The 10 Year Plan (11 page)

Damn it; he still couldn't believe this was the same man Myles had been raving about. The perfect one. The one he was sure he'd spend the rest of his life with. He was a creep and Brody was holding back from just punching his lights out.

“See? Now you're being a good boy.” He looked directly into Brody's eyes mocking him. “But just so you know… I'll do what I want. I'm going to start with throwing you out of my apartment. You got it?”

“I got it,” he murmured as he bit down on his tongue and tried to contain his rage.

“Good. I'm glad we're on the same page again. Now leave!” Hunter held the door open as Brody walked outside. He gave Brody a shove and then slammed the door behind him. “Asshole,” Brody heard Hunter say just as he was saying the very same thing.

***

Myles, wrapped in a towel as he exited the shower, was just going to get dressed when the text arrived. It was from Hunter. “I'm not coming tonight. I'm not into it.” Not again! He felt himself deflate like a helium balloon losing air.

Damn it, he couldn't believe it, not after all the trouble he'd gone to, after the dinner he'd prepared. Everything perfect, plus all the time it took. All the special little touches. What did he do wrong? He couldn't comprehend where he screwed up this time. He had been extra careful not to smother him. He attempted to avoid all the mistakes in the past that scared off all the other guys. It was different with Hunter.

Myles heart sank in his chest. He'd screwed it up again. There was no denying it. He was broken. Something was wrong with him and for the life of him, he couldn't figure out what it was. Feeling totally defeated, he picked up the phone and dialed Brody's number. He needed someone to make him feel okay about himself. He was feeling lower than he had felt in a very long time. This was it, he thought. This was his last chance at finding love. Brody was the only person who could put a smile on his face at a time like this.

Brody entered his apartment and flopped on the couch. This was a disaster. What had he done? What if Myles found out? He couldn't imagine what kind of overreaction he'd get about this. Myles didn't understand things like casual sex and just hooking up. He knew he'd read into it and accuse him of the hookup being something more than a simple misunderstanding. Brody also knew that if he found out that Hunter wasn't interested in him the way Myles thought he was, it would break his heart. Either way it was a no-win situation for Brody and he didn't know what to do.

He sat on the couch contemplating how to handle the situation should it come up. As these thoughts raced through Brody's head, the phone rang. He dreaded finding out who was on the line. Yet he knew instinctively who it was. He pulled the phone out of his pocket and looked at it. Of course, it was Myles. Brody braced himself for the worst as he picked up the phone.
Time to pay the piper,
he thought. Brody picked up.

“Hunter broke up with me,” Myles blurted out in the saddest voice Brody had ever heard him use.

“Aw, shit. I'm so sorry. Myles.” Did Myles not know what happened? Did Hunter just break it off and not say anything? Brody could tell by Myles' voice that that he had dodged a bullet, and maybe he was off the hook with having to tell Myles what happened.

“Could you come over?” He couldn't stand being alone. He'd really thought this was the one.

“Death by chocolate?”

“Death by homemade tiramisu.” He tried his best to keep the mood light so as to not scare Brody off. He knew if he sounded too morose that Brody wouldn't want to come and listen to his complaining. But he knew that even at the worst of melodramatic moments, Brody was always there for him. Tonight Myles really wanted to see him and was determined not to fuck things up.

“Be right there,” Brody answered. What to do? Should he tell Myles what happened? Own up to it so there were no secrets between them? Or should he just let it go and hope Myles never found out? Okay, he thought, he'd play it by ear. Either way, dessert was on the table. More important, he had his best friend back, and that made him happy.

On the ride over to Myles' apartment, Brody's anger broiled. What a dick this Hunter guy was. How could he do that to a nice guy like Myles? If only there was a law against lying on Grindr, he would have hauled the asshole into the station.

But he had to put that out of his mind now. He still needed to decide if he was going to tell Myles what had happened. Brody had never lied to Myles about anything and had promised himself that he never would. How could he break this to his friend? Brody had never cheated on anyone.

Cheating was the one thing that crossed all boundaries and violated all the rules. He had known the pain of being lied to and cheated on and swore he would never do that to another person. Never allow someone to feel that pain because of him. Thus, he had one-night stands with strangers so he never had to worry about it. Myles, on the other hand, was loving, caring, honest, and true, the patron saint of gay dating. Any guy would be lucky to be with him, and that ass Hunter didn't know what he had.

***

Myles and Brody sat at the impeccably set dining room table. French press coffee, homemade tiramisu, flowers, the whole bit. Myles melancholy. He was being so sweet that Brody couldn't help but try to make him feel better.

“One day you're going to find a guy who is smart enough to realize what an amazing catch you are,” Brody said as he sat at a table dressed so perfectly that Martha Stewart herself would be envious of. “You're going to make someone the best husband.”

“What about you?” Myles asked, subtly inferring that the invitation was there should Brody be interested.

“Me?” Myles had to be kidding, Brody thought, a hint of regret in his voice. “I'm no catch.” Lost in his own guilt, he'd totally missed the inflection in Myles' voice indicating that the question he posed was an invitation and not an inquiry as to his own virtues as a partner.

“That's not true,” Myles answered. Did Brody really feel that way? How could he? He was always so confidant, so self-assured. He had to know deep down in his heart that any guy would be lucky to have his love.

He took a bite of the dessert. “Yes, it is. I'm not like you. Any guy who would pass up a night like this with you is a fool.”

“Well… I'm obviously doing something wrong.” It was sweet of Brody to think that someone would be fortunate to have a man like Myles as a husband, but even Brody didn't want him in that way. Myles was determined not to make this a pity party. He just wanted to enjoy what was left of the evening with his friend, resolved that it was not going to take a downward turn.

“It's the guys. You just have lousy taste in men. Like Hunter for example...” Brody thought he'd approach the subject carefully. He wanted to tell Myles what happened. It was the right thing to do.

“Let's not talk about him, okay? I'm depressed enough without talking about him. He was nothing but a jerk, an asshole, if the truth be told. Besides, I don't want to ruin the rest of the night talking about him.”

“I think we should...” Brody insisted, once again attempting to come clean with what had happened.

“I really don't want to.” Myles firmly snapped back. “Hunter is over and done with. It's time to forget him.”

“Let me finish. He doesn't deserve you. Any guy who would break up with you by text is a creep and isn't worth your time.” This was Brody's last attempt to share with Myles what happened earlier in the evening.

“You don't think I know that? I didn't even call him back. I'm tired of being mistreated by guys who don't appreciate me.” It's said that depression comes from anger. If so, the depression was turning back to the original. He was damned angry now. He was tired of trying so hard and having it end by being ditched.

“Good for you Myles.” Could it be that his friend was finally learning to love himself? Myles needed to stand-up for who he was and accept all the gifts he had to offer. Brody was pleased that Myles was taking charge of his life and demanding that men respect him.

“Now, can we please just move on? Let's just enjoy the fact that we're hanging out together,” Myles asserted in a strong confident tone that Brody barely recognized.

“Sure. Let's make tonight about your amazing dessert.”

“And us!”

Brody and Richard sat on the hood of their squad car eating lunch from a taco truck.

“So run this by me one more time,” Richard said. “Why didn't you tell him what happened the other night with this Hunter guy?”

Brody shrugged, feeling miserable. “I couldn't. If you knew how upset he'd be, you wouldn't have told him either.”

“Actually, yes, I would have.” Richard's tone was stern.

“Myles can't handle these things.”

“He's a grown man.”

“On the outside maybe, but on the inside he's all Hello Kitty. Plus, he'll never find out.” Or at least Brody hoped he wouldn't. Anyway, how could he? Brody wasn't going to tell him, and Hunter or Stone—whoever the hell he said he was—wouldn't either, now that he was out of the picture.

“That's not how it works. They always find out. Trust me. And if they don't, you'll always think in the back of your head that they know and just aren't saying anything.”

“Does someone have some baggage from a past relationship they want to talk about?”

Richard chuckled humorously. “Let's just say I learned the hard way.” Brody knew him all too well.

“Fine. I'll talk to him.” Brody knew Richard was right. He hated to admit it–and wouldn't. He and Myles had a relationship based on trust and honesty, and he wasn't going to let that change. No matter how hard it would be.

As soon as they finished eating, Brody called and asked Myles to meet him at the go-go bar. For a night of drinking.

***

It was happy hour. Heavy house music thumped as Myles sat with his Manhattan. Brody was late. Strange, Myles thought. Brody, much like Myles, was always on time. It was one of the few things that they shared in common. It was one of those little idiosyncrasies he loved about Brody, laid back but always punctual. They both felt that it was passive aggressive to make someone wait for you, a trait they hated in people. Something must have come up, Myles surmised, and he was happy to wait.

Finally Brody arrived and took a seat beside him.

“Hey, Myles. How you doing?” Without a doubt Brody was not looking forward to telling Myles what had happened. In fact, he'd delayed showing up for that very reason. Now, he just had to hope it would be okay.

“It's my second Manhattan, so pretty good.” He joked. It was his way of letting Brody know that he wasn't upset that he was twenty minutes late.

“Are you still upset about Hunter?”

“I liked him. He was a really nice guy.” His voice sounded sad but not angry or depressed like it had before.

Brody gave him an earnest look. “He wasn't that nice.” Brody thought he'd broach the subject slowly. Warm Myles up to what he had to tell him.

The bartender approached them. He was clearly familiar with Brody and his choice of drink “Hi, Brody. Martini?”

“No. Thanks. I'll just get it thrown in my face.”

The bartender frowned in puzzlement. After a moment he shrugged and left.

“What did you do?” Myles asked, his tone full of apprehension. He knew Brody all too well and this was clearly going to be something big that Brody had to get off his chest.

“Can we just start off by me saying it wasn't my fault?” He felt a knot in his stomach. This was harder than he thought it would be.

Myles couldn't imagine Brody doing anything so wrong that he'd actually be that upset with him. He figured that he'd just make light of the news Brody was about to deliver. He teased. “That's the worst way to start a conversation! That's like telling someone, ‘Oh. I know it looks bad,' or, ‘This is just going to hurt a little bit.'”

Brody took a deep breath. He knew he had to get this over with and just hope for the best. “I can already tell this is not going to end well.”

“I've known you for over ten years. Nothing you can say is going to bother or surprise me anymore. So just tell me.” Myles hated games. He was a lawyer, so he just wanted facts. He knew Brody fucked up and had something to confess. He just wanted to know what happened and move on. No need to dance around it. Myles knew all of Brody's tricks by now.

If that would only be true, Brody thought. But he had his doubts. “I ran Hunter's ID down at the station. His real name is Steven Adams. He's from Nebraska.”

“I know where he's from. But I didn't know his name wasn't Hunter.” Brody watched Myles process that and brace for whatever he had to say. Myles tone was shifted from amusement to genuine annoyance.

Okay, Brody thought. This was going to be the hard part. Yes, he'd known Myles for years, but he didn't know how he'd react. “Yeah and it's not Stone either. That's the point.”

“What's the point? And who is Stone?”

“Exactly! Neither of us knew his real name.” Damn it, this was hard, Brody thought.

Myles frowned. “Just tell me what happened.”

It was now or never, but he really had no choice. “The other night after I left your place I went on Grindr to meet someone.”

“You hooked up with Hunter!” Brody dropped the bomb and Myles was ground zero. Did he just hear correctly?!

“I didn't know it was Hunter! He called himself Stone. Who calls himself that anyways? He texted me on Grindr, and I went to his house. I didn't know I was doing anything wrong. I would never do that to you!”

“You suck.” Myles dismissed him. It was like a switch had been turned off within him.

Oh, crap,
Brody thought. He was afraid of this. Now Myles was both hurt and angry. Again, Brody should not have taken Richard's advice. Would he never learn? “How was I supposed to know? You've never introduced me to the guy.”

“So you were the one who ruined this for me? I met a great guy and you just couldn't stand it, could you?”

This was even worse than he'd thought it might be. Damn it, why did he have to hook up with the same man as Myles? Karma? Fate? Whatever? Shit! Well, maybe Myles had a right to be upset. But my God, Brody hadn't known it was Hunter.

“He's not a great guy. Certainly not the Prince Charming you think he is. Trust me, Hunter's a creep.”

“Trust you?” Myles was furious. He suspected that Brody was jealous that he wasn't spending time with him. Myles knew that Brody missed him and needed his attention, but this? Total betrayal! Myles felt like he was just sucker punched in the gut. His best friend stabbed him in the back. Brody clearly wanted out of their “Ten Year Plan” and went to great extents to weasel out of the arrangement. That had hurt Myles' feelings, but he was willing to let that go because he knew Brody wasn't capable of having an adult relationship, but to sabotage Myles' chances of happiness, just so that he always had a buddy to hang out with, crossed the line.

Brody had just hurt Myles like no one had ever hurt him before. He trusted that they had each other's best interest in mind, but clearly Brody was too selfish to give a fuck about Myles' happiness. Myles snapped right then and there. The rest of the conversation was a large buzz in his ears. Myles contained his rage and looked for the cleanest exit.

Brody was becoming angry too. Why was Myles overreacting? It was a simple mistake. Why did Brody have to be the one to pay for all the guys who had hurt him in the past? Myles was the one who set himself up by overdoing it on every date he went on. Myles needed to accept his responsibility in all of it. “Think about it Myles. It's always the same thing. You bring this on yourself. Stop hoping that one man is going to be what you need to make you happy. That's not the case. It never will be. Face it Myles, there is no knight in shining armor who'll come for you. There never will be.” Brody couldn't believe he'd said that but there was no taking the words back.

“Sadly that's true, isn't it?” Abruptly, Myles stood up. “Things can't stay the same. I've got to go. Sorry, Brody, but I can't do this anymore.” Myles wasn't going to engage with this anymore.

He agreed with Brody. He was partially responsible. He had indeed blindly trusted every guy he went out with and wore his heart on his sleeve. This was the very last straw. It ended now. No one was going to hurt him anymore. Especially Brody. After ten years of hoping something special existed between them, Myles need to accept the simple truth. It didn't. Not in that way. Brody was incapable of giving Myles the love and relationship he wanted. It needed to end now.

Brody had badly wounded him. He didn't want to even look at him. Myles hurt so deeply that it took all of his strength and self-control to manage to be civil when leaving the bar.

“Wait. What?” Brody was shocked. God, what had he done!

Myles looked at Brody with sadness. He called to the bartender and threw down a couple of bills. He wanted to make a statement. A farewell gesture. This would be the last time he saw Brody. He would buy him a drink and exit his life forever. He turned to the bartender who could see that things had gone very wrong between these two men.

Myles calmly ordered. “A martini… DIRTY!” he said, indicating that what Brody had done was reprehensible, then he stood and strode toward the door, and never looked back.

“Myles, please—” Brody called after him, but before he could finish, Myles was gone.

And Brody knew that things would never be the same.