The Bachelor's Sweetheart (7 page)

The projection room door creaked open. “Out of Pepsi already?” she asked. “We must have a full house of thirsty moviegoers.”

“I wouldn't know,” Josh said.

Tessa dropped her arms. “Hey. I thought you were Myles enlisting my help to change the CO2 container in the soft drink dispenser. Having a second person around when changing them is a good idea, unless you like a soda bath.”

“I remember.”

“So, how did the crowd look?”

“I didn't check. I was too starved. I came in the back and right up with the food.” He placed a pizza box on the table, threw open the top releasing the spicy scent of pepperoni and tomatoes and grabbed a piece before sitting down. “I didn't eat before I went to Ticonderoga.”

Before I went to Ticonderoga,
not
before I saw Dad
or
before we met with Dad
. Tessa's neck muscles reknotted. “How'd it go?” As if he hadn't already made the answer clear.

“I've accepted that he's back in Paradox Lake, and there's nothing I can do about it except make a concerted effort to avoid him.”

She studied the stony set of his jaw as Josh motioned toward the pizza. “You going to have some?”

“In a minute.” She clasped her hands to still the chill that ran through her despite the heat of the small, humid room. “What about Jared and Connor?”

“I can't read Jared clearly. He seems to be weighing things because of Hope. Connor's lapping up all of his baloney about making amends, wanting to get to know us as men, ad nauseam.” Josh tossed his half-finished slice on the open box top. “What does Connor need him for anyway? Jared and I are the ones who've been there for him.”

Tessa reached over to pick up a piece of pizza she didn't want and to buy some time to calm the turmoil inside so he wouldn't see it on her face. “There's no way you can give your father the benefit of the doubt, give him time to show he's changed, before you shut him out?”

“No, why should I?”

Tessa jerked straight at his vehemence, almost dropping the pizza in her lap.

“You don't know what it's like,” he said.

She knew more than he'd ever guess.

“He's not like us.”

Tessa choked down the bite of pizza she'd taken. “Have you thought about checking out an Al-Anon meeting to help you deal with your father? People there would understand.”

He glared at her. “No, I'm not sitting around spouting my personal business with a bunch of strangers.”

“After you'd gone a few times, they wouldn't be strangers.”

“Who made you such an expert?”

“I...” She checked out the time remaining in the movie, her heart pounding. “I had an experience in college.” She breathed in and out. She should tell him, even if it meant a clean break in their friendship. That might be exactly what Josh needed to heal, and she needed to stop walking on eggshells and regain her serenity.

Josh grabbed his half-eaten slice of pizza and folded it in half. “Can we talk about something else? It's not as if I'm going to choose to see him while he hangs around here, which I expect won't be for long. And once GreenSpaces has an opening for a project manager and I'm out of here, I won't have to have anything to do with him.” He crammed the slice in his mouth and took a bite.

“Yeah, sure.” The moment had disappeared, along with her courage. “We can talk about something else.”

She couldn't make Josh attend meetings, heal him and dispel his bitterness any more than Josh and his family could have made his father stop drinking. Only Josh and God had the power to heal him. She of all people knew that. Tessa clenched her jaw. She was falling into old patterns. Rather than distancing herself from Josh, as she'd decided to do, she was getting more involved in his life, being helpful so he'd like her.

He finished his pizza slice. “If you got the building permit today like you thought you would, I'm ready to start work on the renovations Monday night.”

“I didn't get the permit.” Tessa focused on the film as if she was checking on how long it had to go. “I ran an errand first, and when I got back to Schroon Lake, the building inspector had gone home sick and the clerk didn't know anything about the permit.”

Her errand had been attending an extra meeting she knew her sponsor would be at. “I'll get the permit Monday and do what prep work I can during the day. I have plans for the evening.”

A
choo choo
blasted from Josh's pocket. “One of the kids,” he said, concentrating his full attention on retrieving his cell phone. “When Brendon turned eleven, Jared and Becca got him a phone, so he could call from sports practice and Boy Scouts for rides home. His sister and Hope think it's theirs, too.”

After reading the text, he said, “Looks like I won't be available to work Monday evening after all. Hope's volunteered me to coach her soccer team, the one Hill's Garage sponsors. The person who was lined up to coach has taken a new job out of the area.”

“I know.”

He laughed, the sound lightening the atmosphere of the room. “You know what?”

“About the coach.” Tessa paused and nodded. “And that you're going to tell Hope you'll do it.”

“Ha! You're so into me that you can read my mind.”

She slugged his shoulder to ward off the pall that was descending again.

“Ouch. What was that for?” He rubbed his arm.

“I'm into you? In your dreams.”

He was in her dreams, only not in the way she'd implied to Josh. More like thoughts that kept her mind churning and her tossing and turning half the night.

“I know about the soccer coach because Suzi Hill called this afternoon and asked if I'd coach. She has a new foster kid on the team and had heard somewhere—had to be from my grandmother—that I'd played in college.” At least she had before she'd messed up and lost her spot on the team. “And you never tell Hope no.”

“You said yes to coaching, right?”

“I did. Suzi said the team has nearly as many girls as boys, and the former coach was really a husband-wife team.”

“All right!” He raised his hand for a fist bump. “We can co-coach. Wait until I show them my moves. Look out, playoffs. The team will be unstoppable.”

“Earth to Josh. We're talking second and third graders, not the US men's team.”

“And they'll be playing other second and third graders. We'll cream them.” He thumbed a message. “I texted Hope and Jack Hill.”

He hadn't even asked if she wanted him to co-coach. Coaching the team had been part of her program to distance herself from Josh and spend more time with other people. A program she intended to work as hard as her AA program, and he wasn't making it any easier for her.

He got another
choo choo
, followed by a
ding
.

“Done. That was Jack. We're the new coaches of the Hazardtown Hornets.”

His grin of pure joy, the first she'd seen since his father had reappeared, shot right to her heart, which didn't bode well for her distancing plan, either.

Chapter Six

“T
his is cool, isn't it Josh? Me playing soccer with my best friend, Sophia, and you coaching with your best friend, Tessa?” Hope jogged at Josh's side as they rounded the corner of the school toward the sports fields. He was twenty minutes late for his meet time with Tessa and ten late for the practice.

“Tessa is your best friend, right? You hang out with her all the time, and you said she's not your girlfriend.”

Josh spotted Tessa handing out the kids' Hornet shirts and socks and waved. She was dressed in fitted soccer shorts and her official coach T-shirt with a Geneseo State hoodie over it. Her long, wavy hair was pulled back in a ponytail that hung through the hole in the back of her baseball cap. He was still in his business-casual work clothes.

“Well, is she?” Hope demanded.

“Is who, what?” He'd lost track of what Hope had been saying.

She huffed. “Is Tessa your best friend?”

What was it with Hope and him and Tessa being friends? “I guess, except for Jared and Connor.”

Or maybe ahead of his brothers considering all she put up with from him. “I've never thought about it.” Tessa was Tessa, someone he liked being around and didn't have to impress.

“You don't have to think about it, you're just best friends, like me and Sophia,” Hope said, using nine-year-old logic. “I don't think you're really best friends. You'd know.”

But he didn't know and somehow that made him feel empty.

“Race you to the field,” he said, giving her a twenty-yard lead before going all out to clear his head. Ten feet from the white line delineating the soccer field, Josh slowed his pace so Hope crossed a second before he did.

“And, here making a grand entrance is Coach Josh.” With a flourish, Tessa motioned toward him. “Glad you could join us,” she added for his ears only, as she handed him his clipboard with the team roster.

“I got tied up at work and had to pick up Hope. Jared's out of town and Becca's carting one of the other kids somewhere.”

“I'm teasing.” Tessa buddy-slapped him on the back.

The jolt that shot through him raised an awareness of the warmth, then coolness of the spot where her hand had touched him. He flexed his fingers, Hope's
I don't think you're really best friends
ringing in his head. If he and Tessa weren't friends, what were they?

“Most of the team played last year,” Tessa said, “so I thought we'd scrimmage to see the kids' skills.”

“Sounds good,” he said. Tessa certainly had everything organized. He clapped his hands to get the kids' attention. “Okay, everyone line up.” He watched as the twelve kids who'd showed up for practice scrambled to form a line in front of him and Tessa. “Now count off by fours.”

Tessa tilted her head in question, making her ponytail flop over her shoulder. She so rarely wore her hair down, he'd forgotten how long it was. A picture of her at Connor's wedding filled his mind. How pretty she'd looked with her hair curling around her face and down her back.

He cleared his throat. “You'll see. To mix up the teams.”

Tessa nodded.

“Three, four,” Hope and her friend Sophia finished the count off.

“All of the ones and fours, put on your Hornets T-shirts. You'll be on Tessa's ‘shirts' team.”

“Put them on over the shirt you have on,” Tessa said. Most of the kids had on long-sleeved T-shirts or sweatshirts.

“Twos and threes are on my ‘flags' team,” Josh said, automatically thinking of the pickup soccer games he and his high school friends played and the group of girls who used to come watch them. Had Tessa done that, watched her male classmates “perform” for the girls?

Hope skipped over. “What do you mean by our team being flags?”

“I'll give you guys bandannas to tuck in your back pocket or waistband and hang down.”

Tessa handed him a package of bandannas she'd brought with the shirts.

He ripped the package open to shake off the irrational irritation that had come with the thought of Tessa watching other guys play soccer or anything else.
Get real, that would have been twelve or thirteen years ago
. Long before Josh had met her. He couldn't figure what was wrong with him. Tessa and other men had never bothered him, not that she dated much. The other day he'd encouraged her to go to the concert with Claire's friend.

“All right,” he said. “When I point to you, tell me your name, if you played soccer last year and what position if you did.” Josh went down the roster familiarizing himself with the kids' names and experience and assigning them positions for the scrimmage. Since only twelve of the fourteen kids on the roster had showed up, he had no problem getting everyone in.

“You ready over there?” Tessa asked, her hands-on-hips stance emphasizing her trim build.

He tore his gaze away. “More than ready.”

“Then let's get this game going.” Tessa blew the whistle around her neck and the teams took their positions.

As he and Tessa raced up and down the sidelines refereeing and giving their teams directions, he found his attention jumping from the kids to Tessa, watching her move with unconscious athletic grace. He'd never noticed it before. He knew she liked sports, at least watching them with him on TV, and that she ran, but lots of women did to stay trim. How had he missed that she was an athlete? The better he thought he knew Tessa, the more she surprised him with new facets.

With his team one point behind, one of the players passed the ball to Hope near their goal. “That's it,” he said, “aim.”

The ball went flying over the net, just as the parent timekeeper yelled time.

“Yay!” Tessa's team shouted in victory and ran to her.

Ignoring Tessa's motion to the kids to join her on the other side of the field where their parents were sitting, Hope dragged herself over to Josh. “Sorry.”

He put his arm around his sister's shoulders. “For what?”

“For making us lose the game. I could have tied it.”

Josh squatted in front of her. “It was a practice, and you didn't make us lose. There were five other players for your team on the field.”

“But I had the ball and I could have made a goal if I didn't kick it so hard.”

“So now you know how hard to kick the ball when we're playing a real game. That's what practices are for.”

“I guess.”

He stood and squeezed her shoulder. “That's my girl. Come on. We need to hear what Tessa is saying or we won't know what's going on.”

“Don't you already know? You're the coach, too.”

“So they tell me.”

“You're funny, Josh.” Hope pulled him across the field.

“So, we'll see you all Wednesday at five-thirty,” Tessa said. “Only one more practice before opening day on Saturday.”

The kids and their parents streamed off toward the parking lot, except for Jack Hill and a boy kicking a soccer ball down the sideline.
Had to be Jack and Suzi's new foster child
.

“I don't see Becca,” Hope said, an anxious note creeping into her voice.

“She must be running late. I'll text her. She can pick you up at my place.” Josh sent the text and grimaced. Although Hope had come a long way since she'd lost her maternal grandmother who'd cared for her most of her life, and come to live with Jared and Becca, she still had abandonment issues. But then, didn't all the Donnelly kids?

“Not bad coaching, old man,” Jack said when Josh and Hope reached them. “Bring back memories?”

“Who are you calling
old man
? I seem to remember us playing on the same team, me showing you rookies the ropes.”

“More like a senior lording over us underclassmen,” Jack said.

“That I can see,” Tessa said. “You do like to take charge.”

Josh tensed, taking Tessa's words as a dig for missing their pre-practice meeting. He relaxed. Tessa teased. She didn't criticize. “Hey, my senior year when I was captain, I took us to a sectional championship. Jack was one of my minions. You were, what, in eighth grade?”

“Ninth,” he said. “The only first-string freshman.”

“I groomed him to take my position.”

Tessa rolled her eyes.

“Right. You, coach and a lot of hard work on my part,” Jack said. “We took the sectional championship the year after you graduated, too.”

“Josh, excuse me,” Hope interrupted. “Becca's here.”

He looked over his shoulder to see Becca and his father walking toward them. He didn't want to know why he was here. If it was to see Hope practice, he'd missed it, as he missed most of Josh's games, except one. His mind shut down. He wasn't about to replay the embarrassment of that game. Josh waved at Becca and pointed to Hope. His sister-in-law and father stopped and he released the breath he'd unconsciously been holding.

“Grab your stuff and go meet Becca so she doesn't have to walk all the way out here. Let me know if you need a ride to practice on Wednesday.”

“Sure thing, Josh.” She raced across the grass.

“Bye, Hope,” the boy with the soccer ball shouted.

Hope waved her hand behind her.

The boy trotted over to Josh. “Remember me?” he asked.

“Owen, from Hope's class.”

“Yep. My brother and I are staying with the Hills now until our mother gets better.”

Josh's gaze fixed on the fading bruise that covered the whole right side of Owen's face. Refocusing, his eyes locked with Tessa's, the compassion in them making him wonder how much the bruise had to do with Child Protective Services placing the boys with Jack and Suzi.

“Did you talk to my Scout leader about the Pinewood Derby?” Owen asked. “We're supposed to order the kits pretty soon.”

“Sorry, pal, I was busy with work.” He shifted his weight back and forth on his feet. He wasn't cut out for kid stuff. Everything was so important to them. It was too easy to disappoint them. In that way, he'd admit he was like his father.

“I told you I'd help,” Jack said, throwing Josh a lifeline.

“I'd still like you to, Coach Josh, if you can. You're more like my daddy.” Owen's voice trailed off.

Lord, give me some direction
. If he was like a convicted felon and his own father, he certainly didn't have it in him to be a role model for a young boy.

“My daddy has black hair like you and me.”

A well-buried memory flickered in his mind. His dad's dark head bent over Jared's old bike, fixing it up and painting it to make the bike like new for Josh. At that moment, he'd wanted to be able to fix things, just like his dad. Josh's resistance crumbled. “Yes, I'll call Mr. Hazard. Tomorrow. Tessa, remind me in case I forget again.”

“Will do.” A smile played with the corners of her lips.

“We'd better get going,” Jack said.

As he watched the guys leave, Josh attempted to recalculate the equation that was his life—the theater renovation, his family and his father's all-too-intrusive presence, coaching Hope's soccer team, helping Owen. Those factors all tied him to Paradox Lake when the final answer was supposed to be him getting a promotion and leaving. He closed his eyes and jiggered the pieces. They were all temporary situations, except for his father, and he had no good reason to stay for his father. He was good. He had everything under control.

“You're a good guy, Josh Donnelly.” Tessa reached up and threw her arm around his shoulder.

The warmth that pulsed through him shot his neat and tidy recalculation to bits. He'd left Tessa and whatever weirdness he was experiencing about her out of the equation.

* * *

“You okay?” she asked.

“Yeah, fine. We need to collect and stow the equipment.” He picked up the duffel bag she'd used to carry the equipment and uniforms and stuffed in the ball Owen had been kicking around.

Tessa touched his arm. “Hey, this is me.” He gave her the same strangled look he'd given her when she'd flung her arm around his shoulder.

He grabbed her hand as she jerked away. She hadn't noticed the drop in temperature sunset had brought with it until his warm fingers closed around hers.

“Ignore me,” he said. “Bad day.”

If only she could. He dropped her hand and a chill ran through her at the loss of his warmth. She folded her open hoodie around her.

“One of the engineers gave me some rush modifications to do right at quitting time, so I didn't get to go home and change as I'd planned before I had to pick up Hope. And we were late anyway.” He closed the duffel and threw it over his shoulder. “I missed our strategy meeting completely. You had to run the whole practice.”

“You can only control work so much.” She knew as frustrated as he may have been, Josh wouldn't have hurried through the revisions. Nor would he have thought for a moment about saying he couldn't stay to do them.

“Then Dad showed up at the end of practice. You saw him?”

“Yeah, with Becca.”

“Once he falls back into his old habits, the parents aren't going to want him at games, around the kids.”

As futile as the effort might be, she had to try to soften his heart. “Maybe he won't. You could take things one day at a time with him like he's doing.”

He rocked back on his heels, dismissing his father. “Then Owen threw me with the Pinewood Derby. I'd forgotten all about helping him with his car.”

Tessa knew Josh didn't forget things, and he prided himself on keeping his word. The stress from his dad coming back was eating at him.

“Owen asked me that day I talked to Hope's class about my job. The expectation on his face today. I blew it.” Josh fingered the duffel rope. “Did you walk over with all of this stuff? I didn't see your car.”

She stepped in line with him, going with his subject change. “My grandmother dropped me off. Her car is in the shop, and she'd planned to go to the new Monday night Bible study at church. I figured I could catch a ride home with you.”