The Awakening: Aidan (23 page)

…

Jaylin froze. “What did you just say?”

“Aidan. He’s there.”

She whirled around to stare at the cougar and saw nothing different. “Why do you think that?”

“It’s you. When you walked in before its ears twitched and I saw the faintest flash of green in its eyes. It just happened again. It was barely there, but I swear I saw it.”

All she saw was the same feral blue that had been watching her for over a week. “Liam, I think we’re all just hoping to see a change.”

Anger reddened his face. “What is this? Some kind of Münchhausen by proxy thing for you? The longer you keep him sick the more attention you get? The poor, devoted woman left behind. You were never devoted to that man no matter how much he loved you, so stop acting like you are now.” He took a menacing step toward her. “He wouldn’t be like this if it wasn’t for you. Every damn bit of this is your fault.”

He inhaled sharply, closing his eyes, then between clenched teeth, he spat, “Fuck.”

With that, Liam spun and stalked out of the room.

As soon as his footsteps faded, she covered her mouth with both hands to stifle a cry. They all blamed her, which shouldn’t be surprising since she blamed herself. But Liam was so wrong. She was devoted to Aidan. The only thing she could truly be blamed for was being too stupid to realize it until it was too late.

That, she’d never argue with.

She turned to study the animal, pinching her lips together to keep the waterworks from starting again. She was all cried out. Her head constantly ached from it, her eyes hurt, and her face felt tight and swollen. Besides, crying wasn’t going to help Aidan. Focusing on Liam’s observation instead of his harsh words would.

Had
Liam seen something? It was almost too much to hope for after everything they’d tried. She wanted him to be correct, that they had finally found some kind of direction on how to get Aidan back.

“Aidan, if you just showed yourself to Liam, please show me. I need to know you’re in there. I miss you so much, I feel like I can’t breathe from it.”

The cougar only snarled.

Liam strode back into the room with Trevor close at his heels. “Out.”

She didn’t argue this time, just walked outside the room and waited for them to call her back in. When Trevor did, she entered the room. Neither man turned around. Both sets of shoulders were rigid as they stared at the beast.

“Come closer, Jaylin,” Trevor said. “Let it see you.”

She did as instructed. Trevor’s breathed “I’ll be damned” made her heart pound.

“Be damned what?”

“Aidan senses you.”

Her gaze jerked to the animal. Was he there? Watching her? Her heart thumped faster. Had he been there all along? “I—I don’t understand, Trevor. You’ve said there’s never been any change. Why all of a sudden?”

“It’s probably always been there, Jaylin, but we didn’t notice. All we saw was the aggression toward you. Hell, we’ve kept you from him during all the experiments.” He looked back at the cougar. “Besides, it lasts less than a second. Its eyes are completely back to normal now. See?”

She did see, and hadn’t seen the flash they both saw. She
needed
to see it!

“We’ve never seen this with anyone else,” Trevor added.

“Just me?”

He held up his hands with a frustrated expression. “Considering how we keep the animal sedated during experiments and how quick the flash is, it’s easy we missed it before now. So I can’t be certain it’s just with you. We need to test this theory. Jaylin, stay in the room. Liam, you leave.”

Liam did. When he walked back in, Jaylin stared at the cougar’s eyes, praying to see what the other two saw. She saw no change.

Trevor worked his mouth. “Interesting. Maybe we should try Britton. Is he around?”

Liam nodded. “He’s down the hall hitting on Pam.”

Jaylin frowned, but she shouldn’t have been surprised. Pam was available, and Britton was totally her type. It just seemed wrong to her that life would continue while Aidan was stuck as this rabid animal.

Trevor walked to the door and yelled for them to come into the room. Within seconds, Pam hurried in, a little red in the face, while Britton sauntered in in all his smug glory. Jaylin could’ve kicked him. She could’ve kicked him even harder when she realized she’d forgotten to turn around and watch the cougar.

All she had to go by was the pensive expression on Trevor’s face and the confused shaking of his head. The eyes hadn’t changed.

“Jaylin. One more time. Leave and come back.”

Inhaling, she left, feeling the first true ray of hope in days. As she stepped back in, she held her breath, waiting for the verdict. When Pam gasped, her wide gaze snapping from the cougar to stare at Jaylin, she had her answer.

Trevor turned around, a smile on his face. “You’re the key. You’re his mate and even though you’re not bonded, he’s still aware of you.”

She almost collapsed from the relief. If he was in there, then they could get him back. Somehow. “What should I do?”

“First I want to see what happens when you get close to the cougar again. Take a couple of steps past the chalk line.”

Jaylin swallowed. The last time she’d gotten too close, the animal had tried to kill her. Could she handle knowing it still saw her as someone who’d hurt it? Fear of being reminded of that on a daily basis had kept her on her side of the chalk line to begin with.

It didn’t matter. If Aidan were in that animal somewhere, she’d do whatever was needed to bring him back.

She stepped over the thick yellow line. The cougar immediately lowered and pounced against the bars. One long, powerful leg swiped past the steel, barely missing her chest with its sharp claws. Shrieking, she stumbled back, hand pressed to her chest, blinking tears from her eyes. She was still the focus of its rage. “Are you sure you saw Aidan? That animal hates me.”

“We saw it,” Trevor said. “Every time you walked into the room. It means something. We’ve just got to figure out what and how to use it to get Aidan back.” Trevor paced the room, rubbing his fingers across his lips. “I keep thinking the
Splycer
is somehow part of all this. It’s to blame for starting this whole mess.”

She refused to look at Liam. There were two people in the room who disagreed with that statement.

“It has to be what brings him back,” Trevor continued.

“But we tried that,” Liam said.

“Yes, while the cougar was sedated.” Trevor paused, putting his hands on his hips while he stared at the floor. “Could that be it?” he muttered before looking up. “We’ve never used the
Splycer
on rejected shifters or half shifters while they were under sedation. What if the tranquilizer is keeping the device from working properly?”

“How do you propose someone gets near him enough to see?” Liam asked.

“It can’t be just anyone. It has to be Jaylin.”

Liam immediately shook his head. “Definitely not. We might have seen a glimmer of Aidan, but we also know it is much more aggressive toward her. We can’t chance the animal hurting her.”

“There’s a reason for that, I’m sure of it. She’s his mate. All week that animal has responded to nothing we’ve tried, but she just walks into the room and we see a glimpse of human. She is the only thing that can reach him. I’m sure of it.”

“That’s all fine and dandy, but can we at least have someone else try first?”

Jaylin stepped forward. “No. It’ll have to be awake. I won’t put another half shifter in danger. If Trevor thinks it has to be me, then it’s going to be me.”

Liam eyes rounded. “You can’t be serious! Do you have any idea what would happen to him if he comes back and realizes that animal hurt you? There won’t be any convincing him that this…this
animal
wasn’t him or his beast. He’ll blame
himself
for hurting you.” His jaw clenched. “You’ve already ruined his life once. I won’t allow it to continue. There has to be another way.”

She understood why Liam was vehemently against this plan. Being the cause of her death would be a torture Aidan would never be able to bear. The really twisted part was if the animal did hurt her, it wouldn’t have been by Aidan or his beast, but Liam was right, Aidan would never see it that way. If this worked and she was able to save Aidan, but the unthinkable happened, Aidan may have been better off staying in animal form.

But if there were even the smallest chance she had the ability to bring Aidan back, she’d risk her life to do so, just as he’d risked his to save hers. Because if she succeeded, and all ended well, she was ready to embrace the future she’d been denying them both—
Fewshon
and all.

“This isn’t your choice to make, Liam.” She turned to Trevor. “How do you suggest I get close to him?”

…

“Ready?” Trevor asked.

The
Splycer
shook in Jaylin’s hand. An hour ago, the cougar had been tranquilized and strapped down. Now, it was awake, raging as it fought to get free.

Watching it lying on its side, struggling against the chains that kept its paws stretched forward and the tape keeping its mouth closed, caused her physical pain, but she knew it was best for both of them. Ensuring her safety guaranteed that Aidan returned to a living mate and not one mauled to death.

The thick leather belt wrapped around its torso kept the animal strapped to a piece of padded plywood lying on the floor—kept it immobile, making it so she could just walk in and shock it.

Then hopefully this would all be over and she’d have Aidan back in her arms.

She tightened her grip on the instrument. A part of her was petrified that she would fail, but she had to try nonetheless.

Had this been how Aidan had felt when he’d begged her to tell him how to use the device?

Terror and hope all mixed into one.

He hadn’t given up and she wouldn’t now.

“The men have to go up the hall away from the flash, Jaylin, but we’re ready to intervene if we need to. We have a camera set up so we can see what’s happening. Pam will be just over there with a tranquilizer gun, although we hope that won’t be necessary.”

Meaning if things went bad, they’d do their best to save her. With the distance between her and everyone else, she didn’t expect they’d arrive in time. And she didn’t have much confidence in Pam’s aim. That animal had been trying to get to her since it’d taken over. Nothing would stop it if she were finally within its grasp.

“Let’s just do this and get it over with, okay?”

Trevor nodded and motioned for everyone to follow. Liam stayed behind, his gaze narrowed on her. For a moment their eyes met and he gave a sharp nod before he stalked out of the room. Jaylin stared after him. If she hadn’t known how he felt about her, she’d swear she’d just garnered some approval from the man.

Inhaling, she waited until the door closed, walked toward the cougar’s cage, then wrapped her hand around the steel-barred door. The squeak it made as it opened echoed through the room, reminding her that she was about to enter a cage with a wild animal, that she
was
about to do this.

No matter the cost.

She stepped inside. The animal stilled, its blue eyes locked on hers as she inched closer. A long rolling growl warned her to stop. And she did hesitate. For a second.

Inhaling again, she took another step forward.

The man you love is inside there.

The cougar’s struggles intensified. The chain clanked hard against the floor with each mighty jerk.

She relaxed. The restraints did indeed keep the animal immobilized. Kneeling beside it, she pressed the
Splycer
into the animal’s side and clicked.

Red flashed.

And all hell broke lose.

The tape holding the lethal jaws closed snapped as it caterwauled. The chains jerked taut. One link slowly stretched, then another. The leather belt ripped. Heart in her throat, Jaylin jumped to her feet as the animal rose, its side heaving as it roared.

“Aidan! Please hear me.”

Foam formed at the corners of its mouth.

It hadn’t worked.

It hadn’t worked!

Stumbling back, her feet tangled with each other and she fell to the floor just as a huge feline body covered hers. She screamed as it opened its powerful jaws and swooped down. Jamming her hand into its side once more, she clicked just as the feel of sharp teeth compressed down on her throat.

…

No!

Aidan barreled forward, shoving the beast back as he forced the change. The taste of her blood filled his mouth. He blinked back tears.

He couldn’t lift his head. Couldn’t see what he’d done. Couldn’t face the truth.

He’d failed. He’d killed her.

His mate.

An unthinkable action.

Tears scorched the back of his eyes as he buried his face in the side of her neck. Rough hands jerked him away from Jaylin and across the room, stunning him. He blinked as a wall of shoulders surrounded the woman he loved, protecting her from him. He lunged against the people holding him, wanting to get to her side, to hold her, to apologize for failing her. “Let. Go. Of. Me.” He yanked again.

“Calm down. We need to make sure you’re back to normal.”

He froze, staring up at Liam’s and Brit’s faces as they folded around him, shoving him back.

“What are you—” he stopped mid-sentence, becoming aware that they were no longer on the island. That he was being pushed through some cage into another room. “Where am I? Liam, what the hell is going on? What did I do? Is she—”

He couldn’t even finish the sentence.

“I don’t know,” Brit said, his tone tense.

“I can’t leave her.”

“You just had her neck in your mouth,” Liam reminded him. “We can’t chance a repeat performance.”

That ceased his struggles, and he slumped forward. “I can’t believe I did that.”

Brit looked him square in the eye. “That wasn’t you or your beast, Aidan. No matter what the outcome is, you have to remember that.”

His friends ushered him down the hall and into another room. Aidan blindly sat on a chair and stared at the floor, his head cupped in his hands. How could his beast turn on its mate? He could still feel the pressure of its jaws locked around her delicate neck. How the beast had wanted to snap it. If he hadn’t come to, it would have.