Read Surrendering to Us Online
Authors: Chelsea M. Cameron
“Oh. Wow. I was prepared for you to throw your drink in my face, or scream at me. Obviously, I underestimated you. So I’m sorry about that as well. I guess I have a lot to be sorry for.” She laughed a little without humor.
“Most of the things you’re saying sorry for are out of your control. If I’d been a nicer person, maybe you would have felt more comfortable coming to me about this sooner and we wouldn’t have had to go through this. So I’m sorry for not being nicer to you.” I didn’t need to say why I hadn’t been nice. Well, I didn’t want to. It was too junior high.
“This whole thing is so awkward. Do you think we could maybe move past it? Start over?” I could try. That was the best I could do. I would never be able to erase the fact that she had dated my boyfriend, but I could try to push past it and not let it stand between us becoming friends.
“When you first got hired, I was so happy because I thought I finally had a woman my age who wanted to go shoe shopping and didn’t care about golf. I am so sick of hearing about golf.”
“Oh my GOD, I know! I think some of them treat it as their religion and worship at the altar of Arnold Palmer.”
“They probably have altars in their homes that their wives don’t know about,” I added.
She put her hand over her heart. “I pledge allegiance, to the golf ball . . . “ For the first time since I’d met her, I lost myself in laughter with Violet. Of course she was funny. Lucah wouldn’t be attracted to anyone without a twisted sense of humor.
She laughed with me, and it was a cute, innocent sound. The barrier that had been put up between us when I’d found out that she and Lucah had been together cracked a little at the sound. It was still going to be there for a little while, and there would always be the memory of it, but if we could take it down a little, a piece at a time, we’d get somewhere.
The rest of our lunch was completely different than the beginning. Once we started talking about our shared hatred of golf, all sorts of conversational doors burst open wide, and we both ended up being late getting back to the office because we just couldn’t shut up.
We giggled as we rode the elevator up to our floor and got sharp glances from some of the other elevator riders, which only made us laugh harder. Being with Violet was like regressing to being a teenager again. Silly and giggly and completely unserious.
“Okay, well. I guess I’ll see you later, Miss Clarke,” she said with pretend formality.
“It was a lovely lunch, Miss Cooper. We shall have to do it again soon. Please let me know when you are free.” I sounded like I was trying to mock my mother. It was a good thing she wasn’t around.
We shook hands and tried not to laugh before she walked back down the hall to her office.
Lilia watched her go and then turned to me.
“That ended differently than it began,” she said, eyebrows higher than I’d ever seen them.
“You don’t know the half of it.” I decided not to tell Lilia about what Violet had revealed to me regarding the spying and so forth. It seemed like a violation of Violet’s trust, and I didn’t think she’d want me to tell anyone, even my assistant. So I wasn’t going to tell anyone, but Lucah, of course. And Dad. Je-sus Christ, I had to tell Dad.
In all my joy at my newfound friend, I’d completely forgotten about the shit the Board had pulled.
“I know you need to go to lunch, but can you wait, like, ten minutes? I have to go see Mr. Clarke about something and it’s kind of an emergency.”
“Yeah, no problem, of course. Go, go.” I dashed down the hall at a fast clip that wasn’t quite a run, but would get me there as quickly as possible. Mrs. Andrews wasn’t at her desk, so she was on probably lunch, which hopefully meant Dad wasn’t.
I knocked a few times and waited.
“Come in,” he said, and I took a breath before opening the door. I didn’t want to drop this bomb on him, but he needed to know.
“Rory! It’s nice to see you. Did you just come back from lunch?” He actually looked a little happier today. Great. I was going to stomp all over that in about five seconds.
“I just had lunch with Violet and she told me something you need to know.” His attention immediately narrowed and snapped on me.
I closed the door and sat down.
“She said the Board wanted to bribe her to become friends with me and then spy on me, and you by association.” He was silent for a moment, digesting my words. They didn’t appear to be going down easy.
“I thought as much. She’s not the first, and I don’t think she’ll be the last. This has got to stop,” he said, shaking his head.
“Why not have them arrested? I’m pretty sure they’ve broken a law or two.” Or twelve.
“That kind of thing is very hard to prove without recordings, or a paper trail, and they’ve been very careful to cover their tracks and never say anything outright that could incriminate them. They know the laws and how to walk along the edges and toe the line, but not cross it.” I had a whole string of words I wanted to scream, but they definitely weren’t appropriate in a work setting, or in front of my father.
“Well, I think I have her on my side now, so we don’t have to worry about Violet. Who else have they gotten to?” Dad just shook his head at that.
“The less you know about that, the better. Like I said, I’m handling it. You just make sure they really haven’t gotten their hooks into Miss Cooper, but just in case, play it close to the vest and always trust your gut, Rory.” His classic advice that was right for every situation.
“I will. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.”
“You’re never the bearer of bad news. It’s news I already knew, and it’s always good to see my girl.” My heart got melty so I went and gave him a hug before walking at a more normal pace back to my desk and telling Lilia that everything was under control and she could go to lunch.
I thought about calling Lucah and telling him about everything with Violet, but I decided to wait and tell him after work. I hoped he would be pleased that the two of us were friendly. He probably would not be pleased that she’d been turned into a pawn slash spy by the Board. Or maybe I shouldn’t tell him that part.
“So Violet and I had lunch today,” I said as we hopped into a cab to avoid walking to the T station in the rain that threatened to fall from the sky at any moment. As soon as the door shut and Lucah told the driver the address, drops pattered on the windshield.
“You did? How did that go?” He turned in his seat to face me.
“Uh, surprisingly well. I think we’re friends now. And don’t look so skeptical,” I said.
“What? I wasn’t skeptical. I’m just surprised that all it took was one lunch for you to bury the hatchet.” The rain started coming down harder, sheeting against the windows and blurring the world outside.
“What is this hatchet business? I didn’t hate her.”
“I know, I know. It was the best metaphor I could come up with. Sorry. So, what caused this sudden flowering of friendship?” I bit my lip and considered as the cabbie weaved in and out of traffic and people rushed for cover, or popped open umbrellas.
“She was really open and honest with me about some things, and I value that, so I decided to put everything else aside. I was being petty and immature. She’s also really funny. Why didn’t you tell me she was funny?”
My question left him floundering for a moment.
“I didn’t want to talk about her because I didn’t want to make you upset. That might have been petty and childish on my part. So I tried to avoid ever discussing her.” I took his hand and folded our fingers together.
“You don’t have to do that. I’m interested. I want to know what you were like back then. I’ve seen pictures but I want to know. Don’t you want to know what I was like as a teenager?”
He squeezed my hand.
“I most definitely want to know what you were like as a teenager. It must be much more interesting than what I was like. My adolescence was boring. Very boring. Nothing to talk about.” I rolled my eyes as the cabbie pulled up to our building.
“This is going to suck,” I said, staring at the rain.
“Here,” Lucah said, shucking off his jacket. We were both going to have to dash. Not that it mattered, because we were just going home. I could change once we got inside, but I disliked getting rained on, even if it was only for a minute. Lucah handed me his jacket to use as a makeshift umbrella and then got out, dashed to my door, opened it, and dragged me across the short distance to the front door of our building.
I stayed dry, but him, not so much. His hair dripped on his face, and his shirt was nearly see-through. I wasn’t complaining. It was a good look for him.
I couldn’t keep my hands off him in the elevator, so it was a good thing we were alone. By the time we got the door unlocked, I had one arm out of his shirt and he was working on my buttons.
“Get a fucking hotel room,” said a voice that made us both freeze, mid-clothes tearing. Oops. I’d pretty much forgotten about Ryder. From the look on Lucah’s face, so had he.
Lucah cleared his throat and let go of my shirt, straightening up as he put his arm back in his sleeve while I tried to re-button my shirt. Lucah had lipstick smeared on his mouth, and I’d ravaged his hair as well.
“Look, I know you guys are all over each other, but please, do it when I’m not here.” There was just one problem. He was always here. That wasn’t his fault, because both his therapist and Lucah didn’t think a job was right for him at this point, but he needed something to do. Preferably something that got him out of the apartment so Lucah and I could fuck each other.
“Sorry, Ryder,” I said, finally getting my buttons done, and readjusting my jacket.
“Whatever, it’s fine. I’m going over to Sloane’s.” I happened to know she wasn’t home from work yet. She’d texted me that she wasn’t going to be able to do dinner, and to order out and start without her.
“Do you have a key?” I asked.
“Yeah, she gave me one and said I could hang out there any time.” Uh, she did? That was news to me. It also seemed like something she should have discussed with Lucah at least.
“You don’t have to leave, Ryder,” Lucah said as Ryder headed for the door.
“No, no. Someone should be getting laid in this apartment, and if it can’t be me, then go ahead.” He walked out and shut the door.
“I think I’m going to go deal with that,” Lucah said, brushing something off my jacket. “I will be right back.”
I let him go and went to slump on the couch. I’d thought the Ryder thing was beginning to settle, but every time I thought that, something else happened. Plus, we had yet to tell him he was coming with us to my parents’ house. Lucah thought it was best to spring it on him at the last minute. I disagreed, but he knew Ryder better than I did.
Maybe we could bring Sloane with us. Mom and Dad would love to see her, and she might be able to keep Ryder on a leash.
I closed my eyes for a minute and debated about going to see if Lucah and Ryder had killed each other, but decided to stay out of it. The brother dynamic was one I wasn’t all that familiar with, not having any brothers of my own.
The door opened a few minutes later, and I propped myself up to see who it was. Lucah. He didn’t have a black eye, so that was good. He didn’t have Ryder with him, either.
“How did it go? Did you solve your issues by wrassling it out?” Lucah laughed at me.
“No, we haven’t done that since we were kids. And I’m pretty sure he could take me now. We were just talking about him getting out of the house more. I’ve kind of had him under house arrest, and I think it’s time to loosen the cuffs a little.”
I completely agreed. There was no reason why Ryder shouldn’t be allowed to leave the house every now and then. I was kind of surprised that he hadn’t already. Maybe he was trying to be good.
“I, uh, also told him about Sunday.”
“What was his reaction?”
“He used ‘fuck’ as several different parts of speech.” Big shocker. “But he said he’d come, so I think it should work out. I was thinking that maybe we could bring Sloane with us since he seems to behave the best when she’s around. Not that that’s saying much, but still.”
I rested my arms on his shoulders.
“This is why I love you. Because I was thinking the exact same thing.”
“Weird. Maybe our brains are absorbing each other’s thoughts. Pretty soon, we won’t even need words. We’ll just KNOW what the other is thinking.” That prospect was both terrifying and kind of cool sounding. I didn’t think it was really possible outside of science fiction, but stranger things had happened.
“So, are you thinking what I’m thinking?” he said, his eyes scanning slowly up and down my body.
“I think I have an idea.”