Tab Bennett and the Inbetween (7 page)

“Let me see you,” he said, stopping my hands from covering my breasts. “I want to see how beautiful you are.”

“You are. You’re beautiful,” I answered.

“Let me see all of you.” He reached under my skirt, rubbing his hand against me through the delicate lace of my panties before he tugged them off of me. His finger teased against me, not inside, but close.

He laid me on the couch and knelt over me, looking down.

I looked into his eyes – a whirlpool of blue and deeper blue, blending and crashing together – while I undid the button and zipper of his pants. “I don’t know what I’m doing,” I said as I pulled them low on his hips, my fingers brushing against his swollen length, holding him in my hand. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“God help me if you did.”

Just a layer or two deeper than the toe curling delight I felt as he began to kiss his way across my stomach, I could sense something. Some doubt. It was hard to focus on – everything except Alex was hard to focus on – but it was unmistakably there.

I drifted somewhere between pleasure and uncertainty. It wasn’t like me to behave this way. I moaned as his teeth grazed my hipbone, moving lower still.

But then there it was again. Something I couldn’t quite put my finger on, nagging at me. “Did you answer my question? Why do I want you so bad?”

He kissed my knees, first one and then the other, then the tender skin just above.

“You’re enchanted,” he said in a whisper that teased along the inside of my thigh. I was enchanted by him. Anyone would have been. It was impossible not to be. His tongue flicked against me, just once, and I gasped. “I’m enchanted,” I agreed through a sigh.

He sat up abruptly, staring at me from what suddenly seemed like a huge distance away. Not this again.

“Did I do something wrong?” I asked

“No.” He scoffed at the idea. “You’re perfect.”

“Then why did you stop?”

“There’s an enchantment in place and I just realized you have no idea what that means. I should tell you before we go any further.”

“What does it mean?” I laid one arm over my breasts and felt around for my bra with the other. Not that I could have put it back on gracefully, but it would have been nice to have the option.

“Promise me you won’t over react,” he cautioned.

“I won’t.”

“You will.” He handed me my shirt. “But try to let me explain before you do. You see, amongst our people, in situations like this, when marriages are arranged for political alliances instead of love, it’s not entirely uncommon for an enchantment to be placed on those involved.” He noted my blank stare and added, “To ensure a felicitous match.” He frowned when I shook my head. “A simple, magical spell is laid on the couple to help create an atmosphere of exultant, or perhaps jubilant is a better word...”

“Are you saying it makes us horny?”

He looked relieved. “Horny as hell, yes. Or at least that seems to be how this particular enchantment is working. I find it hard to believe that this is exactly what Our Mothers had in mind when it was placed, but there’s no denying the result. Even now while you’re glaring at me in an obviously angry way, I am finding it hard to keep myself from kissing you.”

“Oh.” All the anger rushed out of me and talking seemed like a huge waste of time. I lay back against the couch pillows and opened my arms to him. “Where do you want to kiss me?”

“Everywhere.”

A short, sharp knock at the door stopped him from making good on the promise.

 “I’m going to answer that. You stay back.” I took a deep breath and stood up, pulling my skirt back into place. He looked at me and then at the door, awaiting further instructions. “This is ridiculous.”

Alex stepped back to let me pass. I’m sure I’d have jumped right back on top of him if we’d so much as brushed pinky fingers. Things were better on the other side of the sofa. It was maybe fifteen feet between us but it was enough distance for me to get my head together a little. At the very least I seemed able to have coherent thoughts over there. Mostly coherent anyway.

When I opened the door the porch was empty. I heard something rustling in the trees. It occurred to me that I should have looked before I opened the door – for all I knew the yard was lousy with dark elves. I giggled at the ridiculousness of it.

“What’s so funny, Princess?” I looked up and saw Robbin leaning against his truck at the end of my driveway. He held out his hand, palm up. “I found something that belongs to you.”

I skipped down the stone path unaware of the cold stones beneath my bare feet. His smile was different, guarded. But it was a smile. “You look flushed.”

I couldn’t exactly discuss the reason for my rosy glow. “Yeah, well…yeah.”

All the ease that comes with knowing someone, with loving someone, for a long time was missing between us. It was lost amongst the sofa cushions with my bra. He was probably wishing he hadn’t come. I was wishing he’d called first. It was an awkward moment for both of us.

“I don’t want anything to be different.” For a long time after, when I thought about this moment in my head, I always said something better, something more profound and about a million times less obvious.

“But it is.”

 I couldn’t deny that. I’d done enough to hurt Robbin already that day without adding lying to my list of offenses.

“Anyway, I found this for you.” He held out his hand again; my engagement ring was in his palm tied to a thin velvet ribbon. I looked at him, not sure what he wanted me to do. He nodded toward it, offering it to me again, only to close his fingers around it just before I could take it. We both knew I wasn’t strong enough to pry it from his hand if he didn’t want to give it to me. He gave me a shy half-smile and opened his palm. The diamond sparkled in the porch light.

 “I wanted you to know there’s an enchantment in place that makes you basically untouchable to anyone but him too. That’s why we never…you and I never…even though I wanted to. Even though I wanted you so bad I couldn’t sleep at night.” He stopped talking and for a minute I could feel him fighting to control his anger at the situation. Finally he took a deep breath and continued, “It makes sense though. You’ve belonged to each other since before you were born. I suspect you’ll have your Homecoming with him eventually. You haven’t yet, right?”

“I don’t think so.”

He nodded and slipped the velvet ribbon over my head. I could see the effort he was putting into sounding light hearted when he said, “This was kind of a waste of money, huh?” He picked up the ring and looked at it for a moment before he let it fall against my chest again. “I knew he was coming for you. Hell, I knew when he was coming. I guess I just wanted to know what you’d say if I asked.” He laughed. “I’m sorry about it now, you know? I’m sorry because I think I’ve made this a lot harder for you than it had to be. I was being selfish. I should have been your friend like I was supposed to. Only that.

“But it’s still your ring, right? I figure you deserve to keep it after all this. You can wear it if you want. Or you can toss it in your jewelry box and forget it. Whatever you want. You’re the princess, right?”

I put my hand over the ring protectively and a smiled skidded across his face. It didn’t last long.

I wanted to say a lot of things that were intended to make him feel better but would have ended up making us both feel worse. I was aware of Alex looking out at us even though I couldn’t see him. I am sure Robbin knew he was there too. “Thank you for bringing my ring.”

“I only live to serve,” he said as he bowed.

“Don’t do that.”

The wind was picking up and clouds covered the moon like a lace shawl. My improperly buttoned blouse wasn’t enough against the crisp October night. I knew Robbin’s body would be warm and I wished he would hold me. The night before, that afternoon even, I would have put myself in his arms and slipped my hands into his coat pockets. But that seemed impossible. I was afraid to risk it; I didn’t think I could bear to have him turn me away. And there was Alex to think of too, watching us from inside the house.

His voice was soft when he said, “I’m just kidding, Princess.”

“No you’re not.”

He glanced at the window and then pulled me against him in one quick movement. He wrapped his arms around me. “I’m not allowed to love you anymore.” He tangled his fingers in my hair and held me tight against his chest. “But I still love you.”

 “I love you too.”

Just as quickly as he grabbed me, his moment of weakness ended and he let me go. I looked over my shoulder at the house. I’m sure we both saw the curtain move back into place. Robbin laughed that bitter laugh again. “He’s in there.”

I expected some reaction as he registered my flushed face and improperly buttoned blouse. Maybe he’d ball his hands up into fists or his eye would twitch. Something. Some small sign. But Robbin didn’t move at all.

“You’re barefoot. You should get back inside.” His voice was controlled.

“I don’t feel cold.”

“That’s because frostbite is setting in. Go inside.” His eyes darted towards the house. There was no movement at the window this time but I knew – we both knew – that Alex was waiting for me.

“Can we talk tomorrow?”

He looked at the sky and sighed. I reached up and touched his face, pulling him back to me. Trying to anyway. I felt him leaning into my touch even as I saw his reluctance. Then he gently pushed my hand away.

His voice was hollow when he finally spoke. “I think it might be better if maybe…I don’t know. Maybe not tomorrow. Maybe we need a while just to …you know, be apart.”

I squeaked out a pathetic little “Oh.”

“I’m sorry,” he said.

“You don’t owe me an apology.”

“You have to understand, it’s not that I don’t want to be with you; I do. Being with you is the only thing I want. I just can’t talk to you. I can’t look at you. I can’t bear to look at you knowing that you’ve been in that house with him all night. I’m not blind or stupid.”

“You know I would never do this to you of my own free will.”

“That doesn’t make it easier. It doesn’t change the fact that you were with him just now or that shirt is buttoned wrong. I can’t stand that he can be with you in a way that I never could—even though he’s basically some stranger and I’ve loved you for a third of your life. But hey, that’s my problem, right? You belong to him now and I’m going to have to deal with it.”

“I don’t belong to him. I don’t belong to anyone.”

He scoffed. “You’re going to be queen; trust me when I tell you that from now on you belong to everyone but yourself. You’re going to have to make your peace with it. You and Alexander are a done deal. To We of the Light you’re already married. We’re done, you and me, and it’s better if we just let this….” His hand sliced slowly through the air in a flat line.

“End?”

He looked at the sky again, looked anywhere to avoid my eyes. “Just let this end.”

“You’ve already given up on me.” The realization hit me hard.

He shrugged. “Because I know what will happen if I don’t.”

I spun on my heel, ready to run back to the house but Robbin caught my hand and pulled me back with a tug; my body slammed against his as his mouth came down on mine. It was an angry kiss – full of sadness and tainted with goodbye. I loved him so much; he was so familiar, so dear. I sighed for all the time we’d wasted.

He pulled away from me he nodded towards the cottage. “I’ll wait here until you get inside. Lock the door. Both locks.”

Without another word I turned and ran up the walk. I heard the engine of his truck roar to life just as soon as the second lock clicked shut.

“I want the enchantments broken, and I want them broken now.” Mrs. Cleveland, Pop’s secretary, trailed behind me like a comet’s tail as I marched into Pop’s office. Barging in and shouting were not part of my normal routine and she was clearly aghast at my bad manners. If it had been anyone else, under any other circumstances, she would already have called security.