The Bear Who Loved Me (10 page)

Carl shook his head. “Nothing. Though Tonya probably has kept Bryn up to date.”

Then there was more conversation about people she didn't know and how they were reacting to the situation. Becca listened, trying to keep track of the names while she dialed Theo's number. She didn't know why she kept at it. If he had his phone, he would have responded by now. So she listened to the sound of his recorded message just to hear his happy voice telling her to leave a message.

Where was he?

Carl's arm landed heavy and brusque across her shoulders as he pulled her into a hug. It wasn't a gentle movement or remotely subtle. But the sudden weight of him felt solid, and she leaned into his embrace.

“We'll find him. He'll be fine and have a great story to tell his grandchildren.”

She chuckled, the sound more choke than laughter. “He's not even dating yet. Let's not leap straight to grandchildren.”

“They'll be here before you know it.”

Maybe, she thought, the idea both reassuring and depressing. She'd thought about what would happen when Theo went off to college, met a girl, and settled down. The idea pleased her to no end, but part of her wondered exactly what she'd be doing while Theo was living his life. He was the only family she had. Everyone else was gone. She didn't want to be a hanger-on in his life, but what else did she have? A business and the ability to make castle cakes for other people's children.

Fortunately, Officer Tonya chose that moment to burst through the front door. She moved efficiently as she held up a hand for silence. She was on the phone, listening intently, so everyone waited in silent for her. Which was helpful for Becca, who was busy tucking away all thoughts of her empty future in favor of finding Theo in the here and now.

“Excellent,” the woman said into the phone. “I'll meet you there.”

She thumbed off her phone, then looked at the three of them. Her eyes narrowed at Carl, who still had his arm draped across Becca's shoulders, but at her look he dropped his arm, stepped around the coffee table, and confronted the officer.

“What's going on?” His tone was all alpha, demanding a report.

She took a deep breath and obeyed his command. “Got the warrant. So the kid you killed was from a militant compound about thirty miles northwest of here. Moss family.”

Even from behind and only looking at Carl's back, Becca could see him flinch at Tonya's phrasing. But the officer kept talking, apparently oblivious to any reaction.

“ATF has been dying to get inside there, and now we've got the excuse.”

Alan piped up from the other side of the couch. “He tried to kill Carl. That's not an excuse. That's a felony.”

The officer nodded in an offhand way. “Whatever. We've got the warrant and are moving on the compound now.”

Becca stepped around Carl. “What about Theo?”

The woman hesitated for only a moment, then shrugged. “Everyone's still watching.”

“Those that aren't about to raid a militant compound,” Becca countered.

“We've got a ton of civilian watchers.” Then she squared to pin Becca with a hard stare. “Isn't it better to know if he's there or not? If he's been captured by these wackos, then we'll get him out.”

“Or get him killed!”

The woman shook her head. “Not going to happen.”

“You don't know that.” Becca didn't know why she was being so contrary. What better option did they have?

Officer Bitch pursed her lips. “There are no guarantees, Ms. Weitz. But I can tell you this: we're trained professionals and we're going to do everything we can to keep your nephew safe.”

Becca wished she found that reassuring. She didn't. And from that well of unhappiness, her next words just formed: “I'm coming with you.”

“No.” Then the woman turned to the men. “None of you are. This is not a spectator sport.” Tonya took a deep breath and looked hard at Carl. “I recognize your authority, Maximus, but the government does not. I can't—”

“I know,” interrupted Carl, and Becca could tell by the tight set to his body that he chaffed at being sidelined. “That's why we're going to sit well back from the police and wait close by for news.”

Tonya's eyes narrowed. “ATF will never allow—”

Carl spoke right over her. “If Theo's there, he might need to see his aunt. And I'll be there in case you need an alpha shifter. Doesn't matter the species, everyone responds to an alpha.”

They did? Apparently so, because Tonya's expression tightened until she looked like she was sucking on a lemon. But she still argued.

“You're injured. Doc said you needed to rest for a week.”

That thought alarmed Becca, but there was nothing she could do about it. Even she could see Carl wasn't going to be denied as he folded his arms across his chest. “Doesn't matter. You know I have to be there.”

Apparently she did, because she shot him an angry glare.

“Besides,” he added, as he headed for his coat, “you already knew I was coming. That's why you stopped off here.”

“It was a courtesy stop—”

“Whatever.”

Becca scrambled, too, pulling on her shoes and coat. Meanwhile, Officer She-Bear turned to pin Alan with her disgruntled fury. “You're not coming.”

He didn't say a word. He just stood there looking at her, his entire body tall and absolutely still.

“It's dangerous work,” the woman continued, punctuating it with a glare.

Alan lifted his chin. “I'm not the one you're angry with, Tonya, so bitch at someone else. I'm not in the mood.” And with that he set down his plate, grabbed his coat and car keys, and was out the door before anyone else.

Which left Officer Tonya standing in the middle of the room fuming silently. Becca almost felt sorry for her, but a moment later the woman recovered and fast marched out the door. She would have slammed it in Becca's face if Carl hadn't rushed forward to catch it.

“Don't worry about her,” he said softly as he gestured to his truck. “Hope that in an hour, this will all be over and you and Theo will be joining me for a hearty dinner of steaks badly cooked by my own hand.”

“You're a bad cook?”

Carl snorted. “It's hard to mess up a steak, but I've done it several times.”

“Then I'll cook. You just see that Theo is there at the table.”

“Deal.”

Then they rolled out right behind Alan's car and Tonya's squad car, all three of them heading to the Moss family compound of militant crazies. If she weren't so frightened for Theo, she probably would have laughed at the absurdity of it all. She was a baker with no military skills whatsoever. And yet here she was rolling out in a convoy like she was part of a band of badasses.

C
arl was out of control, and he hated it.

It was one thing to go all Destructo on Nick's field. The man deserved it and worse, so Carl had let his bear go wild. But that was nothing compared to what the bear wanted right now. Unfettered sexual thoughts coursed through his grizzly, and he had no idea how he was going to control it. He didn't just want to mate with Becca, he wanted her to orgasm around his dick for a decade. He wanted to lick every part of her while he planted his children in her. And he wanted it now and damn the rest of the community, his position as Max, and her wishes in the matter.

That wasn't logic. That wasn't the man in him thinking. No, this was pure animal without restraint. Which made life all the more difficult because she was sitting in his truck smelling like sex while on the way to a dangerous raid.

“Get it together,” he muttered.

“What?”

“Nothing,” he snapped.

She sighed. “It's not nothing. None of this is nothing.” She dropped her head back against the seat. “I'm so turned around, I have no idea where's up.”

He looked at her, seeing the soft curve of her cheek, the pert lift to her nose, and the circles under her eyes. It would be easy to blame her exhaustion on just the last two and a half days. Certainly that had taken its toll, but she'd been pushing hard for a long time now. He could see it in the way she closed her eyes for maybe ten seconds, then took a breath and refocused. She put away the panic and the fear, closing it down while she soldiered on. No one got so good at compartmentalizing without a lot of practice.

“You've been on crisis control for a while now, haven't you?”

“What?”

“It's not just the shifter stuff, it's everything. I know you took over custody of Theo four years ago, and that couldn't have been easy.”

“God, no. He'd lost his mother, and soon after that my mom died of lung cancer. He was one frightened preteen.”

So she'd lost her sister and mother and suddenly had to care for a grieving boy. “What did your sister do for a living?”

“She…Um…She temped sometimes. Had a stint at McDonald's for a bit. But Theo took most of her time.”

So no money there. And he knew that there was no cash from the father or the grandfather. Sure, Isaac had wanted to help out, but his sons had left so many bastards there wasn't any way to keep up.

“Who supported them while she was looking after Theo? Was it you?”

“I wish. I was busy getting my business degree plus shifts at the bakery. That's where most of our money came from—my aunt's bakery. And Mom was a nurse bringing in a good income. It wasn't until Mom got sick that things got really bad.”

“And it was you, wasn't it? You held everything together.”

She opened her mouth to deny it or at least dismiss her contribution. But in the end, she looked down at her hands. “I got the education. That meant I had to bring in the bucks.”

“I don't just mean the money, though that probably was a strain all itself. Who held Theo's hand when he was scared? Who took your mother to chemo? Who saw that the electricity got paid and there was food in the refrigerator?”

She looked at him, her mouth soft even as she narrowed her eyes at him. “What are you trying to say?”

That she'd had it hard. For a really long time. He'd been cursing himself because he was horny, but if anyone had a reason to curse, it was her. And yet here she sat, pulling it together for one more moment. One more crisis. One more day.

“Have you ever been allowed to think long term?” he asked. “Have you ever considered your future and your wants? Or has it always been about making sure the family survived?”

“My wants are my family.” She winced. “Theo.”

Right. Because the rest were gone.

“He's going to be fine. I won't let anything happen to him.” It came out as a vow, and he damn well wasn't going to falter, no matter how distracted he got. Besides, even if she weren't as important to him as his next breath, she'd become part of his clan through Theo. That made her his top priority.

She nodded, apparently grabbing on to his promise and holding it tight. They stayed silent a moment, and he watched her hands grip together. She was thinking things, worrying, and he needed to distract her. Naturally, his bear had all sorts of ideas, but that wasn't going to happen. Then she spoke, creating her own distraction.

“So what's going on between Alan and Officer Stick-Up-Her-Ass?”

“Officer…” He laughed, a choked sound. “Tonya's good at her job. She's just buttoned down. Her bear is really strong, and it's the only way she can cope.”

Becca's gaze shifted to the patrol car ahead, and he could tell she was chewing on that information. Which gave him time to sort through the rest of her question.

“And there's nothing between her and Alan. We've all known one another forever. We get to squabbling like siblings.”

“Siblings?” she said, her tone almost mocking. “If you say so.”

“Of course…” He frowned. Was it possible? Did his brother have a thing for Tonya? If so, he was one doomed camper. She was never going to go for a man who couldn't shift. She was all about the grizzly heritage and pack leadership. She was six when she'd decided to become Maxima. Alan was so human he wasn't even hairy. “I hope you're wrong,” he muttered.

“Tonya doesn't like him?”

“Tonya has her sights somewhere else.” Until he officially proclaimed her his beta at the next clan meeting, she would still think about being his Maxima. And even that promotion might not deter her. She was one determined woman. And, to his surprise, Becca picked up on the problem without him needing to explain it.

“Tonya wants you,” she said. It wasn't a question. And then she figured out the rest. “That's why you wanted us to shower. So she wouldn't smell us on each other.” Then she looked down at her clothes. His clothes. “And any lingering scent could be explained by my wearing your clothes.”

He'd wanted her to wear his things, period. He wanted her to settle into his bed and never leave while he fed her with his own hand from game he had killed himself. Which wasn't so much bear as Neanderthal. Meanwhile, he had to explain himself to her. “I'm not ashamed of what we did.”

She didn't react, obviously keeping her emotions locked down.

“This isn't the time to declare a relationship,” he said carefully. “I want to, but…”

“It's not a relationship,” she said softly, her gaze shifting back to the open road. “It was blowing off steam. Let's not make it into anything more than that, okay?”

His hands tightened on the wheel and it took all his willpower to suppress his bear's howl of rage. Nothing more than blowing off steam? Did she understand nothing?

Except logic supported her statement. After all, she wasn't the only one strung tight. Even before Theo's disappearance, he'd been on edge. The clan dissent and pressure to marry Tonya were growing exponentially. Of course he'd turn to the first woman who was outside of all that idiocy. Especially one who was soft and nurturing. Maybe after Theo was found and Nick was sorted out, he'd discover that they had nothing in common. What did he know about baking or a mundane life in Kalamazoo?

Maybe.

Except it sure as hell didn't feel that way.

“That's why I thought we should shower,” he said. “To avoid distractions. But I'm not ashamed.”

“Neither am I.”

That was something. Especially since her scent confirmed the statement. She was determined. No shame stink on her. “After this is all over, I thought we could go out to dinner.”

She looked back at him, her lips curving into an incredulous smile. “The man who just gave me the best orgasms of my life is asking me out on a date?”

“Um…yeah?”

“Um…okay.” Then her expression tightened. “But afterward.”

“Definitely. Not until Theo is at home and grousing about his geometry homework.”

Her expression softened. “I like that you know he's taking geometry. Even if it is kind of stalkery.”

He shrugged. “I make a point of knowing all the pre-shift kids. As much as I can.”

Which was pretty much the end of their conversation, as Tonya took a turn onto a back road that he knew would eventually lead to a fenced perimeter and the Moss family compound. Way up ahead he could see patrol cars and a couple ATF vans. Tonya stopped well before they got there, parking her car sideways across the road before she jumped out. Then she stood there with her arms on her hips to reveal her gun. She took enough time to point to the side of the road where, presumably, they were supposed to park.

He did, though he resented not getting closer to the action. And his bear was beyond pissed that his beta thought she could give him orders.

“Guess we're supposed to stay well back,” Becca said.

“Guess so.”

He and Alan parked their vehicles and stepped out. Tonya didn't even give them the chance to speak.

“You have to stay here or I'll have to put you in handcuffs.”

Alan mirrored her pose, showing off his holstered Glock. “You say the sweetest things,” he drawled.

“Don't antagonize her,” Carl snapped as he pulled a couple shotguns out his truck and tossed one to his brother.

“I'm not antagonizing,” his brother countered. “I'm inviting.”

It was Alan's typical banter, but for the first time Carl wondered if there could be more to it. He glanced at Becca, who was watching Tonya with a tight expression.

“Can you tell me what's going to happen?” she asked, her voice admirably strong.

Tonya gestured behind her. “Over there is the Moss family acreage complete with barbed wire and honest-to-God gun turrets. We're going to knock on the front door and show them the warrant. They're going to let us in nice and polite because they have no choice, and no one is going to shoot anything or anyone.”

Becca sighed. “Why don't I believe it'll go that smoothly?”

“Because you don't know us,” Tonya answered. Then her expression softened. “If Theo is in there, we'll find him.”

“Okay,” Becca said softly. “Thank you.”

Carl squeezed her arm and gave her an encouraging smile. “It'll be just like she said.”

Becca eyed the shotgun on his hip with a wry expression. He shrugged.

“It's just a precaution.”

Alan chimed in from the other side of the truck. “Absolutely. Don't plan to fire a shot.”

Which was the God's honest truth…in part. They were here just in case the Moss family was larger than expected. In case things got out of control. In case…any of a thousand possibilities occurred. Meanwhile, Tonya got back into her car. He thought she'd leave without another word, but she dropped her window long enough to shoot Alan a glare. “That Glock better be registered.”

“You can come check my paperwork anytime.”

She didn't respond except to roll her eyes and then she drove farther down the road. Meanwhile, Carl couldn't keep himself from touching Becca. “It'll be fine,” he repeated. “You'll see.”

She nodded, probably knowing he was reassuring himself as much as her. And then she looked at his gun. “Why do you need that? Can't you go…” She raised her hands like claws and mouthed, “Grrrr.”

It was adorable and he wanted to kiss her right then and there, but he held himself back. “Can't until I get some rest. Only the wolves can change more than once a day, and that's only around the full moon. Most of us can't even do that. It takes a ton of energy to switch forms.”

“So you're stuck as a man?”

Only someone who'd never been around shifters would call it “stuck” being human. They all thought it was cool to suddenly become an animal. No one ever thought about the cost. Or that between animal and man, nothing in his head was ever peaceful.

“Some of us like it as a man,” he said gently.

“Only someone who can shift easily would ever say that,” groused his brother in a weird reverse echo of his own thoughts.

Then another voice spoke, deeper than theirs and thick with disuse. “And both of you suck in either body.”

Mark stepped out from the trees. His dark hair looked shaggy, his face haggard, but his eyes were bright and his mouth was curled in a smile. God, it'd been years since Carl had seen that smile, though what it meant was anybody's guess.

“At least we don't smell,” countered Alan. “When was the last time you took a shower?”

“This here is one hundred percent natural musk,” Mark said as he clasped Alan's hand and drew him into a bear hug much to Alan's gagging discomfort. “Not that froufrou shit you use.”

Carl almost smiled at the exchange. It seemed friendly and human. But Mark didn't touch people if he could help it, which made that bear hug suspect. And sure enough, while he watched, Mark dropped something into Alan's pocket.

“Okay, morons,” Carl drawled, his gut knotting as he guessed what was going on. “Cut that shit out. Tell me what's happening. And while you're at it, Mark, tell me when was the last time you ate with utensils and slept in a bed.”

Mark shoved Alan away and snorted. “Yes, sir, Mr. Max, sir.” There was no respect in his tone, just a teasing camaraderie. He started to speak, then sniffed the air, his gaze going unerringly to Becca.

Great. Even in human form, the man's nose was better than a wolf's.

“Hello, ma'am,” Mark said as he held out his hand. “I'm Mark Robertson, the only bear worth shit in the Gladwin clan. Your Theo is a good kid. I'll get him home safe.”

“Thank you,” she said as she shook his hand, her tiny fingers completely engulfed by Mark's massive paw. “And please call me Becca.”

“Becca,” he said with a low, throaty growl that immediately spiked Carl's irritation. Without willing it, his body started to bulk and if he hadn't been too exhausted to shift, he'd have sprouted fur.