Summer Fling: Compass Girls, Book 3 (21 page)

Bucky bowed his head, guilt and anxiety at war in his expression.

“It wasn’t Bucky’s fault. I coerced him.”

Bucky shot her a grateful look, but her defense didn’t appear to help much.
 

“Don’t give a shit. He got you up on that horse. I’m not likely going to forget that anytime soon.”

Jade tried to shake off Liam’s hand, but his grip was implacable. “What are you doing here anyway? What about the meeting?”

“I forgot the contracts. They’re on the kitchen table.”

“Oh.”

“Did you really think you were going to take a joyride on one of my best horses without me finding out?”

Actually, she knew he’d find out. While Bucky wouldn’t have said anything, the other hands would have filled Liam in the second he got home, anxious to share the gossip. She’d expected his anger. It was what she’d been banking on.

Once they were in Liam’s bedroom, he released her.
 

She whirled on him. “Finished with the bully act?”

“Don’t test me, Jade.”

Jade lowered her head, struggled to take a deep breath, but her lungs had seized, gone tight. The walls of the room closed in on her. She’d ridden the horse with the sole purpose of starting this fight. Now…now she didn’t know what to do. “I need to leave.”

“Why?”

“I just need some space, okay? You’re suffocating me.”

Silence fell as Jade fought to find some semblance of composure. Liam walked to the bed and sank down on the mattress. “What happened? What freaked you out?”

“You’re changing the rules again.”

He frowned. “How?”

“Is this a fling, Liam?”

He didn’t respond, his silence answering her question.

“It was never that to you, was it?”

He looked at her, but again, silence was her response.

“I can’t be what you need. I’ll never be the meek, quiet little woman who doesn’t blink twice without permission. I can’t be
her
. I’ll never be her.”

“Who?”

“Celia.”

Liam reared back as if she’d punched him. “I don’t want a Celia replacement. I want
you
.”

“Why?”

“You don’t get it, do you, Jade? You don’t see it.”

Suddenly she felt exhausted, worn out. She wanted to go home to her little cabin on Compass Ranch, crawl into her bed and sleep for the next five or six years. “You lied to me. This whole summer has been one big fib.”

Liam didn’t bother to deny it. “Yeah. It was. I didn’t go into this thinking it would end with Sienna and Daniel’s wedding.”

“What were you hoping for?”

“Something a lot more long-term.”

“You said you loved me.”

He sighed, nodding as understanding lit his face. “Got it. Now I see. So you got up on the horse to piss me off. To pick a fight.”

Jade looked down at her hands. “I told you I suck at relationships.”

Liam chuckled, though the sound was more sad than amused. “You’re right. You do.” Liam stood and walked toward her. Then he cupped her face and forced her to look at him. “But I still love you.”

He tugged her closer, kissed her softly. Soon his touches became more passionate.

Jade tried to take a step away, but he wouldn’t release her. “Sex isn’t going to change how I feel, Liam.”

“I know that. But right now, it’s all I have to offer that you’ll accept.” He continued to kiss her, his lips worshipping her mouth, cheeks, ears, neck. He burned a sensual path along her skin until Jade stopped caring about the lies, the future. All of it.
 

She wanted him.
 

Jade tugged his T-shirt over his head, doing a little lip reconnaissance of her own. She kissed his chest, licked his tight brown nipples, bit his pecs. Words faded, giving way to actions.

In this, they were connected, similar. Liam undressed her. As he worked to remove her clothes, her hands were busy stripping him as well. Within minutes, they were naked and they fell onto the bed, their limbs tangled together as they kissed, touched, caressed, stroked.

Jade ran her fingernails along his back when Liam took her under him. His lips never left hers as he placed his cock at her opening and pushed in. He thrust hard, deep, sure. The rhythm was familiar, comforting.
 

She wrapped her legs around his waist, urging him to move faster. Through it all, their lips were connected. Jade loved sharing the same air, savored his smell, his taste. In just two short months, Liam had enmeshed himself in every part of her world—claiming her work hours, her meal times, holding her as she slept. Now she couldn’t imagine doing any of those things without him.

His fingers grazed her clit, drawing her back into the moment, away from the thoughts that left her unsettled.

“This is as easy as breathing, Jade. Just let go.”

She knew he wasn’t talking about sex, but it was simpler to pretend he was. Her body trembled as she let the climax claim her, wash away every worry, every fear.

Liam joined her, his body tensing as he came. For several minutes, neither of them moved, made no attempt to part.
 

Jade was the first to pull away. She started to rise, but Liam refused to let her go. Tugging back the sheets, he tucked her beneath them with him.

“Stay here,” he whispered. “Just a little longer.”

She allowed herself to accept the embrace, to soak up the closeness, the intimacy. Closing her eyes, Jade gave in to the fatigue of the past few weeks, letting sleep claim her in a rare afternoon nap.

“What are you doing here?”

Jade dropped her suitcase by the door, then walked over to sit down on the couch, exhausted, frustrated. “I live here.”

Sterling claimed the spot next to her. “Oh jeez. What did you do?”

“Why do you assume I’m the one who screwed things up?”

Sterling grinned at her. “Didn’t you?”

Jade narrowed her eyes, gave her cousin a dirty look. “Yeah. But you could at least pretend I’m not always a fuckup.”

“Sorry. So let’s have it. What happened?”

“He turned all possessive and controlling on me. Started trying to tell me what I could and couldn’t do. I don’t play that way.”

Sterling frowned. “That doesn’t sound like Liam. What did he tell you not to do?”

“I hopped on the back of one of his bucking broncs. Felt like taking a ride. He freaked out about it.”

“No shit. I mean, did he say it was okay…before you did it?”

Jade shook her head, trying to ward off the headache looming.

“Jesus. Why would you do something so stupid?”

Jade rubbed her eyes wearily. She was tired of lying. To her cousin, to Liam, to herself. “He said he loved me.”

Sterling leaned her head back and looked at the ceiling, disappointment rife on her face. “Ah. He committed the cardinal sin. Now I’m starting to get the picture. So you reverted to character and found a way to sabotage the relationship.”

“I don’t ruin my relationships.”

Sterling stood up, throwing her hands into the air with frustration. “Dammit, Jade! That’s all you ever do. It’s been the same pattern since high school.”

Jade was too shattered to argue. Besides, she couldn’t find the words to defend herself. She’d gotten on that horse because she’d known it would infuriate Liam. She’d wanted to provoke the fight because it would give her a chance to get away.
 

Unfortunately, Liam wasn’t fooled. He’d dragged her to his bedroom and made love to her. Her stomach clenched.

Why did a word that usually gave a person so much joy scare the shit out of her? It was always the same. Someone would get too close and she’d take off in the opposite direction as fast as her Harley would carry her.

Liam had rolled over when she left his bed less than an hour ago, watching in silence as she packed her things. Once the suitcase was filled, she’d sat down on the edge of the mattress.

“So that’s it?” he’d asked.

“I just need some time to figure stuff out.”

Liam had given her a sad smile. “Looks to me like you already have.”

She’d wanted to protest, but he’d sat up and placed a soft finger against her lips. “Do what you have to do, kiddo.”

He’d kissed her, then said goodbye.
 

She’d driven straight here, fighting like the devil to hold in the tears. She didn’t bother to pretend that she wouldn’t shed a lot of them tonight.

Sterling plopped down on the chair across the room. “Do you remember Sienna’s sixteenth birthday?”

Jade nodded, confused by Sterling’s sudden change of subject. “Sure. We had that sleepover.” They’d snuck up to the hayloft with a bottle of tequila Jade had smuggled out of her dad’s liquor cabinet. They’d gotten wasted, then busted by Uncle Seth and Jake. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“You made a vow that night. I didn’t think much of it at the time because we were just kids. What the hell did we know about love and relationships? You said you planned to always be the person who did the breaking up. That you’d never let anyone hurt you. Do you remember that?”

Jade would never forget it. They’d been talking about some girl at school whose boyfriend had dumped her. The girl had been devastated, crying for weeks. On its own, Jade suspected Jenna’s typical-young girl response wouldn’t have made much of a mark on her. But something else happened around the same time and combined, the two events had made a lasting impression.

Three days after watching Jenna fall apart in English class, Jade had gone to Compass Ranch to ride her horse. While she was out that day, she’d taken a different route than usual simply because it was calling for rain and Uncle Silas had told her to be quick, otherwise she’d get drenched.

She skirted the Compton graveyard, surprised to find Vivi sitting in front of Granddaddy JD’s headstone. She was crying. In Jade’s entire life, she’d never seen her grandmother’s tears, never witnessed such heartbroken agony. Jade had sat there for only a few minutes, uncertain if she should stay to comfort her grandmother or if she should leave. She opted for quietly slipping away, realizing Vivi wouldn’t want Jade to see her so sad.

Jade had cried herself to sleep that night, promising herself she’d never let anyone into her heart. Never open herself up for such excruciating pain. Then, at Sienna’s sleepover, she’d shared that vow with her cousins.

She’d meant the words. And, because she had more than her fair share of Compton stubbornness, she’d managed to remain true to that oath for eight years.

Until Liam came along with his offer of a summer fling.

Now…

Sterling broke the silence that had fallen between them. “Liam is one of the nicest guys I’ve ever known, Jade. He loves you and he’d never hurt you. I can’t understand why you would choose to live alone when something so wonderful is sitting right there in front of you.”

Because love doesn’t last forever.
The words lingered on Jade’s lips, but she didn’t speak them aloud. Instead, she stood up and grabbed her suitcase.
 

“It just wouldn’t work, Sterling.” She started to head to her bedroom, but Sterling wasn’t finished making her case.

“This is a shitty way to live your life, Jade.”

Jade knew her cousin was right, but she simply wasn’t strong enough to face the alternative.

Chapter Ten

Jade strolled through the graveyard, not bothering to turn on the flashlight on her phone. She’d become a regular midnight visitor here since her sixteenth birthday, and the darkness no longer disturbed her. A week had passed since she’d packed her bag and left Liam’s house under the guise of “figuring things out”.

So far all she’d managed to sort out was her closet, the kitchen cabinets, the space under the bathroom sink and the storeroom at Spurs. She’d been a cleaning maniac, taking on one tedious task after the other because it helped her avoid thinking about anything real.
 

Liam.

Tonight had been the first time she’d seen him, though she hadn’t found the courage to speak to him much beyond a friendly, “Hello. How are you?”
 

Then she’d plastered on a fake smile, going through the motions of the wedding rehearsal, fighting like the devil to hide her misery because she wouldn’t ruin Sienna’s big day for all the money in the world. She’d made it through the practice run of the ceremony, the meal, the longest dessert in history and countless toasts to the happy couple.

Finally, the family began to drift away, heading to their own homes and beds to rest before the wedding tomorrow. Jade had walked to the cabin with Sterling after saying an awkward goodnight to Liam. She’d tossed and turned for nearly an hour before pulling on some clothes and heading here.

When she reached his gravestone, Jade dropped down to her knees and bowed her head miserably. “Hey, George.”

The silence that met her greeting didn’t usually bother her, but tonight, it merely reinforced how lonely she felt.