Tapped (Totaled Book 2) (30 page)

            “I don’t understand,” I replied, completely confused.

            “He’s refusing to come to the gym and train until he sees you,” he huffed, bitterness and irritation stamping each word. “He wants to talk face to face.”

            Ahh. That’s what’s wrong with him. This’s why he was so quick to downplay what happened with Sue. Drew demanding to see me and refusing to train was throwing him off his game.

            “And you’re okay with this?” I argued, shocked that he was actually going to allow this.

            “Shit, no! But he’s standing firm and I’m not in the mood to play games. I don’t think I need to explain to you how much we have riding on this fight and if he’s not going to…”

            “Well, don’t yell at me!” I interrupted. “I didn’t do this.”

            “No, but you sure as hell aren’t innocent either,” he charged.

            Sue awoke with a curse and cut an annoyed look in my direction before covering her face with a couch pillow to block the noise. I wrinkled my face in apology and got up to leave the room. Once I was behind the closed door of Sue’s bedroom, I continued the conversation.

            “What exactly are you accusing me of?” I demanded, hoping he could hear how offended I was.

            “Listen, I’m not getting into this with you. I saw the way you looked at him yesterday.”

            “What?” I shouted.

            “What, nothing!” he yelled, his breaths coming fast and short. “Go see him, talk, say whatever you need to say. Get it all out of your system. And get my fighter back into the goddamn gym!” He was furious. Angrier than I’d heard or seen him in as long as I could remember. He no longer had control over this situation and it killed him.

            I gave him a moment before I spoke, some out of respect and some out of actual fear of what he might say.

            “Where?” I finally squeaked out. “Where is he?” My heart was beating out of my chest just thinking about seeing him.

            “At his house, I’m assuming.”

            “Is that
okay
with you—that I go there?” Part of me didn’t give a damn, but the good girl in me wanted his approval, not just his demand.

            “It’s fine,” he scolded. “Mick is there so I know he won’t kill you this time,” he snarled, reminding me boldly and distastefully what got us into this mess in the first place.

            “That’s not fair, Dad.”

            “It’s more than fair,” he contended. “Now, go get your
closure
and get your ass home.”

            The phone disconnected and I sank down onto the bed, his words taking away my strength to stand. I knew he was scared and hurting, but the loss of his authority in these circumstances had wounded him enough to take it out on me. His words were all but devastating and it took minutes for me to find the stability to leave the room.

            Sue had fallen back to sleep by the time I got back to the couch, so I scribbled a quick note and left it on the end table next to her head. I hadn’t showered or even brushed my teeth, but it didn’t matter. I had to go. I had to see him once and for all and figure this all out.

            I chewed gum in a nervous frenzy the entire fifteen minute drive over to Drew’s place and took a quick glance into my rearview mirror to find that there was no hope for my appearance. I slowly approached his front door, knocking softly a few times. No one answered. I didn’t want to knock obnoxiously since it was so early in the morning, but I couldn’t help but be confused. Wasn’t he waiting for me?

            Something told me to walk around to the back and my legs took me. I followed the skinny path within the dunes and sea oats on the side of his house until he came into view. Standing with his back to me, he watched the water as the sun rose higher and higher above the horizon, the colors beautifully framing his silhouette. He turned his head ever so slightly, I guess sensing that I was there, and then turned around completely.

            I froze.

            I was unable to take another step for a few seconds as we stared at each other. His posture relaxed, relieved to see me before him, and he advanced toward me. I walked forward, my stomach in knots of nervousness, and he matched me step for step until we were mere feet apart. The salty sea breeze blew violently around us both, coming off of the crashing waves and onto our skin. The second we entered each other’s space, my world went silent. I didn’t hear the water or smell the ocean. I didn’t feel the wind on my face or the sand under my feet. I was only in tune to him.

            He swallowed hard, his eyes sharp and assessing, darting around my face as he took me in. They roamed and finally settled on my cheek just underneath my left eye; his shoulders fell as he exhaled. His right arm reached for me, stopping midway and then slowly continuing up, his eyes asking for permission. I lowered my chin and leaned into him as his fingertips grazed over my skin, tracing the scar he had given me. My eyes closed at the intensity of the moment.

            He moved a few inches closer and cradled my jaw in his hand, urging me to open up and look at him—to really see him. I did and his eyes brimmed with tenderness and compassion. I looked into them, trying to memorize every shade of green, every fleck of gold, not knowing what the future held. I just knew that if I was never able to lay eyes on him again, this was the image that I wanted to remember. My gentle and loving Drew, normally stuck inside a giant, rough exterior, was now exploding out, his shrapnel penetrating my soul.

            He brought his other arm up to hold my face in both his hands and I remained absolutely motionless, our bodies having a certain understanding that this was what needed to happen. I shifted and moved a fraction of a step closer to him, relishing his embrace, and he met me. His eyes squeezed closed, unable to take it in any longer, and his forehead rested on mine. 

            It was powerful, breathing the same air as each other, sharing the same space. As he weaved his fingers into my hair, I extended my arms to rest them at his sides, needing to feel more, to touch him in return. The contact rippled through him and he accepted my affection with a tremble.

            “There are no words,” he said, pulling his face away so I could see him. “No words can ever express how sorry I am.” His voice cracked with emotion and it took everything inside me to not break down. “I never meant to hurt you, Bree.”

            An electrifying shudder reverberated through me and he pulled me into him as I let it overtake me. I buried my head in his chest and wrapped my arms around him, holding on for dear life and letting go all at the same time. I cried, holding nothing back as deep sobs racked my insides. I clawed at his back, clutching him to me as if he would be yanked away from me at any moment, soaking up his scent like it was the last time I would ever be that close. I released every fear, every doubt, and surrendered to what my heart was feeling at that very moment—love. Comfort and grace, understanding and healing, and unconditional love.

            “Can you ever forgive me?” he whispered into my hair.

            I pulled away to see him and couldn’t respond fast enough. “I already did.”

            His lips crashed into mine, firm and determined at first but instantly softening to match me. He held my face again, steadying me and controlling the connection, and I allowed it, powerless to resist. I wanted him to take what he needed. He stilled, enticing my lips open with his tongue and slowly tasted. I let him lead but soon was moving to my own wants and needs. Our tongues danced in a perfect rhythm until he deepened the kiss.

            My knees went weak at the impact and he held me up against him, our bodies molded together in a perfect fit. His hands roamed and caressed from my shoulders down to the small of my back, pleasure pooling between my legs. I didn’t care where we were or who was watching. I didn’t care about anything in that instant but our contact.

            We kissed until we didn’t need to kiss any longer. We touched until we no longer needed to touch. We made up—made everything right again.

            He held my hand and we sat on the sand, staring out into the endless horizon together. Listening, feeling, understanding each other. For several minutes—how many, I was unaware, I enjoyed just being with him again—I forgot about the rest of the world and our obligations. Until they reared their ugly heads in the back of my subconscious, aggressively moving to the front of it.

            “You’ve got to go now,” I said to him reluctantly, sadness lacing my words.

            “I know.” He turned to me and waited for me to look into his eyes. I let my lips curl into a smile and he leaned in to kiss me again, a brief but comforting peck. “I love you, Bree,” he whispered. “More than anything.”

            My heart ached with fullness and my every doubt was whisked away with the very breeze surrounding us. “I love you too.”

Chapter Thirty-Eight

DREW

            Four days after I’d held Bree in my arms and finally told her how very sorry I was, we saw each other again. She came to the gym towards the end of our training, walking into the room like it was nothing. A few of us were still on the mat stretching, Pat and Tony standing over us talking about the logistics of our trip and the timing of events in our schedule. Everyone stopped chattering immediately when she entered. Her confidence as she approached our huddled up group was sexy, but when she smoothly draped her arm around my shoulders and gave me a kiss on the cheek—in front of her father and brother—I fell in love with her all over again. It was bold and fearless and I was so glad she wasn’t ashamed of us.

            We were respectful for a few days after we reconnected even though Pat’s demeanor didn’t exactly make it easy to maintain my professional and considerate attitude. The look on his face when she strolled in, commanding the room, brought me back to the day she came to my house, upon my request—or more like demand—of Pat.

            As difficult as it was, she had to leave me that morning at the beach for me to get to the gym. I walked her to her car and watched her pull away, keeping my eyes fixed on the vehicle until she turned the corner and I could no longer see her. Mick was waiting in the kitchen, of course, and gave me a knowing smile. I didn’t know how much he saw of our reunion but I didn’t really care. He was the one who told me to fight for her.

            He offered to drive me to the gym, saying that he’d love to hang out and sit in on some of the training. I had no objection and actually thought it might be a good buffer between Pat and me. He was surely pissed off and I knew damn good and well that I would feel it during the workout. I’d played my ace and he didn’t react to it well. Especially since his daughter was the prize.

            Mick warned me to stay cool. He walked in ahead of me and Pat started up the second my body crossed into the room.

            “Well, here he is, ladies and gentleman—our
hero
of the hour,” he yelled with sarcasm. “He saves one damsel in distress and thinks he can start ordering everyone around,
refusing
to get his ass to the gym until he gets what he wants.” I ignored him and walked straight to the bench to set my bag down. “Did ya get what you wanted?” he harassed. I didn’t answer him. He continued to rant and rave but it was more to the room instead of being focused in my direction. “Never in all my life have I seen this shit. Got people standing around waitin’ on you to…” he disappeared down the hallway, his voice becoming too faint to hear clearly, only to return a few seconds later. “…on
my
payroll doin’ nuthin’!” His face was red as he paced around, spewing and rambling about all that was on the line and how I didn’t have any “fuckin’ respect.”

            Mick tried to settle him down but that only seemed to make it worse. When I finally stood and cut him off to say “Are you done?” I thought he was going to hit me. He rushed over and got right in my face, screaming so loudly that my ears popped.

            “Fuck no, I’m not done! I will yell and scream and cuss, and yell some more until I fucking feel better, understood?” he hollered, his face so close to mine that I could feel his breath and smell his morning coffee.

            Liam pulled Pat away, separating us enough to come and stand in between our bodies. He spoke softly and I didn’t catch every word but it was something along the lines of how we’d already lost a day and we didn’t need to waste any more time screaming at each other. He was able to talk him down and Pat eventually calmed enough for us to make the most of what time we had left.

            Each day that passed, it got better. Pat backed off and kept our contact and interaction strictly business and I didn’t mention Bree. I just hoped that she wasn’t getting any backlash at home. I knew she could handle Pat better than anyone, though, and was sure she was holding her own. I tried to focus, truly, but I couldn’t escape the thoughts, the memory, the feeling of her face in my grasp, her hands on my back. I felt hopeful, unburdened, lighter, but mostly alive. I felt so alive.

            We had texted, but not much. No long, drawn out discussions or deep conversations. Just enough to remind each other that we were thinking of one another. Just enough to say that we were good and that we’d continue to be good until after my fight, when I could make her my priority. Because I had every intention of making her my priority. She’d know without any doubt in her mind that I cherished her and appreciated her loyalty when I was at my very darkest. She’d have to force me to ever leave her again.

            When she walked into my circle in the gym, taking charge of the energy, it was to make a statement. It made me proud to be able to call her mine. She kissed my cheek and backed away all in one smooth movement and began speaking to the group.

BREE

            “Okay, boys, I have everyone’s passports,” I revealed with a prideful smile, opening a large hardback binder. “Each of you has a folder here that you’ll be responsible for. They each contain all the same documents in addition to your personal information. Your passport is enclosed, but you’ll also find the details of your travel accommodations, everything you’ll need as far as transportation documentation, and your itineraries.”