of his jeans, and he tugged off her pants, the removal of clothing adeptly performed between hot kisses. They held each other, skin-on-skin, Leo now wearing only his boxers and Audrey her lacy pink underwear.

“¿Estás lista?”
Leo asked, gazing into her eyes.

“I’m ready.”

“¿Estás segura?”

“Sí,
I’m sure.” She blinked rapidly, wondering if she should say it out loud for the first time. Boldness won over caution.
“Te amo,
Leo.” The tension in his face seemed to melt. “I love you too, Audrey.” Soon they lay naked together on the sofa, which didn’t feel as strange as Audrey would’ve predicted. Perhaps so much time together in swimsuits lessened the awkwardness. Still, she felt nervous about what was to come.

Leo cleared his throat. “Uh, Audrey, I don’t have any protection.”

“Me neither, but let’s not stop. I’m, um, I’m not very regular because of swimming, so we should be fine.” Leo hesitated. “We shouldn’t do this.”

“Probably not.” She gave him a devilish grin and pressed her mouth against his. He eagerly returned her kiss, not seeming to care about his cuts and bruises. Their bodies melded together. Audrey felt him beneath her, and her excitement rose as well.

Audrey paused and lifted her head up.

“Have…have you changed your mind?” Leo asked.

She smiled. “No, but if you even
think
about throwing up right now, it’s over between us.”

Leo laughed and she giggled. It had been so long since he’d even smiled. It felt wonderful to share a laugh with him. She tried to relax as they fumbled together. He took it out like a sprinter, and brought it home like a distance swimmer.

Lying together, her cheek against his chest, Audrey hummed the song from the radio again while he rubbed slow circles on her back.

She listened to his steady heartbeat and the echo of his words in his chest as he spoke. “Today was horrible before I came over.” He squeezed her tighter, holding her flush to his sweaty body. “You’ve made it the best day of my life, Audrey. Thank you.”

All James could hear was the even sound of his breathing as he rounded the corner of the track. He ignored the high school track team as he left them in the dust. Running was the only way to soothe his anger and help him think. The conversation with his wife ran circles in his head as he ran circles on the track.

That she would dare threaten to leave him was unfathomable after all he had done for her. He could have easily left after the car accident, but nobly, he’d stayed. He’d stuck by Mary’s side despite her crippling injuries and the crippling medical bills. He’d stuck it out, practically as a single parent to two rambunctious boys, with the older one constantly testing the limits. He’d stuck by her side even though they’d not made love since the accident. At first she’d said sex was too painful, then she’d had no desire.

Naturally he’d had to turn elsewhere. Her overall lack of gratitude was appalling.

Then there was his first son. For four years he’d blocked all thoughts of Jason, and the boy’s surprise appearance had jolted him.

Jason was more like James than either wanted to admit.

Despite what she’d become, had he not met Mary, James knew he’d be in prison or maybe even a homeless alcoholic himself. Jason hadn’t encountered
his
Mary yet, and probably never would. James realized he was losing her — the woman who’d changed his life. But he’d fight to keep her.

James pushed himself harder as he began the fourth mile. It felt good for his lungs to burn and his legs to focus singularly on his pace. However, the sickening image of Leo’s forehead wound kept flashing in his mind. His son unconscious and bloodied…he’d gone way too far.

But Leo
had
to succeed, and James’s anger upon learning about the drug abuse had overtaken his senses. Leo was the one shining beacon for the family — the only sign James’s life mattered at all.

Sometimes the compliments he received about Leo’s swimming and school performances were the only thing that kept him going. He’d given up on Mary and Jason long ago, but Leo could save the family.

As James accelerated his pace again for the fifth mile, he started planning Leo’s glorious return to swimming. Now that the drug was out of his system, he might have a chance to come back for the state meet. James regretted that Leo’s bruises would prevent him from returning to practice anytime soon, but maybe he could sneak in some laps at the community pool.

He’d just have to keep him focused — no distractions from school and sport. Up to this point James had mostly ignored Audrey, but the second Leo’s grades slipped, he’d order an end to the relationship.

Suddenly James stopped on the track, hands on his knees and breathing heavily. He knew exactly where Leo had gone: Audrey’s.

James sprinted to his car. He had to retrieve his son and make his family whole again. It was his duty as a father.

20. Narcissus

Audrey peeled herself away from Leo, the leather making a scrunching noise as her weight shifted off the sofa. She bent down to retrieve the various clothing items strewn on the floor. Leo watched her intently. The only thing he wore was a look of bliss.

“You’re gorgeous, Aud.”

She blushed as she pulled up her pants. “Thank you.” She threw boxer shorts in his direction. “Get dressed, and I’ll make us something to eat. I’m starving!”

“Me too.” He grinned. “That’s the best workout I’ve had in days.” Audrey scooped up Leo’s jeans from the floor. As she held them out, she heard a strange rattling noise. Curious, she reached into the pocket as Leo lunged for her.

He was too late.

“What are these doing here?” She held up the bottle of pills, the name Mary Scott clearly visible on the prescription label.

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