Swoon (20 page)

Steph chewed on her lower lip and looked at me again. “When Lawrence told me about Shane a long time ago… I never forgot it. I’m not even sure why exactly. But it sparked something in me, and I felt some clarity in what I could do that maybe some people couldn’t.”

Another moment of silence. We could all hear the ticking of the grandfather clock in the foyer.

I was impressed.

She shrugged like it was no big deal.

Chapter 21

Steph

W
e were quiet later, walking hand in hand back to Lawrence’s house at sunset. He’d been aloof ever since my rambling on about my new business idea. Shoot, it was barely more than an idea at this point.

“Are you mad at me?” I finally asked, giving his arm a tug.

“What?” He blinked down at me like he’d just noticed I was there. “No. Why would you think that?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. You’re just, you know, not speaking.”

He chuckled and paused midstep to kiss the top of my head. “Just thinking.”

I nodded, feeling not at all more comfortable with his answer as more silence ensued. How was he not aware that I was suggesting he tell me what he was thinking about? I know men complain about not understanding women, but I’m just saying we can’t understand how they don’t get us. It’s so simple.

I cleared my throat. He was going to make me ask. Ugh. “So what are you thinking about?”

He was staring off into the dark, reds and oranges swirling past the rolling hills. “So many things.”

I rolled my eyes. “Dude. Help a girl out. What’s going on?”

He laughed again and led me off the driveway we’d been walking along, down a grassy hill, quietly weaving us through a grove of trees to find a secluded spot along a fence line. He leaned back against the fence, propping his foot behind him. I climbed up to perch on the top rail. His arm came around behind me and his fingers played against my hip. The casual touch made my heart pitter-patter and my stomach flutter.

“It’s been a big weekend,” he finally began. “First you show up on my doorstep looking like you literally ran here. I’ve had the opportunity to give you multiple orgasms with many more promised to come. We got cock-blocked by my sister’s kids. Then by my entire family—”

I shook my head. “When did we get cock-blocked by your family?”

He waved an arm out in front of him. “That whole dinner, fucking family time, was one giant block. I could have been doing you the entire time.”

I laughed and smacked the side of his head. “Okay, okay. Now you sound like Ethan.”

“You have to admit he has a point. Anyway, while at this lengthy, fun-filled family event, I learned some things.”

He was quiet again.

“I’m serious. If you make me ask you what you learned, I’m going to teach you a new form of cock-block.”

“I’m trying to tell you. Stop interrupting.”

He pinched my side, causing me to squirm and almost fall off my perch. He steadied me with the arm that had been resting behind me, then turned to face me, settling himself between my legs. I was high enough up so that my head was a few inches over his, knees high on either side of his waist. His hands had pushed my dress up to accommodate him, and they ran up my bare thighs, finally settling on my hips under the material. Good Lord, I hoped no one in his family decided to go for a stroll. He was acting like it was totally normal to have his hands under my dress during our conversation, but it was making it hard for me to concentrate on his words as my body started to hum and heat up. I took a deep, steadying breath and leaned down to kiss his forehead, like he’d done to me so often. We rested that way for a second before I asked him to keep talking.

“Okay,” he continued. “So first I had a long talk with my dad, who pretty much told me I was an idiot for letting you get away all these years and how much time I had wasted being a pussy. And he more or less said that I can’t listen to you when you start acting crazy.”

“Hey!”

He laughed and shushed me with a kiss. “He also told me to figure out what I wanted and how to make it happen. And not just with you. It’s obvious I want you. But he knows I’m not completely satisfied running the farm here. I’ll always feel like the kid, and it’s just not something I get excited about every morning like you do when you go to work. Or like you did, anyway. While I thought about that all afternoon, wondering what to do and how to do it, you drop this idea that’s apparently been running through your head for a while now about starting your own business. And don’t get me wrong, I’m proud as hell of you, and I think you can do anything you put your mind to. But… why didn’t you tell me?”

The sun was falling fast, dusk turning into dark, but I could still see the glitter in his blue eyes, which were intense and searching.

I cupped his cheek with one hand, my thumb caressing the stubble that lined his jaw. “I didn’t mean to withhold anything from you. It just never came up. It’s something I’ve been thinking about for a while now, and I don’t know, I haven’t gotten too far into a plan yet. I’m still figuring it out.”

His fingers started to make small circles on my hips, moving around and lower, up and over, dangerously close to some pretty sensitive regions. My breath hitched.

“What if we worked on a plan… together?”

I froze. “What do you mean?”

He blew out a breath. “Don’t freak out.” His hands returned to the sides of my hips. “I’m just brainstorming possibilities. Nothing needs to happen right away. But there has to be some sort of way to figure this out. At some point, one of us is going to need to make a decision on where we’re gonna live. One of us, or both of us, will need to move.”

His fingers pressed hard into my flesh when I started to interrupt. “Wait. No freaking out. I’m being reasonable here. I’m not talking today. Or tomorrow. But you wouldn’t have driven your crazy ass all the way over here if you hadn’t been entertaining some thoughts of the future. Let’s not beat around the bush here. I plan on our lives intertwining forever. It can happen slow or fast, that’s up to you. But it’s already happening, and I’m not going to sit here and pretend it’s not just to protect your nerves. So speaking reasonably, like adults, we will eventually need to come up with a plan. I love your idea. And I want to do it with you. I’ve been looking for something that I could have passion for and be inspired by. This farm, it’s my family’s legacy. You and I will always have a place here with no worries about where we live or what we do.”

He gestured behind me. “We have a herd of horses just sitting around with nothing to do. We could potentially run an entire operation here. But—and this is a big one—we will have no privacy, or very little. We would spend every Sunday with my family, they’ll walk into our house without knocking. They’ll nose into our business. I’m not sure that anything here would feel like… ours. An alternative is simply moving somewhere else. And doing it ourselves. Starting fresh. And I’m game for going anywhere as long as you’re there.”

I sighed. “That’s a lot to think about, Lawrence.” I shifted a little on the fence, the wooden rail starting to dig into my behind. “Leaving aside the fact that I think it’s too soon to even be having this discussion, I’ll say this. The option of getting to start my own business on an existing farm with a house all ready, horses available and property workable… Well, it’s really tempting. There’s security in the idea. It sounds easier. Too easy though. And in my experience, things don’t work out that way. Personally, I’d rather start fresh. Remember Bob, from Charlottesville?”

Lawrence nodded.

“He may be interested in some kind of partnership in a business. Or investing or something. He has the connections for clientele and has been looking around his area for facilities. However it worked, it would be a true business deal, with good legal contracts and such. If I do this, if we do this, we’d have to move down there, and we’d be locked into that area for a long time. It’s a big commitment and move. So if we’re going to do this… That’s something you have to decide if you’re on board for.”

Lawrence grinned at me. “See, that was a completely reasonable talk, huh?” He patted my thigh gently, sending tingles up my spine. “I’m game, queenie. We’ll sort it all out in time.”

I nodded my head and smiled back, not really sure we’d worked anything out but feeling a little lighter that we could have a serious discussion without falling apart.

“Can we be done with all the talking now?” I pleaded. “I can’t take any more
f
words. Future and family and”—I shuddered—“feelings.”

He laughed and let his hands begin to wander again, around to fondle my ass, fingers lightly tracing between my cheeks.

“No feelings, huh?”

He shifted closer and I bent my head to capture his lips in mine, my hands gripping his neck tightly. He robbed me of breath, his tongue tangling with mine in a long, languid kiss. We pulled away slowly until his lips were only brushing mine, then they moved across my cheek to kiss down my neck. His hands continued to tease around under my dress, and I wriggled forward slightly, kicking off my flip-flops and wrapping my legs around his waist to pull us tightly together.

He took my hands from around his neck and placed them on either side of my hips to balance on the fence rail. I leaned back to look in his eyes and at the cocky smirk on his face. His hands caressed down my legs, tightly gathering the fabric of my dress and bunching the material up farther. He took one knee and then the other, removing them from his sides and pushing them apart. I braced my bare feet on a lower board and started to smile, eyebrows raised high.

“What, precisely, do you think can occur here without causing injury, or without being caught by your family?”

His smirk widened into a grin. “No one will come by. We’re very well hidden.” He raised a brow. “Unless you scream. Then they may hear. Sound does travel significantly.”

Without giving me a chance to respond, he lowered himself to kiss the inside of one knee, then the other, keeping his eyes trained on mine as he worked his way farther up my thighs. The front of my dress was pushed high up my waist, probably stretching it, hopefully not tearing and ruining it. My eyes rolled to the back of my head when his fingers teased between my legs, his touches faint, always moving just shy of where I needed him. When his lips followed suit, I almost fell backward off the fence. When his tongue flicked out, I forgot all about the discomfort of the rail digging into my ass and concentrated on holding myself steady, feeling the white paint chip under the pressure of my fingernails. I breathed in and out, trying to keep my moans to a minimum and failing miserably. I was, once again, completely helpless before him, balancing precipitously, both literally and figuratively, my chest rising and falling, faster and faster.

I watched his outline in the darkness as he started moving faster, flicking his tongue shockingly fast but still lightly, his fingers feathering over my skin, torturously teasing me into a long, body-quaking orgasm I felt from deep inside. White lights dotted my vision as my stomach clenched and my body convulsed. A sheen of sweat coated my body, my muscles seized in place from the effort of holding myself up, aftershocks coursed through my system—all of it made me desperate to have him actually inside me, as close as we could get. I watched hungrily as Lawrence straightened, pressing kisses along the insides of my thighs before he stood, stepping close and wrapping my legs around him once more. He devoured me in a kiss, the taste erotic and somehow sensual. His arms lifted under my hips, peeling me off the fence and laying me down in the grass. My ass was bruised and I stretched my legs out to shake some sensation into them. My nails were chipped and my knuckles were sore from my grip on the wood. And still I was frantic for more, arching my hips up to encourage him to finish what he’d started.

“You guys better not be doing what I think you’re doing!” A voice rang out from beyond the trees. “Can’t you make it back to your own house?”

I froze, Lawrence’s body shaking in mirth over mine.

“Go home, Tessa!” he called out, laughing into my neck.

I smacked his head.

“Well hidden, huh?” I forcibly kept my voice at a whisper. “Oh my gosh, I can never show my face in front of your baby sister ever again!”

He stood and pulled me to my feet, adjusting what must have been an uncomfortable, raging hard-on in his grass-stained slacks.

“Well, that confirms it,” he said as I walked on wobbly legs to retrieve my shoes.

I turned in question.

“We are not living here. Ever. Fresh start it is.”

I shook my head, laughing as he took my hand again and pressed a kiss to my palm before leading us back to his house.

“Fucking cock-blocks,” he muttered under his breath, and a fresh wave of giggles came over me.

* * * *

Lawrence

I groaned and rolled over, one hand blindly searching for the warmth beside me. It landed on the smooth skin of Steph’s back, and I traced down the slope to the dip in her spine. I pried open my eyes when I reached the crease of her ass, because who wouldn’t wanna see that. Propping myself on one elbow, I watched as goose bumps rose across her flesh while my fingers brushed between her cheeks. I thought back to Ethan and Lissa’s wedding, to the drinking game, and then I was lost in thought, wondering if she’d ever let me take her into that uncharted territory. It’s not my fault. I’m a guy and I just wanted… all of her.

I pushed the sheets down to expose her further, sucking in a breath when I revealed a huge, deep purple bruise shaped like the top of a wooden board.

“My ass is so sore,” Steph mumbled into her pillow.

“Oh, babe.” I couldn’t help but laugh. “This is terrible. Why didn’t you tell me?”

She waved a hand without moving anything else. “I didn’t care at the time.”

I leaned over and feathered kisses along the mark, loving the way she squirmed beneath me. “Was it worth it?”

“Mmhmm,” she mumbled. “What time is it?”

“Quarter till five.” I continued pressing kisses.

“In the morning?” She grumbled.

I chuckled. “I have a full day ahead. Vet coming, client meetings. So I need to get going. You can stay here as long as you like or come down to the barn if you want.”

She sat up, not bothering to cover her nudity. Pushing her hair off her face, she said, “No. I should get going.” Her eyes lingered on my chest, and her fingers reached out to trace the outline of my muscles, making them tighten in anticipation. One nail trailed down to my navel, then lower. She was smirking when she brought it back up, then traced my tattoo. “I feel like I should salute you every time I see this.”