Sweet Affliction [Sweet Awakenings 4] (Siren Publishing Classic) (30 page)

He couldn’t be…

He was strong. He’d promised her. He…

The internal argument played in her head until she felt a hand touch her shoulder. She swung her head around to see Shelby standing there. Understanding and compassion filled Shelby’s eyes as they looked back at her.

“Nick…he’s…” She stopped herself from finishing the sentence that she’d almost said aloud, not wanting it to be real, as if saying it would make it so.

“
Fine
. He’s fine, AJ,” Shelby assured her.

The heavy weight that had lain on her heart just a minute before suddenly lifted off, relieving her chest and allowing air to move freely in and out of her lungs again.

“Where is he then?”

Rex came up behind his wife and answered the question for her. “They’ve given him some heavy doses of antibiotics, cleaned the wound, and given him something for the pain. He’s upstairs on three now in a room. Resting.”

“He’s resting? Oh God. Did he wake up?”

Shelby took her hand in hers. “For a moment, yes. You were the first thing he asked about when he did.”

“I should have been here. I was there every time he woke up before.”

“Relax.” Rex stopped her. “We told him where you were and that you were fine. That seemed to be all he needed to hear. He fell under the narcotic they gave him seconds afterward.”

Relief washed over her. He was okay. He was getting the medicine he needed so he would stay that way. He was no longer in pain. Thank God, she silently gave gratitude for the knowledge that he would be okay.

The feeling that made her feel so light and grateful left as soon as it arrived. Guilt overcame her.

Jack. Adam. Oh, God. Tamara and Chelsea.

She had been so heartsick over Nick she’d completely forgotten that two men had taken bullets. Their wives had sat by their side as she had Nick. How self-absorbed could she be, that she’d so callously forgotten of the worry and fear they were facing?

“I’m so sorry. I can’t believe I haven’t asked…”

She closed her eyes for a moment and shook her head, angry with herself for forgetting that the two people standing before her to reassure her had two friends whose lives were just as precious to them as Nick’s, maybe more so, and all she could think of was herself.

“Are they okay? Adam and Jack?”

A silent prayer whispered inside her head.
Please let them be all right. Please don’t let Chelsea lose her husband. Please, God, don’t let Tamara and their little boy lose Jack
.

Shelby sighed and turned toward Rex, not answering her and seeming to look to her husband for guidance. She watched curiously as the two of them almost spoke to one another with their eyes, no words needed to be exchanged for them to communicate.

“Adam is out of surgery. His wound was a through and through and didn’t hit anything major. He’s in recovery, and they say he’s going to be fine.”

Rex answered for his wife. Clearly he was the stronger of the two. It was no surprise, she thought. He seemed to tower over her, his size making him seem a giant next to the small frame of his wife.

Worry etched both of their faces, and she was afraid to ask. Nick and she had talked the entire plane ride back to the states. He’d told her all about his family, teammates, Tom Drake—the one who had been killed—and his friends. She knew from the stories he’d told that Rex and Jack were like brothers. Not in the brotherhood of being in the teams together but actual brothers. They were best friends and had an unshakable bond. She held her stomach as it knotted in fear, hoping and praying that all this hadn’t caused the death of Jack, making his wife a widow, his child fatherless.
Please, God, do not take him from his family
.

“And Jack?” She swallowed the nervous lump building in her throat, knowing full well any worry she had didn’t compare in the slightest to what they must be feeling.

“He’s…”

Rex stopped talking, his expression frozen as he looked beyond the hallway to something that caught his eye in the distance.

She and Shelby both turned and looked in the direction where his eyes were locked. Tamara was coming near them, slowly, like she was exhausted. Her expression was haunting. Her once bright and vibrant eyes looked dull and pained.

AJ knew Tamara and Shelby had been best friends for years, but it was Rex who walked toward her first. After a couple steps Tamara flung into his arms. Loud sobs filled the emergency room as onlookers curious to see what all the fuss was about peeked from behind curtains.

“Tamara?” Shelby approached her best friend and husband but stopped when Rex held up a hand to stop her from coming closer.

“Tam…sweetie, I need you to tell me what’s wrong.”

AJ didn’t miss the calm tone of his voice. It was soothing, meant to comfort the sobbing woman in his arms, but the sheer horror in his eyes betrayed the obvious fear he felt.

“The bullet…I can’t…”

AJ’s heart ached for the woman who was crying so uncontrollably she could barely compose herself for longer than a couple of syllables. With every word she spoke it was as if some invisible force was literally shaking the gut-wrenching sobs from her body.

“Shh…I know. I know…Jesus, do I know. But listen to me. I need you to tell me.”

Wanting to make herself useful and return the same comfort Shelby had showed her, AJ put an arm around Shelby and held her close. They were not close. They’d barely just met. It was a gesture, nothing more, nothing less. A gesture that Shelby appreciated, or so it seemed, when she gave her a soft smile of thanks.

It took Rex a few more gentle and calming words before Tamara composed herself enough to form her strangled words into sentences. Finally she was able to explain to him, to them all, that Jack’s wound was bad.

He’d been struck in his right kidney. The vest he was wearing was anything but bulletproof. It was a cheap knock off at best, and the bullet sliced through the synthetic material with ease. He’d lost a lot of blood, dangerously too much. Even though he’d woken up for a short time before leaving the safe house to be transported to the hospital, he hadn’t stayed coherent long.

In surgery they’d removed the bullet and his kidney. He had one good one remaining, and the irony of that statement hit her hard. She thought of her father and how the cancer raged through his body faster than radiation and chemotherapy treatments had been able to counteract, wishing that they could’ve been able to just take out the bad parts, the sick parts so that he could be here with her again.

She focused her attention back to Tamara and the present, not wanting to dwell on the past and what ifs. According to what the surgeon had relayed, Tamara’s husband had crashed on the table. He sprung back to life when they gave him the paddles and didn’t give up after that. The rest of his surgery went routinely. Or as routinely has a bullet and kidney extraction could go.

Jack would be all right, barring any unforeseen complications. His recovery time would be several weeks as his body adjusted to having a hole where a once-functioning organ was stashed away for safekeeping should he ever need a spare or to lend one to a friend.

“So everyone is all right then?”

AJ covered her mouth, surprised at herself for saying it aloud. She quickly tried to cover for her ridiculous statement, not even knowing if she’d meant it in the form of a reassuring question or statement.

“What I mean is…”

“What you mean is, is that it’s a miracle everyone made it out of this alive,” Shelby answered for her.

AJ looked to her side and knew that Shelby sensed her unease. She smiled at the woman who seemed so much braver and stronger than she was.

Did that come over time, she wondered? Did being around these men who were larger than life somehow instill into them a sense of bravado themselves? Did their relationships come with a user’s manual? A guide that told them how to act, how to behave and more importantly, how to endure the intensity that their lives held?

“There you are. I’d wondered what happened to you.” A nurse approached AJ, obviously clueless of the seriousness of the moment.

She was nearly scared for a moment. Her nerves became heightened, and fear clawed at her, wondering if something had gone wrong and Nick was in fact not resting. The nurse’s soft smile reassured her quickly.

“Commander Slater is in Room 312. He’ll be out for a little while, but I didn’t want you to come back and see his empty room and worry.”

The kind woman patted her hand and left as quickly as she’d appeared. Worry? Her? Talk about an understatement. She’d been out of her mind with panic and anxiety.

She took a deep sigh and enjoyed the moment of peace knowing that she had no reason to fear. He was okay. Nick was going to be fine.

She wanted, no needed, to be there when he woke up. The danger was now over, and she wondered if their connection would still be as strong. It hadn’t dawned on her until just then that their chemistry might’ve been sparked by the intensity of the situation they were in. She’d heard of things like that before but couldn’t remember what it was called. A new worry started to nag her at the idea things would be different now that the danger was gone.

She knew her feelings had nothing to do with all they’d gone through. He was everything she’d ever wanted without ever knowing she wanted it. Would he feel the same? Would he still want her? Could he even…love her?

The unanswered question hung in her mind precariously. There was only one way to find out. She finished speaking with the three of them and made her apologies before going off in search of Nick’s room. No matter what happened she would not be sorry. Nick Slater was the best thing that had ever happened to her.

She got on the elevator and pressed the button to the third floor. The elevator doors closed, and for the first time in her life she found herself wanting, truly wanting someone. The love she felt for him was strong, overpowering, overwhelming, and all-consuming. It wasn’t planned, it wasn’t expected, but it was there.

A smile flashed across her face as her mother’s voice danced in her head. It silently whispered to her, “Nothing worthwhile is ever easy, sweetheart.”

Nick opened his eyes to a blinding light that forced him to quickly close them. Slowly he reopened them. The light that once shocked his retinas now was much kinder to him. Looking around the room he saw all the telltale signs of a hospital room. The rhythmic sound of the machine next to his bed told him his vitals must be steady. Confusion set in as he tried to remember what put him here. A peaceful veil seemed to be surrounding him. He felt like he was floating, not so much in the air, but the way he would while lying on his back in the ocean, the gentle waves rocking him as he drifted along the sea.

No more than a moment past before he felt a nervous feeling sink in the pit of his stomach. Something was wrong. Not physically. He had no pain, quite the contrary in fact. Yet something seemed to be missing. He closed his eyes while he tried to focus on the feeling of emptiness that was plaguing him.

Suddenly and with fear he opened his eyes wide.
AJ.
Where in God’s name was she? Bits and pieces of tiny memories flashed through his mind all at once.

Tom Drake. The ambush. The island. Her father. His death. The safe house. The set up. The fire fight.
Oh Jesus
.

The machine next to him started beating rapidly as his blood pressure rose. No longer did it play a rhythmic tune of calm, but instead now sent a chaotic sound through the room. A moment later a female nurse who reminded him of the typical version of a grandmother who bakes cookies and gigantic Sunday dinners ran into the room. She showed first panic and then relief when she saw Nick was awake.

“A…” Nick tried to talk. His voice was raspy, and his throat felt like the Sahara Desert.

“Calm down there, Commander Slater. Let me get you some ice chips. You must be parched. Sit tight, I’ll be right back. Don’t go scaring me like that again.”

The woman was about to leave his bedside when Nick reached out and grabbed her arm.

“A…J.” He managed to get the words out despite now having a single droplet of saliva in his mouth.

“Is that what has you all in a tizzy? She should be back soon.” She placed a reassuring hand on Nick’s arm and smiled at him. “You know she hasn’t left your side once. This was the first time.”

Thank God
.
She is all right.

“There, that’s much better,” she said, indicating how the rapid beating of the machine slowed to a balanced pace again.

“I’ll be right back. You need those ice chips or you won’t be able to say a word to that sweet girl.”

He watched the nurse as she walked out of his room. She had a kind face. One that you would suspect was always smiling. She wore a tight bun on top of her head, had glasses that sat on the tip of her nose, and soft eyes of compassion. He looked at her and couldn’t help but wonder if he was right about her and she had a dozen grandkids who she spoiled incessantly with sweets and goodies.

Any thoughts of the sweet nurse left his mind right quick when he saw AJ in the doorway.