Taking Chances (Learning to Love) (19 page)

After I finally got Jamie off the phone, I went back to my article to polish it up and send it off to Pete. I was anxious about the possibility of getting on the payroll part time. I was going to need the money to replace my poor mangled car. Things were easy now while Kat's parents insisted on paying the rent, but that wouldn't last forever. Freelancing was not going to pay the bills.

***

Wednesdays were a standing lunch date with Kat and usually Jamie, since we graduated high school. Even though we lived together, we made sure we took the time to spend with each other even when our lives were busy or one of us was absorbed in a relationship. That last part wasn't going to be a problem for me anymore at least.

I hadn't heard from Sebastian since he left my house Friday night, other than a few texts on Saturday. There was a part of me that wanted to break down and text him, ask him what his problem was, or beg him to see me, depending on the hour. I should have known, he was only in it for the sex and now he was done. I couldn't exactly blame him. That was what I'd wanted too.

Was that still what I wanted?

Another part of me wanted to say screw it, I had a good time and that was that. Yet still, I found myself peeking at my phone every so often, hoping to find a text or call from him.

What the hell was happening to me?

"Are you looking at that phone again?" Kat peered at me above the menu, one eyebrow raised.

I shoved the phone into my pocket, knowing full well I would have no trouble feeling it if it buzzed. "I was checking the time. Did Jamie tell you she'd be late?"

"No she didn't mention it, but you know Jamie. She is perpetually late." Kat shook her head at Leo, who was on his way over to take our order, nearly buzzing with anticipation at the chance to speak with her. He walked away sullenly to wait for her to be ready.

"I've noticed Matty hasn't been over. Is everything okay with you two?" I knew I shouldn't even ask, but it was my duty as best friend to at least keep up appearances.

"I guess so. I mean we haven't talked much the last few days but only because he has been busy with your father's wedding. Shouldn't you know that kind of thing?" She placed the menu down, folding her hands over top. Looking it over was a mere formality. Kat always ordered the same thing for lunch at the cafe, a chicken fajita with avocado. She wasn't really into change.

Jamie finally made it at about the time Kat was ready to order without her. She squeezed herself between Leo and a large man with tree trunk legs, who had his chair pulled all the way out.

"Sorry, sorry, I know, I'm late
again
." She flopped down into the chair, propping her feet up on the support bar under the table. She looked tired and a bit ragged, unusual for her.

After Jamie took a moment to glance over the menu, Leo took our order, looking extra long over Kat until she waved him off dismissively.

"Why is it you look like you just crawled out of bed?" I asked her.

"Maybe she did just crawl out of bed. She is a newlywed you know." Kat took a long draw off her root beer and flashed me a quick wink.

"Oh ha ha. Justin's cousin had some sort of accident and we've been at the hospital practically nonstop for days. Apparently, he isn't doing too well.

I could feel the color drain out of my face and everything around me sounded like it suddenly got very far away.

Sebastian is Justin's cousin.

Oh my God. What if something awful happened to him and that was why he didn't call?

I pulled my phone out to check, hoping that there would be a text and everything was fine.

Kat noticed my panic without me saying a word. "Lex, what's wrong? Are you okay?"

Jamie brought her feet down and leaned over, touching my arm. "Hon, what is it?"

"What happened to him?" I practically whispered.

"Who? Justin's cousin?" Jamie looked at me very confused.

"Sebastian?" Kat caught on to what had me so upset.

"Oh, no hon, not Sebastian. It was Lincoln, Sebastian's older brother." Jamie smoothed her hand up and down my arm. "He fell down some stairs and he's been unconscious. The doctors said swelling in his brain or something like that."

My surroundings started to drift back into focus.

"Sebastian is okay?" I needed the confirmation for some reason.

"Yes, he's fine. Well, I mean he's not fine, but physically, he's okay. Are you two involved? What the hell have I missed?"

I looked at Kat for help with that one and let her explain everything to Jamie. Thankfully, she was general and left out some of the more embarrassing details.

The thought of something bad happening to Sebastian had tore my insides to pieces. It didn't make sense that I would have such a strong reaction to it, considering I'd only known the guy a couple weeks. I just couldn't help it. There was something about Sebastian that grabbed hold of me and refused to let go. The way I felt around him was like nothing I'd ever felt with another man.

I had spent half the time since I'd last seen him thinking he was a jerk for not calling like he said he would and he was sitting in some hospital watching over his unconscious brother. I was a shit. I pulled out my cell and typed a quick message to him.

'Heard about your brother. So sorry. Hope all turns out well.'

I didn't expect an answer back but my phone buzzed almost immediately.

'Sorry for not calling. My phone was dead and I didn't want to leave to charge it. Meet me tonight?'

That was unexpected. I typed back a reply just in time to notice both Jamie and Kat silently staring at me, curiously.

"What?" I tried to look innocent but they weren't buying it.

"Was that Sebastian you were texting?"

"Yes," I popped a piece of bread into my mouth. "So?"

"Um, you said, and I quote, 'There is no way in hell I am texting or calling that bastard', just last night." Kat made a ridiculous impression of me as she spoke.

"Yes, well, that was when I thought he was being a douche and avoiding me. It wasn't his fault."

"Yeah, I'd cut him some slack. This morning when we went up to visit, he looked like crap. He hasn't even left the hospital since it happened. He doesn't smell too great either." Jamie made a disgusted face at the memory.

"Oh. He asked me to meet him tonight." Knowing he hadn't left his brother's side made it seem odd that he all of a sudden wanted to see me.

Jamie and Kat both stared at me, mouths dropped open, in shock.

"Are you sure you didn't misunderstand?" Jamie was the first to speak, giving me a skeptical look.

"Yes, I'm sure." I held my phone out, showing them the text. They looked at each other and both shrugged at the same time.

Jamie's phone rang. I'm yours by Jason Mraz started playing, letting us know it was Justin calling. Kat nudged me under the table.

"Did you say yes?" she whispered, trying not to disturb Jamie's call.

I nodded, trying not to look as excited as I felt.

Damn body, always betraying me!

"Oh my God! That was Justin. Lincoln woke up right after I left and he's doing a whole lot better!"

It made more sense that Sebastian wanted to see me now that I knew Lincoln had woke up.

"So he's going to be all right?" I asked her.

"Looks like it. Lincoln was always more like an uncle to Justin than a cousin, being so much older and all, but I know they've always been close. It would be hard for Justin to lose him. Sebastian too. I've gotten to know him a lot better over the last few days." Jamie tossed some bills on the table towards lunch and stood to leave. "I'm gonna head over and pick Justin up. He has been glued to the hospital and I'm sure he is ready to go now that he's okay."

She stopped and turned back after taking a few steps. "Lex, you know he was married right?"

"Yeah, he told me she died." I recalled his eyes, so sad when he talked about his wife.

"Justin says he's never been the same since. Don't expect too much from him, ya know?"

I nodded. I wasn't really expecting anything from him. It wasn't like I was looking to replace his dead wife. That was the last thing I needed. I had to admit, I did want to see him again, and only partly because of the sex. Sure the sex was amazing and another round wouldn't be turned down, but there was something else, something I couldn't quite put my finger on. Regardless of the fact that I knew whatever this was would be temporary, I couldn't stop from seeing it through.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

I hadn't been that nervous for a date, in who knew how long.

Wait, was this even a date?

He said, 'Meet me', but maybe that just meant he wanted to talk, or maybe it meant he wanted to fuck. I was confused and nervous, like I was thirteen and going out with a cute boy for the first time. Only problem was, I wasn't thirteen and this wasn't our first time, for anything. I'd slept with him, and I was using the term 'slept with' loosely, twice already. It was crazy for me to be such a giant ball of nerves. My stomach flip flopped, in further evidence of my irrationality.

Sebastian texted that he would pick me up at eight after he had a chance to go to the office and get some work done. With Lincoln in the hospital, he'd spent every possible moment with him, letting everything at work pile up. I offered to take a rain check so he could catch up, but he was insistent about seeing me. Not that I wanted to reschedule, because I sure as hell did not.

Since I had no clue what he had in mind, choosing what to wear was only adding to my anxiety. I knew I should have just shot him a text and asked, but for some reason, that only made me more tense. I had no idea what had gotten into me. Even Kat didn't know what to say. She watched me pace around the apartment and change clothes four times, just shaking her head, not saying a word.

I finally settled on a charcoal gray top with cut away shoulders, and my favorite pair of black skinny jeans. I finished the look off with a pair of short, suede boots and left my hair down, leaving the natural curls to frame my face in loose ringlets. Luckily the humidity was low, or it would have been a frizzy mess. Not that I couldn't have taken the flat iron to it, but I hated to be bothered.

"Why are you so nervous? You really like him, don't you?" Kat gave me a sly smile, pointing out the obvious that I was trying to deny, even to myself.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I tried looking nonchalant about it all, knowing full well, I was failing.

"Uh huh, right. Lex, I know when you are falling for someone. You can't fool me, even when you manage to fool yourself."

"Okay, maybe I am a
little
nervous and sure I like him, but I most certainly am not
falling for him
." I shook my head at her.
How could she even think that?
The last thing I needed was to get some guy into my head like that. I was done with relationships for good. She knew that.

At exactly eight there was a knock on the door. For the life of me, I would never understand why the guy never used the doorbell. Kat ran over to let him in, making sure she had a chance to get some information from him.

"So where are you two love birds headed this evening?" she asked, taking his arm and inviting him inside.

"Nice to see you again, Katarina. Where is your boyfriend tonight?" He never missed an opportunity to bring Matt up to her. Maybe it was his way of keeping her from flirting with him.

"Will you be home late?" She completely ignored his question.

Sebastian looked directly at me, a small smile curved up one corner of his mouth. "Anything is possible, Katarina." He pried himself from her grip, and extended a hand to me. I took a step forward, accepted his waiting hand, and left Kat mouthing 'Have Fun' behind us.

Outside, he opened the door to a hot little Ferrari, gently closing it behind me. It was not the black Lexus he usually drove. The car smelled new and extravagantly expensive. It looked just like the car Matt used to have taped up on his wall when we lived home.

"Nice car."

"I save it for special occasions."

"This is a special occasion?" I raised one eyebrow at him, still having no idea what he had planned.

"It is indeed. Lincoln is awake and doing well, it's a beautiful night, and I'm with you. It hardly gets more special than that." He winked, put the car into gear, and took off down the road.

I normally hated fast driving. When Matt drove crazy I was near panic, but somehow with Sebastian, it was different. I didn't feel the tiniest bit anxious, and he was going much faster than Matt ever did. I did find it a little strange that he drove like that after his wife had died in a car accident. It piqued my interest further but I couldn't exactly blurt out 'so tell me the details of your dead wife's accident'.

We drove in silence, until we came to a clearing off the main road. I could see tiny twinkling lights hanging from a tree and a cozy table for two with candles. A small tent was set up nearby that was lit up, but I couldn't tell what was inside. I glanced over at Sebastian curiously.