Take Two (32 page)

I became more frustrated
. “Why
do you need
such an elaborate scheme? Is all of this really necessary
?”

“It’s part of the
contract.”

“And you can’t aff
ord to get out of it or you
won’t
get out of it?”

“
I
told you i
t’s complicated. I—” his phone rang and he
accidentally
hit the speaker button. “Joan?”

“Mr. Sterling
, where are you?
”

“I’m at home.”

“
T
he driver’s cell
must have
died
,” she s
ounded upset
.
“
Could you get d
ownstairs
please? He should
still
be outside waiting.”

“What? Why?”

“The OWN network’s promo shoot is tonight in Grand Central Station.”

“What? Are you sure?
”

“
I told you this yesterda
y. I set an alarm on your phone
and I texted you two hours ago.
”

He shook his head and gave me an apologetic smile. Just as he was about to say somethin
g, another voice came on the li
ne.

“Give me that Joan!”
—i
t was Selena. “Matt? B
aby? Are you coming? All the cameras are her
e and everyone’s waiting on you.
Are you backing out on me?”

“
No
Selena,” he sighed. “I’m on my way.”

I really can’t do this to myself anymore…

“I love you!” she cooed.

“I love you too,” he hung up his phone. “I didn’t really mean that, Melody. I said that for the reality cameras. She only calls me
‘
baby
’
when she’s being taped.”

“Right.”

“I’m
very
sorry about all this,” he headed back towards the living room. “Can we reschedule for tomorrow?
”

“No,” I followed him out the door and onto the elevator. I didn’t say another word.

I should’ve known better…

“I really am sorry,” he motioned for me to step off the elevator first. “
I have to rush over there right now but my driver can drop you off after me.
How long are you going to be ma
d
?”

“Not long at all.”

“Okay well, can we talk about this tonight? Can I call—”

“You
can call me all you want.
I won’t be picking up.”

“
W
hy?”

“Because I deserve better. I deserve someone who wants to date me and
only me
and isn’t hiding behind some lame ass contract that he could easily buy himself out of.”

“Melody
,
it’s compl—”

“I know! I know! It’s complicated! I get it!
So let me make it less complicated for
you
Matt. Whatever the hell this was, it’s over.”

“Don’t. Listen to—”

“No. You don’t really know
me anyway. You
don’t know
a thing about me—just
basic surface things and those aren’t enough to build a
ny type of
relationship
on.
We can be
associates
s
ix
months from now.
”

“
I’m not waiting six months
just to talk to you M
elody.”

“W
ell
I guess we won’t be anything at all.
Good luck with every
thing. I don’t need your driver. I’ll c
all a cab
.
”

“Are you serious? I’ve been nothing but honest with you for the past two months! I told you that I like
d
you, that I want
ed
to be with you, and here you are going in the other direction again! Jesus! Answer something for me since you seem to think I’m not interested in you. Right now, w
ho am I here with?
”

“
Who
are you running to?
”

Ma
tt

Joan
turned on the lights in my room.
“When’s the
last time you took a shower
?”

“
I don’t know. Maybe three days ago?
Don’t look at me like that Joan!”

“I’m
going to turn on the Jacuzzi
. You need to be clean for the Ralph Lauren walk-through.”

“Fine,” I sat still, not wanting to get up.

Melody hadn’t answered my calls or texts in over two weeks.
Every morning and right be
fore I went to sleep I
called her and she never responded.
I sent a white rose and a bag of Tropical Skittles to her job every day,
with a “Please call me tonight
” tag, but she never called.

I wanted to stop by her office, but I was
convinced
she would call security.

“You
can’t have them both,” Joan patted my back
. “It doesn’t
work that way.”

“I don’t want Selena
at all
. You know that
Joan.”

“
Do I?”

“T
hat hurts.
Really?”

“Off the record?”

“Off the record…”

“You may have
messed
up
your chances with Melody for good
. She doesn’t seem like the type that’s goi
ng to come
running back to you. Y
ou still have a chance to make things right with Selena
though
.”

“
You know me better than anyone, Joan. You know
she threatened to ruin my career. And you know tha
t t
here’s a
contract
.”

“When have you let that stop you before?”

Never. I never had. I’d pulled out of films the first day of filming. I’d pulled out of photo shoots hours before. I’d
canceled
talk show appearances minute
s before.

I didn’t know why I was still going through with the wedding, why I was putting myself through the misery of marrying Selena.

I s
ank down
in my Jacuzzi, thinking about Melody, about Selena.
All of a sudden
it dawned on me: I still wanted the exposure. Even though I was annoyed beyond belief with the media, I was still secr
etly addicted to the fame.

I signed that OWN contract with no hesitation, with no second thoughts. I paraded around New York with Selena—even though I couldn’t stand her—
silently
relishing
the same publicity I swore I hated.

I didn’t want Selena to go to the
press with a bogus
domestic violence story, but I
always
knew
that
I could prevent it: Joan had taken pictures of her putting on that prosthetic baby bump
on two separate occasions
.

I could’ve pulled out a long time ago. It wasn’t complicated at all
.

Melody

Janis Joplin and I threw
another concert. This time we
invited Kelly Clarkson and Reba
on stage with us.

My heart was
broken. Crushed.

M
y attempts
to heal
it with
double
pints of
chocolate chip
ice cream
were failing miserably
.
I couldn’t figure out why it hurt so badly if I wa
s never in love with Matt
.

I just liked him a lot. A whole lot
..
.

Every
time his
name came across my
phone’s
screen, I acted as if I didn’t see it. I didn’t open any of his text messages, and I made sure Sophie didn’t put him through to my line at work.

He
showed up to my apartment twice last week, knocking so loudly I was scared he’d break down the door. I wanted to answer it, to bury myself in his embrace and invite him in, but I turned my TV all the way up.

This was how I usually dealt with things. I blocked my problems and whoever was causing them out. Over time
, everything usually went away.

Jen
and I were sitting on a bench at Coney Island. She was doing a great job of keeping my mind off of Matt, but all of a sudden I began to cry. I leaned on her shoulder and sobbed until I couldn’t anymore.

“You sure you don’t want to call him?” she patted my back.

“Him who?”

“Okay, whenever you’re ready to act your age let me know.”

“I can’t call him. I’m still mad…and hurt. If he didn’
t like Selena
and
really didn’t want to be bothered with her, he would’ve
left her
a long time ago. I’m not stupid.”

“I know. Hasn’t he been calling you every day though? You can’t pick up just once?”

“I don’t know…Maybe in a week or so, but if he marries her I can’t. I can’t be someone’s second choice again. The first time was painful enough.”

“
Are you going
to the wedding?”

“No.”

I couldn’t fathom sitting in the media row with the rest of the writers, listening to them dissect everything about the event. I couldn’t see myself paying attention to anything but Matt—watching how he smiled at the audience, how he turned on his charm for the cameras, how he kissed her wit
h the same lips that kissed me.

“
You sure you’re not in love with
him
?” Jen
smirked.

“Yes, I’m sure. I haven’t known him long enough to be in love.”

“What does
time
have to do with anything?”

“Will you go to the wedding in my place?”

“Ha! You think he would let me get out of there without harassing me about where you are and where you’ve been? Thanks, but I’ll pass. You want to know what I think?”

“No.”

“I’ll tell you anyway. I think you’re one hundred percent in love with Matt and you’re too stubborn to admit it. I think you should give him a second chance.”

“I’
ll try
…”

I woke up Saturday to another text message from Matt
. I decided to open it
:
“
I’m ordering pizza for lunch today. I’ll think of you while I eat…If you want to join me, let me know…
I hope you’re okay…
Call me later?

I went into my kitchen and pulled out a carton of eggs. I remembered how Matt scrambled them
at the diner
and tried to replicate his instructions.

I didn’t burn them at all.

Matt

The hair and make-
up stylist
gave me a few finishing touches before backing away. The producer went over the questions with me three times
. When
s
he was sure I was ready,
s
he signaled for the clapboard.

“Matt Sterlin
g interview
with OWN
, take one, section three
. Action!” the director’s voice yelled.

“Mr. Sterling, t
ell us about the exact moment that you knew you were in love
,
”
the interviewer asked off camera.

“The exact moment?” I s
cratched my head
. “I knew I was in love when I went one day without talking to her. Every time I did something on th
at day, all I could think of
was telling her about it later. Then we went a week without talking, and then it was two weeks and um…I just can’t—couldn’t get her out of m
y mind. That’s when I knew I had fallen
in love.”