The Atonement (32 page)

“Are you going to be available after the
service is over?”

“Why?”

“Mrs. Sharpe was wondering if you could help
her serve dinners in the church hall across the street. They’re
kind of short of staff and they could use some help.”

“Why the hell would you think I’d want to do
that?”

“You’re right. Forgive me for thinking that
you would want to do something for someone other than
yourself.”

“Oh, don’t try to guilt me. They’re your
people, not mine. Why don’t you help them?”

“I would, but I have Bible Study class, and
it wouldn’t be fair to Daniel.”

“I’m just a visitor here. Don’t you have any
other members available?”

“I wouldn’t be asking you if there were. But
if you don’t want to, I can’t force you,” he said walking away.

Then Allyson had a second thought. The
experience might be useful in helping her to find out what goes on
behind the scenes, and learn what this place and these people were
really all about.

“Tim, wait!”

He stopped and turned to look at her.

“I’ll do it.”

“Thank you. You can meet them up front after
the service”

“I’m not doing this for you. Like I said, I
have a job to do”

“Don’t remind me”

He was about to turn away, but turned back
suddenly.

“Allyson, do you think one day, we could meet
up just to talk…”

“No”

Allyson turned and walked away without saying
another word and took a seat in the second to last pew near the
entrance. As she crossed her legs, she diverted her attention to
the praise team that had gathered at the front of the church
signaling the start of the service. She had no interest in hearing
anything Tim had to say. A famous writer once said, that one should
believe what people do and not what they say. As far as she was
concerned, there was nothing that Tim could say that would change
how she felt about what he had done to her. She had seen Tim’s true
colors a long time ago, and she was determined to treat him
accordingly.

As the service got underway, Allyson went
through the church bulletin to distract herself from the bitterness
that was welling up inside her. There were times when the memory of
his transgression would flash before her and she felt as if she
were reliving it all over again. All of a sudden she was eight
years old, laying in her bed, and crying herself to sleep for what
had to be the thirtieth night in a row after the recent death of
her beloved Poppa, one of the few people in her life that she knew
actually loved her. In the midst of her sobbing, she heard a tumult
coming from Tim’s room down the hall. It sounded as if someone was
tearing the room apart. Amidst the racket she heard the agitated
voices of her mother and her new nannies, Safi and Anna, and
another masculine voice. She wondered what they were doing. Allyson
got out of bed and went to the door and poked her head out. They
were in Tim’s room and the door was open. There was a police
officer standing outside writing on a tablet and her mother was in
the doorway directing the two nannies who were inside.

“Search the armoire and all the dressers–
thoroughly! Check for secret compartments! If there are any papers
check every word!”

“Yes, ma’am,” said Safi.

“Anna, check under the mattress,” said
Eleanor.

“Ms. Russell, can you tell us who was the
last person to have contact with your son?” asked the officer.

“He was last seen at school…he was supposed
to have lacrosse practice, but the coach said he never showed,” she
answered.

“Do you think you could give us information
on some of his friends? Maybe we’ll get a lead from one of
them”

“Oh…I don’t really…” she began. She rubbed
her forehead as she did when she was trying to think, “Anna, do you
know anything about Tim’s friends? You know the boys that stop by
sometimes?”

Allyson immediately picked up on what was
going on and her heart was beating out of her chest. She ran down
the hall toward her mother and the officer.

“Tim’s missing, isn’t he? Did someone kidnap
him?” said Allyson.

“Allyson, sweetheart, please. Go back to bed.
Your brother has not been kidnapped. We’re just trying to find out
where he is right now,” said Eleanor.

“But if you called the police…”

“Just as a precaution, my dear. Trust me,
Allyson, everything is going to be fine.”

“That’s what you said about Poppa, and he’s
dead!”

“Allyson, this is not the time!” said her
mother, who had to stop her self from reaching out and shaking her
daughter. “Safi, please put Miss Russell to bed.”

“Yes, ma’am,” she said as she emerged from
the room. “Come now, little miss. Let’s go back to bed,” said Safi
holding out her hand to Allyson.

“No! I want to help,” said Allyson. She knew
she was taking a real risk considering her mother’s temper. As long
as the officer was here, she knew her mother wouldn’t dare strike
her, but when he left, she would pay. But she wanted to help Tim,
and she was willing to endure her mother’s cruelty if it meant
having him back home and safe.

“Allyson, do as you’re told!”

“The police will find him, miss,” said Safi
as she pleaded with the little girl, and looked back fearfully at
the angry expression on her employer’s face.

“I’m his sister. I know who his friends are
and I know his girlfriend, too,” said Allyson as she ignored the
other adults and appealed directly to the officer. “He talks to
them on his laptop all the time.”

“Do you mind?” the officer asked Eleanor. She
merely nodded her assent. The officer stooped down to Allyson’s
level and introduced himself to her and asked her what she knew.
Allyson told them everything she knew about Tim’s friends and where
they lived. She also made sure to tell them about the girl. Allyson
knew Tim was crazy about her because she had caught them making out
in his room on more than one occasion. She only hoped what she was
telling them would be useful in finding Tim. She didn’t know if
someone had done something bad to him or if he had gotten lost
somewhere. She just wanted him back safe.

“Thank you for your help, sweetheart. I
promise I’ll do everything I can to make sure your brother gets
home in one piece. Now go to bed and get some sleep, ok.”

“Yes, let’s go, Miss Ally,” said Safi as she
took Allyson’s hand gently.

They both started back toward her room, but
Allyson kept her ears open to hear what the adults were saying.

“If we could have the computer, it would
help,” said the officer.

“It’s gone,” said Anna who was out of breath
after turning half the room upside down.

“Does he usually take it with him?” the
officer asked.

“Sometimes, if they having a project at
school or something like that,” replied Anna.

When they got to the room, Allyson burst out
into tears.

“Oh, miss, don’t cry. Mr. Tim hasn’t been
missing that long. The officer will find you brother. He promise
you,” said Safi, as she gently stroked Allyson’s hair.

“What if he doesn’t? What if some evil person
like…killed him or something? That happened to this kid I heard
about on the news,” said Allyson.

“You need to stop watching the news. You too
young for that. Anyway, Mr. Tim is a big strong boy and he know how
to take care of heself. He could have went someplace with he
friends after school and they got lost or someting.”

“But what if he’s hurt and he can’t get home,
like that time he went camping with Stuart and Gary and they left
him in the woods by himself while they got a ride from Gary’s
sister.”

“We find him then, and we will find him now,
little miss. Don’t worry you head and get some sleep now.
‘Right?”

Safi tucked Allyson in and left, but there
was no way the younger girl could sleep. She had just lost Poppa
and now Tim was gone, too. Tim was the only person left in her
family that she could trust, the only other person who had ever
been there for her in any capacity. She couldn’t imagine living
without him. She hoped with every fiber of her being that he would
be found alive, and soon.

It would be two weeks before they had heard
anything. During those two weeks, Allyson rarely slept, but crept
around the house during the night to listen in on the conversations
her mother had with her close friends, Aunt Morgan, the nannies,
the police and Hurst when he finally decided to get involved.
During the day she would have Safi drive her around to different
places in the city where Tim would hang out with his friends, to
check to see if he would appear, but he never did. Allyson had
never been so scared in all her life. With Hurst’s help, they
finally found him in California and had him detained in central
booking at a local precinct. Her mother and Hurst went in the
latter’s private jet to pick him up and bring him back, meanwhile
the nannies filled her in on what was going on.

“
See, I told you they’d find
you brother - all the way in California, no less. It’s a good thing
you told them about the girl because that help a lot. Turn out she
was missing, too and they get them both together.”

“
Did kidnappers take them
there?”

“
No. He and the girl come
there all by theyself.”

“
You mean he ran
away?”

“
Yes, Miss.”

“
Why would he do
that?”

“
I think he was still sad
about your Poppa being gone and he felt stressed, maybe a little
lonely even.”

“
But why would he feel
lonely when I’m here?”

“
Mr. Tim is a big boy and
you’re a little girl. He need help you can’t give him.”

“
Was he going to stay there
with that girl forever?”

“
I don’t know nothing ‘bout
that, Miss. I think he woulda come back after while. Fourteen is
big, but at that age you still need a mommy and a
daddy.”

“
He didn’t even say goodbye
to me,” said Allyson as tears spilled down her cheeks.

“
Oh, little Miss Ally, come
here,” said Safi, who had stopped her work to take Allyson in her
arms. “I’m sure Mr. Tim didn’t mean to leave you. He probly just
ran off without thinkin’ much. Sometimes when people’s heart hurt
they head don’t work to good. You brother always love
you.”

“
No he doesn’t. He’s just a
liar! Just like the rest of them! And I don’t care if he ever comes
back!” said Allyson as she snatched herself away from Safi and ran
to her room.

“
Miss Ally, that’s not
true!” Safi cried after her “Miss Ally!”

Allyson locked her door and threw herself on
the bed letting her face sink into the pillow that muffled her sobs
and absorbed her tears. “How could Tim do that to me? How could he
leave me here all by myself?” she thought at the time. If he loved
her he would have taken her with him like he did that girl, or at
the very least he would have told her his plan. She thought he
always told her everything, just like she always told him
everything. After Poppa’s funeral, Tim promised her that they would
work together and take care of each other, but now it seemed that
was just another empty promise like the ones her mother and Hurst
made all the time. She would have expected a betrayal like this
from her parents, but not from her big brother. Not the brother
that used to read her bedtime stories in silly voices, let her
sleep in his room when it was thundering outside, took her to the
Carousel at Central Park on Saturdays when he had nothing to do,
and played tea party with her and her teddies even though he
thought it was dorky. This couldn’t be the brother who taught her
how to draw princess cartoons and calmed her down before recitals
when she was so nervous she’d throw up. Now it seemed that brother
died with Poppa and now she was truly alone. Everything and
everyone she had trusted in had either left her or betrayed
her.

Allyson swallowed hard, and gritted her teeth
to stifle the tears that were trying to well up inside her, as she
remembered where she was in the present. She had tried to convince
herself that she couldn’t feel that hurt anymore. Nothing could
hurt her anymore. “Don’t let yourself go there, Ally. Remember
you’re strong; you’re a survivor. You don’t need anybody. The only
person you can trust in this world is you,” she admonished
herself.

She was glad when she felt her phone
vibrating in her purse. When she took it out and looked at the
screen, she noticed she’d gotten a message from Jason. He had
invited her to dinner on Wednesday, and they were trying to settle
on the time. Jason wanted to meet her at Menagerie at 5:00, but
that was cutting it close because she had a class that ended at
4:00, so she sent a text suggesting they meet at 6:00. The
invitation renewed her hope that he’d remembered her birthday after
all, which put her in a better mood. While she was waiting for his
reply, she decided to go shopping on the internet for her birthday
outfit. She wanted to look really special and let Jason know just
what kind of woman he had. She had just purchased a cute little
aqua paisley, silk mini dress when Pastor Bynum or what she’d call
Harlem’s own Reverend Lovejoy approached the altar.

“
Go head and praise Him for
a little bit before I get started here,” he said addressing the
congregation. Shouts of praise resounded all over the sanctuary.
Allyson felt like she was getting a headache.

“
Praise the Lord,
bretheren.”

“
Praise the
Lord.”

“
Since today is communion
Sunday, I got a short one for you all today. But just because it’s
short don’t mean its not going to be heavy. Amen?”