Surrendering to Us (24 page)

“We could always bribe the nurses. What do you think they’d want?” I leaned against Lucah. I was exhausted, but not the kind of exhausted where I wanted to sleep. No, I knew sleep was far away, in a place I couldn’t reach.

“I could offer sexual favors,” he said, sticking out his tongue. There was his sense of humor.

“Yeah, I’m sure they would love that, but I’m not good at sharing.”

Ryder was awake when we got back to his room, and flipping through the channels on the small television mounted on the wall. He’d also propped his bed up and had pushed the sleeves of his hospital gown up so everyone would have full view of his tattoos.

“Feeling better?” Lucah said, and Ryder nodded.

“You here to watch me?” Ryder said, his voice still ragged.

Lucah opened his mouth, probably to say something about him needing to be watched, but then he changed his mind.

“Do you need watching?”

Ryder lifted one shoulder.

“You tell me.”

They weren’t going to get anywhere like that.

“I’m not playing this game with you, Ryder. We don’t have to talk about it right now. But we will talk, understand? There will be lots and lots of talking and you won’t be able to avoid it. We’re going to talk so much we’ll probably lose our voices and then we’ll talk some more.” Ryder was silent after Lucah’s speech.

I half expected him to throw a tantrum like a child, but he just turned his attention back to the television and kept flipping the channels.

Lucah found an extra chair and brought it into the room so there was one for each of us and then got out his phone.

“Visiting hours end at nine,” Ryder said after several minutes of complete silence.

“Good to know,” Lucah responded, looking up from his phone. I’d been reading a book on mine.

“Which means you will have to leave.”

“I’m not a visitor. I’m family. And I’m not leaving,” Lucah said, giving Ryder a smug smile.

“They’re going to kick you out.”

“No, I don’t think they will.” He said it without looking up from his phone. I didn’t know how strict the policy was, but if anyone could get the nurses to bend it, it would be Lucah.

I shivered and brought my feet up on the chair.

“Are you cold? I’m sure there’s an extra blanket here somewhere.” Lucah got up but Ryder’s voice stopped him.

“Take one of mine.” There was an extra blanket folded on the bottom of his bed. Lucah unfolded it and draped it over me, tucking the edges in. I pulled off my shoes and let them drop to the floor. I wished I would have thought to bring a change of clothes.

I was trying to get comfortable on the chair with the scratchy blanket when another nurse came in.

“Someone left this for you at the nurses’ station,” she said in that hushed voice. She held up a bag and I realized that my other friends (Chloe and Marisol, judging by the note left on the top) had come through. Sloane must have called them and asked if they would bring us some clothes. I was beyond blessed in the friend department.

“And how are we doing?” She gave Ryder a bright smile. He gave her an icy stare in return.

“Fucking fantastic,” he said in a deadpan voice. The nurse’s sweet demeanor didn’t falter. That probably wasn’t the worst thing someone had ever said to her. Not even close.

“Good to hear,” she said, and went to take his blood pressure and check his meds and ask him a few questions. I headed for the bathroom to change. I’d been given comfortable sweats and a baggy shirt and sweatshirt to go over it, socks and even a pair of slippers. It was the outfit I wore when I was sick, or so exhausted from work I didn’t want to wear real clothes. I took my hair down and put it back up in a messy bun to go with the messy outfit. When I came out, the nurse was gone, Ryder was still looking surly and Lucah was staring at his phone.

“Chloe and Marisol left you a change of clothes too,” I said, handing the bag to Lucah. They’d left him pajamas and a suit for the next day.

“Good women, your friends. Especially Sloane,” Lucah said, taking the bag and going to change in the bathroom. He glanced at Ryder when he said it, but Ryder was staring at the television again. I curled back up in the chair and pulled the blanket over me.

“You don’t have to be here. I know you’re not my biggest fan.” He didn’t look at me when he spoke, so I didn’t when I answered.

“I’m not here for you. You’re my boyfriend’s brother. And he wants me here, so I’m here. Deal with it.” I’d expected a retort, but Lucah came out of the bathroom and stopped Ryder from saying whatever it was that he wanted to say. Lucah would put up with Ryder saying whatever he wanted to him, but saying it to me probably wouldn’t go over well.

“Everything okay?” he said, looking from me to Ryder, who was still concentrating on the television as if he was trying to blow it up through telekinesis.

“Fucking fantastic,” I said, using the same tone Ryder had earlier. I was rewarded by a stifled chuckle from the guy in the hospital bed.

Lucah shook his head and came over to give me a kiss on my forehead.

“You’re pretty fucking fantastic.”

“Same to you.”

He went back to his chair and pulled out his phone again. I watched the television flash from channel to channel. It was probably going to give me a seizure.

“Why don’t you pick something and stay on it?” Lucah said from his corner.

Ryder just kept clicking, and Lucah sighed. I was getting a view of what their childhood had been like. Some things didn’t change, no matter how old you got.

“Sunshine, wake up,” Lucah said, kissing my cheek. I woke slowly, and as soon as I was back in the world of the awake, I wanted to go back to the world of sleep.

The chair I’d gone to bed in had left cricks and kinks and bad spots all over my body. My neck was completely torqued to one side. I moaned as I stretched. I was definitely going to have to make an appointment with my chiropractor.

“Oh my GOD,” I said, opening my eyes and greeting the horrible bitch known as morning. I hated her almost as much as I hated Mother Nature for her little monthly gift.

I tried to stand and my legs wouldn’t support me because they’d been too cramped all night. But Lucah was there to catch me.

“What time is it?” I looked around the room, and finally found a clock on the wall. It was six thirty. Fuck me. That was probably the worst night of sleep I’d ever had in my life and now I had to go work. Without Lucah.

I sat back down in the chair and pulled my hair out and ran my fingers through it. I didn’t want to take a shower here, but there really wasn’t time to go home and bathe before I went to work. This would be one of those days when Lucah’s hair skills were invaluable.

Ryder was asleep, curled on his side with the lines for his IVs all tangled up like balloon strings.

Lucah handed me a cup of coffee.

“You found the nurses’ station,” I whispered, taking it from him. He looked as terrible as I felt. Dark circles etched themselves under his glorious blue eyes and his hair was nearly standing on end. Probably from all the times he’d run his fingers through it with anxiety.

“I did. I’ve been patronizing it all night, but no one said anything. I also got some muffins from the vending machine down the hall, if you want one.” My stomach was churning and upset, so I stuck with the coffee at the moment.

“I wish I could stay here with you,” I said, and he pulled his chair over so it was right across from mine and put my feet in his lap, pulled off my slippers and started rubbing them. He was so good to me. To everyone he loved.

“I know, but you need to go to work. I’ll be fine here. Now that he’s getting back to normal, I’m better. Besides, Tate and April are coming up again. And I have the sneaking suspicion that Sloane is going to drop by as well.” I knew she would.

“I probably look like shit.”

“You’re beautiful no matter what.” He switched to my other foot as I sipped my coffee. The hospital was bustling. There was never an “off” time. The lights were always on, and someone was always there. It was comforting, actually, to know that when you needed someone, the good people of Mass Gen were available.

“You’re biased, Mr. Blythe. But I’ll let it slide.” I finished my coffee and then went to the bathroom to try to get myself somewhat presentable. I turned on the light and almost screamed. It was that bad.

I took a deep breath and started with washing my face and untangling my hair and dressing in the clothes the ladies had picked for me. I loaded on the makeup and went for bold lips so people would look at them and not my eyes.

I slipped into my shoes and walked back out. Lucah whistled quietly.

“Whatever,” I said, rolling my eyes. “Can you help with this?” I pointed to my head. Lucah patted his lap. I sat down and he worked on my hair, French braiding the sides back into a bun. Ryder mumbled something in his sleep and turned over. The machines picked up for a moment and then settled back to their steady beeping.

“Done,” Lucah said, patting my hair. I got up and checked it in the mirror. Perfection. I munched on one of the muffins and had another cup of coffee. And then it was time for me to get my ass to work.

“I love you. If anything happens, or you need ANYTHING, and you don’t call me, you’re going to be in a bed next to your brother. I will be texting you throughout the day to check in, and as soon as I can leave, I’ll be here.”

“Yes, Miss Clarke.” He gave me another kiss and I waved goodbye to Ryder’s sleeping form. He’d probably flip me off if he were awake. With one last look at Lucah, I headed off to work without him, for the first time in a long time.

I called Dad on the cab ride over to the office to ask him if he could call Lucah’s department and tell them that he wasn’t going to be in. I didn’t explain the details, just said that Lucah was under the weather. I didn’t know what to tell Dad about the Ryder situation, but I wanted to talk to Lucah about it before I told anyone else. It wasn’t my story to tell.

“Good morning,” I said to Lilia, trying to smile as if I’d had a full night of restful sleep.

“Good morning,” Lilia said, and then looked up at me. “Are you okay?” She kept her voice down, which I appreciated, but my makeup job apparently hadn’t been good enough, which I did not.

“Just had a long night. Couldn’t sleep. Thinking about too many things.” She nodded in understanding. I leaned closer.

“It’s kind of a long story, but hopefully I’ll tell you later.” She nodded again.

“Understood. Here are your messages and these are the files you were looking for. Your father asked to see you when you have a chance, and Violet left this for you.” I dealt with the Violet thing first. It was a note asking if she could meet with me later. Sure. I’d get right on that. I gathered everything up in my arms and dumped it on my desk. Would anyone notice if I pulled my chair in and crawled under my desk and went to sleep? I considered it, but the pile of things I had to deal with called to me and promised me a mental vacation from the Lucah/Ryder situation, even if it was only for a few minutes.

I sat down in my chair and stretched my neck, cringing. And then my phone rang. So it began.

I sent Lucah texts every fifteen minutes. It was probably excessive, but I couldn’t help myself. He responded to each one, saying that there was nothing new to report, he was fine, he didn’t need anything and Tate and April were there, and Ryder was getting his “spirit” back. That was probably a kind way one of the nurses had put it.

At lunch I considered going over, but Lucah assured me I didn’t have to. He texted me five minutes later and said that Sloane had arrived with takeout for everyone and more clothes for Lucah and more coffee.

She was a saint. I took back any bad thing I’d ever said about her. I sent her a message thanking her from the bottom of my heart. She just sent back a smiley face.

Instead of going to the hospital, I took Lilia out to lunch again, but this time I didn’t want to talk about me.

“So, now that I’ve dumped all my personal crap on you, why don’t you dump some on me?” I said after we’d ordered drinks.

She looked at me as if I’d suggested naked mud wrestling.