Sweet Chemistry (24 page)

They stood side by side and went through the contract together. Liz explained every step and when they were done, they traded a check for the keys.

“Do I need to wait until the first?” Kate held her breath.

“Mr. Crane told me you could have it a few days early so you can move in now.”

Kate hugged and thanked her before returning to her car.

Her cheeks ached from smiling as she dialed James. It went straight to voicemail, so she hung up. She didn’t want to share her news in a message. She wanted to surprise him, and she wouldn’t have to wait much longer to see him in person. He would be home by six o’clock. Just in time for dinner.

A plan formed in her head, and she got moving so everything would work out. By the time she gathered supplies from her dorm and went shopping, it was four o’clock. Her hands shook as she put the key in the lock. The latch clicked and then Kate was standing inside her new bakery.

She worked for nearly two hours, and when she left everything was in place. The table was set and dinner was in the warming oven.

On her way to James’ apartment, he sent her a text.

“We need to talk.”

“I’m on my way :)” She texted back.

She took the stairs two at a time. James was waiting for her. All the joy inside her died the second she saw his face.

Sleep did not come easy Sunday night. James’ bed was cold and his body ached for Kate. She insisted she shouldn’t stay the night, saying he needed to focus on work. He didn’t know how he was supposed to work when all he wanted was to be with her. It wasn’t going to be easy.

Like all the other spring graduates, she was still a student for five more months. That’s how long it was going to be before they could be together in public. Time hung over his head like a gray cloud. After spending every waking moment with Kate over the long weekend, waiting until May to be with her like that again suddenly seemed impossible. At least they would have winter break together. Maybe they could go away again.

The brisk ride into work didn’t do much to wake him the next morning. The grogginess that comes from a terrible night of sleep lingered no matter how many cups of coffee he drank. Maybe if he saw her before class, he would feel better.

James carried his biochemistry notes with him and made his way to the chemistry majors’ room, where the tables were filled with students and books. He had only walked by the room before, and as he stood in the doorway hoping to see Kate, someone waved, inviting him in.

“Dr. B. Over here.”

James peered around the piles of books and found the source of the voice. It was Angelica.

“I’ve never seen you in here before.” She smiled at him and patted the chair next to her. “You looking for someone?”

With his notes tucked under his arm, he leaned on the back of the chair and nodded to the other students who were sharing her table. James shook his head. “No, just waiting for the copier and thought I’d have a look around.”

“I’m glad you did.” She wound her hair around her finger. “Can I ask you a question about my exam?” She reached inside her backpack before he could answer. “I missed five points on this formula, and I was wondering if I could make it up. Somehow.” She put her hand on top of his.

“I don’t offer extra credit, sorry Angelica.” He was in the process of pulling his hand away when someone touched his shoulder.

“James, may I have a word?” Lloyd’s stare was cold and his lips were set in a firm line.

James held up his notes. “I’m on my way to biochemistry. Can it wait?”

Lloyd narrowed his eyes. “I suppose. I’ll expect you after class.”

James swallowed hard. His boss still had a way of making him shake in his boots. After Lloyd left, Angelica followed James to the classroom, chatting the whole way about her Thanksgiving break.

As the students filtered in, he smiled at Kate. She gave him a casual wave before talking to Tim. They spoke in hurried and hushed voices and Tim hugged her before James began lecturing. Kate barely took any notes and when he dismissed them, she ran out of the room without a backward glance.

The unpleasant task of going to see Lloyd loomed over his head as he made his way to the main office. He couldn’t put it off much longer, since he was anxious to know why Lloyd was so obviously upset.

Lloyd’s office was open, and he was sitting behind his desk. When James stepped inside, Lloyd looked up. “Please close the door.”

With a hesitant step, James closed the door and sat in the chair opposite him. Lloyd got up and sat on the edge of the desk in front of James, towering over him. He was holding a binder in his hands.

“Do you know what this is?”

James shrugged. “A binder?”

“It is the university’s Faculty Handbook. I believe you have a copy.”

“Yes I got one during my orientation.”

Lloyd flipped through the pages, stopping on a page marked with a yellow sticky note. “Are you familiar with article APM zero one five?” Lloyd’s words fell on James, pushing him back in his chair.

“Can’t say I am.”

Whatever Lloyd was talking about, he was dead serious. “Let me educate you. Zero one five is part of the Faculty Code of Conduct. I am especially interested in sharing Part Two: Professional Responsibilities, Ethical Principles and Unacceptable Faculty Conduct.”

Fuck
. Suddenly, James understood with perfect clarity what this meeting was about. Lloyd knew about Kate, and now he was going to lose his job. All the air left James’ lungs.

As if on cue, his phone vibrated in his pocket. It was Kate.

“I’m glad I have your attention.” Lloyd took a deep breath and positioned his reading glasses on the end of his nose. “And I quote…”

James listened to Lloyd drone on and on about the pedagogical relationship between faculty and students, and how important it is to keep the students safe from inappropriate relationships. Of course he had read the handbook before, but the words had never made him nauseous. Until now.

Lloyd took another deep breath and went on. “I think number six on the Types of Unacceptable Conduct list is the most pertinent to your situation…” The words spilled out of his mouth, one after another, forcing James deeper into his seat.

There it was: romantic or sexual relationships. He was finished. Doomed. James gripped the arms of the chair and jumped when Lloyd slapped the binder shut. Lloyd was staring at him, obviously waiting for him to do or say something. He needed to buy time and find out exactly what Lloyd knew. Even though he wanted to run like hell, he straightened his back and attempted to keep his voice as even as possible. “What are you trying to say, Lloyd?” His fingertips turned white as he held onto the chair.

“I thought it was pretty clear. I’m accusing you of having an affair with one of your students.”

Blood pounded in his ears, deafening him. “Based on what evidence?” James’ voice wavered.

“Don’t treat me like a fool!” Lloyd pounded the heel of his hand on his desk. “I see the way she looks at you and touches you. I know all about the
study groups
.” His face scrunched up in disdain.

James frowned. He and Kate had been so careful. “What are you talking about?”

“Angelica!” Each syllable of her name was accompanied by Lloyd’s fist hitting his desk.

The breath he had been holding left his lungs. “I can assure you I have only had completely professional conduct with Angelica. If you are implying she fosters feelings toward me, I cannot stress enough I have no interest in her and have no intention of reciprocating them, nor have I in the past.”

Lloyd narrowed his eyes. “You expect me to believe nothing is going on between you?”

James held his hands up. “Honestly.”

Lloyd started pacing next to his desk. “Believe me, I see the attraction. You’re young, successful, and handsome. But I swear, if you’re lying to me…” He spun to face James again. “I will report you to the Faculty Senate for disciplinary actions so fast it’ll make your head spin.”

“Lloyd. Nothing is going on between Angelica and I.”

“Then why were you so nervous? You turned as pale as a ghost when I read from the manual.”

“Anyone would be nervous sitting across from you while you read out of the Faculty Handbook.” James swallowed hard.

“Consider this a warning. If I find
any
reason to believe you’re breaking the rules of conduct, you can say goodbye to your position here. I’ll be watching you.”

James nodded. His heart jumped with every word and panic settled in deep inside him. He walked back to his office in a daze. His hands were shaking and he couldn’t catch his breath.

Everything Lloyd said was true, except the name of the girl, and it was only a matter of time before he found out the truth. Something had to be done.

James was nauseous by the time he finally rode home. If he avoided Kate for the next five months he could save them both the pain headed their way. Perhaps she would be too busy with her life to notice. He dismissed that idea and faced reality. She deserved honesty. They needed to talk.

He could hear her running up the steps as he stood in the open door.

“What’s wrong?” Kate tried to touch his face but he pulled away.

“Lloyd knows. He knows something is going on, he just had the wrong person.”

Kate frowned. “Wait. What? Wrong person?”

James sighed. His shoulders fell forward as he leaned against the doorjamb. “This afternoon, after biochemistry, he demanded a meeting. He read me the goddamn Faculty Manual section on unacceptable conduct and sexual relationships with students. He
knows
!”

“Oh James. I’m so sorry. Did you get fired?”

“No, because he thought I was having an affair with Angelica, so I could deny it up and down.”

“Angelica’s not quiet about her crush on you.” Kate wrapped her fingers through his and gave him a hopeful smile. “Then everything is okay. We’re safe. We only have a few more weeks.”

James tugged out of her grasp. The hurt on her face sliced through his heart. “It’s only a matter of time. If not now, it’ll be next semester. I’ll lose my job. Everything. No one will hire me after he’s through with me.”

Kate blinked and stared at him with eerily calm eyes. “So this is the part where you tell me we’re through.” She nodded. “I understand. I was stupid to think I could have this.”

“No. You’re—”

“Don’t. Just don’t.” She shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut tight. Her lashes were rimmed with tears.

He clenched his jaw and his head was pounding with the effort of holding his emotions in place. He wanted to hold her, to comfort her, but when he reached out to her she backed away, and then she was running again. Her feet hit one stair after another, and the space between was filled with quiet sobs.

Even when he could no longer hear her running, the sobs persisted.

They were coming from him.

* * * *

The windows of Kate’s car fogged with her breath and her head rubbed against the steering wheel with each sob. It was supposed to be a good day-the greatest day-the day she was finally going to tell James about her bakery. She had spent the better part of the afternoon cooking and setting up a makeshift bed in her new apartment. All for nothing. Her knuckles turned white as she gripped the steering wheel.

After taking a deep ragged breath, Kate started her car and drove back to her bakery. The smell of dinner waiting in the oven did nothing to rouse her appetite. She turned everything off, passed the table set for two, and dragged herself upstairs.

The unlit candles were a painful reminder of the night that could’ve been, so she shoved them all into a cupboard and sat down. The pile of blankets and pillows on the floor welcomed her exhausted body. Eventually, she ran out of tears and fell asleep.

The alarm on her phone woke her the next morning. Her eyes were swollen and ached when she opened them. She was supposed to work in the office today. Right down the hall from James. A sob choked her. She couldn’t run the risk of seeing him.

After taking a few deep breaths, she called Carrie. “Hi Carrie, it’s Kate.”

“Hiya Kate, you don’t sound so good. Are you sick?”

“No, not sick, but I can’t come into work this week. I’m so sorry.” Kate was on the verge of crying again.

“Hey.” Carrie soothed her through the phone. “Don’t worry about it. There are only two more weeks of this semester, and seeing as how it’s your last one, I’m sure you’ve got a lot on your plate.”

“I do. I have more than I can handle right now. I’m so sorry, Carrie. I don’t want to leave you high and dry.” Kate sniffed and wiped her nose.

“It’s quiet around here. Next week might get a little busy, but I’ve got plenty of time to find help. Really Kate, don’t you worry about me. It’s me that’s worried about you! Is it your folks?”

“No, they’re fine, it’s just, um, personal stuff. I just need some time to get myself together. I’ll be okay.” Kate squeezed her eyes shut and tried to believe what she was saying.

“Just promise you’ll come see me before graduation, okay?”

Kate could hear the smile in her voice. “I promise.”

Her conversation with Carrie solved one of her problems. She still had to deal with facing James in class for the next two weeks. Tim might be willing to help, but he would have to know what happened. Meg would also want to know, so she texted them both and had them meet her at the bakery an hour later.

Meg and Tim came in together, right on time, with smiles plastered to their faces. They were obviously not prepared for the cloud of sadness that surrounded her. Neither of them spoke, they only hugged her and waited for her to tell them what happened. They all sat down at one of the tables.

“James broke up with me last night.” Kate took a deep breath and forced herself to move on before she cried again. “Dr. Moore accused him of having an affair with a student, and threatened to fire him. What could he do?”

“He could’ve chosen you.” Meg touched her hand.

“He’s worked for years for this job, I never wanted to come between him and his goals. The worst part is that he didn’t want to wait for me to graduate.” A tear ran down her cheek.