Tame This (The McCallans, Book Two) (34 page)

Pregnancy. It had to be pregnancy hormones, right? She was moody and irritable, and worst of all, talking in circles. Jesus, was he really capable of surviving an emotional woman?

Yes. It was Melanie and he loved her more than anything. He loved her. He was
in love
with her…

Unless you have something more to say to me…

“Ohhh shiiiit,” he exhaled, bending over to place his hands on his knees. He really
didn’t
, did he…

Absolutel
y Nothing. That’s the point.

“I
am
a fucking idiot,” he announced as he stood upright, running his hands through his hair.

“We know that, so get the hell out of the street,” Teague said from the sidewalk, just as a car honked and veered around him.

Because if I have to tell you…

“Oh my God, I’m a stupid as
s
prick
!” Jay shouted out loud, still in the middle of the road.

“Do you
ever quit with the drama over there?” an elderly voice hollered from a porch across the street.

It was the same old lady that always sat in her window, just to eye all the comings and goings in the neighborhood. And Jay was pretty damn sure she was the one that called the cops a few months back when he beat the shit out of Jordan Meyers
after he broke Melanie’s arm.

“Then what the hell would
you
do all day long?” Jay yelled back.

She stopped watering her plant on the porch, gave him a nasty scowl, and hurried into her house, slamming the door behind her.

Jay shook his head and rushed up the driveway past Teague. “I need to borrow your car.”

“Um, okay,”
Teague answered with a tiny smile. “But only if it’s for what I think it’s for.”

“Don’t fucking move her stuff,” Jay warned.

“Got it,” Teague replied holding up his hands. “Truck stays put until she calls to chew me out.”

“Not gonna happen. I promise.”

“Well…okay. Good luck. And good God, please be careful with my car.”

Jay rolled his eyes but the warning didn’t even faze him. He jogged to the garage for the set of keys and was on the road sixty seconds later.

Chapter Thirty-Two

The drive was a blur. The miles
passed beneath her, but Melanie just stared straight ahead and kept driving.

She’d cried enough for him. It
didn’t matter that she was completely in love with Jay McCallan…he just didn’t feel the same way about her. Moving on physically, separating herself from him, was the only option right now. She needed a good job and a stable life for her baby and she couldn’t keep wishing for Jay to come around.

But that was a lie. She would always have hope for him. She couldn’t imagine ever getting him out of her head. Last night there was a possibility—a chance that he could turn things around—but it wasn’t enough. She couldn’t keep going through that revolving door without him ever pulling her in once in a while. He did
somewhat
last night, like he’d done several times before, but it was like he would only put forth so much effort, and out the door she went again.

Jay McCallan needed
to learn how to share
all
of himself…

She was just about to pass through Burbank when something caught her attention. It wasn’t everyday that you saw a gorgeously restored ’69 Boss Mustang, but this one was more familiar to her as it drove right alongside her. At first there was an awkward moment of confusion as she wondered why Teague was driving his car and not his truck, but then she caught sight of the driver motioning for her to pull over.

Jay.

Her heart
jumped into her throat, but the only thing she could do was keep driving. That ass was going to cause an accident on this part of the freeway! Not that he was doing anything dangerous, but did he not know that just his presence screwed up her entire mind and body?

When she looked straight ahead and kept driving, he revved ahead and pulled in front of her car. The little shit even slowed down, forcing her to do the same.
He signaled to pull into the right lane, and Melanie exhaled a deep breath and finally did the same. She followed him to the next exit ramp and he pulled into the parking lot of a fast food restaurant.

Melanie sat in her car for a moment to
gather her composure. Whatever Jay had in store for her was going to affect her one way or another. This cycle with him was going to cause her to go into premature labor!

He got out of the Mustang and approached
the driver’s door. Just the look on his face tied Melanie’s stomach all up in knots. She went to open the door but Jay got to it first. He held it and took her hand to help her out. Without a pause, he leaned her against the car and gently took her face in his hands. Her baby was starting to kick so freaking hard it hurt, but she couldn’t blame the poor thing because the pounding of her heart and rush of adrenaline was probably doing a number on him or her.

Jay leaned forward and said, “There’s something I need to say to you, and I can’t let you go until I do.”

He took a deep breath, and before he released it, he tucked her under his chin and held her close. Melanie’s walls started to crumble at that point. He seemed so uneasy yet sure of himself as he held her tight like he wouldn’t let go.

She wrapped her arms around him and held on just as
securely, taking in his scent and everything about him that she loved so deeply. He was a protector. A guardian by nature. He was and always had been her warrior in life, and at this point, she was hoping to God he would also fight for her love. She would give it unconditionally, but she absolutely
needed
for him to reciprocate her feelings.

Jay pulled away slightly, and as he did, kissed the top of her head. He looked her in the eyes for a few seconds and then shook his head like he was at a loss for words.

Finally he swallowed, and as he lightly touched her cheek with his thumb he said, “I can’t let you go, Mel. You don’t belong in San Diego, you belong up here with me. And I know I’m not the easiest person to get along with but… I just think we fit, you know? And I know I don’t deserve any more chances with you but… I’m asking for one. However pathetic that makes me look, I don’t even fucking care.”

He was waiting for a response, but she wasn’t going to give him one right away. She wanted him to work through his thoughts on his own without her involvement, even though she feared he was going to
retreat.

Jay sighed as he pulled away just slightly. Melanie believed he wasn’t going to go through
with it and she felt panic race through her chest as she scrambled for something to say. But nothing came—just a sad feeling that washed through her like a giant, vengeful wave.

Was it really so hard for him to say three simple words?

“I need to meet the landlord on time, Jay,” Melanie barely whispered. “I need to start doing things right and I have to be on time for this.”

Jay barely shook his head. “You’re not leaving. You can just call ‘em up and tell ‘em you’re not moving in after all.”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Telling me what to do isn’t going to change my mind, Jay.”

“Yes it is. Because… I can’t do this without you. You have to stay, Mel.”

“Do what without me?”

He sighed and shook his head again. He was silent for several long seconds as he stared at the pavement below them. Finally he said, “I can’t raise a fucking dog without you, Melanie. He’s just gonna shit and piss all over my house and he’s gonna get so big that I’ll be wrestling him out of my bed every night…”

Melanie could only stare at him. He looked completely serious, too. Was this a joke?

“What dog? Are you talking about…?”

“We’re getting Tank,” he informed her.

She smiled at the name she’d given the oversized pup the first time she visited him, but she couldn’t believe what she was hearing. The thought of leaving that dog behind had literally killed a part of her inside, but there was no way she could have adopted him and brought him to her small San Diego apartment. He would get gigantic, and besides the cost and time to care for him, she had to put her baby first.

“The paperwork is already done,” Jay continued. “All you need to do is sign since I put you on it with me. If you don’t, then I doubt they’ll let me take him since they want him to go to a family and…”

Melanie studied his face as she waited. She could feel it within every fiber of her being that this moment was going to change her entire life.

Jay leaned forward again, placing his hands on the car behind her. Without words, he brushed his lips across her mouth and then back again. Melanie’s heart was thundering in her chest, and even though the baby was back to kicking the hell out of her ribs, this moment was the best feeling in the entire world.

“I am…
so in love with you, Melanie Jacobs,” he whispered against her lips, sending a cascade of shivers down her spine. “It has totally scared the shit out of me to say that, but now that I have, I will never stop saying it. I love you. I always have and I always will. Please don’t leave me. Stay. Move in with me, let me take care of you and the baby, and let’s be a family with that goddamn dog that I know is going to ruin my life…”

Melanie lightly laughed, but Jay’s sexy smile was too much to handle. He had her and he knew it, and if there was anything that she could say about this moment, it was that Jay McCallan was everything she knew he was.

“I’m not kidding,” he added. “He’s gonna chew shit up and otherwise be a total pain in my ass. We’re going to hate each other ninety percent of the time once he gets his confidence back, and to be honest, I’m definitely not in to sharing you with him. He’ll find his ass out in the backyard anytime he tries to take your attention away from me—”

“I love you too,” Melanie interrupted with a smile. “I’ve loved you since the day you
helped Camryn and I move.”

He
slowly smiled but tilted his head with confusion. “What dumbass thing did I do
that
day?”

She chuckled and shook her head. “Nothing dumb, other than making fun of my bird constantly. But remember when Don my stupid neighbor came out? He creeped me out big time and I
was pretty sure you could tell. You stepped in front of me to block him from looking me over even more, total alpha move. You stole my heart in that moment and I hardly knew you. And even though you really are difficult to handle, I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I love you, Jay, with every bit of my heart and soul.”

He brought his lips back to hers and finished what had been started. Just to kiss him again weakened her knees, and as he pressed deeper into her mouth with his tongue, his hands slid over her stomach and held on softly. It was such an endearing gesture—he made
every part of her feel wanted—and as he kissed her so deep and so thoroughly, every single inch of her protective wall crumbled to pieces.

Without a doubt she belonged with this man.

When Jay kissed her softly one last time and pulled back to look in her eyes, he smiled and said, “Get in your car and head to my house. You’re moving in today.”

She
raised an eyebrow and studied him carefully. “You think so, huh?”

“I know so.”

She crossed her arms over her chest to deliver a witty remark, but there was something that took over her thoughts subconsciously.

It had to do with a certain female…

“Answer me one question and then I’ll think about it,” she told him.

That obviously caught him by surprise. “What is it you still need to think about?” he asked carefully.

She took a slow breath of air to give herself time to choose the right words, but all she could say was, “Sophia Nixon.”

Jay’s appearance visibly changed and he turned very somber. Melanie didn’t even blink as she watched him thoroughly, waiting for a response.

“What exactly do you need to know?” he asked. “I’ve told you about her. I’ve told you about anyone I’ve been with.”

“You were with her recently and I want to know why,” she replied without missing a beat. “If you love me, Jay… I mean… How could you want to be with someone else? And n
o, you and I weren’t ‘together’, since I know you’re going to use that one, but if you’re going to stand here and tell me that you’ve always loved me, then I don’t really understand—”

“I did not hook up with her again,” Jay interrupted with a sigh. He looked her in the eye and added, “Yeah, I went with her that night to get you out of my head—I was sure I lost you for good—but all we did was talk. We talked about
you
. I swear to God, Melanie, nothing happened. Not even a touch, not even the desire for it. I would never lie to you, sweetheart, I promise you that.”

He took her hand in his and leaned against the car.
She had never known him to lie to her, even though there were a few times he probably could have and it would have made her feel better. But she knew he was always honest with her and it truly was one of the things she loved so much about him.

“
I sat there in her limo and just whined like a bitch for almost an hour about you,” he continued. “I wanted to be with you so bad but I just…couldn’t make it work in my head. She told me that the problem was that it didn’t need to make sense in my head. It just needed to feel right in my heart. So I thought about that for a few days and I knew she was right. And when everyone was over at my house last night, all I wanted was
you
there. I didn’t care about anything else in the world except for you being right there with me, no matter what I was doing or where I was at. I would have rather been
anywhere
except there without you.

“
I got shitfaced, yeah, and Tyse pretty much tried to kick my ass into admitting that I was in love with you. It was just…a series of events that made me understand myself, I guess. It scares me, Mel.
Being someone to you.
You mean everything to me and I don’t want to disappoint you. I really don’t. And your baby… He’s a part of you and I will love him just the same, but what if I can’t do it? What if I totally fuck up his life because I’m such a complete douchebag and can’t even give him decent advice? Well fuck the advice, what if I can’t even change a goddamn diaper?”

At first Melanie stared at him with disbelief. But then she laughed with surprise and said, “Oh honey, you’ve been thinking about changing
diapers
?”

All he did was shrug.

“Wow, that’s…” Melanie didn’t even finish the thought as she shook her head.

“What, you expect me to be a lazy dumbass and not help you with anything?” Jay asked with a smile. “I mean I’m trying to be realistic here. If we’re going to be living in the same house with a baby…”

“Jay, I never expected you to do anything like that. Honestly. In my mind, I’m committed to doing everything on my own so I’m not an imposition to anyone. It’s kinda funny that you’re worried about a canine ruining your life when I’m having a baby that’s going to affect it even more.”

“Hold up right there,” Jay
shook his head. “You—or baby—are
not
an imposition. And the baby is a bonus that comes with you, sweetheart. He’s in the lineup automatically, babe, no doubt. Melanie, I love you,” he said softly, pulling her close. “I know I’m not going to be great at this, but I promise that I’ll try. I mean I’m still gonna be me and you know what that entails. That’s not an easy thing to deal with, but I never want you to feel like you’re in this alone. I want to protect you, and keep you safe, and make you happy, and just…fuck you like crazy now and then.”