Take My Hand (20 page)

“But they
do in America,” Rachel said slowly as if she was talking to a small child.

“But we
live in England.”

“And
he’s
from America, dipshit.” Shaking his
head as if resigning himself to the fact this conversation was lost on his
pickled brain, Jared took another swig from his bottle.

I looked
around the kitchen and sighed. You couldn’t see the countertops for all the
pans, half-chopped veg and food wrappers littering the chipped white surface.
Little did I know then that when I headed to the oven to check on the
over-priced bird, things were about to get even worse.

“Oh for God’s
sake, Rach! You didn’t turn the bloody oven on!” She squinted her eyes and bit
down on her bottom lip.

“Um…
oops?
” I threw the tea-towel I had in my
hand to the floor and stomped into the living room in a full-on childish
tantrum.

“I can’t
believe they’re not taking this seriously,” I grumbled when I heard Dexter
follow me into the room. I knew it was him because I could hear Rachel and Jared
in fits of laughter in the kitchen. “I wanted it to be so perfect for you.”

“Come
here,” Dexter said, spinning me around to face him and bringing me into his
chest. “Every day I spend with you is perfect. And the fact you even thought to
look into Thanksgiving? Well, that’s probably the sweetest thing anyone’s ever
done for me.” Looking up to judge the sincerity on his face I was left smiling
like a lovesick teenager. Well I guess technically that’s exactly what I am -
I’m not twenty for another three months. “Besides,” he added, “I can’t stomach
turkey.” After swatting him on the shoulder I reached up on my tiptoes and
planted a light kiss on the tip of his nose.

“Pizza?” I
asked - resigning myself to the fact my Thanksgiving dinner was a Thanksgiving
disaster.

“Only if I
can get extra peppers.”

“You can
have whatever you want. It’s your birthday remember?” I teased – seeing
the funny side of Jared’s drunken stupidity this time. Dexter breathed a small
laugh before sweeping me from the floor and spinning me around several times,
making me squeal. Mid-air, I called through to the kitchen to ask who wanted
pizza, made a mental note of the order and begged Dexter to set me down so I
could phone the local takeaway.

Yet again,
as if by magic, Dexter had managed to drag me out of a sulk – leaving me
unable to remember what was bothering me in the first place.

**********

By 6 PM
Rachel and Jared were sprawled across opposite ends of the couch snoring away,
leaving me and Dexter with the armchair to share between us. I was sat on his
lap and he had both arms around me, cradling me close to him.

“You want
to stay at mine tonight?” Dexter whispered into my hair. “I have something for
you remember?” I’d forgotten all about that. When he told me earlier I was too
busy fretting over the stupid food I’d spent the best part of a week’s wages
on.

“Give it to
me now,” I demanded playfully.

“We need
to be alone when I give it to you.” Oh. Wow. My heart began to race - thrashing
against my ribs so violently it was almost painful.

“But you
came here to give it me this morning?” I contradicted with a dubious cock of
the eyebrow.

“
No,
” he said slowly. “I said
I had something for you. I don’t believe I stipulated when I was planning to
give it to you.” He was teasing me and I couldn’t help but smile. The feeling
alive thing I was talking about? This was it… this fuzzy, giddy sensation
bouncing around my insides. It’s the only feeling I can focus on –
everything else in the entire world seems insignificant when I’m this close to
Dexter.

“Then what are we waiting for?” I said eagerly, jumping from his knee.
Smiling wickedly he stood up to follow, pinching my bum on his way to the door.

I asked if I could drive, feeling too stuffed full of Meat Feast pizza
to put the effort into holding on for dear life on the back of his bike, and
much to my amazement, he agreed. I considered leaving a note for Rachel but
then decided she and Jared probably wouldn’t surface until at least lunch time
tomorrow and I’d be home by then.

So, after throwing my jacket over my arm and stuffing my phone into my
bag, I grabbed my keys from the hook behind the door and led Dexter outside
towards my car.

Dexter

The
night I’d been planning for so long was
finally here. Tonight I was going to give Emily the very last part of me. I was
going to tell her I loved her. Deep down I’ve known for a long time but I had
to be certain that’s what it was. I had to be absolutely positive this ache
– no, this gut wrenching freakin’ pain in my chest – I felt
whenever I thought of her was love. Hell I still don’t know for sure – I
have no experience of it so why would I? All I know is the thought of life
without her in it makes me not even want to attempt living it anymore. So yeah,
I’m gonna go with my gut and say that’s love.

Now
before you go calling the psyche ward on my ass I’m not suicidal. I’m not
saying I’d top myself without Emily, just that’d I’d be so damn miserable I
doubt I’d do anything but carry out the necessary functions in order to
survive. And that’s not exactly living.

She
told me she loved me a couple of weeks ago. I’m pretty sure it was an accident
so I pretended like I’d not heard her because I couldn’t say it back. I just
wasn’t ready. I just wasn’t 110% certain that this overpowering vice around my
chest was the word I’d always thought to be overused and stupid. But now I’m
shitting it because she’s not said it again since and I’m worried I’ve either
left it too long and she’s slowly starting to give up on me ever saying it
back, or it genuinely was an accident and she regrets saying it as much as I
regret
not
saying it.

Fuck,
I’m rambling. I’ll shut up now.

Emily
was taking a shower when my cell rang. It was Aunt Sarah and my heart sank the
second I saw her name flashing on the screen. I didn’t want to receive the news
I’m perpetually expecting. Especially not tonight. I know you don’t know why,
but believe me just thinking that
 
-
considering how inappropriate the timing would be even for a second - makes me
a self-centered fucking asshole.

“Hey,
sweet cheeks. How is she?” I answered nervously. I was
always
nervous when I asked that question.

“No
change. Though I think she misses your voice. She keeps picking up the book you
always read to her.” An intense silence followed while I fought desperately to
swallow my guilt. As always, Aunt Sarah knew not to push me and I think once
she realized I wasn’t…
couldn’t
respond,
she changed the subject.

“So,
how’s things going over there? You still seeing the girl?” she asked excitedly.
I planned to keep Emily to myself – that way she would never expect me to
introduce them. But I soon found it impossible not to talk about her to anyone
who’d listen and ended up telling Aunt Sarah all about her, right down to the
freckle below her eye.

“Yeah,”
I answered, feeling flush with emotion as I thought about her. What a fuckin’
pussy I’ve turned into.

“And
it’s going good?” she asked, trying but failing to sound nonchalant. She was
prying. She wanted to know if I’ve told Emily about me – about the things
I was running away from.

“She’s
amazing,” I redirected my answer.

“You
need to tell her, Dex. She’ll find out eventually.” How? She lives over four
thousand miles away from my past. “And if she’s as amazing as you say she is,
she’ll understand,” she added. I huffed, feeling frustrated. I didn’t like to
talk about this and she knew it. “It was an accident, Dexter. When are you
going to forgive yourself?”

That
was it. I needed to end this conversation like five minutes ago.

“I
have to go. Emily’s in the shower she’ll be out any minute.”

“Okay,”
she sighed. “Remember I love you.”

“Love
you too.”

When
I hung up the call I could still hear the shower running and I was relieved to
have a few extra minutes to compose myself. I couldn’t afford to let this
overtake what my mind should be focused on tonight – telling and
showing
Emily how much I loved her. So,
after switching my cell to silent, I busied myself in the kitchen by whipping
up some of my famous hot-chocolate with extra marshmallows.

I
was sitting back on the couch when Emily emerged from the bathroom, dressed
once again in one of my t-shirts. She no longer bothered to try and tug it down
to protect her modesty and it was moments like this, seeing her still damp from
the shower and drowning in
my
clothes,
that I wondered how the hell I’d not bent her over the arm of the couch and
fucked her brains out before now.

Yeah,
I’m proud of me too.

Patting
the space beside me, Emily chose to bypass my hand and sit straight on my lap.

“I’ve
made you hot-chocolate,” I said, angling my head towards the coffee table.

“I
don’t want hot-chocolate. I want what you brought me here to give me,” she said
with a suggestive glint in her eye like she knew
exactly
what I had planned. Well she didn’t know everything –
she couldn’t have known what I was planning to
tell
her tonight.

I
thought about teasing her – dragging this out a little longer. But the
second her plump lips made contact with mine that plan went flying straight out
the fucking window and under the nearest bus.

I
closed my eyes while I tasted her…
savored
her. She tasted of toothpaste and almond shower-scrub. I tentatively licked
every inch of her mouth, not wanting to give into the urge to fucking devour
her and have it all over within minutes. When I ran my hand up the back of my
shirt and along her spine she moaned softly into my mouth, the vibrations
reverberating all the way down to my cock which was so rock hard and
uncomfortable I had to shift my position slightly.

“Tell
me what you want my present to be?” I asked between kisses, making her blush.
We both knew what it was but I wanted to hear the words trickle from her lips.
I wanted to
hear
her tell me how much
she wanted me.

“I
want it to be
you
,” she whispered.

“But
you already have me,” I teased, pushing her to tell me what she wanted me to do
to her.

“Well
I want
more
of you,” she answered
coyly – but it wasn’t enough. I lowered my hand down to her thigh and
slowly ran my fingers up to where the edge of her panties should be. Holy fuck…
there were
no
panties. Sweet Jesus
this playing hard to get shit was about to get a helluva lot harder.

“I’ll
give you anything you want, doll. You just have to tell me what is it.” I
traced small circles on the bare skin of her inner thigh and she literally
shuddered on top of me. Her breathing had accelerated. She was panting softly.
She was just as I wanted her… desperate.

“Please,
Dexter,” she whimpered, kissing the stubbled skin along my jaw.

“Please
what, doll? What do you want me to do to you?” I goaded, feeling intoxicated by
the feel of her warm breath coming in short pants across my face. She looked
down as she took her bottom lip between her teeth. “Do you want me to touch
you?” I asked, deciding to help her out. She nodded shyly.

“Here?”
I asked, inching my fingers closer to the spot I
knew
she wanted me to be. Again, she nodded – biting down on
that deliciously plump lip so firmly it turned white. “Or how about here?” I
added, stroking one finger along the moist crease which would soon be exploding
around my cock.

“Oh!”
she gasped, her eyes momentarily disappearing into the back of her head.

“Hmm,
you like that?” I stroked a little firmer, tracing the damp fold up and down
before going in for the kill and slipping a finger straight inside her.

“Oh,
Jesus!” she panted. I laughed softly, fucking
loving
what I was doing to her.

“No,
doll. Just me… only
I
can make you
feel this good.” But Jesus indeed. She felt every bit amazing as I thought she
would. Every bit as hot, as wet, as tight and fucking
needy..
. And that was just around my finger. Slowly but surely she started
thrusting her hips to meet every plunge of my finger. Unable to resist I used
my thumb to circle her clit simultaneously and I swear to God she nearly jumped
off my knee.

I
wasn’t ready for her to come apart on me yet though, so I tauntingly slowed my
pace until eventually I stopped altogether.

“Come
to bed with me,” I whispered into her mouth. Nodding softly, she climbed off my
lap and held out her tiny hand. I planned to pick her up but I was too freakin’
winded by what was happening so instead, breathing deeply, I let her lead me to
my room.

Instinctively
I closed the door behind me, even though I knew no one was around to walk in on
us. Then after pulling Emily close to me, resting my hands on her bare hips and
kissing her hungrily, I lifted my t-shirt over her head and pushed her gently
backwards until she flopped onto my bed.

“That
right there,” I said, motioning my hand over her perfect body, “is the most
beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.” Chewing on her lip, she smiled bashfully. Then
I eagerly peeled off my own clothes and tossed them to the floor, knowing that
in a few minutes time I would find it difficult to break away from her to do
it.

Her
eyes honed in on my dick, widening when she saw the glisten of the two small
rings dangling proudly from the end of it. Her face went from shocked to
alarmed in a nanosecond. Climbing on top of her, I chuckled.

“Believe
me, when you feel those babies inside you, you won’t be afraid of them any
longer,” I teased.

Her
small body was trembling below mine and I hadn’t even touched her yet. I felt
like a fucking king knowing I had this effect on her. Moaning into her soft
flesh, I trailed kisses along her throat, moving down until I reached the crevice
between her breasts. She arched her back, encouraging me. I pulled one of her
nipples into my mouth and sucked on it gently, tugging the hard pebble between
my lips. At the same time I used my hand to caress her other one, pinching and
pulling at it and making her groan.

Her
hands were on my back, kneading the skin between my shoulder blades. Then they
wandered downwards, grazing my hips as she tucked them between us and reached
down to trace the length of my cock which was throbbing so badly I feared it
might detonate any given second. I pulled away in the knowledge that if I
didn’t, this would all be over too quickly.

Shimmying
down the bed, never taking my hands off her, I settled myself in prime position
to finally get to taste the part of her I’ve been salivating over for too damn
long. I gazed up at her as I laid my hands on her knees, parting them slowly.
She had that sweet tasting lip tucked between her teeth and the most adorable
nervous smile on her face. My eyes wandered back down her stunning body,
pausing briefly when they reached her chest to admire how quickly, how
urgently
it was rising and falling. Then
I inhaled deeply, feeling like the luckiest man in the whole freakin’ world,
before burying my face between her legs.

Holy
fuck, I couldn’t get enough. With one hand resting on each of her inner thighs,
I licked, and sucked and fucking devoured her like I’d never been fed before.
Whenever I pulled away to lick my lips, to absorb the delicious taste of her, to
commit the intoxicating flavor to memory…she bucked her hips – begging
for more. I was more than happy to oblige. I could’ve kept going forever and
not once gotten bored.

The
more she moaned, the more she silently pleaded with me by riding herself
against my mouth, the nearer I became to losing it right there and then. I’d
never come without being touched before – but holy hell, I was sure I was
about two licks away from doing just that.

Desperate
to feel her wrapped around me, I wiped my mouth on my forearm and then made my
way back up the bed, hovering above her the whole time.

“You
liked that huh?” I asked with a wicked grin.

“Mmmhmm,”
she breathed.

“Well
that was me just getting started, doll,” I whispered against her neck as I
kissed tantalizingly slowly along the throbbing vein. Then I moved back to her
breasts – kissing them, kneading them… sometimes just
staring
at them. I could feel Emily
growing impatient below me. Her hips were forcing themselves into me, her
breathing was ragged, her shimmering body was trembling - writhing with
impatience…

“Dexter…”
she murmured. “Please…”

“Please
what, doll?” I answered, pushing her to the very edge of desperation. She just
whimpered and arched her body into mine. “Do you want to feel me? Do you want
to feel me inside of you?” I pressed, never easing my mouth’s relentless
assault on her nipples.

“Yes,”
she breathed, her voice cracking. “Please, Dexter…”

I
fumbled blindly through the drawer on my nightstand, unable to prize my eyes
away from her body while I searched for a condom. I kissed her lips fervently
while I teased it out of the foil packet with one hand, then I hitched myself
up just high enough to slide it on before hovering it over the place I was so
eager to be inside.