Tainted Love (Book 1) (25 page)

I don’t know when,
or how I fell asleep, or how long I had been asleep for; but I wake up wrapped in Ben on the chaise out on the balcony. I ease gently out of his hold and am successful at not waking him. In the bedroom, I find Simone and Rachel asleep on the bed and I wake them.

“What happened?” I finally ask.

“You were almost raped at the party,” Simone answers, with a puzzled look. “Don’t you remember?”

I go pale.
Raped
? So…
not
alcohol poisoning then.

“Dylan,” I whisper in an “ah-ha” tone. I may not remember the details of what happened, but I remember leaving with him after drinking the beer he offered and nothing after that. It is safe to deduce, then, that Dylan drugged me and tried to rape me.
That bastard!

Simone goes on to tell me how Ben came in and saved me. “How he knew where you were is beyond me. He wasn’t even supposed to get back until Saturday
afternoon,” Simone recollects.

But I know how he knew. Good old Simon, always looking out for me.

“He was livid, Sullivan. He almost fired me on the spot. I think he’s still mulling it over in his mind.” I sense despair in Simone’s voice and catch fear in her eyes. Something else happened.

“What else happened that you’re not telling me, Simone?” I probe, wanting to know every detail.

She shudders before answering, “Mr. Hayes beat the living crap out of them.”

“Th-them?” I stutter.
What the heck?

“Three of them, Sullivan.” She grasps my hands as they shake, while Rachel caresses my back. “One of them has a broken jaw – the Dylan guy. Mr. Hayes dragged you out of that frat house in bra and panties. You were unconscious.”

I bristle at her words.
Oh, my God.
What have I done? I can just imagine the media frenzy over this. And…the lawsuits.

“Can you give us a moment, ladies?” Ben had re-entered the room without us noticing. He is staring at me with his hands in his pockets. He stands majestic as the light from outside glows around his figure like an aura.

I gasp and my hand catches my throat as I have a revelation. My dream. He’s the one in my dreams; the light shining in the darkness.

Rachel shoots me a quizzical glance. “Are you okay?”

“Yes,” I pant. I know she doesn’t believe me, but she gets up and leaves with Simone anyway.

I rise from the bed, still shaken by my revelation. I want to tell him thank you, but my throat is too dry.

Ben’s lithe grace, as he walks over to me, is dazzling and I am almost knocked off balance when he grasps my head and waist and kisses me deeply, pouring all of his emotions into it. Regret, relief, anger, sadness, happiness, fear, desire…I feel it all.

“Goddamn it, Sullivan!” he curses, pulling away from me. I hold on to one of the posts on the bed to steady myself as the butterflies ignite in my stomach and threaten to fly away with me. He has such an overwhelming effect on me sometimes.

He reaches for me again, gripping my neck to hold me in place as he glares at me with those murky green eyes of his. “You could have died,” he says slowly and sternly. “You drank too much and the drug, mixed with the alcohol, created a deadly mixture.”

Tears slide down my cheeks as he speaks. His eyes glisten. Is he about to cry? I grab him to me and I squeeze him with everything I’ve got, pain and all. “Thank you, Ben. And…I’m
so sorry.”

Ben tenses in my grasp. His hands form fists at his side as though he is restraining himself from touching me. I let him go, feeling rejected, and step back from him, returning my hold to the post.

“You say you know that men like me like order and routine; in other words, control,” he speaks, his eyes trained on me. “Yet, for all intents and purposes, you have done everything to disrupt that.”

I have.

“I told myself that I would leave you alone, but here I am, like a glutton for punishment. You’ve fucked me up so much, Sullivan. I can’t…I can’t get you out of my system.” He closes his eyes, shaking his head violently.

“I’m sorry.” That is all I can muster to say at this point. Besides, what do you say to all of that?

“You pissed me off so much on Wednesday night,” Ben continues. “And then for me to come find you having a seizure on a bed in your bra and panties…I went off,” he growls, doubling his fists. Obviously, he is still angry. “I need control, Sullivan. But I can’t seem to get it with you.”

He stands away from me, but I feel his anger pulsating through the
atmosphere, like emanating waves of heat. He is on the edge. The smallest mistake will make him lose his composure. I have to give him back control; the control I stole from him the moment I took his business card, wrote my contact information on it, and left him standing in the ladies’ room.

I loosen my grip on the post and approach him tentatively. He backs up a fraction and my heart twists. I am breaking him. Trying to gather my thoughts and courage, I take a deep breath in and release it heavily. This is make-or-break time.

“Hit me,” I tell him, my voice softer than I want it to be.

Ben glowers at me, his eyes shooting me a nasty glare. “What?” he baulks.

I clear my throat to sound more resolute and I say with much more force, “Punish me.”

A harrowed look shadows Ben’s face as he searches mine.

“You say you want c-control,” I fumble a bit, pausing.
I have to do this…I have to give him this…He needs it,
I tell myself.

“You say you want control,” I say more convincingly. “And I’m giving you that control over my body.”

His breath catches audibly and his eyes widen. His chest heaves and his nostrils flex to accommodate his labored breaths.

“I don’t…” He swallows then continues, “I don’t wish to hurt you, Sullivan. I am not like that.”

“I don’t want you to hurt me, Ben.” I take his hand and I wrap it around my neck then slide it down to my breasts and around to my behind. “Punish me.”

Ben hisses as he rounds my ass, gripping it tightly. I groan against his chest, missing his touch. I pull away from him and he straightens, steeling himself once again. I slide the nightgown off my shoulders and let it pool around my feet. I am completely naked when I crawl onto the bed.

On hands and knees, facing away from him, I bid him, “Spank me, Ben.”

He bunches his hands at his sides, clenching his teeth, closing his eyes; visibly warring with himself.

“Please,” I beg. “I need this.
You
need this.”

When he opens his eyes, they’re on fire. His eyes flare an intensity that makes my core clench. I watch him with carnal interest as he pads toward the double doors. He clicks the lock and with that, my fate is subject to
his whims.

He doffs his shirt, revealing his taut chest and that oh so sexy tattoo over his right pectoral. I bite my bottom lip, hungry for him.

“Understand this: you do
not
top from the bottom with me,” he says in a stern, commanding voice; sending pleasurable zings through my core. I nod, too afraid that a moan will trip from my lips.

“Are you sure about this, Sullivan?” His voice rumbles, running through me like an electric charge.

“Yes,” I pant, my light skin flushing crimson. I am so hungry for Ben that the slightest touch will send me over the edge.

Ben growls and approaches me like an animal. He circles my ass with his hand and places a light kiss on it. I shudder at contact, my core clenching and watering.

“Do you have a safe word?” he breathes.

I don’t have to think about it. “Adonis,” I reply, my voice low, dripping with salacious need.

Ben pauses and I hear him chuckle. Then, he slips two fingers inside me, working them lazily.

“That’s my name, love,” he whispers.

“You start me, Ben…” I begin, panting headily. “And you…can end me.” My voice is but a deep tremor when I speak, surely not my own. I am so hungry for him, I can hardly conceal the carnality lacing my speech. I need him more than I’ve ever needed anyone else.

Ben stills once more, possibly taking in what I’d just said. Before I can ask what is wrong, he lunges his fingers deep into me, digging his way to my sweet spot. I moan loudly, gripping the sheets beneath me.
That feels sooo good.

“Do you know what you do to me, my sweet girl?”

“I drive you crazy?” I whimper, questioningly.

“You don’t sound sure,” he lures, pounding deep into me.

“I drive you crazy!” I shout, moaning as he starts rubbing my starved clit.

“Yes,” he purrs. “You do.”

Ben’s fingers disappear and before I know it,
wham!
He slaps my ass. I feel the sweet sting and my body sings with pleasure. I bellow a moan needing to feel the sensation again and he obliges me, caressing the spot he slapped then slapping me again.

“Ben!” I groan, grinding against his punishing palms.

“Keep still,” he orders through gritted teeth, caressing then slapping my ass yet again. He thrusts his fingers inside me and rubs my clit simultaneously.

My stinging behind and his ministrations create such a heady mix that I collapse into a climax, pounding the bed as I scream helplessly into the sheets.

“You have a glorious ass, Sullivan,” Ben chokes out, his voice thick with arousal. How can he stand it, not taking me, when his very voice tells such a desperate tale? Surely he has to throw control to the wind and ravage me at any minute.

But Ben is no
t finished. He scoots me back to my knees and swats my ass hard. This time, it’s pain that I feel. Then, it’s his mouth on me, eating away at my quivering center.

“Oh, God. Please just fuck me, Ben. I can’t stand it,” I plead, my arms and legs trembling, about to fall into another orgasm.

His palm connects with my stinging ass again. “What did I say?” he growls. Oh, yeah, topping from the bottom. “I will stop when I’m satisfied.” Ben dips his tongue into my dripping core and tongue-fucks me to another orgasm.

But still he’s not through.

Ben squeezes my ass and slaps me twice in quick succession, both hitting the apex of my thighs, sending me over the top yet again. I fall on the bed, my legs a gelatinous mess.

If Ben keeps this up, I may have to safeword. My ass is stinging, my body singing with pleasure, my mind in a daze, my legs are Jell-O, and my pussy, sore.
These endorphins are firing through my system like an Uzi. I don’t know if I can take much more.

And to my horror, he isn’t through. Dragging me off the bed, Ben stands me up then bends me over.

“Reach your hands over your head and grab onto the sheets,” he commands in a hot, raspy voice. His voice prickles my awareness and my core clenches in response.
Okay, so maybe I can go again.

I reach up and grab the sheets as Ben spreads my legs. He hits me hard once more and this time tears prick my eyes.
Shit that hurt.

“I am going to fuck you hard, Sullivan. This will be quick. I’ve been hard since you said you wanted me to have control of your body. Do I?” Ben
asks, his voice an arousing bass.

“Yes,” I rasp. Right now, he fucking owns me. I
am willing to say anything, do anything for him at this point, because frankly, I am lost in him. I. Am.
His
.

Ben plunges into me, a tortured moan escaping him. He pounds me mercilessly, groaning loudly, breathing harshly. Over and over and I am utterly spent, coming with every thrashing stroke
in my sex.

“No more,” I beg. It has only been five minutes and I can’t stand anymore. The pleasure is just too much

“Take it all,” Ben grounds out.  I whimper as I build again.

“This is
my
punishment to give,” he mumbles as he slaps my behind hard and caresses it in succession.

Ben is ruthless, ferocious; a beast, wild and hungered. He is pained. Starved of me. Robbed of control because of me. And I am giving it back to him by willing TO him my body.

As I climb higher, I almost pass out. I am exhausted. I don’t think I can handle another toe-curling orgasm; I would simply die from the immense pleasure of it. I want to safeword, desperately, but I know how important it is for him to regain control; control I take from him constantly with my precocious personality and desire to challenge him at every turn. He needs to possess me, and me safewording would defeat that purpose. So I soak up the pleasure that seems more like punishment now.

“Fuck, Sullivan. Squeeze me. Squeeze that tight
little pussy around my cock,” Ben implores, gripping my hips and slowing his drives.

I gather as much strength as I can find and clamp down on his rigid length. Ben lets loose a strained moan and picks up the pace, launching into me with hard lunges before stiffening and coming violently
inside of me.

“Ah, fuck!” he groans loudly, pumping me full of his warm liquid.