That Wedding (31 page)

Well, shit. I've got this one. We don't even need to discuss this.

We've got this aced.

"Phillip and I spend tons of time together. We're together all the time, so we're good."

Phillip gives me a little glare.

Pastor sighs. "It's great you spend time together, but are you spending enough time apart? Everyone needs a little space."

I swear to God, yes, God, you up there! Are you listening to this shit?

I can't say ANYTHING right!

I say we spend lots of time together, he says it's wrong. If I would've said we hate each other and never want to be together, he would've been proud.

This is so stupid.

Plus, I can hear the margaritas calling my name.

Well, not really, but I just got a text from Neil that said,
The margaritas are calling your name
. So like I know they are.

Phillip says, "We do spend time apart. And I can see how that will become even more important since we've started working together."

I turn and look at him. Is that really my Phillip? Did he just say he needs time away from me?

"You want time away from me?" I ask, trying not to sound as crushed as I feel.

"No, I just.....like how you take baths or go shopping. Like we don't do everything together even now."

Pastor John says, "Exactly. For a marriage to be strong, you have to maintain your own self-worth and confidence. You should feel comfortable letting Phillip have hobbies of his own. Occasionally, he should be able to see his friends without you. Just like it's important for you to do the same."

Speaking of friends, ours are at the bar waiting for us. We should probably get going.

Pastor continues. "If you're together all the time, it can become suffocating."

I say with just a tad of sarcasm in my voice, "So first, our marriage is going to fester and get infected, and then we're going to suffocate each other. Gee, marriage sounds like great fun."

He ignores me, has us do some lame flashcard game where we're given examples of a conflict, and we have to work it out with our words. Phillip and I do awesome on this exercise.

Probably because the things we were supposed to be fighting about were unrealistic. Like I can't imagine us ever fighting over things like rules for our kids, or sex, or friendships, but I talked them out with Phillip like the perfect little bride.

As we're walking to the car, Phillip smiles sweetly at me. "You did a good job role playing. It's good to know we can work out conflict. You definitely deserve margaritas tonight."

I don't have the heart to tell him that I was totally faking everything.

Lori's on the phone whining to me. "Jade, we need to plan your bachelorette party, and I'm thinking maybe you should ask Lisa or Chelsea to do it because I'm pregnant. It kinda sucks that I can't drink, and I'm afraid it won't be fun."

I'm prepared for this conversation because Danny called me the other night while she was taking a bath and gave me a heads up.

"You know, Lori, I'm kind of over the whole let's get drunk, eat penis cake, dance, and party thing. I mean, I'm getting married. I'm supposed to be a grown up. What I really want my bachelorette party to be about is spending time with my girlfriends. Like would you be upset if we didn't have a bar crawl kind of party?"

"Uh, um...," she mumbles.

She's shocked at me, I think.

"Well, what would you wanna do?"

"I don't know. What about a girl's day? Like maybe we go to the spa, come back to my place, order up food, and have, I don't know, a pajama party sort of. Drink some martinis, talk, and enjoy being with the girls?"

"Really???? Danny suggested a spa thing, but I know how you like to party and dance, and I figured that's for sure what you'd wanna do."

"Yeah, I know. I hope it doesn't mean I'm getting old and boring already, but if I'm gonna dance and party, I'd like to do it with Phillip, not some random bar guys."

"I don't think it means you're old and boring, Jade. I think it means you're in love."

"That's probably true."

"This will be so much fun. We'll do it the same weekend the boys go to Vegas."

"The boys are going to Vegas?"

"Oh, I guess I better have Danny call you about that."

Pretty soon, Danny calls me. I swear, it's a good thing I have a boss who won't get mad at me for planning my wedding and talking to my friends when I'm at work. One of the benefits of working for Phillip.

"So I'm planning the bachelor party. Got any suggestions or things I can or can't do?"

"What did my dad say before I went to visit you in Lincoln?"

He laughs and uses a deeper voice, "She better not get drunk, stoned, pregnant, or dead. I will never forget that phone call."

"I'd say something along those lines. I'd like him not to get so drunk he does something he'll regret. I'd like him to be alive when it's over, and preferably nothing involving jail time."

"Cool. I can handle that."

"So what are you going to do? What's the plan?"

"Well, my plan is to get a few of the bros together for a weekend in Vegas. My bye week is the first week in December, so it should work out great. We could have one continuous buck ass wild party."

"Sounds awesome," I say, but truthfully, I don't want Phillip anywhere near a buck ass wild party. I want him home with me.

Is that bad?

Am I clingy?

Am I going to smother our marriage before it even starts?

"I thought it'd be awesome, but then I was talking to one of the guys on the team. He said the bachelor party shouldn't be about what I would like, but what the groom would like. So I have an idea. It's maybe a little unconventional, but I know he'd love it. And based on what Lori wants to do for your bachelorette, it may be perfect."

"Now you have me interested."

"Phillip, in case you don't already know it, is freaking nuts about you."

"You think?" I giggle.

"Uh, yeah, and when I mentioned taking him away for the weekend, I could tell he wasn't crazy about the idea. So what if we sorta combine the bachelor and bachelorette parties?"

"I'm not dancing for you, Danny."

"I think we'd all get in trouble for that. So, I haven't worked out all the details yet, but I thought we'd fly in separately on Friday. You girls go do the spa or whatever. Us guys will go golfing, followed by the traditional bachelor party night. The next day, we'll figure out a fun way to surprise Phillip. Then we'll all go out together Saturday night. Do drinks, have a nice dinner, go dancing. What do you think?"

"Danny, that sounds like so much fun, it really does!" But then I think about everyone having to fly to Vegas, pay for rooms, drinks, and the spa. "I'm just worried about asking my friends to spend their money on a trip to Vegas when they've already bought dresses for the wedding and all that. It feels like too much."

"Jay," Danny says softly.

"What?"

"I've got it covered."

"What do you mean? You've already talked to everyone, and they're okay with it?"

"Not exactly. I mean, I have it covered. I'm gonna pay for it. The flights, hotel rooms, the spa, all of it."

"Danny, you can't do that! It's way too much."

"Jay, listen to me. You guys are my best friends. I'm so excited you're marrying each other, and I wanna do this for you, for both of you. Please just be gracious and say
thank you, Danny
and don't fight me on it."

I want to put up a fight because Danny's going way overboard on this. But it's not very often that Danny asks me not to fight with him. It might the first time. Um, no, it is the first time. For sure. Danny likes to fight with me, I think.

"Fine, I won't fight you on it. It sounds amazing and is incredibly sweet and generous of you. But I have one request. Will you dance at
my
party?"

"Uh, no."

"Awwww, come on, Danny. You'd put those Thunders from Down Under to shame."

"I'm gonna say no, sorry. So what do you think about surprising Phillip? Like not telling him that you're there? Don't you think he'll love that? I was thinking we'd dress you up and have you come to our suite, like you're a dancer or something."

"He will be all hungover and probably won't even notice it's me."

Danny chuckles. "Jay, you know how it'll be. Phillip will be fine, and the rest of us will be hanging."

"True, Phillip never gets all fucked up does he?"

"Nope."

"I kinda like that about him."

"Well from what I hear, you kinda like
everything
about him. And a few things specifically. Who knew you were so naughty. And don't you two ever get tired?"

"It's all so amazing with Phillip. And no, we don't. I really don't know why I didn't take your advice and sleep with him sooner. I could've had so much fun."

"Cuz your stupid and stubborn, just like me, and you won't do what anyone tells you is good for you."

I think of something that's been bugging me, so I ask him. "Danny, do you ever think about cheating? I mean you're like this big sexy quarterback making the big bucks, and girls are always throwing themselves at you. Do you ever want to? Are you glad you got married?"

"Did Lori ask you to ask me this?"

"Uh, no, why?"

"Then why are you asking?"

"Well, couple's counseling is sort of freaking me out. The pastor is supposed to be pro-marriage, but it feels like he's trying to talk us out of it. He keeps referring to our marriage as like a dead body. It's going to fester. It's gonna get infected. Then, we're gonna smother it to death! I'm just wondering if marriage is a smart idea."

"Do you want someone besides Phillip?"

"No, but what if I change my mind? What if he does?"

"Jay, you can't do that to yourself. He's either the one, or he's not. Do you think he's the one?"

"It feels like he's the one."

"So why are you worrying about it?"

"Danny, did you pay attention to your wedding vows? 'Til death do you part? Forever and ever and ever? I mean are there out clauses somewhere? Like what if Phillip gets a big beer gut or a hairy back? What if we get married, and I find out something about him that I don't like?"

"For God's sake, Jay, you've known him your whole life. I don't think you're in for any surprises."

"Maybe."

"And just for the record, I love Lori. I'm smart enough to know that a roll in the hay with some hot chick isn't worth losing her over. Are you smart enough to know that?"

"I don't wanna roll in the hay with anyone but Phillip, but I'm afraid he might want to."

Danny's voice sounds concerned. "What's going on? Why would you think that?"

"I don't know. Well, there's this girl he works with that has a big crush on him. Like it's so obvious. Phillip takes his team out for drinks sometimes, and when I get there, she's always sitting next to him and flirting with him."